reddosmod: (Default)
Deer Country Mod ([personal profile] reddosmod) wrote in [community profile] deercountry2021-11-08 02:50 pm

No tears, please. It's a waste of good suffering.

NOVEMBER 2021 EVENT
IMAGE DESCRIPTORS IN ORDER OF APPEARANCE

Prompt One
[Image One: Red mushrooms with white spots growing rapidly.]
[Image Two: Mushrooms on log with morning mist. ] Within Prompt: Orange mushrooms walking on small, greenfeet. Jellyfish-like mushroom with mini-mushrooms growing on top. Vine-like mushrooms with clear heads. Blue mushrooms.

Prompt Two
[Image One: Corpse pinned to chainlink fence with man standing in front.]
[Image Two: Limbless, headless, semi-naked bloody bodies wiggling in walls.]

Prompt Three
[Image One: Disfigured humanoid with skin stretched over eyes and chattering, exposed teeth.]
[Image Two: Large organ-like structure pulsating with a human head attached on top via metal contraption.]

MUSHABOOMING
WHEN: Month of November
WHERE: Everywhere
CONTENT WARNINGS: Poisonous mushrooms that induce paralysis and suffocation and violent hallucinations.


Come November, Trench is flourishing with a wide variety of mushrooms. Mushrooms can be found growing in the woods, around your house, and maybe even on your house if you're especially lucky...Or unlucky, depending on the type of mushroom.

The mushroom is considered to be arguably the most important food source in Trench. It's the easiest to find and grow, and one of the easiest to harvest. It's a dependable source of protein and can fill people up. They are filled with vitamins that directly help your blood and heart health and can help keep your digestive system on track. But not everyone is a mushroom farmer and most Trenchies wind up foraging for their own mushrooms. Woven baskets are sold just about everywhere to help forage. Omens are extremely good at scenting out edible mushrooms.

The following edible mushrooms can be found/grown throughout Trench: button, portobello, cremini, oyster, chanterelle, porcini, black trumpets, morels, enoki, shimeji, shiitake, and giant puffballs. If you are extremely lucky, you might even find rare truffles. Truffles can be exchanged for highly valuable goods such as magnificent jewels and specialized weapons. Or you can keep the truffles to yourself and use them in a nice dish.

It is said there are hundreds of unique species of mushrooms to Trench. The following mushrooms are permanent features in Trench and can be found most commonly during Bone Season:

WALKING TERRORS

These parasitic mushrooms seem to "walk" around the forest floor. Arcane scholars have determined that their motion is actually just a natural response to stimuli in the environment and helps the fungi to spread its spores onto living hosts. Once you have been exposed to a cloud of these spores, you will immediately begin to hallucinate the world around you warping into a terrifying hellscape. Some say that Walking Terrors have driven people to beasthood in a matter of minutes. But there is a huge benefit to finding Walking Terrors: their caps, once dried and crushed down, are an ample treatment option for corruption. The tricky part is actually getting them. Covering your entire body, head to toe, completely is one way of avoiding the spores and probably the easiest way. Does anyone have a hazmat suit? Another option is knowing a darkblood or someone with similar abilities who can manipulate the direction of the spores in the air by pushing them away. Once the caps have been removed from the rest of the mushroom, the spores seem to lose their nightmarish quality and, at most, will just make you sneeze.


FLOATERS

These mushrooms come out exclusively at night and float lazily through the air. They bob and bump around, their tentacles searching for something to cling to and settle on. They mostly search for tree branches but have been known to accidentally cling to animals and people. The tentacles paralyze any sentient being it lands on. The good thing is that the cap and the little mushrooms on top are completely harmless to touch so if you have a buddy around, they can pull them off with no problem. You'll regain the ability to move your body a few seconds after the tentacles have been removed. The paralytic quality of these tentacles do not impact vilebloods. These mushrooms dried out and cooked are said to amplify electric abilities in coldbloods for a short moment of time. They can also be used to enchant an item with paralytic properties.


WEEPERS

These rare mushrooms can pop up just about anywhere. Only one grows every hundred feet or so and they don't get any bigger than a penny. Weepers are highly sought after since they have been known to greatly reduce corruption. Consuming a Weeper raw will immediately calm someone down, get rid of any current anxiety, wash away depression and paranoia, and clear the mind of hallucinations. Weepers can sharpen the mind and help increase focus. The effect lasts for days and sometimes even weeks. It isn't a permanent cure but it sure beats having a panic attack. Weepers can be collected and saved indefinitely. There are no other uses for them than mental relief, and they must be consumed raw. Cooking a Weeper will get rid of its healing properties - but it does add great flavor to a dish! If a mentally stable person eats them, there will be no effect.


