return those voices echoing in the sea (closed)

[entreats]

Who: Ange and assorted CR.
What: A catchall for event threads.
When: During December
Where: Mostly in memoryscape, some other stuff all across Trench.

Content Warnings: Child abuse, bullying, suicidal ideation, violence, gore, blood, character death

( it's a catchall for closed event threads! if i didn't promise you a starter on this already, but you'd still like to play something out with ange during the event - especially when it comes to the winter mourning - please let me know by either pming this account or contacting me on plurk at queeningsquare! )

Comments

[entreats]

[ It's not that she doesn't notice his concern. After all, it's basically radiating off him, especially with the way he grabs her arm like that. And it's not like Fern is ever too subtle about displaying his emotions, unlike Ange.

And yet she stares, looking a little baffled all the same. ]

I mean.. is that so bad?

[ That Trench is all she's got, she means. She can understand why the idea of her dying might be bad to other people, she's not that socially or emotionally dumb. Especially when Fern has shown before that he cares about her. ]

It's not like we're still in the dream. [ That existence felt a lot more unstable. ] And my own world.. well, it sucked. It's not like I'd want to go back there anyway. I really don't mind that Trench is just my life now.

[ She sounds sincere about that. And she is! While Ange might downplay a lot of things to look cooler or tougher, she wouldn't lie this badly to a friend - especially not while they're having a vulnerable moment together. ]

[laminae]

[His surprise and unhappiness don't abate at all. This is really serious, even if it she doesn't necessarily agree.]

Yeah it is! It doesn't matter where we are right now, that you still had to go through that - that you know you go through that - it's really messed up! Even if you don't wanna go back that's still awful.

[He lets go of her, folding his arms.]

I know what it's like. You could have the best life in Trench, but it doesn't change the fact that this is still part of your life.

[entreats]

I.. find it easier to not think about it too much.

[ Maybe the exact reason she's offering up this much in the first place is because of what Fern is saying. 'I know what it's like', he says. Maybe he can understand if she tries to explain it in this way, if he has experiences that mirror her own.

She shakes her head. ]

It's not like I'm denying it happened. [ After all, she knows it did. She knows that every single crappy experience back home molded her into who she is.

And maybe the same counts for Fern. ]

But I just want to put it behind me now. I want to become a better person. A happier one. One that isn't linked to.. [ She pauses, then gestures at the sheer mess they created all around them. ] .. to this.

Haven't you felt that way as well?

[laminae]

[As much as he knows how unhealthy it is (now), he gets that. It's much easier to shove something like this in his mental vault instead of dealing with it. But from his experiences in Deerington he knows that that can't fly anymore, not if he doesn't want to hurt his friends and family.]

I... guess. Sort of. It'd be nice to just put everything behind me, but I don't think I ever can. That stuff is still part of me, so even if I keep on moving forward it's always still gonna be part of me.

[Just like he couldn't leave behind the grass part of himself and be Finn, or the Finn part of himself, or things like help start a war, trying to kill Finn. All of it.]

I'm trying to be better at accepting it. Or at least tolerating it.

[entreats]

[ ... ]

I guess it's different for both of us.

[ But it kind of makes sense. Because the painful things Fern went through, with Finn and the grass demon and all.. that is - quite literally - what made him who he is. Not thinking about that might mean denying what he is.

But.. this? Ange looks around her. What did this do for her? It just gave her pain. It was just pure suffering for someone else's sake.

There's no way this could be important. ]

I.. think it's fading too. [ She slowly says, as she glances around her. It's like the memory is starting to unravel at the edges now it's over. ]

[laminae]

Guess so.

[In his opinion that sucks, but it is what it is. He isn't about to change her opinion on something so visceral and personal as this, and he knows she won't try to do the same with him. As long as they're both there for each other - that's the important thing.

He tenses up slightly when Ange points out the edges of the memory fraying. It instinctively unnerves him, and he steps away from the edges, closer to Ange.]

Oh - yeah. Guess the city's done messing with us. [He glances over at her.] You gonna be okay?

[entreats]

Yeah.

[ It's said softly, but.. it doesn't sound like she's lying. This is a memory she still would have remembered pretty well even without it being forced to the forefront of her mind like this. And it felt a little less bad going through it with a friend - knowing that she isn't alone.

It's a dumb reminder of this memory, sure, but she can deal with it.

She glances at him, still thankfully able to see him with how he moved closer to her. ]

.. you too?

[ He did just kill a bunch of people, after all. And then got that unfortunate news about her. ]

[laminae]

[It's good to hear that she'll be okay. That's a relief - he can see how reliving such a terrible memory could have hurt her.

He doesn't hesitate in nodding an answer to her. As horrible as it is to kill people Fern is pretty okay with it. Having been literal weapons helped with that mindset - the Grass Demon definitely doesn't mind, especially since it helped her out.]

I'm good. Those jerks deserved it.

[entreats]

[ Ange lets out a soft breath, and then even faintly smiles. ]

They did.

[ She's not going to deny that. A bunch of men who'd kill a teenage girl for no reason other than money - and her aunt, who wasn't able to change herself for the better even at the last moment before she died, back in Ange's actual memory.

There was no other possible end to this. ]

.. I'm sure I'll see you again soon, Fern.

[ As the memory has grown almost entirely black around them, Ange says that. And then she only manages to add-- ]

Thank you.

[ -- before the memory fades entirely, leaving both of them back at the separate places they were before they were pulled into the memory in the first place. ]