Real & Half-Real: Chapter 1 - The Portal and the Plan

[unsheathedfromreality]

Who: The Committee to Rescue Illarion from His Very Stupid Mistake
What: Building a portal to bust into a pocket dimension and strategizing what to do once they get there. All extremely advisable science.
When: Early-mid April
Where: Throughout Trench, and in parts beyond it

It's been weeks since Illarion's disappearance in the fight against Leviathan, and scarcely fewer weeks since his Omen Iskierka began papering Trench with notes on his whereabouts. The shrike's friends and loved ones have not been idle during that time, and now their plans begin coming to fruition.

It's time to get him out of the nightmare he's trapped in--but first, they've got to break their way in, and they've got to have a plan.

[[ Part of the Real & Half-Real player plot! Navigate to other plot posts: [OOC] Interest Check | [IC] Prologue | [IC] Iskierka's Notes ]]

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[wannasmash]

He wants so badly to gently (fiercely) wrap his arms around them. Instead of risking shattering their brittle steel in front of others without permission, he draws up and moves slightly to shield Kaworu's face from any prying eyes. He continues to whisper,

"Back in your world, you were... taught for a specific reason. You're not the first person I've met like that. You don't have to do things the way you've always been told. You can make a better life."

He doesn't look at Paul in assent for fear of speaking his secrets with eyes already trembling like leaves. He closes and opens them, and they return to appearing placid and barren. The words are for him too.

"Don't worry about me. I chose this. I won't let you make the call I'm supposed to. It's not fair. The world isn't fair. Heroes fix that."

[peripheries]

"There are worlds where heroes don't exist. I think we are entering one of those."

Kaworu's tone is quiet and gets softer as he leans into Paul's hand on his neck, desperate for contact. There's no frustration in his voice, no condescension, like Midoriya should understand this but he's too foolish. Instead, it's quiet, resigned.

There are children in many worlds with predetermined fates and no one ever came to save them.

"And this isn't about me. It's about the Old Man. I'll be fine."

[terriblepurpose]

Paul draws a circle with his thumb just under the fringe of Kaworu's hair. It's only the proximity of others that keeps him from bending down to press his forehead to the shorter boy's temple, close enough he'd likely bump against Midoriya as well.

He understands what Midoriya is not saying to him directly. He's grateful for the restraint. It's not going to be a secret much longer, as much as it ever was.

"It's going to be all right," he says, in smooth, cool assurance for both of them, "We all know what we're doing. It's good we talked about it. We can count on each other to do what needs to be done, whatever it ends up being."

He considers telling them more. How he's practiced violence in his dreams, the way he knows the punctured weight of a body on the end of a knife, but that wouldn't make either of them feel any better. It doesn't make him feel any better, either. It only makes him feel tired.

"And we'll remind each other we don't have to be as bad as the world is to beat it. All right?"

[wannasmash]

cw: self-harm mention

"All right," he says at normal volume, still quiet but resolute. "Plenty of places and people a hero can't reach. There is one here, now, who can."

He curls a hand on each of their shoulders, up towards Paul's, down towards Kaworu's. He's midway between both their heights. Midoriya lets them feel the warm weight of his hands in the same way Paul lets them hear a perfect, soothing reassurance in his voice. Midoriya can almost believe it. Perhaps Paul even does, which makes it true. Instead, Midoriya remembers Paul's fidgeting and, further back, the stricken look on his face just before he jabbed himself with a pin. Midoriya already believes--has always believed--Paul is someone who, at the very least, was trained to take a life.

"Iskierka-san told me that what Anon-san needs is his people, his flock. After this is all over, you need to be there for him. That's also part of saving him. I don't think Anon-san would want you to hurt your heart. So if it becomes too much, know that you can turn back if you need to. I'll see it through."

[peripheries]

"I'm not turning back. I wouldn't- I'm doing this. Whatever it takes. I'm not afraid. I've done more than you know."

Kaworu ducks out of Midoriya's kind grip and away from Paul's affectionate one. He makes his way, footsteps unusually heavy, over to the board where all of the Old Man's notes are posted. He reaches out to smooth out the creases in a particular note in an attempt at self-soothing.

It's not Midoriya's fault, he knows. He means well and would do anything to protect the hearts of his friends. But... he wasn't there on the beach. He didn't hear the Old Man try to beg and bargain for a life to a creature drowned out the idea of mercy centuries ago.

People keep telling him it's not his fault. Yet, he still can't shake the feeling. It haunts him, seeping into the corners of his mind like dark tides at midnight.