BLUE CHEEKS

These radiant mushrooms grow in clusters on healthy trees and seem to thrive among vegetation. You might find Blue Cheeks in your own garden. They are certainly pretty, but you don't want to eat these. They will cause you to slowly suffocate - even if you don't typically need to "breathe" in the traditional way. It's an agonizing way to go. Your body will start to experience micro-seizures as it locks up, your throat slowly closing up, lungs squeezing inward. It will begin to feel like someone is sitting on your chest and there will be no relief. Your cheeks start to turn blue. Most who eat Blue Cheeks wind up dead, but if someone forcibly makes you vomit shortly after consuming a Blue Cheek, you may be able to survive. Some harvest Blue Cheeks and smash them up to coat their weapons in the jelly-like substance. This substance causes the same effect but must be used while the Blue Cheek jam is still wet. It will stay wet for an hour.

THE SLEEPER FARM
WHEN: Month of November
WHERE: Everywhere + The Sleeper Farm
CONTENT WARNINGS: Kidnapping, claustrophobia, harvesting blood/organs, imprisonment, temporary nerf of powers, blood sacrifice, brief amnesia, confusion, loss of time, breathing in blood, treatment of humanoids(?) like livestock, themes of meat markets, themes of torture, mutilated corpses, mutilating injuries.


The blood pollution is thick this month and the more a Sleeper is exposed, the more a Sleeper will find themselves falling into a strange stupor. You seem to forget what you were doing, where you are, what time it is. You will find it increasingly difficult to use your blood powers. Some may lose their new abilities entirely. It's like trying to wake up from a deep dream, everything's sluggish and hazy.

Then you blink. That's all. Maybe you went to sleep or wash your face. When you open your eyes again, you're somewhere else entirely and have no recollection of how you got there. Your body has a deep ache, you're filthy, hungry, and feel like it's somehow been days. You have nothing on you except a drab red jumpsuit. No shoes. No Omni. No weapons.

THE STALLS: 1st FLOOR


If you're lucky, you wake up in a stall with another Sleeper (or more). You can hear and feel the dull vibration of heavy machinery chugging around you; you can smell oil and something thick and musty fermenting.

You are in some way restrained upon waking, whether through shackles to the wall, one another, or some other means. Whatever put you here doesn't want you to escape. You can barely access your powers (for now), but maybe you can find help in nearby Sleepers.

Once you escape, you almost wish you had stayed in your stall. The stalls are the only thing that's farmlike about the Sleeper Farm. It's an architectural masterpiece of steel pistons gyrating, metal staircases heading in every direction, steam-powered doors that exhale open upon an approach. Oil drips continually from above, like filthy rainfall, but every now and then, so does blood of all kind. Never enough to detect the source immediately though.

Your only real option left is to...explore. And this metal palace is huge. You will find various tools for construction around: wrenches, hammers, saws, nails, anything you'd find at a hardware store. You could come across workboots, protective gloves, helmets with lights. The metal around you is boiling hot, and if you're not careful, getting burns is all too easy. You can hear something banging around above. You may even see movement through metal slots of humanoids rushing away. Then you start to find the source of the blood...

STORAGE: 2-9th Floors


Sleepers have been strung up in various locations. Maybe they are ones you recognize, maybe they are you (if you're unlucky enough to wake up like that), or maybe they are completely foreign to you, maimed beyond recognition. Many have been pinned up and mutilated in some way, whether fully skinned and bled dry, or body parts removed, skin carved into. Some have buckets beneath them to collect blood while others seem to have been decoratively destroyed. There is no saving some, but there is saving many. Some might have only just been strung up, still alive, still fully intact, and without any harm done just yet...But no matter what, most won't remember how they got there.

The further you go, the more bodies you come across. Some bodies have been rolled up into bags and tossed into empty rooms in piles. The floor is slick with blood, and the metal maze becomes increasingly complex with tighter turns and thicker blood pollution. It becomes difficult to breathe without ingesting in some kind of blood - but on the other hand...Your powers begin to work because of it. You can start to feel it coming back to you. You can feel yourself slowly start to regain your strength. Which is probably for the best, since you're not out of this hell just yet.

BLOOD HARVEST: 10th Floor


You enter a perfect, circular room built out of pure bloodstone from the different blood types, neatly flushed together in a mesmerizing display of artistry and architecture. At the center of a room is an enormous golden statue of The Tower, hands held out with palms open.

Filling the palms of the statue and surrounding the base of the Tower are hundreds of organs, perfectly intact, given to the statue in sacrifice. The miraculous thing, however, is the fact that most of the organs still seem to be functioning - or at the very least, they aren't rotting the way they should be. It isn't something one wishes to look at for too long.

More importantly, are the five doors that represent the five different blood types. Each door is made from the same gray wood, but with a single bloodstone in the center. Beyond the door is where you come to discover the true horror of where you are.

You're in a Sleeper Farm. Sleepers have been organized by blood types into a vast room. Some cannot be saved, opened up on tables, their organs already carved out and given over to the sacrifice. Others are still alive, but hooked up to tubes, their blood being pumped into vats kept in the ceiling. More disturbingly are the bodies of Sleepers that barely look like Sleepers at all anymore - they have been stripped so thoroughly of everything, left like hunks of meat on hooks. There are fires stoked towards the back, with shelves of jars with blood vials and bloodstones.

