deercountry | open; february catch-all

[ vesper has never been one to keep track of locations. her artificial brain isn't structured like that; too hyper-specialized, too focused on the song all around her. but even with her nasty habit of getting lost, her tendency to not look at the map when she really needs to...

she's pretty sure she'd have remembered stepping into this. a room full of people she's never seen; an air of confusion, where am i and how did i get here and i'm not really into dating someone right now floating by in idle bits of signal. it's a bit overwhelming; she doesn't even realize until she's ushered into a chair that she's got a little nametag on her chestplate.

hello! my name is KLBR-S2302.

at least they got her designation correct??? ]

Um! Hello! [ she has absolutely no idea why she's here. this is a nightmare. ] I'm. Um. I'm Vesper, and it's... very nice to meet you?

[ to those prescient enough to check her out in the omni - or at least those who got here without being magically whisked away - you'll be treated to this gem of a profile: ]

KLBR-S2302

Come squeeze the cutest little thought-police unit in the Nation! With pale oxidant running through her artificial circulatory system and a polyethylene chassis that almost feels like a REAL PERSON'S skin, you can almost forget that she's just a copy! Likes: her clones, "singing," and intruding on your privacy. Dislikes: being asked to hold an opinion, free will, being alone for any length of time.

Remember: beneath the Red Eye's gaze, the red flags just look like flags!

( ~~venus~~ vesper | 3 | f | f/f unless contacted )

[ Battler also isn't quite sure what this is and where it came from, but... well. He's here. That's just how Trench is. He frowns and picks at the nametag he's wearing.

Hello! My name is Battler Ushiromiya!

Without much ado he's shoved into a chair himself and told to enjoy himself and have fun finding new love!

Wait, is this speed dating? Reminds him of a mixer, honestly. He's got his own profile, apparently. ]

Uh, hello! Hi, I guess. I'm Battler.

[ He flashes a smile. ]

Glad they put me with a cute girl to start.

BATTLER

Go ahead and say hello to one of the most eligible married men in Trench! He may or may not be dead, depending on who you ask, but he definitely has a penchant for drama, murderous intent, and witches! Thinks he's charming and maybe he's right. Likes: games, detective stories, witches, magic, cute girls Dislikes: High places, vehicles

( Battler Ushiromiya | 19 | M | M/F )

Murderbot holds up its omni to view the information on this—bot? it's not sure what exactly but something with a designation like KLBR-S2302—person opposite it and stares. A ThoughtPoliceUnit?! Is she going to read its thoughts? Murderbot hopes not because it's betting this event isn't meant to be murder.

"What's wrong with free will?" it demands, rather than asking Why do you think some sunsets are better than others?. Thankfully its name tag says Hello, my name is: Eden Rin.

UN: rin

Signature move: Netflix and chill. No metaphor.

( Eden Rin | 42 | female | aroace )

Oh! Hello. I'm Vesper? I. Think I already said that.

[ bad news, battler: the girl you've sat in front of is the type of android that can just look at you omni-style. the good news:

sorry, i lied. i'm not sure there's any good news? she's just a dork. ]

...wait, if you're married, why are you eligible?

Oh, Beato and I love each other a lot...

[ He smiles broadly. That's very true. ]

But we're... I don't know. We're kinda open a little? We have to talk about it.

[ Which is also true. Sort of. ]

[the amount of things that anna was not prepared for continues to grow. she is here, at a table, with vesper. and she very much would like to crawl into a hole and remain there until the troubles pass. her own profile is clear enough for others to see, but she is not going to read vesper's.]

[instead, she will lean forward, and she will calmly rest her forehead on the table.]

Vesper.

[ vesper watches anna lay down against the table, doing her absolute best to respect what she now understands as "anna's general state of existence." she doesn't pry into anna's song, but she does ambiently listen; she doesn't ask "are you okay," but she does reach out to falteringly pat anna's silver hair. ]

Anna. [ a beat. she could ask any number of questions, direct or intuitive or prying. instead, she looks to the suggestion on her omni and asks: ] Um... What's the first thing you think of when you wake up?

[ it's kainé. she is pretty sure she already knows that?? but it's a normal question and maybe anna could use that right now. ]

Open? [ that genuinely seems to confuse vesper - but only for a moment. ] Oh, like Anna and Kainé. Where there's... Room for a third? I think?

[ she's not sure how much of that she should know, truth be told. she's pieced it together through bits and pieces, little segments of song that she overhead from anna and kainé. memories of the girl that vesper came from in the first place.

it's only a few moments later when vesper visibly brightens and says- ]

-oh, wait! You know Beatrice! [ a beat. ] Wait, Beatrice is married??

