Deer Country Mod (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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deercountry2021-12-08 02:19 am
reddosmod) wrote in deercountry2021-12-08 02:19 am
Entry tags:
- *event,
- ahiru: timmy,
- anakin skywalker: michele,
- ange ushiromiya: jelle,
- anna amarande: celene,
- ariadne: wizera,
- cassandra: drizz,
- chara: kai,
- darth maul: shade,
- darth nox: saint,
- fat billie: lucy,
- glitch: ceej,
- izuku "deku" midoriya: tea,
- lance: charley,
- luna lovegood: cheryl,
- luz noceda: pedro,
- makoto kino: mesi,
- manabu yuuki: elle,
- mebh og mactire: oggy,
- minako aino: fay,
- nehan: ray,
- obi-wan kenobi: timmy,
- orpheus: qv,
- palamedes sextus: laura,
- paul atreides: beth,
- peter graham: jhey,
- reaper: vette,
- rose da silva: jhey,
- savage opress: vette,
- scorpia: gore,
- snow white: jax,
- soldier blue: elle,
- stiles stilinski: charley,
- varian: tf,
- willow rosenberg: lucy,
- wu: mads,
- yuri lowell: mads
I'd go back in time and change it, but I can't
DECEMBER 2021 EVENT
WINTER MOURNING
RUN, RABBIT, RUN
LOCKJOINT
CODING
Hello! We are trying a new style of event this December with archival-like entries that characters can ICly find in the Archives. This should allow characters to be able to plan against certain events that occur in-game and do research ahead of time, during the event, or after the fact.
The idea is that these prompts will provide you with all the possibilities characters could theoretically face from the prompt. We hope this leaves more open-ended opportunities for people to engage with. Anything mentioned in the excerpts could be an experience characters encounter. You can always ask for clarification on any prompt on the plotting page.
This is a way to keep all event prompts relevant since new characters would be able to "read up" on these events/excerpts by visiting the Archives or other such resources for information about past events and what they can anticipate from the setting.
We hope this new style makes sense and is fun for players to work with! They will rely on players creating more of the atmosphere than the prompts, but we think that the prompts will provide the perfect guidance as to what the atmosphere should feel like. Enjoy!
IMAGE DESCRIPTORS IN ORDER OF APPEARANCE
Prompt One
[Image One: Holiday themed antler decoration.]
[Image Two: White stag with perfect, circular antlers with bits of ice attached.]
Prompt Two
[Image One: Sculpture of white rabbit with neck caught in a snare. Non-graphic.]
[Image Two: Person in red cloak and wolf mask turning around.]
Prompt Three
[Image One: Puppet making bloody snow angel in snow.]
[Image Two: Bloodied hands wrapped in bandages clenching.]
The idea is that these prompts will provide you with all the possibilities characters could theoretically face from the prompt. We hope this leaves more open-ended opportunities for people to engage with. Anything mentioned in the excerpts could be an experience characters encounter. You can always ask for clarification on any prompt on the plotting page.
This is a way to keep all event prompts relevant since new characters would be able to "read up" on these events/excerpts by visiting the Archives or other such resources for information about past events and what they can anticipate from the setting.
We hope this new style makes sense and is fun for players to work with! They will rely on players creating more of the atmosphere than the prompts, but we think that the prompts will provide the perfect guidance as to what the atmosphere should feel like. Enjoy!
Prompt One
[Image One: Holiday themed antler decoration.]
[Image Two: White stag with perfect, circular antlers with bits of ice attached.]
Prompt Two
[Image One: Sculpture of white rabbit with neck caught in a snare. Non-graphic.]
[Image Two: Person in red cloak and wolf mask turning around.]
Prompt Three
[Image One: Puppet making bloody snow angel in snow.]
[Image Two: Bloodied hands wrapped in bandages clenching.]
WHEN: Begins in December and can last until the end of Feb.
WHERE: Everywhere
CONTENT WARNINGS: Spoilers for various canons, survival situations, forced memory share
WHERE: Everywhere
CONTENT WARNINGS: Spoilers for various canons, survival situations, forced memory share
[A passage from Rituals of Trench: Remembering Our Pasts reads the following:]
"A long-standing tradition to celebrate Bone Season is for Deerians to collect antlers and bones salvaged from natural resources and create decorative home accents. These antler-bone decors are known formally as Winter Mournings and can be found in almost every residential home throughout Deer Country. Winter Mournings can be made to look like wreaths, candle holders, or simply an antler with a bow hung up on a wall.