It's probably time to wonder who did this to you. Who brought you to this place?

And probably how the hell you get out.

QUICK FACTS

1. To avoid this prompt, you can simply handwave your character getting lucky or Wearing a gas mask and full facial/bodily coverage to help keep the likelihood of blood pollution impact lower.

2. If characters don't have eyes, any variation of vulnerability will count (ie; turning away from something, putting on headphones, etc).

3. Characters cannot have their Omni or any other item in this prompt except items they find along the way. They can still summon their Omens. Omens can help guide Sleepers, and provide communication. One can use Omens to transmit messages to the Network. However, characters cannot find their way to this location from outside. This is a by-chance location.

4. You can choose your character's level of restraint (muzzles/handcuffs/etc) and how easily they can escape them (maybe the shackles can be broken apart with enough strength or you need a nearby key).

5. Those whose Patron is the Tower will be able to more easily navigate the Sleeper Farm and figure out its continually moving parts. They may get a "telepathic" swaying by the Tower to go in the right direction. They will also instinctively know that they are inside the Tower's body in some way.

6. Characters can wake up in any part of the Tower and experience this prompt multiple times.

7. To get out, one must sacrifice some sort of blood or an organ directly to the Tower whether their own or someone else's. This will transport a Sleeper back into town in a random location. Alternatively: Moon Presence will be saving Sleepers by "pulling" them out of this place at random. It will feel a lot like traveling through the lamps, but Sleepers will realize it's the Moon Presence instead. She will place them back in their homes. This can be done at any time.

8. This prompt is meant to go hand-in-hand with the third prompt, but it is not required to engage with both.

BLOOD CRAZED ZEALOTS
WHEN: Month of November
WHERE: ???? Everywhere and the Sleeper Farm
CONTENT WARNINGS: Severe disorientation, psychological horror, paradoxical horror, feelings of being trapped/lost, Cenobites/beings with extreme bodily modifications, themes of mental and physical torture.


You are not alone in the Sleeper Farm, and someone powerful has brought you here. It wasn't the Tower though. It was someone obsessed with the Tower. Or...obsessed with blood.

They lurk throughout Trench, never letting themselves be known until they want to be known. They abduct Sleepers in the blink of an eye, masters of reality-bending and experts of blood abilities.

Meet the Blood-Crazed Zealots.

Or, as you will come to learn through various interactions, ancient Sleepers who have been exposed to blood pollution for far too long and who have been completely corrupt by it. These are masters of their blood magic, darkblood magicians who can snap their fingers and rip a Sleeper off the streets. Palebloods who can make you forget who you are, where you are. Vilebloods who have mastered the exact skill of extracting blood and harvesting it for bloodstones and sacrifices. Warmbloods who have gladly given their bodies up to power the Tower. Coldbloods who keep the metal machinery of the Sleeper Farm running perfectly.

These are the Sleepers who learned to survive in a different way, Sleepers who learned to cohesively blend their skills together to not only survive but excel. Most have completely disfigured themselves, claiming it to be an act of religious commitment to the "Patron Pthumerians that guide us."

The Blood Crazed Zealots believe that they must continually sacrifice Sleepers to the Tower primarily in order to keep the city of Trench strong against corruption. And the thing is...They technically aren't wrong. The Bone Season is when Trench becomes the weakest, so the Blood Crazed Zealots work overtime to get the blood pumping into the streets.

These beings are naturally sadistic, uninterested in compassion. Yet they show the potential for what Sleepers could learn, and if you're clever enough, you may even be able to get a Blood Crazed Zealot to pause and teach you a thing about your own blood type. They are ruthless and powerful, but far from irrational or stupid. Corrupt they may be, senseless they are not.

Some of you may wake up to one of these creatures torturing you or torturing a friend. You may catch them in the streets of Trench, turning a corner, and that may be your chance to follow them into the Sleeper Farm by stepping into the black holes they leave in their wake when teleporting.

The Blood Crazed Zealots can summon hooks from nowhere and snare you in their traps. They can get extremely creative and oftentimes will enjoy dragging out the agony. They know how to drain Sleepers of their blood and their powers...So how is one to even combat one of these?

Use their own game against them, of course. Blood is power and you might as well use yours. Blood Crazed Zealots are tied to their word and obey the law of the blood. If you create a blood oath with one of these Blood Crazed Zealots that's just clever enough, you may be able to protect yourself and a few others. But be careful. Blood oaths with Blood Crazed Zealots can have loopholes. Ask to be set free and they might let your body go, but keep your mind to drive you insane.

Despite their power, they are still limited in what they can do. They can't be everywhere at once, and one can hide from them. They can even be killed if a Sleeper properly regains their strength.

QUICK FACTS

1. You can create your own variation of a Blood Crazed Zealot. Their general concept is inspired by cenobites, but the general concept is a humanoid-being who looks like they have sacrificed a good deal of their body.