Sorta. We have to discuss... what we want and how we want it, you know?

[ He waves a hand. Even if this girl seems odd... well, she's cute, isn't she? ]

...oh, you do know Beatrice? [ He brightens. ]

And yeah, of course she is. She's married to me!

[Why is he here. Why is this happening. What is speed dating. There's something stuck to his shirt, and when he plucks at it, it clings to the fabric. It has his name. In big blocky letters.]

[He tries to peel it off a couple times before he lifts his gaze to see the ... person? Construct? sitting across from him.]

Um. [What a great first impression.] M-Melius? I um. I'm. Melius.

[And likewise, his own profile pings to life. It's Magical.]

How to make it everyone else's problem.

[she puts both hands on the table and pushes herself up, then crosses her arms and props herself up on them while leaning forward. she looks exhausted, but that could in fact just be the way she normally looks. her back jolts, and she jumps, and when she realizes that she's not going to be able to get away with that kind of bullshit here even if it's a very funny joke, she sighs.]

It's K. [another shock, and this one surprises her even more genuinely.] It's K. [she insists it, and she only gets another, stronger shock.]

[she holds her breath. counts to five. lets it out.]

It's whether Kainé is still there, or if she's been sent back to the ocean. This already fucking sucks, V.

Oh. Huh? I thought it was-

[ anna jolts, and vesper jumps alongside her. ]

I'm. Wait, what- [ another jolt. vesper jumps, actually squeaking as she watched anna flinch. ] Wait! But that's not a lie, you shouldn't-

[ anna says the last bit, and this time there's no shock. vesper trembles in place - part bundled anxiety, part sympathy shocks, and part v was a nickname before she ever arrived. ]

I'm sorry! I thought it would be an easy question!!

Oh. I mean, that makes sense? I feel like it should, at least. I don't really know much about how relationships are supposed to work, so maybe I've got it wrong, but it seems like it would be most efficient if you're both kept up to date?

[ ah, wait. he's asking if she knows beatrice? she squints, trying to figure out the best way to put it. ]

I... A little? I didn't really get to know her very well-

[ a sudden zap from the chair beneath her. she squeaks, shaking her head and looking around. ]

-I didn't though?? [ another zap. this one actually sounds a bit painful. ] Um- I can't hear her singing, so I can't hear any of her memories?

[ no zap this time. after a moment, she visibly relaxes, exhaling deeply. looks like that one was honest enough. ]

It was an easy question. You see how easy it was for me to lie about it?

[she looks around the room towards the other "couples", wondering whether their conversations are going half as well. she returns to vesper's gaze—realizes she'd called her V anyway and fucking berates herself for it in her own head—then peers down to her omni like it's going to save her.]

Why do you think some sunsets are better than others? [she twists her face a little as she reads it, but she doesn't wanna get shocked again, so she'll just. play along, she guesses.]

Um.

[ that is a question she has genuinely never thought about. not even once. are sunsets even rankable? like, as an objective quality? after a moment, she recites what she knows to be true- ]

The aesthetic quality of one sunset makes it no different from any other. They all point to the same truth: another day forward for our glorious Nation.

[ -and immediately jerks up with a confused yelp. right. got it. point taken. ]

Maybe?? It depends on where you're looking from?? [ no zap comes just yet - but better to play it safe. ] I- I mean, if you're in a place where you're unhappy, then the sunset will probably look awful, but if you're in a place where you can be happy-

[ the words she's looking for finally dawn on her, and she stammers out- ]

-it's the people around you! When you look!!

Right. Melius. Got it.

[ her gaze doesn't deviate from melius, even as the profile's information washes over her. she stares directly at him. and then a bit longer. and then, slowly, with a great confusion, she asks: ]

That isn't a picture of you, is it?

[ it seems obvious. but also she has never seen something like him before, and she doesn't want to be rude? ]

Um. Hi. Yes. That - that is my name.

[He fidgets. With his claws. With the scales on his neck. What is he supposed to say? Or ask? He's supposed to ask questions. Right?]

[Fortunately, Vesper broaches the silence.]

[Unfortuately, Melius has no idea what she's talking about. He's not the most tech-savvy here okay.]

Wh-what isn't? I um. I don't know?

[ Battler blinks as she jumps. Huh, that's kinda weird. But hey, not gonna dig too much into it. At least not yet. ]

...you can see people's memories?

[ He seems relatively unphased by that. ]

How does that work?

