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deercountry2023-03-08 01:10 pm
reddosmod) wrote in deercountry2023-03-08 01:10 pm
The House Always Wins
MARCH 2023 EVENT
TOO MUCH OF A GOOD THING
THE LEECH
HIGH STAKES
CODING
Due to the UNIQUE NATURE of the Moss King, previous March events are NOT available during this month's event. Please keep that in mind.
IMAGE DESCRIPTORS IN ORDER OF APPEARANCE
Prompt One
[Image One: Fanged, smiling carnivorous plant from little shop of horrors ]
[Image Two: House overgrown by roots.]
Prompt Two
[Image One: Person covered in glistening film that seems to be suffocating.]
[Image Two: Woman's face splattered in blood. ]
Prompt Three
[Image One: Poker chip with an anime girl's face on it. ]
[Image Two: Dogs Gambling Painting, but it's famous horror monster villains instead of dogs. ]
Prompt One
[Image One: Fanged, smiling carnivorous plant from little shop of horrors ]
[Image Two: House overgrown by roots.]
Prompt Two
[Image One: Person covered in glistening film that seems to be suffocating.]
[Image Two: Woman's face splattered in blood. ]
Prompt Three
[Image One: Poker chip with an anime girl's face on it. ]
[Image Two: Dogs Gambling Painting, but it's famous horror monster villains instead of dogs. ]
WHEN: March 8-31
WHERE: The City of Trench and surrounding regions
CONTENT WARNINGS: Plant-Based Peril, Isolation, Entrapment, Carnivorous Plants, possible but unlikely death.
WHERE: The City of Trench and surrounding regions
CONTENT WARNINGS: Plant-Based Peril, Isolation, Entrapment, Carnivorous Plants, possible but unlikely death.
The plentiful and bountiful harvest of plants that started to blossom towards the beginning of the month has continued, and if anything? It's getting more and more troublesome. The old saying goes that too much of a good thing is too much, and this is definitely the proof of that pudding. Plants are literally growing everywhere. Trenchies can be seen cutting branches out of impossible locations, and vegetation is beginning to grow inside of established businesses and homes. There is an ever increasing market for vileblood based defoliation options that are being offered by entrepreneurial Trenchies, but the fact that more than a few of those selling the stuff have gone missing under strange circumstances calls into question their efficacy.
For Sleepers, this means that the possibility of encountering enlarged and potentially dangerous plants such as those seen in the earliest parts of the months grows ever more real. A human-sized venus flytrap might very well try to snatch one up, with all of the peril that entails. However, while it is possible for any exotic plant to carry with it potentially lethal threat, most of these are able to be dealt with by even the untrained with a machete. The real problem is the root systems and the plants that ones that talk. The former are the most likely to be encountered. Root systems grow over entire buildings during the mid to late month, choking over light sources and blocking windows to dim houses. They clench their grip over doors, making getting out of one's house an act of willpower and muscle that may have to be repeaated over and over again. Worst of all is the fact that many of these root systems almost seem to be intentionally creating barriers around the Lantern Network! The little moaners are safe, but their sphere of protection becomes a dome of wood, shielding and keeping them away from those naughty sleepers trying to hack their way to a teleport.
The talking ones, though, are downright disturbing. They're not very large, at first they do indeed seem to whisper and beg to be fed. Naturally, only blood will do, and the longer that they're fed the larger and more dangerous that they can become. But, so long as one doesn't feed them, they're harmless, right? Wrong. True, they can bite and it's easy enough to avoid them. However, it's what they start to say when they're denied their food that becomes disturbing. “There is a consequence of your actions, you know.” “Do not think that you are immune.” “Saving the Moss Brat seems wise now, but have a long memory.” Things like that. The voices they take on are eerie, unnatural and do not match the plants' normal begging voices. They never clear up who is speaking or what they're speaking about, but surely it's not a big issue, right?
By the end of the month, the plants wither away and break off of the various homes and businesses, leaving no visible damage behind, as if whatever caused them has faded entirely.
For Sleepers, this means that the possibility of encountering enlarged and potentially dangerous plants such as those seen in the earliest parts of the months grows ever more real. A human-sized venus flytrap might very well try to snatch one up, with all of the peril that entails. However, while it is possible for any exotic plant to carry with it potentially lethal threat, most of these are able to be dealt with by even the untrained with a machete. The real problem is the root systems and the plants that ones that talk. The former are the most likely to be encountered. Root systems grow over entire buildings during the mid to late month, choking over light sources and blocking windows to dim houses. They clench their grip over doors, making getting out of one's house an act of willpower and muscle that may have to be repeaated over and over again. Worst of all is the fact that many of these root systems almost seem to be intentionally creating barriers around the Lantern Network! The little moaners are safe, but their sphere of protection becomes a dome of wood, shielding and keeping them away from those naughty sleepers trying to hack their way to a teleport.
The talking ones, though, are downright disturbing. They're not very large, at first they do indeed seem to whisper and beg to be fed. Naturally, only blood will do, and the longer that they're fed the larger and more dangerous that they can become. But, so long as one doesn't feed them, they're harmless, right? Wrong. True, they can bite and it's easy enough to avoid them. However, it's what they start to say when they're denied their food that becomes disturbing. “There is a consequence of your actions, you know.” “Do not think that you are immune.” “Saving the Moss Brat seems wise now, but have a long memory.” Things like that. The voices they take on are eerie, unnatural and do not match the plants' normal begging voices. They never clear up who is speaking or what they're speaking about, but surely it's not a big issue, right?
By the end of the month, the plants wither away and break off of the various homes and businesses, leaving no visible damage behind, as if whatever caused them has faded entirely.
WHEN: Second Half of March
WHERE: Anywhere in Trench, but not the Outpost.
CONTENT WARNINGS: Magically Cursed Ailment, Severe weakness, Anemia
WHERE: Anywhere in Trench, but not the Outpost.
CONTENT WARNINGS: Magically Cursed Ailment, Severe weakness, Anemia
You didn't think it would be that easy, did you? From the moment that the first talking plants appeared in Trench, there has been another ominous presence. Unbeknownst to the people of Trench, but the Moss King is recovering from Riteior's attack and, while they are safe and slowly getting back to their normal self, this has allowed for Riteior to offer a little payback in an effort to cause trouble to those seeking to stop his attacks on the Pthumerians of Trench. In the night, while characters are sleeping, the plants strike. They wake to find a thin film over them, but otherwise it appears harmless. The next full day, there's nothing wrong and they feel hail and hearty. In fact, those pesky little talking plants are gone from their house. Of course, the next day the horror begins to settle in.
Within 48 hours, Sleepers will find themselves weak and lethargic in the extreme. The condition is not fatal, but it is problematic and irritating. They will find that no amount of food, water and rest quite gets rid of the malaise that they are experiencing, a strange drowsiness and lack of energy plaguing their every moment. The longer it persists, the more dangerous it becomes. However, there appears to be no obvious cause, at least until they visit someone capable of treating their condition, be they a Blood Minister or trained physician. Victims of this curse appear to be suffering from a severe, but not life-threatening anemia. There is no obvious cause, but the Ministers are certain that it is not natural and is likely a result of a curse of some kind. They can offer stimulants and high energy food, which will help the person experiencing the condition, but the real danger comes if they try to use their blood for a blood ritual of any kind. The insidious reason becomes obvious. Someone is attempting to stop them from safely having enough blood to perform the rituals to seal them away!
Victims are “fine” in the sense that they could get through the month safely without risk of death and just be weaker. However, if they attempt any form of blood ritual or blood letting, they risk running out of blood, which would indeed be a life threatening concern. The only solution, then, is a blood transfusion of another type. The Blood Ministers are willing to provide blood from their banks, but caution that it is better if a fresh supply is used. Do you have a friend willing to lend a hand? Or, do you miss one of the deadlines this month for fighting back Riteior?
FAQ:
This condition strikes after the mid-month, when the latest batch of rituals further weakens Riteior, and ensures the Moss King's safety.
