Fine. I'm sure that'll be enough for an explanation.
[ she reaches forward. her fingers drum on the table, for a moment. ]
To put it simply, death means very little to me. Hardly pleasant, of course, but more an inconvenience than anything to be afraid of. [ one fingernail taps, louder than the others. ] The first time I died... hmm, that's not quite right. The first time I looped, I would've been sixteen, so... Showa 63.
[ she remembers the place between worlds. the sea of fragments, staggering in its boundless infinitude. and though it helps her none to stay silent about it, she doesn't say a word. this is her own rebellion - an act of reassurance. of self-control. ]
And then, when I woke, I was eleven once again. [ she snaps. ] Six years, gone like that. The next time... Was it another six, or only five? It hardly matters. It all starts to blur together after so long. [ she snaps. and then she snaps again- and again- and again- and again- ]
At this point, I haven't the foggiest idea how old I am. Centuries, at least. I never bothered to count, and I can't imagine I'd have stayed sane if I did.
[ there. her piece is said. she reaches forward, picking up the glass of water and taking another sip. ]
no subject
[ she reaches forward. her fingers drum on the table, for a moment. ]
To put it simply, death means very little to me. Hardly pleasant, of course, but more an inconvenience than anything to be afraid of. [ one fingernail taps, louder than the others. ] The first time I died... hmm, that's not quite right. The first time I looped, I would've been sixteen, so... Showa 63.
[ she remembers the place between worlds. the sea of fragments, staggering in its boundless infinitude. and though it helps her none to stay silent about it, she doesn't say a word. this is her own rebellion - an act of reassurance. of self-control. ]
And then, when I woke, I was eleven once again. [ she snaps. ] Six years, gone like that. The next time... Was it another six, or only five? It hardly matters. It all starts to blur together after so long. [ she snaps. and then she snaps again-
and again-
and again-
and again- ]
At this point, I haven't the foggiest idea how old I am. Centuries, at least. I never bothered to count, and I can't imagine I'd have stayed sane if I did.
[ there. her piece is said. she reaches forward, picking up the glass of water and taking another sip. ]
Well? Do you believe me now?