Real & Half-Real: Chapter 1 - The Portal and the Plan

[unsheathedfromreality]

Who: The Committee to Rescue Illarion from His Very Stupid Mistake
What: Building a portal to bust into a pocket dimension and strategizing what to do once they get there. All extremely advisable science.
When: Early-mid April
Where: Throughout Trench, and in parts beyond it

It's been weeks since Illarion's disappearance in the fight against Leviathan, and scarcely fewer weeks since his Omen Iskierka began papering Trench with notes on his whereabouts. The shrike's friends and loved ones have not been idle during that time, and now their plans begin coming to fruition.

It's time to get him out of the nightmare he's trapped in--but first, they've got to break their way in, and they've got to have a plan.

[[ Part of the Real & Half-Real player plot! Navigate to other plot posts: [OOC] Interest Check | [IC] Prologue | [IC] Iskierka's Notes ]]

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Target Plans (a murder most fowl)

[peripheries]

So who's going to kill who and how?

[Look at who's unusually business today despite the topic. Well, come on, let's ~discuss~.]

[wannasmash]

Midoriya has been quiet for most of the proceedings, partly out of respect as someone not in the planning stage, and partly because there is a lot of information he needs to take in. He looks at Kaworu and Paul, two friends he desperately wishes a kinder life on. Illarion he knows little about, other than a small but warm show of sympathy, Sayo even less. He says quietly,

"I'm aware this is kind of like a mindscape, and I've looked at the notes. But do we have to kill them?"

[peripheries]

"Those are the conditions the Old Man explained to us. It's not like they're real even when we kill them."

[terriblepurpose]

Paul is fiddling with a pinkish folded paper bird when Deku speaks, no larger than the pad of his thumb. It disappears from his hand like a trick when he looks up, secreted up his sleeve.

"And you don't have to kill anyone," he says, quietly. "Even though they're only memories."

[wannasmash]

"Pretty sure the strategy is we have to kill them," he replies in the same quiet tone. It's worse than any loud protest he could have shown. We. He's on this mission too. Helping out, whether he deals the final blow or not, is being a part of that. He's obstinate in not looking away from that or either of his friends' eyes.

[peripheries]

"So it will be faster if you do. Your quirk is powerful. Maybe you can figure out how to make it painless."

Kaworu's expression and tone aren't angry or pleading. It's decidedly a restrained persona that he's adopted. Because he needs to, he can feel the corruption swirling inside of him and it rises in this place and when he thinks about the Old Man and how he's been unfairly taken from Kaworu. So instead, he just focuses on the mission at hand.

[terriblepurpose]

"That's assuming they feel pain." Paul murmurs. "They may appear to, but we can't know that they do, or that they have an internal self the way that we do."

He wants to have the note back in his hand, but he resists the urge.

[wannasmash]

Is that his fate? If he's headed for a future that bloody...

The words of his mother concerned him at the time, but it's not himself he thinks about now. He looks at the spot where Paul has slipped his paper away. (It's not good when Paul of all people fidgets. He wants to take his hand, but this is a conversation of steel.)

He leans forward in his seat. He's well aware Kaworu saw battle before his time in Trench. He remembers the first conversation he and All Might had about All For One a year ago. He accepted everything without question. Midoriya did not expect Paul to be carefully picking apart questions of morality like petals. Is it for Midoriya's sake? His own?

"You don't need to..." he starts saying to Paul, then stops, not sure how to put it into words. "Killing is killing. It means someone who couldn't be saved. I don't want that kind of cruel world for either of you. They might just be memories, but I don't want you to forget yourselves."

He briefly curls his left hand into a crescent and crooks his thumb and ring fingers, just as Paul showed him. He can't otherwise reference the circumstances he learned it under.

[peripheries]

"The real world is cruel. And we're entering a world built on cruelty instead of simply having cruelty within it. It's built on hatred and misery and the Old Man... Merlinus... is trapped there. If we aren't prepared to do what needs to be done, we won't be able to save him."

There was a time where Kaworu would have said these words with a smile. It would be funny to him that someone is so ignorant of the state of the world when, if one simply steps back, they could see it clearly for what it was. But humans were never interested in seeing themselves as small.

But this time, his face is serious, stony enough to even be called grim. His fingernails dig into the table that he leans idly against, the attempt at the casual posture he usually exudes completely forgotten.

[terriblepurpose]

Paul lingers on the crook of Midoriya's hand, his face as carefully neutral as the moral position it seems he's slipping into here. He can't let his longing betray him.

He'd been able to change that dream. He wasn't able to change the ones that followed. He doesn't think he can change this one, not in the way Midoriya wants.

"If there are alternatives, we can take them," he says, shifting his attention to Kaworu's tensed hands, another kind of sign, "But some people won't let themselves be saved."

There's a quietness to how he says it that edges towards hollow.

"Even if they would...the world they'd be saved in isn't going to last. If we spend our time there trying to save people who aren't real, we risk the people who are, and for what? A few more hours of false existence?"

