[He glances over at Shinji, or something in the shape of Shinji. There's nothing to be had there and yet...]
The real one. A chance to talk to him. And get answers to my questions. So perhaps what I really long for is a chance to do things differently. Or a chance for closure. To feel whole again. But I don't know if I want those things in that order, or what order they must be in, and if they're all even truly different things at all.
[He chews at his lip and gives a little shrug. Everything about him is trying very hard to be nonchalant instead of wobbly. It's easier with Paul here but... this is difficult. And it hurts. There's a certain strength in accepting there's nothing to be done here but there's also pain.
It feels unfair. Maybe he thought it would feel more rewarding right away to start to let go.]
no subject
[He glances over at Shinji, or something in the shape of Shinji. There's nothing to be had there and yet...]
The real one. A chance to talk to him. And get answers to my questions. So perhaps what I really long for is a chance to do things differently. Or a chance for closure. To feel whole again. But I don't know if I want those things in that order, or what order they must be in, and if they're all even truly different things at all.
[He chews at his lip and gives a little shrug. Everything about him is trying very hard to be nonchalant instead of wobbly. It's easier with Paul here but... this is difficult. And it hurts. There's a certain strength in accepting there's nothing to be done here but there's also pain.
It feels unfair. Maybe he thought it would feel more rewarding right away to start to let go.]