Winter Mournings is seen as a way to honor one's past tribulations and how one has managed to survive and overcome hardships during their life. Winter Mournings serves as a testament to survival and a willingness to keep surviving even when things look bleak and dismal.
Creating Winter Mournings is considered a blessing to the Pthumerians Dorothea, Remina, and Argonaut. You will know if the blessing was accepted once your Winter Mourning begins to glow like the moon. Touch your Winter Mourning and you will be pulled back in time to a memory of a specific time when you or someone else had to survive something physically or mentally challenging. For some, it is merely a memory that cannot hurt, but for others, you may want to proceed with caution as it has been known to pull people physically back to times of war.
One cannot choose which memory they wind up in if it is their own, a friend's, or a complete stranger's. Winter Mournings was designed to create a sense of union and empathy among residents and is meant to open your mind and heart to those who have suffered around you. It is time you explore your past, or someone else's past, with an open mind and see how the other side has lived through hard times. These memories are known to be from adolescence, adulthood, or sometimes even futures that have not yet happened or timelines you have never known. After all, Remina sees all past and all history. That means they see all of your past and history too.
No memory lasts forever though. Once the memory has been concluded, you shall be brought back to the present by the Winter Mourning Stag: a great white beast with a circle of frozen antlers. It will come to you when the time is ready, and you will return to the present like waking from a dazzling dream.
Experiencing Winter Mournings can stabilize one's mood and provide restful sleep after, even if the memories may be difficult to swallow. It truly is a tribute to honor past horrors and traumas. Some memories are painful to remember, but forgetting them will never do anyone any good either. So hang your Winter Mournings and remember what matters.
Survive another day. You are worth it."
FAQ
"A long-standing tradition to celebrate Bone Season is for Deerians to collect antlers and bones salvaged from natural resources and create decorative home accents. These antler-bone decors are known formally as Winter Mournings and can be found in almost every residential home throughout Deer Country. Winter Mournings can be made to look like wreaths, candle holders, or simply an antler with a bow hung up on a wall.
Winter Mournings is seen as a way to honor one's past tribulations and how one has managed to survive and overcome hardships during their life. Winter Mournings serves as a testament to survival and a willingness to keep surviving even when things look bleak and dismal.
Creating Winter Mournings is considered a blessing to the Pthumerians Dorothea, Remina, and Argonaut. You will know if the blessing was accepted once your Winter Mourning begins to glow like the moon. Touch your Winter Mourning and you will be pulled back in time to a memory of a specific time when you or someone else had to survive something physically or mentally challenging. For some, it is merely a memory that cannot hurt, but for others, you may want to proceed with caution as it has been known to pull people physically back to times of war.
One cannot choose which memory they wind up in if it is their own, a friend's, or a complete stranger's. Winter Mournings was designed to create a sense of union and empathy among residents and is meant to open your mind and heart to those who have suffered around you. It is time you explore your past, or someone else's past, with an open mind and see how the other side has lived through hard times. These memories are known to be from adolescence, adulthood, or sometimes even futures that have not yet happened or timelines you have never known. After all, Remina sees all past and all history. That means they see all of your past and history too.
No memory lasts forever though. Once the memory has been concluded, you shall be brought back to the present by the Winter Mourning Stag: a great white beast with a circle of frozen antlers. It will come to you when the time is ready, and you will return to the present like waking from a dazzling dream.
Experiencing Winter Mournings can stabilize one's mood and provide restful sleep after, even if the memories may be difficult to swallow. It truly is a tribute to honor past horrors and traumas. Some memories are painful to remember, but forgetting them will never do anyone any good either. So hang your Winter Mournings and remember what matters.
Survive another day. You are worth it."
FAQ
1. Winter Mournings can produce new memories every time you touch them or the same memory.
2. Characters cannot choose what the memory is.
3. Characters can arrive in each other's memories regardless of if they already know each other. Multiple people can experience the same memory.
4. You can either experience the memory as a memory you can't touch or experience - or you can physically be in the memory and have to survive the situation as well. If you die in memory, your body will die wherever you had been touching the Winter Mourning.