[this is a fucking stupid thing. all of this. she needs some stupidity, she thinks, and maybe the world has listened to her, but she was expecting maybe something that made a little more sense alongside her... ostensible relaxation time. she listens to vesper's answer, but doesn't really glean anything from it, because the question was stupid. so she leaves her omni on the table and doesn't pick it back up.]

Christ, Vesper. Do you know how long it's been since I've dated? Since I've put myself out there trying to find somebody? [she looks down towards her seat with a scowl and shifts preemptively.] Because I don't think it's ever actually happened. I think people have just come to me and I've let them in. So I don't know what the hell I'm doing out here. I don't know how to have small talk with someone.

Hell, if I'm honest, I'm not totally sure I know how I ended up across the table from you right now.

No? I mean-

[ the chair zaps her. vesper doesn't even bother to hide her indignation, squirming in her chair as she tries to settle down. ]

-ow ow ow. Fine! Fine! Fourteen years! [ she hunkers down, preparing for a shock that doesn't come, then finally sits back up. ] Anna, I- I don't want to be rude, but-

[ another shock. it's smaller this time, at least, but it doesn't stop the angry squawk that escapes her. ]

-crap!! Why! Are you! Complaining about knowing how to talk?! [ she sounds... not quite angry, but something approaching it. it's a tone anna's probably heard before, from someone that shared a face with her. ] You're better at it than me! A lot better!

[and before anna can even think to answer, she's sputtering out something that isn't even words. her eye goes wide, and she can't focus on the pressure in her head that's gone as soon as she thinks about it for too long anyway.]

How do you kn—[oh, goddammit, did vesper ask a question?]—fuck, fuck, okay, chill out with the shocking already.

[she takes a look around the room again to see who the hell is in charge of this, but of course, nobody is there. there's absolutely no reprieve except to answer. and since it apparently has to be the truth, she continues, very much, to hate this.]

I'm not—[a phantom wince. fine. all right.] I'm not sure, okay? I can't talk about small shit without feeling awkward and I can't talk about big shit without hiding who I am and pretending I'm smarter and less obvious than I am. [she kicks her foot against the leg of her chair and grumbles down "satisfied, you little bitch?" at it before returning to vesper.] And how the hell did you know how long it's been since I dated?

This sucks. This really, really sucks. I think I hate dating?

[ and then anna asks her question - how did vesper know? how could vesper know? - and something very strange happens. ]

[ vesper visibly brightens. she goes from irritable and sullen to suddenly perky. sorry, anna - you've just actually asked a question she knows the answer to already. ]

Oh! That one's easy. It's because you were singing about it just now. [ her back straightens; she looks directly into anna's eyes, face to face. ] I'm a Kolibri unit, remember? KLBR. Kommando-Leiteinheit Bioresonaztechnik-Replika. We're Generation 6 High-Tech bioresonance specialists, and we're the most powerful ones ever manufactured! So when you sing, it's really easy to hear what you're saying. It's how I figured out Venus was the imprint I was based on, too!

[ she looks... proud of herself, mostly. like she doesn't even register what she's said might be odd, or wrong, or off-putting. finally, anna can see something that vesper is genuinely good at - something that makes her her.

she hopes anna will be impressed. ]

Edited 2023-02-10 19:40 (UTC)

[Waver Velvet only just got here, and already he's tired. Pinned to the rough shirt that looked more fitting for a field expedition or archival spelunking than a proper event was a little tag that read Lord El Melloi II with a further clarifier underneath it: Waver Mackenzie Velvet. If he seemed a little older than the last time they had met, it was not just a trick of Vesper's sensory input. The Pthumerians were fucking with him, and he did not relish the idea of taking the long way through his twenties once more.

Holding his cat, who was adorably wearing a little gray cloak, Waver took his seat across from the odd robot girl.]

Hi, Vesper. Just stick with calling me Mackenzie. I didn't quite expect to meet you like this again.

Edited 2023-02-11 03:34 (UTC)

[yes, there is a part of anna that is impressed. it is not a large part of her, but it is there. she likes seeing this person who reminds her of venus take pride in who she is and what she does. but she places both her hands flat on the table, and she looks right at vesper, and her face is...]

[it's not like staring down the storm that is ariane yeong. it is heavy and old and weary like an iron door that wants to rust shut but people keep coming along and wiping it down just enough anyway. so it never gets what it wants, but it's being given less than what it means. it's a stupid metaphor, but she's a stupid person.]

I'm going to ask you one time to not go into my head. For my sanity. For your safety. For whatever's going to work to convince you that it's a bad idea. I know that it's what you were made to do, but... please. [at least she doesn't seem mad.] Do you get where I'm coming from, or do you need me to explain more?