2. They will communicate this information openly to Sleepers who ask about it as well as tell Sleepers about other lore and facts about blood types/the Pthumerians.

3. Their powers are based on regular blood type powers (ie; a coldblood BCZ could torture people with electricity.) Some are much weaker than others.

4. They would not accept a new Sleeper who wanted to become "one of them" since they are created after decades of exposure to blood pollution.

5. People can run into these both in the Sleeper Farm and in Trench. One could convince a Blood Crazed Zealot to bring them to the Sleeper Farm in order to save others.
CODING
shiro2hero: (really really tingling)

B - probably well after the 21st

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-17 07:42 pm (UTC)(link)
[Worried? Shiro? No, never. Not possible! Except it was, and that was what led him to... well. He thinks it's a lived-in house. He's honestly not entirely sure. One quick conversation hadn't been all that reassuring, and the sight of the house is... hm. Concerning.]

[Still, he shoulders the adorable little deer backpack he'd gotten, years ago now, from Sodder, the contents gently clinking together inside. And knocks. Maybe it's the wrong place. Maybe he should be a couple doors down.]

[Only one way to find out, right?]


Hey, it's Shiro. Anyone in?
chickenchoicejudy: If It Makes You Happy - Michael Cera Palin (I've been long)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-18 05:00 am (UTC)(link)
[It's occurring to Ryan that perhaps he should have asked Shiro to meet with him somewhere else. That's probably a bad plan too though - everywhere is still dangerous with the zealots roaming around and stealing people away. It's just that...well, he knows he didn't make the greatest choice in living arrangements. It's just slightly better than it was thanks to some obviously-picked-by-Wu decorations, but it's still run down and decrepit.

But Ryan's also tired. He's been tired all week and if Shiro wants to swing by and drop something off for him, well. All the power to him. He was kind of ambivalent in his messages, insisting that he was "totally fine" post-kidnapping and that he "just got banged up a little; it's not that big a deal". And if the goal is to put Shiro's mind at ease, his apartment is not going to do that and he knows it.

But, he tries anyway and answers the door with a smile. He's wearing a loose, flowy peasant top so he can have easy access to a large bandage on his arm, but otherwise looks mostly unscathed.

(Though, the fact that there is a very broken staircase in full view of the door is probably not comforting in the slightest.)
]

I am! Come on in!

[He ushers him inside and shuts the door behind him. Despite his carefree act, he's actually been significantly more careful about that since he returned.]
shiro2hero: (i feel pretty and witty and)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-18 05:17 am (UTC)(link)
[So it is the right place. Shiro's suddenly not sure if he's relieved or more concerned than he'd been a moment ago. And, really, at first glance, Ryan does look okay. In one piece, anyway. There's no missing limbs, no horrible gaping wounds. Nothing looks too out of place.]

[Except. The staircase. That looks like it's about to fall apart.]


Hey, wasn't sure I had the right place. You're... doing some remodeling?

[Boy does he ever sound hopeful about that.]

[He slings the backpack off, digging around to offer the contents - several small mason jars. And one larger container that smells vaguely spicy, even through the seals.]


Brought you a couple things.
chickenchoicejudy: Ramblings of a Lunatic - Bears in Trees (Is to stop me diving deeply)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-18 05:33 am (UTC)(link)
[Well, that's a new reaction to his place. He tilts his head a bit, unsure if Shiro really thinks that or if he's just trying to be nice.]

...Noooo?

[He follows Shiro's gaze and oh, right. The stairs. He casually waves a hand.]

Eh. Stairs are overrated. It's not like I use that floor anyway.

[Obviously not, since anyone who tried would probably fall through the stairs and directly into the pits of hell if they tried. But he waves Shiro further into the house and away from the stairs.

Despite being here for a couple of months now, it still doesn't seem terribly lived in. The paint is peeling and there's a thin layer of dust on just about everything. The living room has a couch that's falling apart and none of the lights really seem bright enough. There are a couple of personal touches - red accent decorations that Wu got for him to make the place slightly less terrible - but not much beyond that.
]

Anyway, don't worry about the stairs. You said you brought some things? You totally didn't have to.

[He definitely seems very curious though. It takes a full beat for him to process what Shiro's carry everything in, and when he does he grins.]

Cute bag, by the way.
shiro2hero: (How long has that cow been there)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-18 05:45 am (UTC)(link)
[Shiro, very slowly, turns to look from the stairs to Ryan. And back again.]

Stairs... [He repeats, just as slowly.] Are overrated?

[He can't quite believe what he's hearing here. Maybe he misheard. Or maybe Ryan is just pulling his leg. Something like that. Why have an upper floor if you're not going to use it? What if the upstairs is just as deteriorated? The ceiling could come down.]

[Still, he follows, watching where he steps, where they're walking. With good reason, he thinks, eying that couch. Wow, suddenly his air mattress of six months seems luxurious.]


Did you just find this place? [Maybe that's... the issue here. He really hopes that's what's going on.] Do you need help with it?