5. Palebloods are capable of altering memories or how they or others experience memories.
6. Characters can be pulled into memories at random - as long as one of the characters in the memory share is touching a Winter Mourning at first.
WHEN: Month of December
WHERE: Everywhere/the woods
CONTENT WARNINGS: Themes of hunting, ghosts, curses, attempts at animal violence, hunting people based on blood types.
WHERE: Everywhere/the woods
CONTENT WARNINGS: Themes of hunting, ghosts, curses, attempts at animal violence, hunting people based on blood types.
[An excerpt from Legends of Trench: Curses and Causations reads the following:]
"One of the most notorious legends of Trench is without a doubt the tale of The Huntress and the Hare. Most Trenchies have been told this tale since they were children, but for those unfamiliar, settle in.
This story begins with a mischievous god and an ambitious huntress. The Pthumerian Dorothea loved to play tricks on hunters trying to survive the Bone Season, setting animals free from traps and remaking the traps to catch the hunters instead. One day, a darkblood Huntress was fed up with Dorothea preventing her from catching food for her family and decided to settle the score. The Huntress began to hunt for Dorothea specifically, but it is no small feat hunting the god of trickery and survival.
The Huntress started to rely on her darkblood powers to alter reality to make the perfect traps. Innocuous trees turned into glue traps that anyone would stick to until they were freed by a darkblood or death took their pain from them. Walking through bushes would snag legs and necks, effectively trapping whatever creatures were unfortunate enough to wander for food. Magical snares and beartraps lock around victims with unrelenting force, leaving people and animals to try for help until they cry no more. While this took many innocent lives in the woods, animals, and people alike, it never seemed to work on Dorothea.
Dorothea continued to outwit the Huntress until she eventually drove the Huntress insane. The Huntress died without ever catching Dorothea, but they say her vengeful spirit awakens in winter and begins to set her traps yet again. The Huntress sends her traps and her dead animals after vilebloods and warmbloods to spite Dorothea and hope to maybe catch the god's attention. But Dorothea is no passive god. Dorothea spurs vilebloods and warmbloods to defend themselves against darkbloods and coldbloods.
Infamously, this has created enormous tension between the blood types during December some years, and it is said that the blood lust has caused the types to begin hunting one another regardless of old friendships and alliances. Beware the Huntress's curse. Some believe darkbloods and coldbloods can still hear her haunting commands and cries from the Trenchwood.
They say there is no ease for the tension between the bloodtypes until December has passed, but some believe palebloods may provide relief if they are willing."
FAQ
"One of the most notorious legends of Trench is without a doubt the tale of The Huntress and the Hare. Most Trenchies have been told this tale since they were children, but for those unfamiliar, settle in.
This story begins with a mischievous god and an ambitious huntress. The Pthumerian Dorothea loved to play tricks on hunters trying to survive the Bone Season, setting animals free from traps and remaking the traps to catch the hunters instead. One day, a darkblood Huntress was fed up with Dorothea preventing her from catching food for her family and decided to settle the score. The Huntress began to hunt for Dorothea specifically, but it is no small feat hunting the god of trickery and survival.
The Huntress started to rely on her darkblood powers to alter reality to make the perfect traps. Innocuous trees turned into glue traps that anyone would stick to until they were freed by a darkblood or death took their pain from them. Walking through bushes would snag legs and necks, effectively trapping whatever creatures were unfortunate enough to wander for food. Magical snares and beartraps lock around victims with unrelenting force, leaving people and animals to try for help until they cry no more. While this took many innocent lives in the woods, animals, and people alike, it never seemed to work on Dorothea.
Dorothea continued to outwit the Huntress until she eventually drove the Huntress insane. The Huntress died without ever catching Dorothea, but they say her vengeful spirit awakens in winter and begins to set her traps yet again. The Huntress sends her traps and her dead animals after vilebloods and warmbloods to spite Dorothea and hope to maybe catch the god's attention. But Dorothea is no passive god. Dorothea spurs vilebloods and warmbloods to defend themselves against darkbloods and coldbloods.
Infamously, this has created enormous tension between the blood types during December some years, and it is said that the blood lust has caused the types to begin hunting one another regardless of old friendships and alliances. Beware the Huntress's curse. Some believe darkbloods and coldbloods can still hear her haunting commands and cries from the Trenchwood.