[wannasmash]

There has been no light in his eyes since he brought up this topic. Midoriya is less like someone searching and more like someone double-checking, quietly pulling out old thoughts and memories from home and putting them into place like the notes on display.

"I know that's what the rules say... But I can't settle for that without trying. I want to save lives, not take them. If someone refuses help, but they still need it, I give it."

He treated people in memories in December as real, up to a point. He knew they were illusions, but he also knew they meant something. He just wanted to show a better way to the people whose memories he'd blundered into.

"I won't risk any of us. It's not... it's not these ghosts I'm worried about..."

Midoriya's eyes soften briefly for the first time as he looks at his friends. He doesn't mind that Kaworu might think he isn't prepared or that he has not seen the world's cruelty. Sayo isn't the only one who hasn't been forthcoming with everyone in this room. He leaves his seat and bends to whisper in Kaworu's ear. Paul is the only other one close enough to hear.

"Maybe killing is the only way. I don't know what I'm going to do, but don't worry. Either way, I won't hesitate. We'll save Anon-san, your Old Man."

[peripheries]

The soft words were enough to weaken his walls and the soft tone so close to his ear makes a complete crack. Kaworu knows that Midoriya wants to save people, can save people, and perhaps it's hard to stomach because there's a small part of him that wants to believe in a world where children can be saved from their predetermined fates.

He sniffs and turns away, reaching up to rub at his tired eyes, with an exhale, trying to see if his voice will shake when he tries to speak. Finally, he finds his voice, but it's quieter, deeper than usual.

"If you can't... If you don't want to kill anyone and it needs to be done, I'll do it for you. Then your hands are still clean."

[terriblepurpose]

Paul watches two of the people he likes best in this world come together in duty bound misery, and there is a suspended moment where he thinks about how young they both look. It's a strange thought he shakes off as quickly as he can, because they're all of an age, and that age is old enough.

(But he liked it better when they were on the couch, making promises they couldn't keep.)

"I don't think that's what he means," Paul says, after the moment has passed, slipping closer to them and setting his hand on the back of Kaworu's neck. "It's more...it's about not losing ourselves, isn't it?"

He looks up at Midoriya with the question, searching for affirmation that he's puzzled it out.

"Even if it's not real. It's about behaving in ways we can accept, afterwards."

[wannasmash]

He wants so badly to gently (fiercely) wrap his arms around them. Instead of risking shattering their brittle steel in front of others without permission, he draws up and moves slightly to shield Kaworu's face from any prying eyes. He continues to whisper,

"Back in your world, you were... taught for a specific reason. You're not the first person I've met like that. You don't have to do things the way you've always been told. You can make a better life."

He doesn't look at Paul in assent for fear of speaking his secrets with eyes already trembling like leaves. He closes and opens them, and they return to appearing placid and barren. The words are for him too.

"Don't worry about me. I chose this. I won't let you make the call I'm supposed to. It's not fair. The world isn't fair. Heroes fix that."

[peripheries]

"There are worlds where heroes don't exist. I think we are entering one of those."

Kaworu's tone is quiet and gets softer as he leans into Paul's hand on his neck, desperate for contact. There's no frustration in his voice, no condescension, like Midoriya should understand this but he's too foolish. Instead, it's quiet, resigned.

There are children in many worlds with predetermined fates and no one ever came to save them.

"And this isn't about me. It's about the Old Man. I'll be fine."

[terriblepurpose]

Paul draws a circle with his thumb just under the fringe of Kaworu's hair. It's only the proximity of others that keeps him from bending down to press his forehead to the shorter boy's temple, close enough he'd likely bump against Midoriya as well.

He understands what Midoriya is not saying to him directly. He's grateful for the restraint. It's not going to be a secret much longer, as much as it ever was.

"It's going to be all right," he says, in smooth, cool assurance for both of them, "We all know what we're doing. It's good we talked about it. We can count on each other to do what needs to be done, whatever it ends up being."

He considers telling them more. How he's practiced violence in his dreams, the way he knows the punctured weight of a body on the end of a knife, but that wouldn't make either of them feel any better. It doesn't make him feel any better, either. It only makes him feel tired.

"And we'll remind each other we don't have to be as bad as the world is to beat it. All right?"

[wannasmash]

cw: self-harm mention

"All right," he says at normal volume, still quiet but resolute. "Plenty of places and people a hero can't reach. There is one here, now, who can."

He curls a hand on each of their shoulders, up towards Paul's, down towards Kaworu's. He's midway between both their heights. Midoriya lets them feel the warm weight of his hands in the same way Paul lets them hear a perfect, soothing reassurance in his voice. Midoriya can almost believe it. Perhaps Paul even does, which makes it true. Instead, Midoriya remembers Paul's fidgeting and, further back, the stricken look on his face just before he jabbed himself with a pin. Midoriya already believes--has always believed--Paul is someone who, at the very least, was trained to take a life.

