We Were Stupid, We Got Caught ( closed )

[bardbarous]

Who: Tuck bardbarous, Vyng spiritwalks, and Fat Billie wapples
What: The Spout Lore fam live together, love together, and then one of them gets kidnapped
When: during the month of November
Where: Sleeper Farms and other places

Content Warnings: child endangerment, torture, body mutilation

Comments

Sleeper Farm

[bardbarous]

[ No matter where Vyng finds himself at that very moment, Tuck's omen tracks him down from the second he materializes on familiar soil. It's with unerring attention that he follows his prey to the very ends of the earth, letting nothing keep it from its mission.

Just over the neighboring houses a barking dog is suddenly run off with a yelp when the large otter-like omen strikes out with a mute snarl. Nothing stands between it and its prey. And that includes this fucking fence! It tears through with sheer stubbornness and supernatural teeth until it squeezes through the hole it has made. No nevermind that it's incorporeal.

Once it lays eyes on Vyng, the large water hound follows in his steps with silent persistence until its presence is known. That's when it finally opens its mouth to speak in its Sleeper's voice. ]

"Hey, so, I think I've been kidnapped? I'm not sure where exactly. Hmm, maybe I can ask one of these guys—Hey! Yeah, you. The fucked up one in the robe! Ah, shit you're all fucked up. Uhh, the one without a trachea, hi. Listen, can you tell me where we are? Please? Don't—Hey, don't ignore me!

"What a little bitch. Anyway, I'm hanging from, like, a meat hook? I think they're gonna harvest my organs, sooo if you could come save me? I think someone peed in my loincloth."

[spiritwalks]

[Vyng looks up from his naturalist drawings scattered across the writing desk, startled by his best friend's voice — and how it's coming out of an otter-dog's face. (A bad omen, if he ever saw one.) He sets his quill down to listen with rapt attention.

...

...

...Well, shit.

Righteous anger flares in the pit of his stomach. (Meat hooks? Organ harvests? What the fuck!?) Vyng nearly snaps the pen in his grip. Whoever these robed wretches are, they're going to rue the day they messed with his family.

But this is the part where he's supposed to say something reassuring, isn't it. Of course, when put on the spot like this, the soothing-word well can start to run pretty dry.]

Hang tight, bud! But not too tight. We don't want you bleeding out everywhere. Just, just— Hold on, alright? We're gonna get you out of this mess.

[bardbarous]

[ The omen can say no more to Vyng, its one duty as a voice recorder complete. It stands up on its hind legs as if to sniff the air around them. Then in an instant the omen is gone, leaving behind a dark implosion of smoke to return faithfully to its owner. ]

[spiritwalks]

[It relayed the message, though, right?

...Vyng has no fucking clue.

Hm.]

[spiritwalks]

[Okay, no, time to focus. Vyng shoots to his feet and casts his eyes around the tent.]

Billie? You asleep somewhere, bud?

Rescue

[spiritwalks]

[Through some combination of quick-thinking, a sprinkle of luck, and blundering their way through social encounters...Vyng and Billie have made it into, uh. Well. Whatever this place is.

Casting his eyes around, Vyng takes in their surroundings. It's like a factory from the pre-Exodus era. Steel pistons. Metal staircases winding in a dizzying number of directions. And rows of...stalls?

He glances down at Billie.]

Ever seen anything like this before, bud?

Doggone it!

[spiritwalks]

I think it's cute.

[Vyng stands beside Tuck, watching Billie scamper around with his new canine companion. Every so often, the dog dutifully points with its paw toward the next cluster of edible mushrooms. Billie's basket is amassing a small collection at this point — he's actually collecting them faster than he can eat right now.]

See? He has a friend now.

Tats for Tots

[spiritwalks]

Shenanigans at Shiro's

[spiritwalks]

Mayhem at Michael's

[spiritwalks]

[wapples]

Huh? What? No, I'm awake!

[No, he wasn't, he just doesn't want to admit he was napping.

Billie comes out of the kitchen rubbing his eyes.]

What's going on?

[spiritwalks]

[Maybe he should figure out a delicate way to put this, but...ah, fuck it. They can't waste any time.]