Hm? Oh. Yeah, it's... it was from Sodder. Back in the dream. [He hands over one of the jars.] So was this. Honey - it'll help with any pain, or scarring. Use it sparingly.
chickenchoicejudy: Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy - Queen (Right after all)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-19 04:05 am (UTC)(link)
I mean...I just found it when I got to Trench? So, yeah. Like, a couple months ago.

[That still counts as "just finding it", right? He waves off the offer of help though. Shiro's already helping!]

I'm, uh. Not usually here a lot? So it's fine. It's just a place to crash.

[Except that he's here now, in the wake of his kidnapping. While the zealots are roaming it's not really safe for him to just be out all day, and he can only impose on Wu and Mako so much before it turns into flat-out moving in. But he shrugs.

Ryan doesn't know very much about Sodder, other than that she was pretty important to a lot of the people who came from Deerington, but he takes the jar and holds it carefully, looking at it with awe.
]

It helps with scarring? Really?

[Eddie already closed the wound, but there would still be a scar to show for it. It's admittedly also still a little tender, but he's just been walking it off. It'll heal.]

...Wait, why sparingly? What does it do?

[It's honey, how dangerous could it be?]
shiro2hero: (WHADDA FUCK CHILDE)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-19 04:40 am (UTC)(link)
And... no one's offered to help put it back together? Or anything?

[He's shocked Mako hasn't offered. That doesn't seem like him. Or Wu, even though the latter probably wouldn't be the ... best. At home improvement. Sorry, Wu, he remembers the smoothie attempts.]

[And then he shakes his head, firmly.] Ryan, even if you're just sleeping here, it should still be safe. [With his free hand, he gestures upward at the ceiling.] That looks ready to collapse, to be honest.

[Setting the bag and contents on... some surface that doesn't look liable to crumble, he nods.] Yeah, here... [It takes some doing, but he eventually gets the sleeve of his right arm rolled up to the shoulder. There's a thick ring of old scarring where the metal joins skin. Except for one patch - about the size of a quarter.] Tested it when I first got it... I think it did a pretty good job.

[Pushing his sleeve back down, he winces.]

Too much makes you think you're floating and talking to your dead uncle, apparently.
chickenchoicejudy: Art is Dead - Bo Burnham (Won't stop screaming)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-19 05:27 am (UTC)(link)
Well...Wu's helped a little?

[Ryan gestures vaguely at some of the decorations around, like the red curtains and other little touches here and there. Without those, the place would be even sadder-looking than it already is. At least now it looks like someone actually lives here.

He looks up as Shiro gestures at the ceiling. Shiro's...not wrong. The ceiling actually sags in one spot that looks particularly unsafe to stand under. Ryan just sort of shrugs, as though that's an acceptable thing to just sort of shrug about.
]

It's held up okay so far?

[It's the best answer he's got, really. What else can he say?

With the honey, he was expecting something more preventative. He actually gasps when Shiro shows him it works on older scars as well. There are marks that he would love to erase, ones that would take ages to completely vanish on their own. But, that might be going overboard if it should be used sparingly. Even Shiro didn't use it on the majority of his scar.

The reasoning gets a laugh out of Ryan though.
]

I...don't think I have a dead uncle? And floating feelings might be pretty nice!

[There's a slant to his voice that says he's joking, but considering how they met this is probably not a great thing to joke about.]

I'll be careful with it. Really.
shiro2hero: (how to look leader like step 1)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-19 05:41 am (UTC)(link)
[He sighs. Slowly. Like if he breathes out evenly enough, he'll get the irritation and concern completely exhaled out. It's never worked in the past, but no reason not to try it now.]

Ryan... this... you can't stay here without putting it back together. At least a little. I'll ask around, see if I can find more hands to come help.

[Regardless of the tasteful red curtains, you have to fix this place up. He even sort of nudges both of them out from under the slowly sagging ceiling. Just - don't stand there, buddy. Scoot over.]

[If he weren't so paper pale, the faint flush of color on his cheeks wouldn't show so much - the little gasp did him in. He just hadn't ever tried it elsewhere, because what if it ran out? What if there weren't enough for someone who really needed it?]


Yeah - no. Don't. You'll wind up on my couch telling me how soft the blanket is. [Just ask Peter Parker - ] A spoonful should be enough. Put it in tea, it'll help with pain.
chickenchoicejudy: Bang Your Drum - Dead Man Fall (And your day will come)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-19 06:01 am (UTC)(link)
[The offer of help blindsides him, and makes him feel like he's mis-stepped. The joking, carefree nature is gone, though he does still try and blow it off, as though there's any chance at all of waving away Shiro's concerns.]

You totally don't have to do that. You're already helping a ton with the honey and just coming here-

[He's easily nudged away from the bad spot in the ceiling though. Yeah, they...probably shouldn't stand directly under that.]

In tea. ...I can do that. [Honestly the clarification is good - Ryan was definitely wondering whether he was supposed to eat it or if he would just have a sticky arm until it healed.]