[ anna looks at her, really looks at her, and her song... changes. less like the shifting of a channel, more like a new song on the same tape. haunted. upset. frustrated without necessarily being angry. rage without rage; a system that must change and a revolutionary that doesn't want to take the first shot.

it's kind of confusing. as much as she understands the feelings, she doesn't understand why they're there-

so she just. says so. ]

I don't, really? [ she doesn't leave it at that - not even for the sake of speed dating. for the sake of anna. ] I mean. I get that you don't want me to? And that makes sense. But- but the Nation isn't here, now, and even if it were I don't think I'd say a word about what I heard.

[ openly seditious words. her eyes flicker from side to side as she says it, like she's still worried some agent will descend upon her. ]

And- and my safety makes a lot of sense, but I don't think your memories are the worst ones I've ever heard? They couldn't be. The LS- um, sorry, Elster's song is the only one I've found that I have to actively avoid listening to. [ she reaches up, tapping gently at her forehead. ] It drilled holes into my body. It jerked my head around and I couldn't stop it. I... I honestly thought I was going to die?

[ she offers a smile. it's not really a certain smile - so much like venus, before she hatched - but it's an attempt at reassurance. ]

So you don't have to worry about that. Even when you've resented me, it's never been anything like that.

[anna frowns back. vesper doesn't understand, and she was hoping so desperately that she would. that she wouldn't have to be here and explain... explain something to her. she leans forward on her arms and starts talking to vesper like she's sharing a very important secret—if secrecy is something that this android understands, then maybe it'll help.]

I don't care about you telling other people. [and her lower back jerks.] ...Fine. I do care. But I also just... you understand these are my thoughts, right? It's my head? And it's not for, like, public consumption. All of this is supposed to stay inside of me until I decide to let it out.

[this is to say nothing of A2. of apollonia. of annalise. of the anna of the past or the intoner. of whoever else she is. her eye, she hasn't realized, is pleading for vesper to understand this.]

Is that too much to ask?

...no, I guess not.

[ vesper jerks in her seat, frowning and breaking eye contact. she purses her lips; her little tapered feet tap irritably against the floor. and finally, after a second zap hits, she grits her teeth and says: ]

Yes. Maybe. It kind of is? [ a frustrated sigh. ] It's like if I said, "I don't want you to know what my voice sounds like, can you make sure you don't hear it?" It's not. It doesn't work that way. I can avoid listening too closely, or I can at least try to, but I can't just stop hearing you when you're singing??

You keep saying that I'm singing. I don't understand what you mean.

[she knows it's a metaphor, or it's something other than literally using her voice to sing. is she projecting these things into the world around her? is she comfortable with that? does vesper even have the ability to stop it, and... and would she be comfortable actually asking her to?]

But you're not... you aren't doing any of it on purpose, is what you're saying? Do I have that right? [she's still trying to be gentle about this, especially in light of that. if this isn't something that she controls, then... it isn't fair to be mad about it.]

Edited 2023-02-11 21:22 (UTC)

Right. Everyone does that. And- and it's not like it's entirely an accident? I mean, I can try to listen more closely. I did earlier when you asked about dating. It's like...

[ she raises her hands up, gesticulates in a way that doesn't quite make any sense. even she understands it's nonsense. she sighs, deflating as she tries to use just her words for it. ]

It's like... Um... Have you ever used a radio?

[well, isn't that exactly what she should've seen coming. her expression lightens; she thinks of venus' radio that's still at their place and being safely guarded. some things don't ever change, and it's the consistencies that she'll have to hold fast to.]

I have. In my room at night, in my car... here, too, but it's not like any radio I've ever seen. So I'm broadcasting my vibe and you're just tuning into the frequency? [at least she's not stupid once she has a little bit to go on. and now that she understands, or at least thinks she does, she's a little more comfortable with joking.] You know, I am still an android. I could probably find a way to shut off that broadcast.

[Maul held up his claws, looking to see if any of them require a trim while he sat there in the chair, looking like he'd rather be just about anywhere else in Trench than stuck in this moment. Was it too late to just go fling himself into the ocean for the next couple of weeks? His own profile was a thing of beauty:]

deerlyBeloved: Sithalicious

He's horny and looking for a good time. Don't let the ever-present look of potential murder in his eyes put you off, this Sith Lord definitely knows how to Force Choke you in all the right ways.

( Maul | 30-somethingish | Male | Sapient species )

[His name tag read: Hello! My name is Darth Maul. He glanced for a moment at the girl sitting across from him before he started speaking.]

I'm already married, so let us stick with platonic questions only, shall we?

