droptheious: (I've experiments to run)
Varian ([personal profile] droptheious) wrote in [community profile] deercountry 2022-03-06 11:19 pm (UTC)

[Varian, at least, is not looking for comfort. He's received comfort for his actions before, from well-meaning friends trying to reassure him that this wasn't his fault, or that he shouldn't beat himself up over it. It's never sat well with him. It's been years now, and the time has made him not hate himself quite as much as he used to, but the self-loathing is still strong. It's just not all-consuming anymore.

The fact Lance doesn't immediately lean on comfort means a lot. He doesn't think he could handle that. He knows who he used to be. He knows what he did. None of those things deserves comfort. Just cold, hard truths. Lance takes a fair middle ground and he can live with that.

He watches as Rapunzel touches the rocks, as she comes further into her power and destroys his fleet singlehandedly. How she saves Cassandra and her mother and leaves his machines broken and powerless. And after all that, she still asks the guards not to be too hard on him, when he's led away in chains.
]

I was an idiot. It's- it's not who I am anymore, and I fixed things back home...eventually. After a few more mistakes. I-

[He watches the prison wagon take him away and one of the moon flowers blooms the space it left behind. He stares at it, his chest aching.]

I never want to be that person ever again.

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