Pfft. If the blanket's that soft I might wind up doing that anyway someday, honey or no honey.
shiro2hero: (why is it on the CEILING)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-19 06:18 am (UTC)(link)
No, I think I do... [His eyes are absolutely on the ceiling. Someone has to. You can't just leave someone living in a building that looks ready to fall down around their ears.] Plenty of people need a project while they get settled in... I'll just ask around.

[The only other option is maybe letting the guy borrow one of the empty rooms in the house, he thinks. Either way, this really can't be healthy.]

Yeah, there's some in the bag, too. The... sleepy bear kind. [Which he is totally not giving away so it won't be given to him, shh.] All I could smuggle out of the house right now.

It's... really not.
chickenchoicejudy: Ramblings of a Lunatic - Bears in Trees (The ramblings of a lunatic)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-19 05:36 pm (UTC)(link)
[It's embarrassing that not only is Shiro going to help, but he's going to rope other people into helping. He's pretty sure his face is burning red from shame.]

Yeah, 'cause they're totally going to want to do home repairs for some weirdo they've never met before and not get judgey at all about the fact that it's been like a billion years since anyone's done anything to this place.

[He knows how it looks and he's not even that attached to the townhouse, but the thought of actually trying to deal with it is immensely overwhelming, and only gets moreso the longer he waits. It means actually having to confront why he didn't look for something else, and he doesn't want to think about it at all.

There are, perhaps, a lot of things about this living arrangement that aren't healthy.

He cuts himself off there though and quietly peeks into the bag and sees the aforementioned tea - a kind he recognizes from home even.
]
shiro2hero: (this is my chill the fuck out face)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-19 06:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Hey...

[Before he can even think better about it, he reaches out, resting his hand on Ryan's shoulder. Light enough that Ryan can move away, if he needs. Firm enough to be felt.]

It's okay. Some people just aren't good at home improvement. [Some people want to use a chainsaw to take down a wall, Chloe.] Listen, I'm sorry if that's how I came off. I didn't mean it that way.

[Since he's clearly part of the problem here. Right?]

I get concerned, easy. Guess I need to work on how it comes out, huh? But - I'm serious. If you need a hand with this place, I'll do what I can. [A shrug, and he drops his hand.] And honestly? People might be glad I've got a project that isn't signing on with the Hunters.
chickenchoicejudy: Scrawny - The Wallows (How do I look to you?)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-19 07:40 pm (UTC)(link)
[Ryan doesn't think fast enough to move away from Shiro's touch. It still isn't the most natural reaction for him - touch is soothing and reassuring, and he's still not used to it having immediate consequences for him.

It has nothing to do with home improvement skills, and it has nothing to do with Shiro's delivery. But when Shiro touches Ryan's shoulder, an overwhelming feeling of loneliness will wash over him like a tide. Memories that aren't his own surface.

Ryan tired and wandering the streets of Cellar Door after a long, long day. A brief image of him fruitlessly searching for Min-Gi on that first day. Ryan finally in front of the broken-down townhouse.

He stared at it for a while. Then, shrugging to himself, he goes in. It's not like there's anyone there to tell him not to.

A number of moments where he carefully avoided having people come over, directing them elsewhere or paid them a visit instead. Other moments where he stayed out as long as he could to put off having to go back and sleep alone again. Shiro will likely recognize one of those memories, though it's somewhat blurred on Ryan's end.

Then a thought cuts through it all, layering on top of everything he's feeling.

"I just didn't want to think about it."

There's a sudden sound of static, and it stops - Ryan has taken a step back, and he looks startled by it all.
]

Oh my god I-- sorry! I'm still not super good at controlling that yet. I didn't mean to, uh. I mean...

[He trails off. It's too late. Shiro already saw so much more than he needed to.]
shiro2hero: (cue the waterworks)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-19 09:17 pm (UTC)(link)
[His breath catches in his throat. He goes absolutely, completely still, muscles tensing - ready to bolt, or fight or whatever he has to do to survive this incoming memory, vision, whatever it is. Too long in Deerington. Too many years of expecting outside thoughts to be dangerous. Or, at least, horribly soul-crushing.]

[But this... isn't.]

[It doesn't make what he sees here any better. It still hurts to watch, to feel. He closes his eyes a few moments in, letting the familiar feeling of loneliness hit. Wandering long and late, keeping busy with a hundred different things so he - so they - so you don't have to go back to an empty house holding nothing but echos. The endless, useless searches. A memory of his own, of slowly coming back to himself, on the shore, cold water and blood and that all-consuming feeling of being alone. Because he'd lost so many. Because he'd failed to bring them here, failed to save them.]

[No, it's fine. I'm fine. I have to be.]

[Then it's done. There's static and trailing apologies, and it's done. All he can do is look at the young man under his hand, his expression startled, but unchanged beneath the surprise.]

[Instead of answering, Shiro steps forward. Embraces him.]


