He remembers the endless stretch of sky above the low cloud cover, the tall cumulonimbus towers, and the blinding rays of the sun against distant dots of sky pthumerians. That was his first flight with Falco, and despite the danger they were in, it was breathtaking.
He remembers when All Might told him about Sir Nighteye's vision, and he emphatically refused to let it come to pass.
"There must be something we can do..."
He can't hold it in any longer. He was always too much like his mom. Very gently he wraps his arms around Falco's shoulders and begins to sob.
[ falco is mindful of the contact. he still has vileblood staining him, even if it has either dried or smeared with his hand or the cloth. nevertheless— it’s hard not to receive the now teen’s body around his. in his cold sweat, falco holds his breath, turns his head in the opposite for safety’s sake and gives a comforting embrace in turn.
this didn’t come as a surprise for him. he’s been waiting for it, for thirteen years. most of his friends and newfound family were still learning about it. falco’s arms were larger, longer— so he easily surrounds izuku and is sure to cup his head from behind his neck.
a big brother in law has become a little brother. he knows that the way colt and paul have always hugged him always kept him feeling safe. ]
Not for me. [ it was a sad truth that he speaks with apology, soft and slow in execution so it isn’t as cruel as it was. ] Hey, but maybe— there’s still a way for the Falco you still know. The little guy.
[ but “little” falco is gaining some height over the last year . . . hah. ]
He takes care not to smother Falco, knowing he isn't feeling his best (and hasn't been for a while). For someone who is overly careful of intruding on others' space, Midoriya fits easily once invited in. His mom was always affectionate with him. That is the language he knows how to show to those close to him.
"He's not so little." His small laugh is choked by a sob. Just another reminder of time running out...
"I wish there was something I could do. But this is so far out of my experience. You know more than me about medicine."
[ just another comment against the folds of clothes in this rocking, stroking embrace to calm one of his brothers. it is the least and only thing he could do. and maybe, well— not the only thing.
falco lived by and perpetuated love. it’s the one thing that he would always give, even to an enemy. when he lifts himself away, he’s sure to dry the teen’s tears with something that wasn’t already stained with blood. sitting on the feathers for a little bit, before it all breaks down, was malleable. ]
I think I started looking into it too late. Or maybe I didn’t tell the right people to help me. [ he doesn’t know what it was. ] But this world is so big, with so many possibilities. I want to think that . . . We just have to look in the right places.
Long like a worm. Falco does the new House Atreides proud. Midoriya's scarred hand plucks uselessly at a thread near a seam in Falco's shirt.
"There's... there's places we haven't yet explored. This one, but also around Trench. Like Paul-kun with his fungi. This world looks dead, but it's actually really alive."
He sniffles. It's a faint hope. There's also magic of course, but Midoriya's conception of magic is that it has its limits like Quirks. Recovery Girl can only stimulate the body's natural healing process, not remove stable ailments, and Eri's Rewind Quirk is dangerous enough to rewind someone into nothing.
"Was there ever a time when you didn't have this problem? Or were you born with it?"
[ the world is alive. it brings a smile to falco’s face that has gone to wide open skies and vast plains. it gave him hope that someone thought that way.
trench had its own, special hell, but those were challenges. it was safe to say that he had made trench a home he loved because of the people in it.
the thought helps bring the rest of his words out with less weight. ]
I was born healthy. It would’ve stayed that way, I guess, [ he lifts his arm when he’s finally able, a shake in his fingers still as he taps the saw-tooth scars lining his jaws and cheeks. they looked like imprints right off of the bone-beak mask his titan wears. ] if I’d never inherited any of this.
Talking about the fungi Paul runs off to look at reminds Midoriya of Falco's fossil caves. Will Falco be reduced to a mere memory, just a too-young imprint in the ground?
"When you were selected to inherit the titan as an emergency?"
Midoriya isn't a biologist or a doctor, but it's one of the distinctions those experts make when talking about diseases: whether they're genetic or come about later. And, in a different way, Midoriya knows a thing or two about the difference between inheriting a Quirk and being given one.
An accident. Well . . . It was an emergency for the person responsible, but an accident that I got involved.
[ it was hard to say, and after the fact that falco has already spoken, he looks a little divided. he understood zeke. he just wanted to protect his own brother— and killed another's in the process because he was that kind of person. ]
And it's difficult to say I regret it. A dear friend would've died if I hadn't . . . Taken a blow for her. [ and by the time they figured out he'd accidentally ingested spiked wine, well. too late for that. ] The rest was just a matter of the wrong people being with me at the wrong time.
Midoriya loosens the hug to look at him properly, scarred hands gently resting on his shoulders. Even when describing something horrible happening at the hands of other people, accidental or not, Falco tries to understand the reasoning behind it.
"Falco-kun... I don't know if you'll remember this when you become small again, but you're not alone here. You have a chance of being surrounded by the right people this time. You're such a kind person, and you make friends easily. We can look out for you, okay?"
[ all he could do was feel something swell so greaty within that water bubbles at the corners of his eyes too quickly, enough that he quickly pushed his tinted tears away. he's not ashamed of them, and he was always an emotional person. it's just—
it always gets him. he nods one too many times to gather the reassurance into his arms and never let go of it. even past his deathbed, this will carry on to the boy before him, who may have a chance to grow differently. ]
Let's— Let's get down from here. The titan's going to break down, soon.