This condition is not life threatening, unless a person attempts to use blood for a ritual or other purpose without first receiving a transfusion.
If a person attempts to perform a blood ritual before getting a transfusion, their anemia can become life threatening very quickly.
It is possible to completely avoid this prompt by not being targeted by Riteior. His cursed targeting is not that precise and he is clearly becoming desperate.
When a transfusion is given, both participants will be lightly anemic for another 24 hours, but the condition will fade afterwards completely.
It is suspected strongly by some of the Blood Ministers and Arcane Scholars that this is a curse brought about by a brief moment of control over the Moss King by Riteior. This can be learned easily in conversation with members of the orders in Trench.
Within 48 hours, Sleepers will find themselves weak and lethargic in the extreme. The condition is not fatal, but it is problematic and irritating. They will find that no amount of food, water and rest quite gets rid of the malaise that they are experiencing, a strange drowsiness and lack of energy plaguing their every moment. The longer it persists, the more dangerous it becomes. However, there appears to be no obvious cause, at least until they visit someone capable of treating their condition, be they a Blood Minister or trained physician. Victims of this curse appear to be suffering from a severe, but not life-threatening anemia. There is no obvious cause, but the Ministers are certain that it is not natural and is likely a result of a curse of some kind. They can offer stimulants and high energy food, which will help the person experiencing the condition, but the real danger comes if they try to use their blood for a blood ritual of any kind. The insidious reason becomes obvious. Someone is attempting to stop them from safely having enough blood to perform the rituals to seal them away!
Victims are “fine” in the sense that they could get through the month safely without risk of death and just be weaker. However, if they attempt any form of blood ritual or blood letting, they risk running out of blood, which would indeed be a life threatening concern. The only solution, then, is a blood transfusion of another type. The Blood Ministers are willing to provide blood from their banks, but caution that it is better if a fresh supply is used. Do you have a friend willing to lend a hand? Or, do you miss one of the deadlines this month for fighting back Riteior?
FAQ:
WHEN: Second Half of March
WHERE: Goat Turning in The Cellar Door
CONTENT WARNINGS: Gambling, Possible Coersion, lowered inhibitions, Risk of Character Death
WHERE: Goat Turning in The Cellar Door
CONTENT WARNINGS: Gambling, Possible Coersion, lowered inhibitions, Risk of Character Death
The Moss King appears to be 'on the mend' by the latter part of the month, or at least he seems to be his usual self. A flyer advertising a special for all Sleepers and residents of Trench at the Goat Turning, his personal gambling hall, circulates throughout town. The doors of the Goat Turning will be open to absolutely everyone, and nobody will be turned away for an event that will last the last two weeks of the month! Anyone who comes will be given a complementary set of chips for free, along with a very special commemorative poker chip embossed with their own face on it which they are assured they can keep afterwards, assuming they don't lose it betting! In fact, that commemorative chip is the only way that a person can return to the Goat Turning during this period, and has to be shown to get admittance, though you don't need to bet it even if it appears to be worth quite a lot! Every night, a new allotment of chips is offered to gamblers. It isn't much, and if they're willing to trade a few goods to get more, they can supplement their stash. What could be more fun than a friendly game?
The drinks and food are free for those attending, and even better? They don't seem to have a lot of strange effects. The drinks seem to ease the symptoms of corruption, in fact, and make a person more relaxed and at ease, along with lessening their inhibitions. The food is filling and pleasant, but salty, making one crave the drinks more. But, honestly, compared to Generosity's botched and spoiled food in January it's almost heavenly, even if it does make it easier to want to keep gambling and gambling. After all, those prizes for the big winners of the night are certainly something to behold, and the kinds of luxuries that Trenchies drool over.
The Big Prizes: (Maximum 1 big prize per character for the month)
A Lunar Orb
A Vial of Pthumerian Blood that can leave a person feeling sickly and weak if they come in contact with it
A Genuine Lantern, enabling a second teleportation location to be placed!
A Blood Enchanted Weapon or Armor.
An Item from Home that a character might not normally find washing up on shore
The Lesser Prizes:
Players are encouraged to use their imagination on lesser prizes that could be won. Food. Supplies. Furnishings. Weapons. Tools. Clothing. Any number of valuable could be won throughout the month.
So, what's the catch? There's always a catch. Well, like any gambling hall, the saying goes that the House Always Wins. This isn't true universally. You could have a hot streak at the Craps table, or you might just win on your lucky number in Roulette. It is very possible to walk away with enough chips to win a big prize all in one night, or build up over time to claim such a lofty goal. But the trick is that commemorative chip. It's the admission, and it's also the only way you can leave the gambling den each night. The chip must be presented both at entry and leaving, and only then does the reality become clear. That chip is so valuable because it represents your life! You might literally be betting with your life here! Should you lose your chip and not have it at the end of the night, the impressive and powerful bouncers at the door will bar you from exit, and once the hall closes there is nowhere to go but the basement. Anyone who enters the basement after hours will find that their life is indeed forfeit, and their debt is called. They will die down below. How will they die? Well, considering the fighting pits down below, any of a thousand deaths, some more gruesome than others, are possible. And, if another player holds their chip, they will be given a special pass to remain below, to demand their price themselves.
So, if you lose your chip is it still possible to get it back? Absolutely! It is a gambling hall, after all. Someone just has to be willing to give it back, or to win it back from another player or the house. What could be simpler? Of course, because there are no compulsions in the commemorative chip, and no rules about how it is to be used or transferred other than that it must be won from the house in a fair game, it is almost as if the Moss King is testing his own guests to see just how far they will go, and what they will do if their life or the life of a friend is on the line.
FAQ:
Players are limited to one grand prize per character. Please record this prize on the prompt below.
Characters that die because of this event may die in any reasonable fashion in the basement. Tools are provided. This may be handwaved.
Because this event involves the potential of players bargaining for their lives and death, we remind players to be mindful and communicative with others regarding permissions and preferences during this event. Do not break permissions.
Lesser prizes can be won in quantity, but we ask that you be reasonable about this.
The Commemorative Chip is non-magical and there is no compulsion to gamble with it.
It is simply worth a lot more.
The Event is not age restricted, so underage gambling is possible.
The drinks and food are free for those attending, and even better? They don't seem to have a lot of strange effects. The drinks seem to ease the symptoms of corruption, in fact, and make a person more relaxed and at ease, along with lessening their inhibitions. The food is filling and pleasant, but salty, making one crave the drinks more. But, honestly, compared to Generosity's botched and spoiled food in January it's almost heavenly, even if it does make it easier to want to keep gambling and gambling. After all, those prizes for the big winners of the night are certainly something to behold, and the kinds of luxuries that Trenchies drool over.
The Big Prizes: (Maximum 1 big prize per character for the month)
The Lesser Prizes:
Players are encouraged to use their imagination on lesser prizes that could be won. Food. Supplies. Furnishings. Weapons. Tools. Clothing. Any number of valuable could be won throughout the month.
So, what's the catch? There's always a catch. Well, like any gambling hall, the saying goes that the House Always Wins. This isn't true universally. You could have a hot streak at the Craps table, or you might just win on your lucky number in Roulette. It is very possible to walk away with enough chips to win a big prize all in one night, or build up over time to claim such a lofty goal. But the trick is that commemorative chip. It's the admission, and it's also the only way you can leave the gambling den each night. The chip must be presented both at entry and leaving, and only then does the reality become clear. That chip is so valuable because it represents your life! You might literally be betting with your life here! Should you lose your chip and not have it at the end of the night, the impressive and powerful bouncers at the door will bar you from exit, and once the hall closes there is nowhere to go but the basement. Anyone who enters the basement after hours will find that their life is indeed forfeit, and their debt is called. They will die down below. How will they die? Well, considering the fighting pits down below, any of a thousand deaths, some more gruesome than others, are possible. And, if another player holds their chip, they will be given a special pass to remain below, to demand their price themselves.