No. I'm sorry.
chickenchoicejudy: Ramblings of a Lunatic - Bears in Trees (Flirt with becoming food for worms)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-20 02:15 am (UTC)(link)
[A hug is the last reaction that Ryan's expecting and he tenses, but he doesn't pull away either. He just doesn't want to force any more thoughts and feelings into Shiro's head. He wants the hug, but he knows his powers are overwhelming - that he as a person is overwhelming.

He doesn't hug back right away, but he buries his face in Shiro's shoulder and takes a sharp, deep breath to try and steady himself so he doesn't cry or flood Shiro's head with his thoughts. He's slowly getting better at that, though he isn't the best. On Shiro's end he'll get several quick false starts as Ryan begins to think something and forces it out with static.

"But it's-̵̼̤̂-̵̮̊̀"

"It's my-̷̤̆-̴̹̘̫̤̋͐"

"I'm the one who-̶̗̈́̈̀-̴̲̘̐̈́̈͐"

"I'm the ẉ̷̆̄̒ơ̷̰͑͒͑r̵̢̩̆̓͘s̸͓̺̞̈́̔͑͝ţ̴͕̻̂́-̸̖̣̰̋̉̀-̴̳͍͓̐͊"


It isn't until he's totally sure that he has a good hold on it that he clings to Shiro in return. He doesn't pick up his head, but he hugs him tight.
]

Why are you sorry? I'm-- I mean. It's not like any of this was your fault.
shiro2hero: get it (lemme give you a hand)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-20 05:27 am (UTC)(link)
Easy... take it easy.

[Not to silence him. Not to make him stop - if he needs this, then hell, Shiro won't stop him. He'll just hold on. Brace himself against the words and static jumping through his brain. It's okay. Just breathe, focus. Breathe through the foreign voice. Through the clamor of static.]

[Until he feels the return embrace.]


I know. [At least he can say that honestly. Because Ryan's too new here for Shiro to have failed him. He hasn't broken any promises to him yet.] I know...

But I get it. And I'm sorry you've been there, too.
chickenchoicejudy: Ramblings of a Lunatic - Bears in Trees (Would anyone listen to this?)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-20 04:02 pm (UTC)(link)
[It's not just hard but strenuous to keep his thoughts even enough to not share them - they're normally bouncing all over the place, ricocheting around in his head. It feels like if he so much as moves the wrong way the dam will spring a leak, and it's exhausting.

But, it's worth it to get that hug without burdening Shiro too much. It feels good to be held.

At first Shiro's words catch him by surprise. Sometimes it feels like when something's wrong he's the only person who's ever been through what he's been through, but...that's not true.
]

Right. You're missing people too...and Adam.

[He probably could have talked to Shiro much sooner about all of this, before it exploded out of him with one touch, but...it's hard, to be that open. It's a lot easier to just act like he's fine all the time. He wants to apologize for only thinking about himself like he always does, but he holds it back and goes quiet for a moment. It takes so much longer to form what he wants to say when he's trying to keep everything in his own head. No more thoughts go to Shiro, but he'll catch snippets of emotions - gratitude, self-loathing, curiosity. When he speaks, it's a little quiet for him, muttered into Shiro's shoulder.]

...What did you do?

[Obviously whatever Shiro did has been working better than Ryan's attempts at coping. Either that, or Shiro's even better at hiding it than he is.]
Edited 2021-11-20 16:03 (UTC)
shiro2hero: (gonna pet the shit out of that cat)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-20 11:01 pm (UTC)(link)
[Good thing he'll hold on as long as necessary. As long as needed. It's the least he can do, even with the flickers of feelings, the bursts of thoughts he's getting. At least he knows whose they are. Where they're coming from. It's disorienting, but as long as he can focus - remind himself these are Ryan's, not his, not someone forcing anything into his mind... he's got this.]

[Breathe. Focus.]


Yeah. People... People I promised I'd help get out of the dream. Kind of feels like a lie now.

[Allura. Chloe. Keith. The dozens more faces he'd swore to help. To get them somewhere better, safer. So much for that. He hesitates, before answering the question. Not because he doesn't know, but because it's very much not the most helpful of responses. It's honest, though. Maybe that's all he can offer.]

Helped people. Watched out for them. Joined the Wakers, worked at the Orphanage...

[He'd been working himself to exhaustion, as much as possible. It wasn't a great solution. It wasn't a healthy solution. But it was all he could come up with. Shiro trails off there, in the end, before adding, quietly:]

And I watched for them. I still do. Every day I can.
chickenchoicejudy: Ramblings of a Lunatic - Bears in Trees (My mind does play an awful trick)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-21 02:35 am (UTC)(link)
[There's a pang of empathy from Ryan. Shiro really can relate, more than he even knows. This time though, he makes the choice to say it himself, before it can be forced out of him.]

...I promised I wouldn't rush ahead of Min-Gi again. I know it's not my fault, but it still feels like. I dunno. Like I betrayed him, or something. ...Sounds kind of dumb out loud.