[terriblepurpose]

When Kaworu pulls away from them, Paul looks to Midoriya in half-helpless appeal, as if the other boy might pull some trick out of his sleeve to resolve this. He's better at this than Paul is, steadier and gentler, full of advice from a world where the ideal of a hero is inspirational.

He slips out from underneath the comfort of Midoriya's hand reluctantly, inclining his head to invite him to follow after as he trails in Kaworu's footsteps. He can't read the note clearly at the distance and angle he stops at, his hands folded behind his back, but he knows what it says. He could recreate this board in his sleep. Sometimes he does.

"...if I tell you that you'll climb a mountain, does that put you at its peak?" Philosophy. The last resort of people without anything better to say, or so Gurney might tell him - usually before or after the old man spoke of philosophy. "Or does the climb still stand before you, in all its challenge? No one is doubting what you can do. Either of you."

He glances back at Midoriya with that. There's an undertone of certainty to how he says it that suggests if anyone were to try to change that no one who doubts them, Paul is prepared to make a pointedly persuasive case.

[wannasmash]

He thought Paul might look at him like that, like he has the answers. He doesn't want him to. He doesn't want him to quote philosophy like Midoriya sometimes quotes All Might. Not yet, even if the words are apt and right and true. Midoriya waits. He grew up around people (one person) who refused offered comfort. Other people he knows are less extreme in this, but sometimes they need a few moments alone to settle.

Midoriya doesn't read the note, though he knows which it is for its distinctive single line compared to lengthy others. It has drawn his eye before. Instead he reads Kaworu's silence accompanied by the soft crinkle of paper. Only when it and Paul's words smooth away does he approach. He stops where Paul is.

("...it's to kill Angels," Kaworu had said matter-of-factly of a giant robot--a war machine--weeks ago, in the same way he explained his upbringing to Midoriya in December as they healed in the relative safety of natural hot springs.)

Kaworu doesn't need to prove anything, least of all his conviction or all-too-human pain of loss. Iskierka told Midoriya that Kaworu is part of a flock.

"I'm trying to say you're not alone," he says lowly. "We're here."

His sleeve rustles softly as he holds his scarred hand out to Kaworu palm up.

[peripheries]

"I know."

They're here for him. He knows that. And he's happy for it but... he's also afraid. Afraid of what might happen in there, the things they'll see, and the things that will force their hands.

He turns and gently puts his small pale hand into Midoriya's, slender fingers embraced by firm ones. Then he reaches out and takes Paul's with a familiarity that doesn't require any offering. He knows Midoriya's heart is pure. Too pure, maybe, but that impossible purity draws him ever nearer.

"But I am prepared to do whatever it takes and... a conflict between us would be a distraction to our goal of saving the old man." He raises his head and gives Midoriya a look, it's dull-eyed and pleading. "So please, let's not get in each other's way, regardless of methods."

[terriblepurpose]

Paul weaves his fingers through Kaworu into a lattice, stronger together than apart, and it eases some of the pressured tension in him. His shoulderblades slide down and back as he half-steps closer.

"I trust you both," Paul tells them, with the steady intensity they know well by now. He isn't someone who says that lightly, the circle of those he trusts a small and select one.

Once someone is close, he always wants to keep them.

"It's like we said. We protect each other. That includes the old man." Paul edges closer, despite his keen awareness of other people in the room, unable to help a frown at Kaworu's troubled expression. He wants to brush it away with gentle touches, nestle him against his chest - with Midoriya too, while he's at it.

[wannasmash]

Paul's kindness is the quality in him Midoriya admires most. It grew in inhospitable conditions like impossibly composite wild lichen or the produce Raleigh painstakingly cultivates out of this hard land. It's what turned Paul from someone who needed help into someone Midoriya could call a friend. It draws Paul's feet closer here, and Midoriya understands the pull.

It's the type thing that makes Kaworu cut through his friends' nervousness and toss it aside. It fuels Midoriya's defiance against the rules of his own world, this world, and the one waiting for them. It surfaces, just for an instant, as a flash of challenge in his eyes as Kaworu's somber ones ask him for help, but the heat isn't directed at him. His hand gives his a reassuring squeeze.

This is important. It's probably the most important thing Midoriya will do today, but there are other important things too. Midoriya might be in civvies, but he's essentially at work. They're discussing a rescue with a team of people who don't all know each other. The others may not understand the secure but gentle press of Midoriya's scarred hand against Kaworu's or the concern drawn on Paul's brows. They may, however, understand the low efficiency in Midoriya's voice.

"I won't put us in danger with infighting." Something he saw happen during his provisional licensing exam. Good thing it was only an exam. "A Hero can't be a liability. The rescue will always be my top priority. We should finish the meeting. Or do you guys want to take a break?"