Falco is so good and kind-hearted. Midoriya isn't embarrassed to see him cry so close, but he does lower his large eyes briefly to give him a moment (and to blink away his own tears). Midoriya's mother never shamed him for his tears, being a crybaby herself. Midoriya was going to be made fun of at school either way, so he made no effort to project a tough persona.
He rubs Falco's shoulders comfortingly, as he might have done when Falco was small, and it feels strange to do it now when Falco looks like and is an adult. But adults need comfort too.
He shifts and rises, offering Falco his arm.
"I don't need to do anything with it, do I? I want to look after you..."
[ sometimes, it's all someone could really do and all someone really needs. even as he cries, falco can feel warmth pouring through a smile when he feels izuku there for him. one of the kindest hearts he's had the pleasure of knowing in his life. he'll never forget him. a selfish part of himself hopes he's never forgotten, either. ]
It'll evaporate by itself. [ and through the clap as he pulls himself up on his wobbling legs and so many feathers under them— ] So only if you let me look after you, too.
[ possibly literally just watch him. he really needs to rest. ]
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no subject
He remembers when All Might told him about Sir Nighteye's vision, and he emphatically refused to let it come to pass.
"There must be something we can do..."
He can't hold it in any longer. He was always too much like his mom. Very gently he wraps his arms around Falco's shoulders and begins to sob.
no subject
this didn’t come as a surprise for him. he’s been waiting for it, for thirteen years. most of his friends and newfound family were still learning about it. falco’s arms were larger, longer— so he easily surrounds izuku and is sure to cup his head from behind his neck.
a big brother in law has become a little brother. he knows that the way colt and paul have always hugged him always kept him feeling safe. ]
Not for me. [ it was a sad truth that he speaks with apology, soft and slow in execution so it isn’t as cruel as it was. ] Hey, but maybe— there’s still a way for the Falco you still know. The little guy.
[ but “little” falco is gaining some height over the last year . . . hah. ]
no subject
"He's not so little." His small laugh is choked by a sob. Just another reminder of time running out...
"I wish there was something I could do. But this is so far out of my experience. You know more than me about medicine."
no subject
[ just another comment against the folds of clothes in this rocking, stroking embrace to calm one of his brothers. it is the least and only thing he could do. and maybe, well— not the only thing.
falco lived by and perpetuated love. it’s the one thing that he would always give, even to an enemy. when he lifts himself away, he’s sure to dry the teen’s tears with something that wasn’t already stained with blood. sitting on the feathers for a little bit, before it all breaks down, was malleable. ]
I think I started looking into it too late. Or maybe I didn’t tell the right people to help me. [ he doesn’t know what it was. ] But this world is so big, with so many possibilities. I want to think that . . . We just have to look in the right places.
no subject
"There's... there's places we haven't yet explored. This one, but also around Trench. Like Paul-kun with his fungi. This world looks dead, but it's actually really alive."
He sniffles. It's a faint hope. There's also magic of course, but Midoriya's conception of magic is that it has its limits like Quirks. Recovery Girl can only stimulate the body's natural healing process, not remove stable ailments, and Eri's Rewind Quirk is dangerous enough to rewind someone into nothing.
"Was there ever a time when you didn't have this problem? Or were you born with it?"
no subject
trench had its own, special hell, but those were challenges. it was safe to say that he had made trench a home he loved because of the people in it.
the thought helps bring the rest of his words out with less weight. ]
I was born healthy. It would’ve stayed that way, I guess, [ he lifts his arm when he’s finally able, a shake in his fingers still as he taps the saw-tooth scars lining his jaws and cheeks. they looked like imprints right off of the bone-beak mask his titan wears. ] if I’d never inherited any of this.
no subject
"When you were selected to inherit the titan as an emergency?"
Midoriya isn't a biologist or a doctor, but it's one of the distinctions those experts make when talking about diseases: whether they're genetic or come about later. And, in a different way, Midoriya knows a thing or two about the difference between inheriting a Quirk and being given one.
no subject
[ it was hard to say, and after the fact that falco has already spoken, he looks a little divided. he understood zeke. he just wanted to protect his own brother— and killed another's in the process because he was that kind of person. ]
And it's difficult to say I regret it. A dear friend would've died if I hadn't . . . Taken a blow for her. [ and by the time they figured out he'd accidentally ingested spiked wine, well. too late for that. ] The rest was just a matter of the wrong people being with me at the wrong time.
no subject
"Falco-kun... I don't know if you'll remember this when you become small again, but you're not alone here. You have a chance of being surrounded by the right people this time. You're such a kind person, and you make friends easily. We can look out for you, okay?"
a wrap soon . . . ???
it always gets him. he nods one too many times to gather the reassurance into his arms and never let go of it. even past his deathbed, this will carry on to the boy before him, who may have a chance to grow differently. ]
Let's— Let's get down from here. The titan's going to break down, soon.
yes... 😢
He rubs Falco's shoulders comfortingly, as he might have done when Falco was small, and it feels strange to do it now when Falco looks like and is an adult. But adults need comfort too.
He shifts and rises, offering Falco his arm.
"I don't need to do anything with it, do I? I want to look after you..."
😭
It'll evaporate by itself. [ and through the clap as he pulls himself up on his wobbling legs and so many feathers under them— ] So only if you let me look after you, too.
[ possibly literally just watch him. he really needs to rest. ]