They say there is no ease for the tension between the bloodtypes until December has passed, but some believe palebloods may provide relief if they are willing."
FAQ
1. Characters will increasingly feel the urge to actively hunt one another using traps/etc.
2. The Huntress's curse includes undead animals/beasts chasing after warmbloods and vilebloods and magical traps. Players can invent unique traps for their characters.
3. There will be an innate urge to chase/hide from one another.
4. The curse can be broken by paleblood intervention, character death, or a gradual wearing off by the end of the month.
WHEN: All of Bone Season
WHERE: On Sleeper bodies
CONTENT WARNINGS: Mild body horror, blood magic curses, physical curses, cures through blood ministration/blood letting, possible skin removal, injuries, possible death via starvation/exposure.
WHERE: On Sleeper bodies
CONTENT WARNINGS: Mild body horror, blood magic curses, physical curses, cures through blood ministration/blood letting, possible skin removal, injuries, possible death via starvation/exposure.
[An passage from The Sleeper Condition; Chapter 13: Bodily Aches and More. Found exclusively at the Lumenarium:]
"Generally speaking, Sleeper blood allows Sleepers to navigate this world without the fear of illness and disease. However, no organic body is perfect, and Sleeper blood has its own set of ailments to fret over. Blood Ministers have studied the phenomena of Lockjoint for years now and believe that it is linked to the crystalization found in Sleeper death, though the exact connection remains unknown.
Lockjoint tends to begin and last throughout Bone Season. Some Sleepers may never experience it, but for many, it becomes a reoccurring issue to dread each season. This condition forces blood magic to gather at the joints and effectively lock up. Sleepers find it difficult to move their bodies at the bends, fingers, knees, shoulders, etc without some form of discomfort. Minimal lockjoint can be painful and annoyance, but critical lockjoint can be fatal.
The most severe cases of lockjoint documented have shown Sleepers to have crystalization form over their joints, rendering parts of their bodies completely immobile. Some Sleepers have been found dead in this condition, all their joints crystallized, and it is believed most died from natural causes thereafter.
One can determine they are experiencing lockjoint when the coloration around the joints begins to darken in color, typically looking like a bruise. Calcification may occur rapidly the more magic a Sleeper uses or the more they expose themselves to outside elements. It is imperative that Sleepers remain properly clothed during Bone Season, even if they are coldbloods, and to invest in enchanted clothes that can lock in heat.
A known cure for lockjoint is the art of bloodletting. Puncturing the joints with small incisions seems to allow a release of the built-up magic and can provide immediate relief to the Sleeper. Catching lockjoint early is imperative. Alternative methods are soaking in hot springs and salted water.
Those who are in a more severe state will have to carefully have the crystals removed. This will likely remove the skin as well. Local anesthesia is highly recommended for the procedure. This process is known to leave scarring. The crystals can be saved and used as bloodstones from whoever they were harvested from. If you find a Sleeper dead from lockjoint, make sure to harvest the crystals as they are incredibly valuable.
This curse is believed to stem from Sleeper blood magic congealing within the body in contrast with the atmospheric magic of Bone Season. There is no known prevention for lockjoint. Lockjoint can impact all Sleepers regardless of bloodtype or the material their bodies are made from."
FAQ
"Generally speaking, Sleeper blood allows Sleepers to navigate this world without the fear of illness and disease. However, no organic body is perfect, and Sleeper blood has its own set of ailments to fret over. Blood Ministers have studied the phenomena of Lockjoint for years now and believe that it is linked to the crystalization found in Sleeper death, though the exact connection remains unknown.
Lockjoint tends to begin and last throughout Bone Season. Some Sleepers may never experience it, but for many, it becomes a reoccurring issue to dread each season. This condition forces blood magic to gather at the joints and effectively lock up. Sleepers find it difficult to move their bodies at the bends, fingers, knees, shoulders, etc without some form of discomfort. Minimal lockjoint can be painful and annoyance, but critical lockjoint can be fatal.
The most severe cases of lockjoint documented have shown Sleepers to have crystalization form over their joints, rendering parts of their bodies completely immobile. Some Sleepers have been found dead in this condition, all their joints crystallized, and it is believed most died from natural causes thereafter.
