deercountry | (no subject)

[Willow knows a bit about resurrection from her own world as well, but she's past the point where she's willing to talk much about it. All of it is a particularly dangerous branch of magic, and there's only one such spell she's ever known to work, and even then, only in a very specific set of circumstances.]

I think so... So you were brought back to life, but when you came here, it's like whatever changes happened when you were brought back in your own world just aren't a thing here?

[she remembers a brief, yet agonizing moment of pain, then nothing. until her spirit felt strong enough to be seen by others. even then, only her boyfriend, now husband, and her mother could see her. it wasn't an experience she ever wanted to repeat, especially as she had no idea where her third self was]

Well, not quite. I died and was sent to the other world for three years. Then I went back home for three years, back to the other world for a few months. Now I'm here. I seem to be zipping along the cosmos like a pinball.

[Willow looks entirely sympathetic as she nods along as Tinya explains how she's been ping ponged into various worlds over the last several years. Her own journey has been shorter and as far as she's aware, she's still alive and well at home, but she can empathize with how bracing the back and forth can be.]

I've known a few other people who were, or are, in the same boat. I don't have any answers to the whys or hows for you, though, sorry. I hope you find something, though.

[Tinya appreciates the sympathy. for all she says and does to try and be strong and not let her circumstances break her, she still appreciates it when people acknowledge that the past three years had basically sucked. and she misses her son and her husband more than she can say.

a rueful smile] Well. At least it's not just me? I was kind of starting to wonder what I did to piss off the cosmos for it to be doing this to me. I mean, I came back from the dead once, someone must like me. But someone else must really not like me. Or is it a fluke? [and a warmer smile] Thank you, so do I.

It's definitely not just you. It was a thing in Deerington too - the dream Trench came from. I knew a few people who went through the same thing.

[She's never really dug into the hows or the whys of Sleepers being brought here, or the dream after death, though. Mostly, she's just been glad to see them alive and well again.]

Coming back from the dead here, though, is definitely a way more common thing. At least, from what we've seen so far anyway.

All right, just so long as I'm not telling myself that I'm going mad. I wasn't sure how common it was to hop from home to another world. Then home again and yet another world. [she sighs and looks dejected. her husband and son have never felt further away]

Really? And it was an automatic coming back from the dead? [hers had cost her far more than she was ever going to be willing to admit]

No, even the world hopping thing isn't really unusual here. I know a lot of people who came here from Deerington, and some of us ended up back home again at one point or another too.

[She still sometimes misses the people she was closest to back home, but especially with Tara - and to a lesser extent, Faith - Sunnydale doesn't seem quite so far away any more.]

I think so. You just kind of go back to being a squid in the ocean until you come back to shore again.

Well, at least I'm not fate's only chewtoy. I'd honestly begun to wonder.

[but it's weird to have two sets of memories from the exact same three years. then, there was Phase...but the other self was buried down deep where she could never wrest control of their body]

That's...well, I won't say that it's better or worse. It's certainly something, though. Are you okay, though? [she worries that the question was presumptuous, they'd just met, but her own death made her sympathetic to those who'd experienced the same]

I would bet on you having enough people in the same boat here that you could probably even start your own support group on that one.

[Willow offers a little smile, and a nod at the question. Okay is a very subjective term, but she's alive, she's remained physically unharmed after everything, although things have been... both complicated and confusing since her return.]

Yeah... There's still some, uh, lingering side effects, but there's probably a solution here somewhere to it. It's been weird, even by the usual Deerington standards, but I'm okay.

Oh, wow. That would really be something. I wonder if there's anyone who's died three times? At home, here, both, any of them would count. They would need a reward or maybe a stiff drink.

[okay is very subjective after coming back from the dead. she tries to not think about it anymore, but there are always little reminders here and there, like old Terran landmines. she'd imagine it was the same for anyone back from the dead]

I'm glad. Coming back from the dead...it's really stressful. Do you know anyone else who's been where you are, too?

There could be, but no one here I know off hand.

[There was only one person Willow knew back in Deerington who had died three times, and she knows, thankfully, Salem is unlikely to turn up here in Trench. It would not surprise her in the least to know that there may be others, however.]

No one who's had quite the same experience, but there seems to be some of that going around here anyway. Sometimes people are affected differently by different things here.

Me, neither. [a short laugh] I worry that I may be tempting fate.

[and that if she did come back, Phase would start fighting for dominance again. she didn't want to have to repress her "sister" again, but would if she had to]

Making it nearly impossible to judge what might happen. That's the worst. And...is it like the monthly things? With how they affect different blood types?

God, that's true. Around here, you never know, do you?

[It's a half-hearted attempt at humour before she turns serious again.]

Um, I haven't seen any patterns yet with the whole post-death thing. Not in blood types, and not in what month it is. I'm still looking into it, though.

Mm-hmm. I've heard that it's, well. Not uncommon to die? But if I died, I'd worry about what was happening to my kittens and to Carmilla without me. And what would happen to Moonlight. [she gestures to a small, short-haired black kitten riding on her shoulder.

it's appreciated, but she's genuinely worried about the possibility of dying and her kitties and batcat being left to fend for themselves without her. she hasn't seen any mice, but that didn't mean there weren't any]

That's got to be frustrating. Would you like me to help? Two are better than one.

I'm sure someone would look after them for you, wouldn't they?

[Is Carmilla a cat as well? Willow's not sure, but she smiles at the shoulder kitten.]

Oh, you don't have to help - I know you've got your own thing you're looking into too. We could sit together, though, if you want? It sounds like we're both kind of looking into similar things, maybe we could help each other?

I hope so? They would need looking after, especially Carmilla. She's, well, she's a batkitten. And I'm not sure what would happen to Moonlight since she's my Omen.

[her culture reveres cats since cats were the only beings other than Bgztlians who could phase]

Okay, let's do that. Coming back from the dead back home had its consequences. Ones that I know I'll have to deal with someday, but I'd rather put it off as long as possible. Hopefully, one of these books will teach me how.

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(CW: death)

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