[It sounded dumb when he told Mako too, but just because it sounds dumb doesn't mean that the feeling isn't there, lurking. He doesn't elaborate or explain that promise. Not now.

Ryan takes a shaky breath and pulls back. He doesn't put a ton of distance between them, but enough that they're not touching anymore, so Shiro won't have to deal with his overwhelming emotions. He wipes at his eyes and sniffles and basically does everything he can to not cry, though it's pretty obvious he was close.
]

I-I do too. The Waker thing. Mostly to look for Min, but...yeah.

[It seemed like the perfect way to do that, and if he helped someone else along the way then that's just an added bonus, right? Maybe it's selfish of him, but. At least someone else is doing it for similar reason.]

So...at least it's not all. This.

[He gestures vaguely and tiredly at the entire room around them. He doesn't only make bad coping decisions, just mostly bad ones.]
shiro2hero: (maybe he's born with it)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-21 04:37 am (UTC)(link)
No, it doesn't.

[It doesn't sound dumb, as far as he's concerned. It doesn't even sound close. Maybe he's too close to this one - maybe he's been There too many times. But it doesn't sound dumb.]

[He lets Ryan pull back. Expression as sympathetic as ever. If he had a tissue, he'd offer it.]


Yeah. I was looking for the others, too. For Adam... [Who had turned up, finally, but it seems like rubbing salt in a wound to actually point that out right now.] Doesn't mean you're not doing some good, while you're there, though. You'll still find people. That's important.

[Just in case it needed to be said.]

[He chews his lip, at that gesture. At the room around them. Thinking. Slowly coming to a decision before speaking again. Maybe it won't be accepted, maybe it won't help - but at least the poor kid won't be alone.]


We have a spare room, at the house.
Edited 2021-11-21 04:37 (UTC)
chickenchoicejudy: Ramblings of a Lunatic - Bears in Trees (But don't we know it will never work)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-21 05:11 am (UTC)(link)
[It is important. Ryan's never done any real volunteering before arriving here, but being able to be a happy, welcoming face for people who are just reforming and confused and still getting used to their land legs admittedly does feel pretty good. He can throw a cloak on them, give them their belongings, and make them feel welcome and safe.

He only has it in him to nod in response, but he appreciates it. It's...actually not often that anyone tells him he's doing something good for anyone else.

There's still a lump in his throat and his eyes are a little red, but he's managed to stop the tears for now. It takes another breath before he feels like he can reply like a person though.
]

Yeah? Are you...offering?

[It feels kind of stupid to ask, but somehow more natural than just immediately assuming and jumping on it. Though, he does have one hesitation--]

What if your people turn up?
shiro2hero: (gonna pet the shit out of that cat)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-21 05:30 am (UTC)(link)
Yeah. I... know it helps to have someone else around. Lance moved out, and I think Hunk might follow him.

[In other words, the house is going to be a lot quieter than it already is. Sure, he's not entirely alone, there. But it's going to be a big change. Having someone else there - that would probably help both of them.]

Doesn't have to be permanent. We could try fixing this place up while you're with us.

[He smiles, faintly. It's a bit teasing, but also, it feels right to give the guy an out, if that's what he wants. If that's what he needs. A temporary reprieve to get his feet back under him again.]

We always had a spare room. Even when everyone was here.
chickenchoicejudy: Good Old-Fashioned Lover Boy - Queen (Come on and get it)

[personal profile] chickenchoicejudy 2021-11-21 06:29 am (UTC)(link)
[To be honest, Ryan doesn't know what he wants or needs at the moment. Thinking that hard about it is a daunting task, one that he's not really up to. In that respect, the thing he needs most is exactly that - a place where he doesn't have to think about any of this for a while.

He smiles in return - it's a tired and small smile, but it's more genuine than any of the fake ones he was flashing earlier.
]

That, uh. ...That sounds nice, actually?

[He's turned down a couple of similar offers before, or at least steered conversations to the point where people didn't try to offer. It was a mix of embarrassment and pride and even just not wanting to be a burden on anyone else. If he felt like he might be in the way, he would just laugh off his troubles and try to reassure them.

But Shiro's alone too. Even though Shiro clearly tries really hard to take care of people, it doesn't feel as much like he's just causing trouble and stress for him. It's something that he might need as much as Ryan does.
]

Yeah. Yeah, that sounds good.
shiro2hero: (oops accidentally charming)

[personal profile] shiro2hero 2021-11-21 06:53 am (UTC)(link)
It's not a big room. I... got a lot of flak for living there.

[He got so much shit for living there. It was barely big enough for the twin bed he'd been using for almost the entire time he was in Deerington. But maybe for one person, one smaller than Shiro's complete "meat dorito" shape.]

[That expression is a familiar one. The weariness, the sadness. It's not an expression he'd ever want to see on someone else's face.]


Take your time, all right? I uh. I might have to tell someone you're coming so he's not totally surprised. [And just in case Ryan needs time to pack or anything.] But if you need a hand hauling your stuff, let me know.

[This will probably be good for both of them.]

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