Thanks, but I've probably tested more toys than can even fit on these shelves.

[He idly picks up a packaged double-pronged dildo with the brand "NAUGHTY LIZARD" emblazoned on the front, examining it with all the marked disinterest of someone leafing through a magazine about potato farming.]

My, uh... former mistress was all about trying new experiences. Not just once or twice, either-- ever see one of these things actually snap in half from overuse? 'Cause I've seen several.