Kind of? Yeah. Kind of. [ that's not quite as helpful as you might have hoped, anna. but vesper continues: ] It's more like when the radio is almost tuned right. You can hear it, but it's kind of, um. Staticky? Right? That's what everyone sounds like. All the time.

[ ah. that might put things into perspective, a little. ]

I mean. Maybe? If that's what you'd really want. [ she isn't sure about it. she sounds like she doesn't quite get it. but- ] If... if that's really what you wanted, I guess I could try to help...?

[she thinks she gets it: vesper exists in the middle of a sky the color of a television tuned to a dead channel. of course she does. thanks, billy gibs. and anna just sighs by the end of it and leans forward on her arms, her head hanging only slightly to let her hair curtain her face.]

I was probably just joking about that. I don't want to shut myself off entirely. Lived that life before and it doesn't make anyone happy. [she looks up and feels like she must look exhausted, but she doesn't know how much of it is coming through on her actual face. maybe it's just how she is now. perpetually like this. she can't even force a half-smirk or a lopsided smile or whatever she wants to call it.]

I just... I want to be the one in control of when people learn stuff about me, and what they learn. I want to be the one who decides when to let people in. I don't want to just be this open book that everybody can read, or... like, whatever, you know? [her shoulders slump.] But you can't control what you hear, so I just have to deal with it. 'Cause I'm not getting rid of you.

[ Kainé sits across from Vesper, and as it usually is with the Replika, she feels at a loss. She's uneasy at the idea of anybody gaining access to her thoughts and feelings. She had thought that that nightmare, of never truly owning herself, had been over. Vesper does try to avoid prying, now that she's away from the Nation that built her, but it is difficult not to be on edge. And she is here only because somebody that she cares about is not.

She drums her fingers on the table, staring placidly at the Kolibri unit. She won't turn her away either. She knows that she cannot be having an easy time, and the damnable thing is how much of Venus she sees in her. ]

Hey.

[ kainé is staring at her.

it's not like it's a surprise? it would be hard to surprise her at this point. when you can ambiently feel everyone around you, when they're all singing a song most of them don't even know you can hear - well, it's easy to pick up on the background noise. but just because something is expected doesn't mean it's comfortable, and vesper starts to find herself shifting and squirming a bit under kainé's gaze. ]

Hey. [ for a moment, they just sit there like that. staring at each other. unblinking. and then, finally, vesper asks the simplest question she can think of: ] So, um. What's your favorite color?

Oh. That makes sense. [ and it's not a lie, either - at least, it's less of one than she'd thought it might be. it's good enough for the chairs they've sat in, at least. ] I guess I... kind of get it? But not all of it. I understand not wanting to be- a part of something like that. That can be scary. When it crumbles, you crumble.

[ a beat; a breath, mimicking human function in her own capacity for speech. ]

But- if you could have someone that understood, and could help, I don't understand why that's bad. That feels like home to me.

[ but maybe she doesn't have to understand. she smiles when anna says her piece, and even if she doesn't fully understand anna she appreciates her nonetheless. ]

Thank you for not disposing of me. [ her legs kick idly back and forth against the foot of the chair; they end just barely an inch above the ground, too short to touch it directly. ] I... I really do mean that. Everyone here has been kind, even when it wasn't expedient to them? So. Um. Thanks, again.

[when it crumbles, you crumble. anna understands that only very little, but the way vesper says it, the way she tries to mimic a human so carefully at the end of it, makes it feel very important indeed. so anna tries to treat it with that weight.]

I have someone like that. That's what Kainé is for me—she's my home. But even with her, I don't tell her everything all at once. [there's no shock at her back; that somehow feels worse.] I decide when these things come out. And maybe... maybe I don't always do it right. Maybe I don't tell her enough. But I'd rather screw up and do better next time than just put it all on the table at once.

[she takes a shock to her back at that and isn't surprised, after a moment's thought. after all, isn't she researching a bonding ritual right now? isn't she looking into something that will give her a telepathic bond with kainé? she frowns.]

...But I might not get that choice anymore a few weeks from now anyway.

[ Kainé looks away before Vesper does, irritated but also mildly guilty. She doesn't know how much of this is of the Replika's conscious will, or if she even has the concept of having any kind of ability to will her own actions. She remembers bitter years of being hated and cast out for what she was. Maybe more importantly, it's impossible for her not to see her as in some way the same person as one she cares very much about.

But that doesn't mean she has to be comfortable with this. ]

Blue. Pale blue. [ The sky. His eyes. Forget-me-not and aster. ] It's... free.

open; february catch-all

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