[July catchall] There's no safe place, no sanctuary

[ezra_of_lothal]

Who: Ezra Bridger ezra_of_lothal and you!
What: a july catch-all with various semi-open starts
When: Post-boatgate, mid Chara's rampage, and the rest of the month
Where:  Centered around Cassandra, but could be anywhere 

Content Warnings: Violent death, grief, hauntings. May be updated here and have cws in thread subject lines

Comments

[jedies]

[ a quiet nod. ]

I know that too. When something like this happens, the urge to . . . downplay is overwhelming.

[ezra_of_lothal]

Yeah.

But we can't....process, without honesty. To ourselves, at the very least.

[jedies]

That is usually the case, yes.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[Light and warm-]

Not telling the Jedi Master anything new, I know.

[jedies]

When you get to my age, you'll feel the same way.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[Amused-]

Like the young 'uns just go around saying the obvious?

[jedies]

Or young 'uns saying things since the beginning, that all youths say.

You don't think I never did the same?

[ezra_of_lothal]

...Huh. It's not that I haven't considered what Padawan Kenobi was like.

[Between a few stories and flickers of memory from the sharing, he's not completely clueless.]

Hadn't considered it enough to ponder that aspect, maybe.

[jedies]

It's not the easiest thing to imagine.

[ but some insecurities are eternal, so to speak. ]

[ezra_of_lothal]

Hmmm. So which bits?

Downplaying, even when it's dumb? Being a little cranky when feel like your master's playing up mysterious? Condescendingly lecturing like you're the adult here?

[Yes, he is completely making fun of himself, but there's not really a vicious edge to it.]

[jedies]

[ obi-wan looks bemused. ]

I had Qui-Gon Jinn as a master. What do you think?

[ezra_of_lothal]

[He laughs brightly.]

Well, how I should I know? There's a reason I asked you for a Master Jinn story that time.

[He ponders the little bits he knows, briefly.]

He could be a headache and half sometimes, couldn't he?

[jedies]

Oh, absolutely. Hard-headed and incredibly stubborn. He makes me look quite easy-going in comparison.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[He gives Obi-wan a mild Look, tinged with love.]

You really are, most of the time, in my experience.

But I can see how you might, um, have set each other off occasionally?

[jedies]

It evened out, in time. It is always a little fractious at the start.

[ezra_of_lothal]

Yeah, Kanan and I had some of that going on. I wasn't used to learning from someone else; he wasn't used to teaching. There was some yelling at times.

[His expression turns bittersweet, tinged with lingering insecurity]

Unfocused. Undisciplined. [Kanan isn't the only one called Ezra those things.]

[jedies]

Yes, I can imagine it to be . . . rather rocky at the start.

[ezra_of_lothal]

We learned some stuff together. It got better.

[jedies]

Of course it did.

It always does.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[He raised an eyebrow, a little skeptical of the 'always'.]

With time, and work, and trust.

[jedies]

Yes, and commitment.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[He smiles.]

True. I thought that was implied, with the rest.

[jedies]

Perhaps. I would say it is key, though. Commitment is what we need to devote time and energy and trust.

[ezra_of_lothal]

That's fair.

[A bear of silence.]

I'm going to try to find a way back fully. As soon as I can. As long as it doesn't hurt anyone. [ He ponders a moment more.]

More than a sacrifice that both I and the other people who might help are freely willing to accept.

[jedies]

[ obi-wan lets out a quiet breath. ]

All right.