So, if you lose your chip is it still possible to get it back? Absolutely! It is a gambling hall, after all. Someone just has to be willing to give it back, or to win it back from another player or the house. What could be simpler? Of course, because there are no compulsions in the commemorative chip, and no rules about how it is to be used or transferred other than that it must be won from the house in a fair game, it is almost as if the Moss King is testing his own guests to see just how far they will go, and what they will do if their life or the life of a friend is on the line.
FAQ:
Ooh! Who do you associate Luz with then??
It wasn't a thought Luz really had anymore, but it had been there for a while, and Luz didn't really know how to explain that to her mom. How did you NOT think you were a failure for not being able to be "normal" after your father was gone and it was hard enough to move on, and then have to deal with school things.
She smiled, taking her hands and holding hers in Lexi's.
"I know. Or at least, I tell myself that when something bad happens, and then I forget to actually tell you because I'm trying to recover. That's pretty dumb, of course. I want to be as honest with you as I can, because I love you and I can be honest. So give me a moment."
She'd get to it. It just...sometimes took a little bit of time.
"Don't count on that. Lexi, I hope you never have to do it, but know that when you tell yourself you won't, you're denying yourself something that could help. I've made that mistake before: trust me when I tell you that you don't want to repeat that mistake."
Luz chuckled. "Good. Maybe he can make himself less threatening. As long as you're defending yourself from something bad, you're not doing anything wrong. I mean, as long as it's not, you know, 'the cornfield,' if you know what I mean."
Lexi knew.
Luz leaned over and held Lexi tight. "I think I was starting to like you then. I didn't know how the heck to deal with that, of course! My past crushes had pretty much ended in disaster, so I figured this was just a coincidence. But the more I talked to you, the more I liked you. You have that effect on me."
Luz would help her all the way, as much as she could. When Lexi needed her, she would be there, and when she didn't, she'd hang back and let Lexi deal.
"I think you'll do great! Just don't overthink it or be discouraged when you don't get it right away. That takes time, and I know you have the patience to get it!"
Luz winced. "Yeah, I love animals but...I can't give up actually eating animal flesh? It's an essential part of a Spanish diet, and I definitely don't know enough about vegetables to know what substitutes what."
Luz totally took that seriously.
"Don't be afraid to ask me for help, sweetie! I'd...well, I'd do anything to help you, and that includes our dream job! I'll go to bat for you whenever you need me to."
Luz giggled. "W-what? How would-that's so-"
She'd recover from laughing, just give her a minute.
"Oh, sure, if you want. But it isn't a one up thing. I just think you happen to resemble something beautiful and precious and prized and I'm super lucky. That's all."
Luz giggled. "Lexi, you can call me anything you want. I love your names, ok?"
That's pretty hard, given that I usually play m/f! I'll think about it!
And Lexi had given up on explaining her own comparatively mild issues with mental health given that so many others seemed to have it so much worse and what was Lexi upset about anyway? A little sibling rivalry and being abandoned by her dad? Who didn't have those things to deal with?
And Lexi drew Luz's hand closely, hugging it to herself.
"I--well, I know you have a lot of friends here before you met me. So I get it. The putting yourself out for them," so Lexi didn't want her to be holding Luz back in any way, shape, or form. Just know that Lexi had her back.
That made happy tears well up in Lexi's eyes. "Really? So I wasn't making a total idiot of myself?"
And Lexi laughed, "No, I don't. Unless it's supposed to be a 'Children of the Corn' reference? Seriously? A bad movie I haven't watched? Seriously?"
That made Lexi caress Luz's cheek. "You're not the only one. Even the crushes I had who were into girls chose other girls before looking at me."
But..."An effect? I almost feel like the description label of an anti-histamine," Lexi said with a grin.
"And...I'm the same. I had a crush on Rue since I was a kid, but she never saw me that way. Even after years--a decade--had passed, Rue saw me as her trusty friend, Lexi, the one who'd always be there to pee in a cup so Rue could cheat a drug test or take extensive notes in the classes we shared so Rue could have them, too. Good ol' Lexi, right? More like good ol' Yeller, complete with the depressing ending." Rue couldn't help but be self-deprecating, given the subject. For years, she'd thought that Rue would wake up and see what was right in front of her. Lexi was wrong.
And the same could be said for Luz, even though Luz depended upon her outer abilities rather than her blood ones.
Lexi winced, too. "I can't give it up, either, not completely. Though the whole 'no shellfish' rule is putting a serious harsh on my vibe." But anyway, as long as Luz didn't keep kosher or halal, no one should mind.
Reluctantly, Lexi said "I know. I know you are. But the messing with others' heads thing? Is kinda violent by nature. I mean, how to you carefully mess with the perceptions of others?"
Giving a minute~~
"Okay. I'll take that as a description and not whine too much. Only a little. Meaning, how on earth did I get that name?"
And Lexi giggled as well. "oh, oh, oh, you're asking me to bring up the really obscure shit, aren't you?"
When it comes to you, of course!
"She's not well, and the actions of somebody like that is not going to be caring about the people who are helping. Even trying to understand what she's doing will be impossible. It's probably all impulses."
And did Luz agree with them? Not at all. And the reason why would manifest easily.
Lexi still had legitimate things to contend with, it just wasn't as loud as Rue's or, apparently, as aesthetically pleasing as :exi's sister somehow. It was just OK to leave Lexi's problems on her own to deal with. That was the thing Luz hated, that it was just ok to have Lexi be grown up and strong and try to smile despite everything.
Luz looked at Lexi and sighed. "Yes. It is that. I've seen people have to deal with horrible memories, some from Deerington, some from their own world. I didn't know it, but over time, I realized how hard it was to try and make a life for yourself with people you hope understood you. That was why I wanted to stay in Trench, to be with those people, to love and protect them like they did for me."
She swallowed, then laughed. "Are you kidding me? Even then, I wanted to know more about you! What sort of books you liked. What music you listened to. What made you laugh? Maybe you didn't mean to, but you had my attention, and I had to talk to you again."
Luz shook her head. "No, I mean that kid from the Twilight Zone, the one that wished his enemies into the cornfield! Good guess though!"
Luz shook her head. "Then I messed up saying what you mean. I'm not always great at...saying how I feel to someone that surprises me all the time, who makes me happy every time I see her. I don't think words work for me like I want them to."
But here, Luz seized Lexi's hands and looked into her eyes. Luz's gaze seemed to penetrate here, but not in an angry way. Luz just stared at her girlfriend with a mixture of devotion and regret.
"I won't....I CAN'T do that to you. I wouldn't. You're better than Rue deserved. If there's one thing I'm happy about, it's that I saw you when she didn't. Now she'll have to manage without having you to help her, and that's sad for her."
She swallowed, licking her lips. "But not for me."
Luz was blushing wildly, hardly believing what she was saying, yet not feeling sorry for an instant at what she was saying.
"I will never understand why religion cares about the food we eat."
That was just it. Food was food! Would she follow exclusion of some things for Lexi? Absolutely! But ask her why it was excluded and Luz would just shrug.
Luz grimaced. "I don't know. I think that's something you need to practice so you don't. I told you that I'd be your guinea pig for that."
Luz made a face. "What, 'sweetie?' Because you are one. Do you hate it? I can come up with something different!"
It was only fair, right?
"Well. Now I'm just curious."
Melissa Etheridge is too easy and I don't like the Indigo Girls!
"...I know. I know she's not well. She hasn't been for a very long time, even before her dad died. And for the longest time, I made excuses for it, but. I can't anymore. Or at least I know I shouldn't. We all have...damage," Lexi said softly.
It was impossible to be more aesthetically pleasing than Cassie. Blonde hair, blue eyes, perfect figure. Honestly, Lexi had no idea where Cassie had come by those features since both of their parents were dark eyed brunettes. And so were their grandparents on both sides. She figured that maybe there was something to genetics, but she didn't know where they came from.
"I want to stay here, too. It's. Easier. To be me here. And the people here like me. For who I really am and after, I don't know. A long time trying to be likeable when it turns out all I needed was another world to find people who liked me. Weird, huh?" Lexi asked with a small, self-deprecating chuckle.