One can determine they are experiencing lockjoint when the coloration around the joints begins to darken in color, typically looking like a bruise. Calcification may occur rapidly the more magic a Sleeper uses or the more they expose themselves to outside elements. It is imperative that Sleepers remain properly clothed during Bone Season, even if they are coldbloods, and to invest in enchanted clothes that can lock in heat.
A known cure for lockjoint is the art of bloodletting. Puncturing the joints with small incisions seems to allow a release of the built-up magic and can provide immediate relief to the Sleeper. Catching lockjoint early is imperative. Alternative methods are soaking in hot springs and salted water.
Those who are in a more severe state will have to carefully have the crystals removed. This will likely remove the skin as well. Local anesthesia is highly recommended for the procedure. This process is known to leave scarring. The crystals can be saved and used as bloodstones from whoever they were harvested from. If you find a Sleeper dead from lockjoint, make sure to harvest the crystals as they are incredibly valuable.
This curse is believed to stem from Sleeper blood magic congealing within the body in contrast with the atmospheric magic of Bone Season. There is no known prevention for lockjoint. Lockjoint can impact all Sleepers regardless of bloodtype or the material their bodies are made from."
FAQ
1. This impacts characters regardless of blood type or their body - meaning it can impact characters with metal/plastic/plant/wood/etc bodies.
2. Players can choose how rapid or severe this gets and how quickly they can be healed.
no subject
[He quips, trying to pull some distracting levity into the moment, though his voice is strained. It's not helpful that he's struggling with his powers here in this place where his failure to use his powers had killed him and Keith. Needless to say, he's very determined to get them both out of here.]
See a way out? Like, I dunno, that deer… or a weird door that shouldn't be there?
no subject
[Look, he's used to this sort of distracting humour- Eugene is a pro at it, so he lets Lance have this. He glances around, frowning.]
No deer. Sometimes there's that weird plant Cynthia likes so much too?
no subject
Then he spots that plant under the water down the hall… back where he and Keith are currently about to drown… great.]
Oh… [He lets out a huff, voice strained from the effort of holding this dome.] Dammit! If that's a hint that I should talk about it, then all I'm gonna say is he's a friend from home, and I thought I liked him, but I kept getting him hurt, then he left the dream and never came back. He's gone forever and it was all a mistake. [He looks up at the ceiling/heavens.] Happy now??
no subject
I'm sorry. It must have hurt a lot to put all of that out there only for him to vanish. Did you ever get any closure on it? This? I mean.
[He gestures at the mess going on.]
Before he left?
no subject
What's there to get closure on? I was messed up in the head and thought my feelings were something they weren't. The dream did stuff like that all the time.
[He's trying to retreat back into the closet, basically. Not just about how he feels about Keith specifically, but his sexuality in general. But it's also a box that can't be closed completely, either, he can't un-know what he knows, but damn he's going to try.
He looks up and the flower has moved down a different hall. It seems admitting even that much was enough to at least change their path. Good thing too, since he's straining to hold this the longer it goes on.]
Guess we go this way.
no subject
[It's asked gently, not pushing. Like a soft, concerned query. He knows better than to go at this like a bull through a gate. ]
It's just...well, it wouldn't be a big lasting memory or hurt you this much if...well, if those feelings weren't there at all.
[He sticks with Lance as they move (not really having a choice, it's that or...drown) he nods- glad for the path changing. ]
Let's get out of here.
move to Varian mem now?
[It's not said harshly, but it is defiant, though he understands that Varian is just trying to be helpful. This is just a pandora's box he's desperately bee trying to close for almost a year and he's not ready to accept that it's open now. Or face… any of it. After Keith left, and then Chloe right after, he'd shut down and given up, started dying more frequently as a result, and he still hasn't fully processed the grief.]
And… [His voice cracks and destabilizes and he doesn't sound quite as defiant, but still determined to stick to his narrative.] It hurts because it was an embarrassing way to die.
[As they turn a corner, the setting around them shifts, goes black, the water fades and they are abruptly somewhere else. Somewhere he doesn't recognize.]
yeeeee
...Okay, Lance. If you say so.
[He's expecting to be back in the city, but he's not. It takes him a hot second to realise what they're seeing, where they are and once that penny drops, he stops dead. Of course, it would be this. Why wouldn't it be this. It's always this.