"Iskierka-san told me that what Anon-san needs is his people, his flock. After this is all over, you need to be there for him. That's also part of saving him. I don't think Anon-san would want you to hurt your heart. So if it becomes too much, know that you can turn back if you need to. I'll see it through."

[peripheries]

"I'm not turning back. I wouldn't- I'm doing this. Whatever it takes. I'm not afraid. I've done more than you know."

Kaworu ducks out of Midoriya's kind grip and away from Paul's affectionate one. He makes his way, footsteps unusually heavy, over to the board where all of the Old Man's notes are posted. He reaches out to smooth out the creases in a particular note in an attempt at self-soothing.

It's not Midoriya's fault, he knows. He means well and would do anything to protect the hearts of his friends. But... he wasn't there on the beach. He didn't hear the Old Man try to beg and bargain for a life to a creature drowned out the idea of mercy centuries ago.

People keep telling him it's not his fault. Yet, he still can't shake the feeling. It haunts him, seeping into the corners of his mind like dark tides at midnight.

[terriblepurpose]

When Kaworu pulls away from them, Paul looks to Midoriya in half-helpless appeal, as if the other boy might pull some trick out of his sleeve to resolve this. He's better at this than Paul is, steadier and gentler, full of advice from a world where the ideal of a hero is inspirational.

He slips out from underneath the comfort of Midoriya's hand reluctantly, inclining his head to invite him to follow after as he trails in Kaworu's footsteps. He can't read the note clearly at the distance and angle he stops at, his hands folded behind his back, but he knows what it says. He could recreate this board in his sleep. Sometimes he does.

"...if I tell you that you'll climb a mountain, does that put you at its peak?" Philosophy. The last resort of people without anything better to say, or so Gurney might tell him - usually before or after the old man spoke of philosophy. "Or does the climb still stand before you, in all its challenge? No one is doubting what you can do. Either of you."

He glances back at Midoriya with that. There's an undertone of certainty to how he says it that suggests if anyone were to try to change that no one who doubts them, Paul is prepared to make a pointedly persuasive case.

[justoscar]

"This seems like a situation where breaking into teams would be the quickest way to do it,"

Oscar chimed in, wary but attentive. He had been quiet up until this point-- and, given the fragments of information he understood about many parties involved, he knew this wasn't his fight.

But, he had a promise to keep... And for a creampuff he wasn't half bad at strategy.

"It's just pooling our resources and seeing who goes where. Unfortunately, I'm not exactly a front lines guy-- and it looks like a few of us are in that category. We're going to have to get creative."

[peripheries]

"I agree. So we need to figure out how to form the teams and.. who wants to go where."

He huffs, he can't think of easy configurations. Strategy has never really been his strong suit, he was used to following directions more than anything.

"I want to kill Preservation and Domnika."

[justoscar]

Those were high aspirations-- and for a moment Oscar was taken aback by the sheer intensity that all but radiated off of Kaworu. His Paleblood senses were highly sensitized after recent incidents which he shall not discuss.

The fact that his theft from the locked study had kickstarted a wild string of affairs that included Oscar being ejected from his body and in the space between dreams once more was both unsettling and embarrassing. No one unnecessary needed to know about his limited ability to be polite with his newfound telepathic abilities and beyond.

That, and he barely knew Kaworu beyond terrible allergies and being picky with food. There was something more, and he recognized that.

After all, wasn't Oscar himself similar?

"I feel like I need to be on the airship... But everything I'm hearing about Domnika reminds me of someone I met before."

Someone with limpid black eyes and a sweet smile-- both of which could turn more brutal than the unending cold at the bottom of the ocean in an instant.

"I know it doesn't apply... But having some kind of insight must be worth something."

[peripheries]

"We are likely to rely on the airship to travel. If the world is shifting and expanding as Sayo said then it's the only thing that can make us move fast enough until we find something else. Which, we should so we can split up."

The airship... that's a detail that he's not focused on. It's part of the background to him. Something that he knows will be there and he finds little reason to think of it more.

Then he glances up, red eyes darker than usual. "Oh, and what might that be?"

[justoscar]

"manipulation."

He said the word slowly, carefully enunciating the syllables to make them clear. That was the true common denominator with all of the people he has struggled against-- they were either manipulating the board or being manipulated by others.

"She may try a divide and conquer method. I... I've seen kingdoms fall to that tactic."

There was no uncertainty in his tone as he spoke. Rather, there were hints of something more that he couldn't contain, like grief and regret.

"If we can figure out the rules to her game, we can probably beat her."

[hearthebell]

My omen is an apex predator adapted to cold climates; that remains true in dreams, so I can only assume that however the trip affects her, those are dependable properties we can rely on. I imagine Kel would give her less trouble than most if she's assisting, so she could at least cover for whoever wants to take on the glacier-lich, or handle some of the chimeras on the front line.