"Ohhh! See, I don't think I've seen that episode. Of course the one where William Shatner sees the monster on the plane wing kind of stands out," she said with a grin.
And Lexi's smile turned tender. "I understand. I...I have the same problem. About the words not working right. Even though I want them to. But I understand you, even when the words don't quite work."
When Luz took Lexi's hands, she gave them a firm squeeze in response, an anchor to show that Lexi was there and would fight as fiercely for Luz as Luz had for her. "I'm glad you saw me. Gladder than I can ever say."
And Lexi had to duck in for a kiss at that, how could she not kiss Luz after such a confession?
Lexi didn't regret a thing. It felt like all of the disappointment and regret had built together to be the person who could still open herself up and accept Luz's love.
"Me neither, but I miss clam chowder. And crab cakes. And lobster everything."
And Lexi would never ask that of Luz, she should get to eat whatever she wanted without her girlfriend holding her back from the things she loved.
"I know, but I hate the idea of guinea pigs to begin with. Cruelty-free makeup and hair products, after all."
"All right, mon rêve."
I see you and raise you an Ani Difranco!
Rue not realizing the girl she had was on her.
"Right. You can try and nudge her toward a way to fix that, but she has to want to, or it won't work. And the thing is, she might not even get to that frame of mind because of you. It might be something else! It really comes down to how things affect you in the moment. It doesn't mean you didn't do your best to try."
Luz had been around Lexi: she knew darn well that if you mattered to her, Lexi would do everything she could to try to help you.
And there was no point extolling Cassie's looks to Luz: if she didn't have Lexi's charm and wit and genuine earnestness, Luz wouldn't see Cassie as anything but a pretty girl that made bad decisions that everyone fawned over. There were plenty of people she knew who were like that.
Lexi was worth a thousand of them.
"Maybe it was THAT place that was bad for you. You were trying to work in a place where the way you were only worked if you said it the right way, and the right people like it. That's just trying to please people who don't care about who you really are, just what you show them that they can understand."
Luz, like Lexi, was not adored back home, and while Luz was fine with that, the adults around her thought it made her somehow deficient.
"Are you kidding?! That's, like, a well known episode! The Simpsons even reference it! Ok. We are having a Twilight Zone marathon, you and me. Sure its in black and white and old, but it's good!"
Dork, forever and always!
"Some people make words hard," Luz said, gazing at her girlfriend. "And that's saying something when the person they're talking to is already weak as paper."
Luz smiled. "I like to think we saw each other. That was what made it so great. It felt like the most natural thing in the world, I couldn't believe it was happening."
Oh please. A weak Luz wouldn't resist a kiss, and a devoted Luz would just cling on. Luz knew she was weak and tired, but all she could think of right now was staying close to Lexi.
"I love you very much Lexi. I just can't give up seafood."
Pig, sure. Pigs were cute, she didn't care how big and grunty they got, and as good as they tasted, for Lexi she would make that sacrifice. Seafood was where she drew the line-mostly because it would severely limit what she could eat in Trench.
"Oh, good point! I'll be your...target practice? No, that sounds worse. Crap. I'll come up with another word for it later!"
Luz winked at Lexi. "I WILL be looking up these words, you'll see."
Oooh, hadn't thought of her! That could work!
"I guess. It's just that you know about my mom and dad. So it was like third verse, same as the first, not at all different. And there's the whole hopeless thing which comes with being close to someone with problems they can't necessarily overcome. Not unless they want it and I'm not sure any of them do," she said regretfully. Her mom had been...as she was for as long as Lexi can remember. Her dad following suit after a near fatal car accident. And Rue during her father's fight with cancer. All of them had genuine reasons behind their behavior, but it didn't make it any easier to watch on the outside.
And Lexi would. Even if it meant people being wished into this scenario. Get them away from the source of bad behavior, whatever it was, and maybe they'd find a way to heal.
Maybe Lexi was too soft-hearted, but with the benefit of hindsight, she'd realized that the only reason why people really fawned over Cassie was because she was beautiful. They didn't seem to care about what she thought or how they felt and that to Lexi would be hell--was hell since she felt like that while she was home.
"You're probably right...I mean, what does it say when I think of the worst thing I can and it's my high school? It's not even damning with faint praise, it's just plain damning." She wondered what would have happened if she had put on her play. What people would've thought. In retrospect, it was too bitter, at least the part about her sister.
And Lexi was considered weird for wanting to do silly things like go as Bob Ross to a Halloween party. For being bookish and getting good grades and tagging along with others who were clearly closer with each other than they were to her.
That made Lexi grin. "You're on. And I still need to come up with the votes for a bad movie party. The problem is, I don't want to inflict Tommy Wiseau's ass on anyone and that's the worst movie I can think of."
"Me neither! It was--I've never gotten along with anyone so well so fast. And I thought you were cute, but I didn't know if you thought I was cute, but we managed to figure things out anyway and that's kind of a miracle." A light when things were at their darkest. That's what it was. And she hoped it always would be.
Lexi wrapped Luz in her arms, trying to keep her feeling supported and held. She could tell that Luz was feeling a little weak and wanted to do what she could to try and help her feel better and if that meant she could cling to Lexi like a koala if she wanted, so would it be.
"It's just shellfish!" she exclaimed with a laugh. "Fish-fish are fine. But I swear I'll never make you eat Gefilte fish. There are lines and that's crossing them," and she honestly wondered if people actually liked the fish or if it was something everyone was lying about to everyone. At least Matzoh ball soup was good.
Lexi honestly disagreed about pigs after a tragic petting zoo incident as a kindergartener. If anyone would have felt justified in eating them as revenge, it should have been her.
"Yeah, target practice is no good. Neither is guinea pig. Those are bad terms." Lexi said firmly. "And I refuse to accept them."
And she laughed. "I'd be disappointed if you didn't!"
See, there we go! And Ani's got the superior "32 flavors!" Alannah Miles, feh.
"And the thing is, I'm just like you, Lexi, in a way. I want to help, but if people aren't going to take the help I give them, what's left to do but leave them to their own devices? You can try and make sure that they don't hurt themselves, but they can somehow make that happen all on their own."
Sometimes a place like Trench would even give them a push, while Luz just wanted to make sure that nothing this bad ever happened to Lexi.
One could only hope?
Lexi had been lucky to find Luz then- she DID think Lexi was beautiful, but it was in addition to already being smart and witty and far more complicate than people gave her credit for.
"High school can be bad for a lot of reasons. Trust me when I say? It might be a good thing that it IS the worst thing you can imagine. I can imagine worse situations because I've either lived through them or seen them through other people's eyes. You can sleep much easier not knowing some of those things, I can tell you that."
Some nightmares only needed the smallest prompt of a reminder.
Lexi would always have a weird friend in Luz. That was just a fact!
Luz sniffed. "Ok, so I'm not going to be super happy with seeing some guy's butt, which you seem to indicate is way disappointing, but if the movie is as bad as you say it is, I still might want to see it anyway!"
She could always regret it later!
"Oh, I'm adorable," Luz said with a wave of her hand, "but you're actually beautiful, and that was the thing that was making me chicken out at first. I kept thinking what right does my goofball butt have trying to talk to HER, you know? I was a little intimidated, so I had to psych myself out to go for it!"
It had been a risk, but luckily it paid off!
As for the affection, Luz was drinking in all of it. She nestled into the crook of Lexi's shoulder, her cheek resting on Lexi's cheek, and gave the softest purr.
"I kinda love shellfish though," Luz admitted. "Crabs, Lobster, mussles, clams...I could keep eating those until I'm full."
Luz made a face. "I don't think you could pay me enough to eat a fish that looks like it was fermenting in a jar."
Luz had read Charlotte's Web when she was younger and had a big cry on it.
"Your dummy, then?"
Now she was just being facecious!
"I'll just have to come up with more nicknames for you too, to make things interesting!"
wow, that's a blast from the past with alannah miles!