A group of people Lance wouldn't know are trying to fight huge automatons- the building nearby breaks apart as three people race out of it, pursued by an even bigger machine. Sitting in the cockpit, framed in red is Varian. A Varian nearly four years younger than the one standing beside Lance know, looking considerably paler, but Varian all the same. ]
I hate this one. I guess that's why the dream showed it so much...and now it's here too. Great.
[The older Varian hugs his arms around himself, staring at the floor, not looking. He doesn't need to- the memory is pretty solidly engrained in his memory without the town pulling it on him all the time.
Cassandra leaps at the robot with a war cry- the younger Varian scoops him up with his robot hand like she was nothing more than a fly.
"Hello Cassandra, I always knew I could sweep you off your feet."
The older Varian actively cringes. Partly because who even says that, you little weirdo? and also...well, he knows what's coming down the line. ]
no subject
Lance looks around, taking in the weird black spikes, the medieval looking setting and then the strangely not so out of place Automatons. His empathic ability picks up on Varian's surface emotions beside him, and it's enough to gather he's… ashamed. It's an emotion that Lance is intimately familiar with.
He looks over to him hugging himself, a sympathetic look on his face, even without seeing the whole of the memory yet.] Pthumerian magic likes to do that, huh.
[It's the best he can think of to try to put him at ease, and then the memory Varian picks up the girl with the sword. Lance is turned away from older Varian for the moment and he's glad for that because he would rather he not see him wince at that. It can't be denied this is… not exactly stellar behavior… or even a good villain one-liner.]
no subject
[Why can't he be left to tell people on his own? Why does it have to be dragged into a conversation like this? When he's ready.
The villain one-liner is awful, like a child who's only experience of actual villany were from the campy books he devoured on the regular. Which...is exactly what it was. He feels awkward about it, but the overiding emotion is guilt. It comes to him in waves as he tries to make himself as small as possible, not watching what's happening.
A woman nearby, the queen, steps in, demanding that Varian let Cassandra go. In retaliation, Varian grabs her with the other robot hand. Rapunzel hucks her frying pan at the robot, it bounces harmlessly off the cockpit, but the princess is angry. Angrier than he's ever seen her as she steps into the fray.
"That's ENOUGH, Varian."
The younger Varian doesn't want to listen. When he speaks again it's not a pithy one-liner- his tone is angry and hurt- like a cornered animal lashing out at anyone foolish enough to come near.
"It's not enough until you endure the same amount of pain and agony I have!"
And then the automaton's hands close around the two women inside them, slowly crushing them- they cry out in pain as Rapunzel watches in horror. The older Varian still doesn't look, boring a hole in the ground with his gaze instead. ]
She couldn't save my dad, so I stupidly decided to take away what she loved as- as recompense, I guess. I was wrong.
no subject
He would like to say he finds it extremely easy and simple to see this and brush it off as the past. But he's an imperfect person, and he needs a minute to process it. To say that his trust in people has diminished since he was brought to Deerington is a gross understatement. Maybe if he were the person he was before that and before the war with the Galra, he could just instantly turn to Varian and reassure him. That seems like something Shiro would be able to do.
But Shiro is a hero and- Lance stops his train of thought completely, heaving a breath and just making himself focus in on how Varian feels about this memory. And what he's saying. Then he turns to look at him with conflict and sympathy, trying to assess him and just put all the information he has in order and weigh it together objectively and… handle this like a good friend.
There's been a wall around his heart since the end of October. On some level, he's not found himself comfortable letting himself be open with Varian, and he hadn't really noticed until this moment when he has to really think about Varian as a person and incorporate this memory into his understanding of him. It's not comfortable, he doesn't like this feeling, it's choking him… so he buries it and focuses on the facts right in front of him. They make enough things clear that he can side-step the complications and conflict and cut right to the heart of the matter.]
Yeah, you were. [His voice is hushed and empathetic. Despite everything, he is an empath and he's felt that level of guilt before. He feels it every day.] But the important thing is you know that now… and that's not who you are anymore.
[He lets out a shuddered breath and looks down at the ground, lightly hugging himself as he continues.] What I see… is a scared kid who went off the deep end and took it out on the wrong people. It doesn't make it okay, but… I can sense how guilty you still feel all this time later. And that means you're a good person, Varian.
no subject
The fact Lance doesn't immediately lean on comfort means a lot. He doesn't think he could handle that. He knows who he used to be. He knows what he did. None of those things deserves comfort. Just cold, hard truths. Lance takes a fair middle ground and he can live with that.
