(closed) march catchall

[tealeafs]

Who: Ange (entreats), Chizuru (tealeafs), Daniel (miyagimagic) and various others.
What: March shenanigans.
When: During all of March.
Where: Locations vary.

Content Warnings: Nothing right now, specific warnings will be in headers when they come up.

( starters in the comments! if you want to plot anything with me, feel free to either pm the journal or contact me at queeningsquare, i'm always open to new ideas and threads! )

Comments

[possessum]

( Issues? Peter glances back up at that, listening. It's not something he directly asks about for personal details, more just focused on what the other man chooses to share. There's a little flickering smile again at the part about Peter being a good influence on him, another odd little lump in his throat. )

I would've liked to meet him.

( Said quietly, and it rests strange in his chest. Talking about people from back home almost makes it sound like they're.... dead. Past tense comes in.

But it's different than that, too. A different kind of loss, one Peter can't relate to, his family are all dead, but he can still understand how it might feel — mourning a loved one who could show up here.... Maybe the chances are slim, but there's still a chance, isn't there? Does Daniel think about that? Wondering if his children will wash up on the shores? (Maybe terrified that they would, of what this world could do to them.) A grief that stays halfway. There's no closure.

Peter swallows again, finding his eyes once again dropping down to stare at Daniel's blankets. )

I'm sorry you're here without him. And your daughter— your kids. It must be... really hard.

( He'd been trying to keep things as light-hearted as possible, but.. here Daniel is, recovering from something horrible, and he's here without his family.... it must be lonely. Frightening. You'd never know it, though, with how he never really complains or even voices any upsets. )

—Um. Is there anything I can do for you....? Something more than just making tea. ( A soft echo of a laugh, but it comes out sounding a little helpless. It doesn't feel like... enough. Daniel was almost killed. )

...I mean, what happened, it must've been so...... scary. ( A beat, occupied by a few thuds of his heart. )

I saw it happen, I know it was— ....a lot.

[miyagimagic]

[ Daniel is quiet for a few moments. Sure, he has a lot of thoughts about the stuff Peter is saying here, but.. that's exactly the problem, isn't it. There's so many things he can think here, but feels like he shouldn't say. Because-- yes, it is hard. Of course it's so hard to be here without his wife, without his kids, without even knowing if they're okay.

But with the way Daniel is pouring all of that out over a student just feels wrong. Especially when Peter in particular has so much going on already. The last thing he should have to do is also worry about his sensei on top of it all. ]

I know it might sound slightly silly, but.. I'm fine, knowing I'm going to be okay. [ Even if recovery is an uphill battle. Even though Daniel can only barely bear it with the painkillers Chozen has been bringing home..

But at least he wasn't forever paralyzed. So he'll take this. ]

If anything, I feel more worried about all of you guys than about me. Most of you were caught up too in what happened there, and.. [ Daniel's gaze softens. ] It's like you said. It was a lot, and scary. And you're all still so young.

[ They shouldn't have had to deal with something like this in the first place.

He wishes he could've kept them safe, somehow. ]

[possessum]

( As he listens, Peter drifts just a little closer to where Daniel's propped up in bed, though still gives him a healthy amount of space. The frown at his mouth deepens a little at the words, and he glances back down for a moment as he thinks back on it.

It's.... strange, to look back on. Like some nightmare. He remembers the initial stun — that feeling when something awful and big and changing happens and your mind can't really process it, can barely see it for what it is. He remembers standing there feeling outside of his own body, and then he remembers seeing Daniel....

....After that, there's no memory. Paimon took control of him, and that's all he really knows. There's more he should find out about it, a pressing guilt in his gut, but Peter hasn't reached out much, hasn't asked. Hasn't even contacted Mob, opting to give the younger teen his space. But god, poor Mob......

He swallows hard, eyes dragging back up to look at Daniel. )

I haven't.... talked to him yet. Mob— Shigeo. ( Something fretful tugs up under Peter's ribcage, that guilt like a pair of thin hands wringing themselves tightly. )

He must be so...... upset. With what happened. With— you getting so hurt.

[miyagimagic]

[ There's a tiny nod. ]

I talked to him.

