[ The answer, when it comes, is startling. Even Timcanpy isn't so much a voice in his head, a dialogue, but more like some instinctive and intuitive visceral understanding. Soulbonded. It's how they've always been, even when he was a golem in his world before with him. But hearing that quiet but strong sort of voice now, no, that's... it's her. It's definitely her. And he bites his lip for a moment at what she asks though, realizing how terribly loaded that question both is and the importance of an answer where... there is no real answer.
It makes his chest squeeze, but he does know his answer all too well. ]
Too many times... [ He murmurs it so gently, so sadly. ] Past when it feels like even your tears have finally dried up and you can't cry anymore. Past what anyone should have to bear. [ It's soft with regret. ]
But I think... as long as someone still has things that are important to them, they'll still be alright. As long as they still have something to live for and people they care about, they can overcome just about anything. [ Even their own heart being crushed. ]
Humans are resilient like that. No one's heart is entirely beyond saving, and I think the strongest ones are actually the gentlest ones. The ones that feel everything so painfully. [ He breathes out then, letting his eyes close for a moment and relaxing slightly at noticing that Todoroki seems to have warmed fully up by now and is indeed asleep. ]
Even if it takes a really long time...
[ Does he sound like he's talking from experience? Probably. Is his heart fractured? ... he doesn't think so. But it was broken apart over and over and over again so many times that it's beaten and misshapen and as full of scars as it is anything. Broke entirely with his mind for months when he turned Mana into an akuma and had to destroy the only person that had ever been kind to him... catatonic as a child and unable to eat, sleep, move from bed -- do anything other than scream from the pain of his curse mark or clutch his knees in a disassociated terror and wet the bed. And he was never the same after, his master had only coaxed him out of it finally, a season later, by pointing out he should remember the good of Mana.
So he did. And took that persona on entirely as his own in order to keep him alive that way. And he knew he buried his own self entirely to do so, he actually did... and it's why Cross pissed him off when he called him out on still wearing that "mask". But the point was... his heart was shattered. But his love for Mana let him glue it back together, even if badly and in a pretty unhealthy way. His love for the akuma and wanting to save them let him soothe it by finding meaning again. Finally making friends and finding a home, albeit briefly -- it felt like something in him was finally healing and that mask finally started slipping.
And then he lost the only other man to ever care for and raise him. And then he was cast out of his home as an enemy, he was responsible for the deaths of friends because he couldn't understand or control the monsters inside of him, ruined their lives and broke their own hearts in the process -- and then he lost Tim. He lost everything. He was even losing himself and everything he'd ever stood for. His tears finally dried up and something in him just... went snap.
It snapped, and he still doesn't know where it left him other than somewhere fatalistic.
But now he's here, and... feels warm. Because even after all of that, it's possible to still feel warmed by other. To feel happy; to smile. Even when it's sometimes just over the smallest things. To want to pursue onward and continue to live for the things you love and protect them: to still love, period. It's something. It's about always trying to heal, even if just a little at a time.
So yes. He believes in the strength of the human heart above all else.
no subject
It makes his chest squeeze, but he does know his answer all too well. ]
Too many times... [ He murmurs it so gently, so sadly. ] Past when it feels like even your tears have finally dried up and you can't cry anymore. Past what anyone should have to bear. [ It's soft with regret. ]
But I think... as long as someone still has things that are important to them, they'll still be alright. As long as they still have something to live for and people they care about, they can overcome just about anything. [ Even their own heart being crushed. ]
Humans are resilient like that. No one's heart is entirely beyond saving, and I think the strongest ones are actually the gentlest ones. The ones that feel everything so painfully. [ He breathes out then, letting his eyes close for a moment and relaxing slightly at noticing that Todoroki seems to have warmed fully up by now and is indeed asleep. ]
Even if it takes a really long time...
[ Does he sound like he's talking from experience? Probably. Is his heart fractured? ... he doesn't think so. But it was broken apart over and over and over again so many times that it's beaten and misshapen and as full of scars as it is anything. Broke entirely with his mind for months when he turned Mana into an akuma and had to destroy the only person that had ever been kind to him... catatonic as a child and unable to eat, sleep, move from bed -- do anything other than scream from the pain of his curse mark or clutch his knees in a disassociated terror and wet the bed. And he was never the same after, his master had only coaxed him out of it finally, a season later, by pointing out he should remember the good of Mana.
So he did. And took that persona on entirely as his own in order to keep him alive that way. And he knew he buried his own self entirely to do so, he actually did... and it's why Cross pissed him off when he called him out on still wearing that "mask". But the point was... his heart was shattered. But his love for Mana let him glue it back together, even if badly and in a pretty unhealthy way. His love for the akuma and wanting to save them let him soothe it by finding meaning again. Finally making friends and finding a home, albeit briefly -- it felt like something in him was finally healing and that mask finally started slipping.
And then he lost the only other man to ever care for and raise him. And then he was cast out of his home as an enemy, he was responsible for the deaths of friends because he couldn't understand or control the monsters inside of him, ruined their lives and broke their own hearts in the process -- and then he lost Tim. He lost everything. He was even losing himself and everything he'd ever stood for. His tears finally dried up and something in him just... went snap.
It snapped, and he still doesn't know where it left him other than somewhere fatalistic.
But now he's here, and... feels warm. Because even after all of that, it's possible to still feel warmed by other. To feel happy; to smile. Even when it's sometimes just over the smallest things. To want to pursue onward and continue to live for the things you love and protect them: to still love, period. It's something. It's about always trying to heal, even if just a little at a time.
So yes. He believes in the strength of the human heart above all else.
He has to. ]