He watches as Rapunzel touches the rocks, as she comes further into her power and destroys his fleet singlehandedly. How she saves Cassandra and her mother and leaves his machines broken and powerless. And after all that, she still asks the guards not to be too hard on him, when he's led away in chains.]
I was an idiot. It's- it's not who I am anymore, and I fixed things back home...eventually. After a few more mistakes. I-
[He watches the prison wagon take him away and one of the moon flowers blooms the space it left behind. He stares at it, his chest aching.]
I never want to be that person ever again.
no subject
He turns an understanding and conflicted look to Varian when he continues on. The conflict comes from an instinct to comfort, but the rest of him still insisting it's not quite the right thing right now, still. And then there's his own residual feelings about it he still needs to process.]
…I don't think you will be. [He looks down, thinking hard about his next words, arms still crossed securely]
Y'know… where I'm from, kids that're as old as you are in this memory are treated differently by the law. Because you're not fully formed yet. Literally, it's brain biology… and I know it doesn't help much or make it better, but being an idiot is a natural part of being a kid. You made bigger mistakes than most kids, but you've grown up and learned from them. That's more than a lot of people more than half your age who've done worse can say. And… I'm proud of you for it.
no subject
He listens to what Lance has to say- at first wanting to argue against it. He knew what he was doing back then, he knew it was wrong. Not fully formed or not, he still acted so, so badly. He doesn't want to have any blame pulled away from him. ]
I knew what I was doing at the time. Maybe I...acted like a stupid idiot, but it's not like I didn't know what I was doing was wrong.
[But then he stills as Lance tells him that he's proud of him. Proud of how far he's come. That's always going to be a massive weak spot for him- having people be proud of him. He sought it so desperately from his father growing up that even now, as much as he's grown up, that external validation still means so much to him. He swallows a lump in his throat. ]
Um- th-thank you. For that.
no subject
It's… not that kids don't know right from wrong… look, my nephew always pulled his sister's hair and hit her when she annoyed him. He knew it was wrong because when I asked him about it, he told me so, point blank, no shame. But he did it anyway because it felt good. The part of your brain that controls reason and thinking before you act doesn't fully form until you're like in your twenties or something. Teenagers do stupid stuff even if they know it's wrong because their emotions are more in control than logic.
[He heaves a breath and runs a hand through his hair.] I'm not saying you get a pass, because yeah, other kids in similar situations have made better choices from what I know. But it's still part of the overall picture and where I come from, we still put kids who do stuff like that in prison for a while, but usually not for as long and in a nicer place where they can recover. Because consequences are important for anyone no matter how old they are… but so is learning to forgive yourself as you get older for all the dumb things you did when you were still growing up… even the really bad stuff. And especially if you've learned your lesson and made it right… which you have.
[He smiles slightly, encouragingly and sympathetically.] And no problem. I mean it.
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Oh. I- I guess that makes sense. I never really thought about it like that before.
[He's...so deeply appreciative that Lance doesn'tgood thing that he'll never heal completely from it. ]
Yeah- I mean, everyone back home has forgiven me now, pretty much. I'm the royal engineer and I managed to get the whole kingdom hot running water, and I try to make things better here too. I know I'm...definitely not that person anymore. Lesson super learned. But...I don't know. I don't think I'll ever completely forgive myself for it.
[He offers a tired little smile in return.]
It...means a lot. [He nods at the growing flower.] We should...uh, go. I don't want this thing to start replaying or something.
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Yeah, forgiving yourself is the hardest thing to do. [An awkward glance to the side.] Or that's what I hear, anyway.
[He nods again, agreeing that it's probably time to seek the exit, and when he turns to look, there's that magnificent deer in the distance. Their escort out of here, from past experience.] Looks like that's our ride.
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[He's likely never going to be there and he's accepted it. Lance's comment does get a curious look, but he doesn't press. They've both had enough painful memories exposed for one day. He nods, heading for the deer.]
Yeah. Let's get out of here.
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Yeah… I think we've both had enough of memory lane.
[He heads to the deer and the memory starts to fade behind them.]