[ Because of course Daniel also invited Mob over, just like he did with all of his other students. If anything, he wanted to make sure to talk to Mob even more, because.. ]

I wanted to make sure he knew it wasn't his fault. Not really. [ Not that Daniel thought that'd be enough for Mob to let go of all that guilt. It isn't so easy. But he at least had to make sure the boy knew Daniel wasn't blaming him.

He could never blame any of his students, not over stuff like this. ]

But he's still having a hard time. [ Obviously. Peter himself already imagined as much, so Daniel doesn't mind sharing it, glancing at Peter with a small smile, something sad in it. ] If it's too much for you, you don't have to, but.. could you talk with Shigeo too, Peter? He could use his friends right now.

[ Are Peter and Mob friends? Not like Daniel knows, but he figures there's got to be at least some same dojo comraderie.. Especially when both Peter and Mob are such good kids in Daniel's eyes. ]

[possessum]

( Peter's frown deepens again at the words and he's nodding, fully agreeing with everything Daniel's saying. He knew Daniel would never blame Mob, and it's a relief to hear that he's spoken to the boy directly. Daniel's so kind and sincere, and to hear from the very person you unintentionally seriously hurt that they don't blame you.... that means a lot. Peter knows it would.

He can also believe that Mob would still be having a really hard time with it. Peter's heart clenches up again, and he's giving a soft exhale. )

I will— I promise. ( Peter looks back up, brows still knit. )

We talked about it before — things like it, I mean. I didn't know exactly what his powers were capable of, but he told me they were... a lot. We talked about... being worried about it. Being scared to hurt people.

I understand how even if he knows it's not really his fault, even if people tell him, it might.... it might be hard to fully see it that way. Because when you're capable of something like that..... the act of being around people at all can feel like something you shouldn't do. Like maybe the really responsible thing to do is stay away.... so you can never accidentally hurt them.

( His voice is soft, but it tightens with empathy for Mob, and something that's maybe a little angry, an emotion that Peter doesn't often allow to leak through. Or more than that, an emotion he very rarely feels at all, the one that's been most numbed down in him. But here and now, it comes through just a little, because.... )

He's so young to have to deal with that. It's not.... fair.

[miyagimagic]

[ It's hard to not spot the emotion about Peter as he's saying all of this. Daniel didn't think this hard about this angle when he asked Peter to talk to Mob, more just wanting to have general company for the boy, but.. he only now realises the specific angle in which Peter could provide help when the boy is mentioning it.

Of course. The two of them deal with something very similar, after all. Even if it is entirely different in nature, the effects it can leave behind.. they're the same.

It makes Daniel reach out - slowly, considering his current state and inability to move very far - to put a gentle hand on Peter's arm. ]

Thank you, Peter.

[ He pauses for a moment after the statement, just to ensure the boy realises this is genuine thanks - Daniel even smiles a little.

(You're so young too, too young to be dealing with all of that, he thinks as he looks at Peter, though he doesn't voice it in this moment.) ]

I sure wish neither of you had to deal with this in the first place, but.. I guess a tiny upside to all of it is that it means you have someone who understands this sort of thing on a very personal level, huh..?

[possessum]

( Peter's giving a little glance down as the man's hand touches his arm, offering a soft smile in response. It's hard to smile much in all of this — probably for both of them, all of this is... a lot — but it's there, and he sees Daniel smile a little bit, too.

It's certainly not the first time that Peter's felt gently, safely encouraged to keep going with thoughts that he usually doesn't allow voice. With Daniel, it's always been so easy to. And here, too..... )

....Yeah. ( A quiet sigh, a gentle nod. ) Yeah, it's— it's probably a weird thing to be happy about, but... it's nice to have him. To be able to talk to him about it. He gets what it's like to feel like....... you're a ticking time bomb.

( ...And poor Mob had exploded. Peter's expression tightens again, and he's looking down. )

I can't help thinking like... maybe that could've happened to me, too. Maybe it still will. Maybe I'll be the one to hurt people, next. Like you, and everyone—

....Seeing you like this— what if I'm the one who hurts you next time?