Lexi breathed a sigh and nodded. "And if they don't want to help themselves, there's no way to make them take our hands if they don't want to. Or aren't ready yet."
Strange, Lexi wanted to do the same for Luz. Protect her from whatever might happen. Come to her defense when that wasn't an option. She was stronger than people gave her credit for, at least back home.
Smart and witty, Lexi had no trouble acknowledging. And she even thought she had pretty eyes, a dark chocolate brown. But beautiful? That still threw her for a loop. She was trying to be better about it, even though it was strange to acknowledge to herself that others (especially Luz) thought she was beautiful.
"Yeah, but I don't want you to feel like you have to...I don't know. Maybe not bury those experiences, but feel like you can't talk to people about them. I know you like to watch out over others and that's one of the reasons why I love you, but sometimes you need to take care of you first," Lexi said earnestly. "After all, if you're not feeling 100%, how can you help someone else feel that way.
/cue "You've Got a Friend in Me" from Toy Story. which was one of Lexi's favorite movies of all time.
"Oh, god, it's not just the bet. It's the massive number of completely ridiculous love scenes. That one's not appropriate for anyone under eighteen which I know makes me a hypocrite given the whole seventeen thing. Crap. I'll need to think back through the worst of the worst and find one everyone can see and laugh at. Nothing too kid-y, but nothing too much over PG-13." And Lexi sighed. "Which doesn't leave me with a lot of options, but I'll figure something out."
"And I'm so glad you did. As for me, well...I was sure I was just seeing things, interpreting things wrong. Like a whole 'there's no way she can like me, she's so warm and gorgeous and full of life, I'm being a dork," thing." Which made Lexi blush bright red.
Good, because Lexi had a lot of affection to share and wanted to lavish about 99% of it on Luz.
"I'll sit there, envious, and eat the chicken," Lexi replied, making a face.
"Honestly? Me neither. Every occasion I've had where it's been served, I take a piece and kind of mash it up with my fork to make it look like I ate some. Give me latkes any day of the week."
Wasn't that a universal childhood experience, to cry over that book? That and The Velveteen Rabbit. That one still made Lexi cry.
"No, mon étoile. It doesn't mean dummy," she said with a broad grin.
"Sure, why not! It can be an adorable couple language brawl. Maybe even in front of other people. No, especially in front of other people," Lexi declared.
And now I feel dumb since I actually MEANT Alanna Davis, not Miles.
"Exactly. And then there's another problem: sometimes you have to know WHEN to get involved, to stop them from doing something desperate. People aren't easy to predict all the time, and they can sometimes make the worst decisions for themselves. If I'm honest, I'm kinda not detached from that problem."
Luz knew she should probably try to sparse out her own issues, but at the same time? Lexi was her girlfriend. She ought to know, to an extent, exactly the kind of person she was. It might mean it would freak her out, but it would better than having it be a surprise.
And that was something Luz was starting to understand too: that Lexi wanted to help, and she ought to let her.
To Luz, it was hard not to see than in Lexi. She was already engaging and warm and funny, and then she had things that she couldn't deny: cheeks that warmed because of her words, skin that Luz wanted to stare at all day, eyes that she found herself lost in.
Lexi was pretty when Luz first met her, but getting to know her? Luz found her beautiful and it made her heart skip a little just to see her every day.
"I'm still working on that, Lex. I like to make people feel happy, so I don't really want to stay in a place where I only think of my own problems. But I promise, I'll try to work on them, with your help. I wouldn't want to keep things from you. I'll tell you anything!"
And here Luz looked so earnest it would have been mad to doubt her.
"Oh. Uh, yeah, no thanks. Hilarity and nonsense with bad words is one thing, but love scenes? Those belong in actually well done stories. In the wrong situation, they'd just be all awkward and stuff."
The last thing she wanted was to watch a movie throwing in a love scene so it inadvertently made her think of Lexi and make everything even MORE strange.
"Are you crazy? You looked all sun kissed and smart and you were so funny! I found myself wanting to talk to you more and more! At first, I thought I just wanted you to be my friend, but then I kinda dared to imagine looking up at you and sweeping you in my arms. It just felt...right, and I went crazy thinking I might lose you as a friend, but I needed to TRY."
Luz would take all of it happily Lexi. No problem there.
"If you say so. I love chicken, but it is absolutely not shellfish."
Not that you couldn't do a LOT with chicken. It was just different.
"Those latkes were amazing," Luz agreed. "I had to keep reminding myself that they were for other people!"
Absolutely. And if you wanted a little older trauma, Bridges of Terebithia was always there!
"Oh, I figured not! I was just referring to me!"
Was that much better, Luz?
"Oh, you really want to put that on people? Heh. You're so lucky that being with you makes that so easy!"
it's okay, we all make mistakes. myself included. ;)
It was all right. Lexi knew. It had been one of the strongest attractions to her, that she was so open and honest and real with everyone. Even though her willingness to say that everything was fine even when it wasn't worried Lexi and made her feel like a violently protective girlfriend.
It was true. Lexi wanted to help. She was through with being on the sidelines.
If Luz told Lexi all of that, she'd probably die of blushing. But in a good way. And honestly, the feeling was mutual. Lexi could stare at Luz for days, her bright eyes and lovely complexion, and warm, eager smile. Luz dressed 'down,' but couldn't disguise her natural beauty.
And Luz made Lexi feel warm all over. Which was a good thing. And she couldn't help grinning like an idiot around Luz, proud that this girl had chosen her to fall for. And hoping that Lexi lived up to that.
Lexi's eyes were soft. "I know you wouldn't. You're not that kind of person. You feel...everything so strongly and so openly. It's really brave. I hope you know that."
Lexi winced with sympathy. "Oh, I know. One night, we were watching the movie version of 'Watchmen' and it has this long, unsexy sex scene and it last for fucking ever. I felt so awkward, I wound up going to the kitchen to microwave popcorn and get everyone refills and when I came back it was still going on! Yecch. I don't know, maybe I should take a vote for the bad movie? Let people suggest shitty movies and let them debate each other."
If that ever happened, Lexi would be staring at a fixed point somewhere above the screen while she turned scarlet.
Lexi leaned in to nuzzle Luz's cheek. "And I'm so glad you were brave. Because I was feeling the exact same way, only I was like. There's no way she's gonna be into you, you're telling yourself what you wanna hear."
"Believe me, you're not telling me anything I haven't told myself a billion times."
Lexi shrugged and grinned. "Well, if you want, I can always make more for you and you alone."
And the end to the Chronicles of Narnia, only that made her mad more than it made her sad.
"Ohhh. Well, I don't let people badtalk my girlfriend. That includes my girlfriend," Lexi stated in a faux-stern mode.
"I do! People who are multilingual can figure it out but not cheat and just tell us. And we'll have a long list of things to have translated later on." In other words, good and nerdy fun!
Ty very much!
Luz was glowing with the praise, as Lexi's opinion mattered to her a lot. She still needed to work a lot on herself, she knew that much, but she was going to do her best there. With Lexi around, Luz could feel herself trying to be better at trying not to needlessly endanger herself.
And Luz was all for that, even if it, like Lexi, would make her worry more!
Luz couldn't help that. It was one look at Lexi and one conversation and she'd found herself smitten. Everything afterward was trying to pretend it wasn't happening so she wouldn't ruin their budding friendship, only to find they were both feeling the same way!
Luz just hoped that nothing in the future would test the boundaries of their relationship too badly. It was a faint hope, but she had it nonetheless.
"I do my best!"
Luz made a face. "Oh right, Watchmen. That's the movie where they showed the two lesbians killed with the 'lesbian whores' written on them. I remember that because I stopped watching afterward. It's probably a good film, but I don't like THAT, where straight people have to introduce gay characters to be killed. Not my cup of tea."
And even more so now that she knew about that bad sex. Yuck.
