deercountry | ( the dog days are over )

Then...

[ she's at a small loss, but she knows that he'll be a vampire again. what katherine wants, katherine gets, even when it feels incredibly impossible. but if the impossible is truly that—impossible, well... she has a plan for that, too.

she shrugs a shoulder and downplays it. ]

I'll take the cure.

No, you won't.

( he's not going to let her do that. she doesn't want to be a human and he's not going to let her do that. )

Uh uh. No, if I'm a human, you're not taking the cure. No.

[ she chuckles, taken aback and yet not completely surprised. if he didn't have such a reaction, she'd truly think the venom isn't completely out of his system.

it makes her flush. she's grateful for her vantage point. ]

Why not?

Because you don't want to be a human.

( and he knows it. he doesn't want to be a human either but he is one and she has a choice. she doesn't need to do that. )

It would upend your entire life, Katherine.

And?

[ while he may have a point—an undeniably good point—katherine refuses to see it. or she does see it, but she doesn't particularly want to agree with him. no, she doesn't want to be human at all... but she does want to be with him. ]

You promised me that you wouldn't leave me. I'm just making sure you keep your word.

This isn't my fault.

( and he doesn't want her taking the cure and becoming human when he knows that's not what she wants and that it might change her life and make her resent him. )

I wouldn't want you to do this for me.

I never said it was.

[ it's deerington's fault. it's whoever created the ability for a vampire to be stripped of his or her vampirism. magic comes with its loopholes and katherine, a loophole finder extraordinaire herself, is tired of them. ]

Is it so hard to believe I'd do it for myself?

If it's for you, why have you never done it before?

( because it's not for her, not entirely. if she wanted to be a human, wouldn't she have taken the cure already? )

You don't want to be a human.

Because I wasn't living, Stefan. I was running. I spent five centuries running from a monster.

[ and being a vampire had equipped her with the means of staying several steps ahead of klaus. but katherine knows that she would've been able to stay ahead of him even as a human. she may not have had the longevity of her life as she does now, but vampirism has only amplified traits she had as a girl. it's taken her a long time to acknowledge that vampirism didn't unlock anything inside of her, it only made it stronger. ]

Now... [ she sighs quietly. ] Maybe I know what it's like to live an actual life.

( it's probably stupid to be arguing about this because they don't know if he's going to go back to being a vampire or not. it might be premature but still. )

I just...

( he trails off and sighs. )

I want you to think about that before doing it. Because it would be such a huge thing.

I have.

[ since luca, really. while he exists somewhere, he doesn't exist here. and maybe katherine can make that happen, finally bringing him to the both of them. it's something that she lets herself think about when stefan isn't around. being a vampire has given her so much, but she's since learned thanks to deerington what it's also robbed from her. ]

Wouldn't you come to resent me if I was a vampire and you weren't?

No.

( he would be envious and he'd hate the fact that he wouldn't be able to be with her forever but he wouldn't resent her. )

This is who you are. This is who I know you as. I wouldn't want you to change that.

[ then she thinks he's a better person than she is. being a vampire is all she's known. she's been one longer than he's been human. but she thinks that, as one of the very few vampires who has never turned off her humanity… she could do human. ]

But I could still be that person as a human.

[ she thinks, at least. she'd have to be a lot more careful. everything she's taken for granted, she couldn't any longer.

but if he's a human, well... it just makes sense. ]

Being a vampire isn't all there is to me. I know you know that.

I do know that.

( he sighs and closes his eyes, not wanting to really talk about this right now but...maybe they should just in case. )

I know you'd be an excellent human. I just don't want it for either of us.

Because you want to spend five thousand years with me?

[ she laughs lightly. while it may sound like a joke, it's not entirely. if they're human, they have an unknown expiry date. as vampires... katherine's lived for five hundred years and she knows that despite having that much time under her belt, she hasn't finished living. if anything, she knows she's started. ]

I don't know if this world's going to last for five thousand more years but...yes.

( he's been happy and content the last few years. he'd like that to continue on if he can get the chance. )

But I think you taking the cure should be something we talk about more. Later. If I don't go back to being a vampire.

[ if stefan doesn't revert back to being a vampire, she's taking that cure regardless of what he says. thankfully for katherine, she's smart enough not to say that loud. it'll get him all up in arms when he needs to keep them tucked against her. ]

So you admit it.

[ here we go, the teasing. ]

You can't live without me.

I could live without you. It wouldn't be a great existence and I wouldn't be happy but I could. I don't want to live without you.

( there's a difference. )

I want to be with you for as long as I possibly can.

[ she purses her lips and shakes her head. that's everything a girl who's very into romance and swooning wants to hear, stefan. she brushes her fingers through his hair and gives him a little tug. ]

You sure know how to romance a girl. You had more suave as a vampire.

Ow.

( it hadn't hurt that bad. still, he sighs and tries to shift a bit. but the movement pulls at his back and he exhales painfully. )

That wasn't the right answer?

Hardly.

[ she cards her fingers through his hair to quietly rectify where she's tugged him. katherine can give pain, but she can also comfort when she wants to. ]

It should've entailed longing and suffering and you throwing yourself in my funeral pyre. You should be unable to breathe without me. Life would be meaningless.

[ it's very clear by her playful tone that she's doing just that: playing. ]

I can't really do that right now, if you remember. You won't let me leave this bed.

( so, he can't throw himself anywhere, katherine. )

Besides, I'd really rather not throw myself on anything funeral related for you.

No?

[ she cocks her brow, smiling curiously. ]

Then what would you rather throw yourself on in relation to me?

[ his answer's bound to be predictable at this point. he can nag all he likes; he's not leaving until he's healed. but he can dream. ]

I would throw myself on you if I had to.

( it's a strange question in the first place. he doesn't even know. he laughs and shakes his head. )

That's the only thing I could see myself doing that to. I don't want to throw myself on anything bad.

[ she ruffles his hair roughly, laughing. ]

That's the only answer. I'm glad to see you're recovering well, Stefan.

[ if he's said anything else—a bed, a pile of snow, a bunch of diaries—she thinks he won't be leaving the hospital bed anytime soon.

her hand grows gentle in his hair, ruffling it softly. ]

You're not going to the bakery by yourself anymore.

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