Tuck's been kidnapped. We need to find him.

[wapples]

What? Who? Where?

[The sleepiness is gone, suddenly replaced with alarm and fury. No one kidnaps his dads! He scampers back to the kitchen to get his raccoon skin and his daggers, then immediately back to Vyng.]

What're we waiting for? We gotta go!

[bardbarous]

I know, but already has two friends. [ Tuck is very much the displeased parent as the pair of them watch Billie scrubbling around in the dirt. ] We've got Francis and Shia's wolf for him to play with. And we've got you, me, him to feed. Plus another animal. Oh ggggod, how're we gonna get enough food every day?

[spiritwalks]

It'll be fiiine. First of all, people in town look after each other. Just offer to do some yard work for the grocer. Or show up with a bunch of pretty rocks you found at the beach. People love that stuff. Luca told me.

Second, Billie's resourceful. If he isn't satisfied with what we've got, you know he's gonna hit his own little food-run circuit. That's what he does.

And third, you don't need to worry about feeding me. I can just forage, you know?

[A beat.]

Maybe I'll get a goat.

[bardbarous]

Don't get a fucking goat! They eateverything! Literally everything! Back in Makaal, there were roving gangs of goats, and they would annihilate a whole dumpster of food in under twenty minutes! If you were on the wrong side of the sticks when lunch time was finished, there'd be nothing left!

And we already have a sentient goat—Billie! What if his usual food circuit is another Sleeper's stockpile, because we've got nothing left at home because all the fucking animals ate it all?

[spiritwalks]

[Traumatic as it may be, the story only bolsters Vyng's case.]

But we could feed our goat compost. You don't want Billie eating that, do you? The goat would be doing us a favor.

[spiritwalks]

[By the time Billie returns, Vyng has already collected a couple of gas masks and a tiny pair of gloves. He bends down and extends the smaller mask out to the boy.]

Hold on a second there. We've gotta finish suiting up first, Billie. Want me help you put this mask on? Or do you wanna try it yourself?

[Since the extra protection isn't negotiable, the least Vyng can do is let him choose how to put it on.]

[wapples]

Huh? What's this for?

[He takes the gas mask and shrugs. He trusts if Vyng says they have to wear them, then they have to wear them and pulls it on over his head. He immediately starts to complain.]

It smells weird, and it's hard to see.

[It's hard to see because he has it on completely backwards. Good job, Billie.]

[spiritwalks]

There's a bunch of blood pollution outside. We need to be careful and not inhale too much of it, or else we could get sick and lose our way. These masks are gonna help with that.

[He wonders if that's what happened to Tuck. How else could anybody manage to kidnap somebody so huge?]

You almost got it there, bud. [A generous definition of "almost", maybe...but, listen, they're all doing their best here.] Try turning it around?

[wapples]

Oh. Okay.

[Billie grabs the mask and turns it around so it's facing the right away. He's still not a fan, and he still finds it a little hard to see through, but at least this is a little more acceptable. He still dislikes it enough that he's not going to admit to the improvement.]

We don't have to wear them all the time, do we?

[spiritwalks]

Not all the time, no. Just when there's a red mist outside.

[...He hopes it isn't all the time, at least. Blood pollution seems to ebb and flow with the seasons, and Vyng wants to believe there are clearer days ahead of them yet. With that thought, he fastens his own mask and reaches for his spear.]

Tuck said something about fucked-up people in robes. That's probably who we need to be on the look-out for.

Have you seen anyone like that, Billie?

[bardbarous]

[ Tuck stares at his best friend, wheels turning behind his eyes at this solution. ]

... How much compost are you making on a daily basis, Vyng? Do you have mystery piles of shit somewhere I don't know about!

[ Shiro probably knows about them. Stupid fucking Shiro. ]

[spiritwalks]

...You mean like the ones that keep clogging the toilet?

[bardbarous]

Th-Those aren't mysterious! And the food here gives me digestive problems! You know that!

[ Way to dunk on him like that, Vyng, ya dick!! He's in a buuulk phaaase! ]