Luz laugh sounded like a bark. "What?! Really? I thought you were out of my league! I figured there was no way someone like you was going to be the kind of girl I could talk to for hours AND be into me! I was so happy to find out I was wrong!"
"Are you sure about that? Should I come up with something new, then?"
She shook her head. "Only when you feel inclined! I wouldn't want them more than once or twice a year. That way they feel more special!"
Luz could have written a whole book on her own fixing the ending WITHOUT throwing Susan to the proverbial wolves in the name of Christian allegory, thank you.
"Who am I to argue against a girl that knows me that well! But seriously, I appreciate that sweetie, thank you."
Luz's eyes were positively shining right now.
"Ooh, a challenge where I get to say secret adoring things about my gorgeous girlfriend? Sign me up!"
❤
While at the same time, Lexi was far more willing to put herself at risk, knowing that it was to protect Luz. Dying wasn't a big deal here, right? Go to sleep, be a squid for a little while, done. She could do that. She could do a lot of things, as long as Luz was kept safe.
Lexi was much the same, twitterpated at the young woman she'd talked to without being able to tell herself or anyone else why. She was certain she was theh only one who felt that way until Luz made her move. Then it was like plunging head-first into the ocean waves, depending on her own ability to swim to keep her head above water. Only in the best way possible.
It likely was a false hope. She didn't know anyone whose relationship hadn't been tested. But she was of the opinion that it was kind of like a broken bone: it would heal back twice as strong in the end.
"Sure did! Granted, the original comic was written sometime in the eighties, there was no way they'd let a lesbian character or two have a happy ending. Even now, the whole bury your gays trope seems to reign supreme," Lexi said with a roll of her eyes.
"So was I! And I thought that you were out of my league! Someone so popular, so well-respected, no way in hell she'd be interested in me. You can't imagine my relief when it turned out I was wrong," Lexi replied tenderly.
That was Lexi's problem. Oh noes, she was interested in boys and make-up. Not like a good Christian girl! The horrors!
"No arguments at all, that's where. And I love you. The least I can do is take care of you when you need it," Lexi said earnestly.
"Pretty much! Although, I'm in on the game, too, expect a plethora of French sweet talk in the near future!"
Ah, problematic Alan Moore. Also, I totally took offense at Susan's "fate" in The Last Battle.
Granted, Eda had known and cared a LOT about Fern and Varian too, so she at least knew them.
But Luz BETTER not hear that Lexi was thinking dying was OK. It might not have started her off with that horrible flu like in Deerington, but that didn't mean she wanted it happening to the girl she cared so much about.
It would have been a waiting game if Luz hadn't lived through Deerington. Back in the Isles, had she stayed, her stumbling into a girlfriend happened because of an interfering owl demon. But in Trench, in this reality, Luz had learned how important finding someone you care about was, and how rare.
She'd seen Varian and Fern's affection literally blossom before her eyes. She'd be stupid not to try for something like that of her own.
Luz didn't want to curse her own relationship of course: she just didn't want to act like it wouldn't be tested in the future.
"I guess it was 'of its time' or whatever, but it still seems like a rotten vehicle to frame in a story about mostly straight people and their complexities."
Luz would have been similarly shocked to learn about the one gay themed story that the same writer DID pen, specifically about the characters involved and how blatantly pornographic it was.
"Well respected?! Me?! Boy, someone's been lying to you!"
Luz laughed, but she was red because again, the praise was still so good for her.
"And me, not fall for you? That's just crazy. There's so much to love, I'd be out of my mind to let that go- to let YOU go."
Luz's voice got very small when she said this. It was partly because she was so tired, but more likely that Luz meant it and the words just came.
With Luz, it was more the indignance that because she found those things, suddenly her time as a literal QUEEN meant nothing to her. Maybe it was because of Luz stumbling into the Boiling Isles, but the idea that everything and everyone she'd met would suddenly be just some made up memory was an insult to her fiction loving self.
"You. Are. Amazing. I am totally and utterly devoted to you, Lexi Howard. I hope I always remind you of how special you are."
She smiled. "I look forward to it. Always meant to learn French anyway."
So did I! So I'm playing Queen Susan in another game with absolutely no intention of 'canon updatin
Dying to save the life of another? It wasn't a bad way to go, especially when the life being saved was your girlfriend. And Lexi was committed now, whatever weird shit happened, Lexi was by Luz's side.
As did Lexi. She'd spent way too much time pining over someone who'd never see her that way. Once she found someone who did, she'd rather eat broken glass than let Luz go. She loved Luz and Luz loved her. That was all there was to it, but so much more.
"I think so, too. Especially in the movie adaptation, they could've spent so much more time on what it meant to be a lesbian in that time period and how love did conquer all. And as I said, the bury your gays trope needs to be taken out back and shot. Like old yeller."
Lexi had actually read it on readcomicsonline. She didn't find it...fetishy, at least not really. And knowing that Alan Moore's own daughter was a lesbian helped her judge it more kindly. Maybe those were the types of bedtime stories she wished she had, as opposed to the compulsory heterosexuality of such tales.
"Oh, bullshit. People love you. They respect you. Deal with it," Lexi said with a smile and a laugh.
And Lexi said tenderly, "Funny, I was thinking the same about you. Oh well. Their loss is my present. Because you are a present, you're like all eight days of Hannukah and my birthday all at once." And she wanted Luz to believe it. That she was loved. That she was cared for. That she was worthy of love.
Lexi had considered it monumentally unfair. So Susan liked guys and makeup. That didn't make her a bad person. And the casual dismissal of her by who should have been her friends and family made Lexi see red.
"Luz. Noceda. I want you to know that I feel the same way. You're amazing and I'm completely devoted to you. I can't imagine living life without you being in it. Maybe that's foolish, considering where we are, but that's how I feel. I love you." And Lexi leaned in for a gentle kiss.
"See! Incentive! Like I'm trying to learn Spanish!"
That's the way to do it! Wooo!
And that someone was watching over her that wasn't her, and that was good too.
"Yeah. Second nature. I know what you mean."
Luz didn't want either of them to die, not at all...but if it came down to saving Lexi and dying by her side? Luz knew what she'd chose. It was easy.
Luz would never make the mistake of not showing her girlfriend what she meant to her. They had a bookshop and were constantly fussing over each other, and it just felt right. Somehow, it all just came together, and Luz didn't need to question it.
"Definitely. I'm glad we've moved from the time where it's ok to tell our stories, and that sometimes that doesn't have to mean we have to frame our romance around our sexuality either. We can just BE."
Luz would have seen as pornographic in NATURE. As far as the content and the actual story, that was something different. Luz would have loved it being Alice Liddel, Wendy Darling and Dorothy Gale. That concept alone would be the thing to draw Luz in: after all, in a sense it was like writing an AU fanfiction! With sex.
Luz would definitely be blushing a lot.
"I love them too, even if to a lot of them, I'm this dorky kid needing protecting all the time."
Luz laughed. "If that was in a movie, I would have thought that was a little dork-well, you know, maybe not. I can't help but appreciate the punnery of it. That it comes from you, that's what makes it wonderful."
The audacity that liking those things meant that Susan also couldn't remember being a queen is what filled Luz with indignation. Leave it to C.S. Lewis to have a weird thing about women he couldn't get away from.
Yes, Luz absolutely hated those thinly veiled sexist remarks.
"No, it's not foolish! I don't care. I love you. I see you and my stomach still turns in weird knots and sometimes I stare at you while I'm in the store still. I can't believe how lucky I am."
Luz pulled into the kiss, wrapping her arms around Lexi.
"Hehe. You're in my sick bubble, mi belleza de ojos oscuros.
'oh, is this YOUR character? hmm? MINE NOW."
As long as Lexi could, she'd watch Luz's back. And she knew that Luz would do the same for her. It was pretty much programmed into their DNA that way by this point. But like Luz, should the worst come to worse, Lexi also knows what she'd choose. Likely leading to an argument about who was going to die to save whom and a very confused and likely homicidal third party.
They were like an old married couple, despite being in their mid teens. In the best possible sense of the phrase. And it was a breath of fresh air compared to the toxic, dysfunctional relationships it seemed like everyone she knew back home were embroiled in.
"Exactly! Our preferences are part of who we are, not the whole lump sum. I've tried watching some shows from the nineties and early aughts about LGBTQ people and it's like that's the only personality trait the characters have! Frustrating and reductive," Lexi said with a decisive nod.
...no one mention fanfiction with sex in front of Lexi, she'd read far too much of that as a young teen trying to figure out her identity.
"Nothing wrong with being dorky. I'm dorky, after all. But you can more than take care of yourself. I have confidence in you and you should too."
"Oh, good, because I was worried that was a little too punny even for us. But you liked it! That's the important part," Lexi said as though that settled everything. Because it did.
CS Lewis would have a coronary if he'd ever seen the Disney Princess line, since that depended upon being as beautiful and desirable to men as possible. Even if that wasn't the outwardly stated goal, it had been what Lexi (and Cassie. and probably most girls who grew up with Disney Princesses) had internalized. That there was something wrong with you if you didn't fit into that mold.
"That's a relief because that's how I feel about you, too. All butterfly-y and giddy when I remember that you love me. I...never really thought I'd be this lucky. At least not now, I figured I wouldn't find someone who got me until at least college."
And Lexi looped her arms around Luz's waist, leaning her forehead against Luz's.
"Oh, oh, I got one of those words. Granted, variations of belle meaning beauty aren't that uncommon, but I still got it."
Well that's what you get for pushing Christian allegory over actual character development!
There wasn't even a debate here. Luz would have Lexi's back, and should it come to it, she would have happily died in Lexi's embrace. Lexi's beautiful face would be the last memory she's want before turning into a squid.
Luz had never understood how old married couples were looked down upon, especially when divorce seemed to be so common these days. With Lexi, every day felt like some new adventure in learning more about her. She never had a dull day with her in it.
"Exactly! You think that'd be more of an eighties thing, but I guess it carried over for some time, probably because they were still scared about what other people would think. So everything about being gay had to center AROUND a character, and actually make us more than one dimensional."
Which Luz was glad they had moved on from. Mostly.
Luz would absolutely do that now.
"And look at you, Lexi! Doing magic now, being a powerhouse all your own! Are you kidding?! You already had the confidence, now you have the strength right along with it!"
Luz nodded eagerly. Even Eda and King would have regaled Lexi with stories of Luz's foray into puns.
Luz would have argued that Lewis had NO problem with princesses being desirable and pretty, so long as they stayed within those confines of being meek and dutiful. Only if they scruffy and "fought as well as a boy" could they be allowed to act outside of their sex roles.
"I feel exactly the same way," Luz said. "I mean, I just said it, but still. A part of me still feels like it's too good to be true. That I found someone in this crazy place who loves me and wants to take care of me for me!"
And now Luz is red and beaming from ear to ear, holding her girlfriend close.
"Good! Pretty soon you'll have all of them down, and you'll always know what I'm calling you.
Yeah, it's weird, baby me didn't get the allegory at all and now it's all but jumping up and down!
Then they were in the weirdest standoff, each willing to die for the other while being comforted by the notion of the other living. She wanted Luz to live. That was all there was to it. Luz's housemates had been through enough, Luz's friends had been through enough, Lexi considered herself expendable. Not because insecurities from home had trained her to think of herself that way, but because the way she observed how many loved and worried after Luz had.
It was Lexi's #goals to be part of an old married couple and to be part of one at the age of seventeen was the coolest thing ever. She was happy to be the way she was with Luz and if anyone poo-poohed their devotion to each other at their young age, Lexi would probably unleash a profanity laden diatribe that would leave their ears ringing.
"Yeah, I mean which year did gay marriage become legal in the US? And how many countries haven't followed suit yet? So most of us haven't grown up with it and have grown up with gay stereotypes which help no one and are actively harmful in the worst case scenario."
Lexi ducked her head, blushing fiercely. "All because of you, ma chouchoute." Then Lexi had to think a moment. "That and my practice with telekinesis getting the better of me."
Because to sound totally corny, but Luz was the wind beneath her wings. Or whatever the hedgehog equivalent may be, Orville obviously pleased with the direction this conversation was going, if the way he was snuffling into Lexi's hair was any sign.
That would be a good point. But still, she doubted he'd like Mulan, even if she did fight as well as a boy. That being the main reason why the handsome suitor was attracted to her would confuse him.
And Lexi's arms tightened around Luz's waist. "It's not too good to be true. Unless it's too good to be true for me, too."
"I hope so. I don't think anything could be as big of a motivator than to be curious about the pet names my girlfriend gives to me!" And Lexi giggled girlishly.
Oh, I had rose colored glasses about Narnia for years. It hits different now!
It was not a strange thing for Luz to want to die for her friends. Most of the time, she risked life and limb to help them, because that was just what you did to show them how much you cared about them, right? That was what Luz had initially thought. Seeing that reflected back at her made her realize how much people cared about HER, and how much she had to lose.
Luz didn't know how to put a name or a label on what she and Lexi had: she just knew that it felt right to her, and that she was hopelessly devoted to helping making Lexi's goals happen. There was nothing Luz wouldn't do to make Lexi happy.
"Twenty fifteen," Luz answered, sighing, "and we still have a LONG way to go, last I checked. Countries are going to have to go at it their own way: religion plays a big role, and so does the way the society in that country interprets what being gay means. Heck, its not like we're so much more evolved than them. Half of the country still has poo brain about a lot of issues, and they're still horribly regressive when it comes to trans people. We have a long way to go...or we WOULD, anyway, if we were still on Earth."
Did Luz have a lot of time to think about these kinds of things? Absolutely.
"Oh, I know that one," Luz said, nudging her forehead against Lexi's, "and I can't wait to see what you can do with your powers!"
Luz would absolutely love to be referred to in that way and would sing along with the song if only to remind Lexi how much she appreciated corny.
Orville was free to peruse Luz's hair at his leisure!
Luz would have countered that Mulan was fine being the way she was, as long as she reverted to her "normal" self. After all, there was Aravis and Lucy, who were more "masculine" while still reverting back to their femininity, either by marriage or by being turned back to her "real" age again.
"Then it won't be too good for either of us: it would be just perfect for us both!"
And that worked just fine for her.
"If you ever want to know what they mean, you can just ask me!" Luz said, giggling back. "But don't you tell me! I want to figure them out myself!"
so did I! but the his dark materials answer to it rang hollow to me as well.
And Lexi was used to being surrounded by dysfunctional people, people with problems and situations they couldn't overcome on their own. And most of them didn't even seem interested in becoming their best selves, content enough to wallow in dysfunction and toxicity. They were great examples of what Lexi wanted to avoid. She'd thought it was because her friends were immature only but she knew now that was only an excuse.
Love and girlfriends were good names for it? Lexi knew she wasn't ready for anything really physical beyond kisses and holding each other, but she knew that Luz respected that and felt the same. It was a near perfect meeting of minds and of needs. Even though each would be the other to take a killing blow for the other. Because the other was convinced that the world and their friends would be a better place with each other surviving over the other.
And there wasn't anything Lexi wouldn't do to keep Luz happy and safe. That was her north star, her compass' guiding point. Lexi was ready to call Luz her love, possibly (likely?) the love of her life. Which would have brought Lexi up short when they first got together, but she was willing to stay and deal with whatever the Pthumerians had to throw at them if it meant she could be with Luz.
"Oh, I know," Lexi said seriously. "Trench is like an LGBTQ paradise compared with all of the other worlds I've heard of. No one seems to bat an eyelash at two guys or two girls or--or more falling in love. And it's freeing, really freeing. I don't think I would've been ready for anything like this back home until I was away at college and able to just. Be me. With all that involved."
"But I won't give up. Not on us. We're a team, we're better together than we are apart."
Good, because Orville was climbing onto Luz's shoulder and was snuffling into her hair with a happy, contented look on his face.
Ugh, why were straight male writers like that? No, really, why?
Lexi grinned. "I like perfect. Perfect is one of my favorite words, even though it's impossible to get to. There's always the attempt to get there."
"Oh," Lexi's grin widened. "Sounds like both of us have to do a lot of the Trench version of googling, ma poupée."
They're both stories with kids pigeonholed into big things without really TALKING about being kids:(
It always bore repeating that Luz appreciated and loved Lexi for being her and letting Luz be herself too, just for listening and loving her back.
Luz knew dysfunction, knew that sometimes people could be the worst versions of themselves given the worst circumstances. She'd seen it, almost been killed by it several times, and learned that in a place like this, you absolutely needed patience and understanding. People needed time to grow, and they made mistakes, but they could be better if you lend a hand. With Lexi, she could expect the same kind of support. In Lexi's case though, she was a kid and NO ONE was putting her first.
Luz hated that, and was going to do her best to attempt the opposite.
Oh, Luz had certainly thought about it. She was a naturally curious and affectionate person, and while people had tended to sometimes make that moment seem all hormones, Luz saw more than that. It wasn't just the pleasure receptors but everything else that went with it. Luz saw the warmth in Lexi's eyes and wanted to be engulfed in them. She wanted to make Lexi feel like the best person on earth. Gosh, there were times where Lexi's smell and just kissing her soft skin sent super tingles in Luz, and made her all snuggly.
But she knew that this didn't need to be pushed. They would when they were both ready. Everything about this, where she could take in moments being cared for Lexi and talk with her about things they could do or what they could talk about together? It never failed to make Luz feel happy and cared for. It was everything.
This was love. How could it not be, balancing yourself between infatuation and care, of talking about everything and taking on anything the world could throw at you with open eyes. Luz didn't know she could feel like this, that love was so comforting and so enormous at the same time. It was staggering, and she relished every minute.
"Right?! I couldn't believe that people could just love! There wasn't any of this 'but some invisible god doesn't think it's good' conversation! It's just love! Because that is literally what it comes down to: who you like and how you vibe! It doesn't have to be anything more complicated than that!"
Luz had been desperate for that kind of acceptance, not just with her preferences but as a person. Over time she learned some of that sometimes came from you, and it took time to unlearn some of the worst things about yourself.
"Give up on us? Oh please, we're precious! Even if no one things so, I do! Also, yes, I'm sure if we ever have to get into an actual fight, we'll be a great team!"
Aw, Orville. Luz's eyes are shining with adoration toward Orville. Why were animals all so precious?!
It was probably their way of enforcing a way of the world as they saw it. It worked for them, so it should be applied to everyone and the world would function correctly.
It was shortsighted, and just showed that writers needed to actually do their work in thinking outside of themselves, and listen to other people's point of views.
Luz smiled back warmly. "Yeah. I think we could do that. Try."
Luz bit her lip. "Uh. Is it weird that for a moment, I thought you were calling me your 'poopy?'"
Pretty much! And I'm a pantheist so neither option seems appropriate to me.
How could Lexi not love Luz? From the moment they met, Lexi had felt a spark and had tried to convince herself that it was only her, that she was fooling herself. But she wasn't and Lexi couldn't be happier to be wrong.
Lexi was used to being on the back-burner of people's attention. She didn't like it, but she was used to it. The notion of Luz putting her first was a revelation, an entirely welcome one.
And Lexi was glad that Luz was willing to take things at their own pace. All she could think of was Cassie, whose boyfriends would record nudes of her, then upload them to the internet, despite the fact that Cassie was absolutely not old enough for such a thing. Not that she thought Luz would do anything like that, but she'd been burned by her sister's experiences and wanted to avoid anything like it as long as she could.
Lexi giggled. "It's not, but you know how people like to overcomplicate things. It's like human nature."
"I know we're precious, too! Anyone who says otherwise will be glared at until they agree. I know I would and I figure you would, too!"
Orville was particularly adorable with his little spines keeping people at a supposed distance, only to have such warm and almost human eyes and a smile to match.
And Lexi's smile warmed further. "I think we can. Who knows, maybe there will be a Trench prom. In that case, I'm putting us in as prom queens together."
She sputtered with laughter. "No! Oh my god, no! I mean, I can see where you're coming from, but no!"
Re: Pretty much! And I'm a pantheist so neither option seems appropriate to me.
Luz had known, even as she acted like it wasn't attraction, that there was something there. She had also been quick to act on those feelings and get exposed, so she wanted to be careful about how she approached telling Lexi.
Luckily for her, she hadn't had to worry: they were both crazy for each other. She would always, without fail, put Lexi first.
Luz had been told that story about Cassie and understood the implication: that someone could take something as intimate as love making and put it on display, as a way to shame that person. It was a betrayal of the worst kind, and Luz wouldn't want to ever put Lexi through anything reminding her of that.
"It doesn't have to be anything crazy. Now, with us that's different. I could probably write sonnets about you and how you make me feel. Love is a big feeling, for anyone who gets to have it."
Luz just gave her girlfriend a playful smile. "I'll let you do the glaring and trash taking, you're way better at it than I am!"
Luz didn't appear to mind the spinies no matter how many times they nicked her, likely due to helping her mother in the veterinary office all the time.
"Oh, that would be great! I already went to a Grom back on the Isles, it would be awesome to have one in Trench too!"
Luz looked innocent. "I'm just repeating what I heard."
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And Lexi felt the same way about Luz, feeling that friendship turn into attraction within the friendship. Though, she wasn't sure she'd ever have gathered the courage to say something if Luz hadn't said something first.
What happened to Cassie made Lexi kind of afraid of relationships for a long while. If someone who claimed to love her sister could do that to her, Lexi was afraid she'd end up the same way. And granted, it seemed like a guaranteed pathway to fame and influence on Instagram was to show as much skin as possible without being completely out there, but honestly? Lexi mostly followed celebrity cats and dogs on Instagram and was happier for it.
"Sonnets about me? How can I pass that up? Though, I'm terrible at poetry other than haiku. I like the structure it requires. So if you want haiku about your beauty and our love, all you have to do is say the word," Lexi offered shyly.
And that made Lexi laugh gleefully, unabashedly. "Deal. And you'll do all of the sweet talking."
Orville was a gentle hedgehog. Much like his person. He loved to show affection towards Luz, just as Lexi loved to show affection to her.
"Then...maybe it's a good idea? Something to plan? After bad movie night, that comes first." Lexi didn't think she'd be herself if she didn't have a plan. Except for when Luz smiled at her, then all of her carefully formulated plans went out of the window, replaced by 'pretty and she loves me. ❤"
Lexi couldn't help grinning. "You---you---oh, c'mere!" And it was time for another kiss.
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Luz had taken a chance. It was a gamble, and she would never regret that it had worked! She was much happier than she'd been in a long time!
That was a betrayal of trust that Luz could understand might put off a lot of people off being that vulnerable with anyone. It might not have been her, but she understood why Lexi would be completely turned off from being that intimate too soon.
Luz nodded happily. "Just don't hold me to that, my brain is full of goo right now, thanks to the sickness."
Luz gave her girlfriend a sweet smile. "Aww, thankies, love! I'll be extra sweet, just for you!"
And Luz loved to cuddle the little guy! He was so cute!
"You think we could put something like that into play? That'd be interesting! We'd have to find an ideal location of course, probably get a DJ and everything, but it would be really nice, wouldn't it?"
Ah, so Lexi had that happen to her too then.
"Oh, no, not another kiss. Have mercy, I'm sick!"
Which is why Luz wriggled in closer to Lexi, of course.
(CW: underage nudes, revenge porn)
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(CW: drug dealers)
Re: (CW: drug dealers)
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(CW: mental illness--depression)
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[CW: blood/talk of killing/torture].
[CW: blood/talk of killing/torture].
CW: Feelings of unworthiness/depression/
CW: Feelings of unworthiness/depression/
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(CW: domestic abuse)
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(CW: underage drinking, A+ parenting)
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