return those voices echoing in the sea (closed)

[entreats]

Who: Ange and assorted CR.
What: A catchall for event threads.
When: During December
Where: Mostly in memoryscape, some other stuff all across Trench.

Content Warnings: Child abuse, bullying, suicidal ideation, violence, gore, blood, character death

( it's a catchall for closed event threads! if i didn't promise you a starter on this already, but you'd still like to play something out with ange during the event - especially when it comes to the winter mourning - please let me know by either pming this account or contacting me on plurk at queeningsquare! )

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[entreats]

[ Is it all that surprising to see Atsushi freaking out so much?

.. not really. It suits him, after all. He's much more the type to impulsively react and get emotional than she is.. and if he has no clue what's going on here, then of course he's going to react like that.

So Ange tries to pull her thoughts away from this place and all the feelings it brings her upon even just a glimpse at it, and instead gathers herself enough to speak up and bother to explain. ]

Ah, well.. This is a memory.

[ Might as well start with the basics. She doesn't know if this is the first one he's seen this month, after all.

(God, if this is the first one, and then it just happens to be one of hers.. It's like this place knows she'd rather not show him!) ]

Is this the first time this has happened to you this month? [ Ange glances around as she says that, though she's mostly trying to keep an eye out for 'herself'. So far she can't see the Ange that's supposed to be in this memory though, so she's kind of hoping that younger Ange won't show up at all. Maybe she can claim this is someone else's memory then. Just gently sidestep having to show her past to Atsushi. ]

[undermoonlight]

First time... Oh, great.

[So this month is going to be exhausting as well? At least this school doesn't smell like iron and isn't coated in red. Yet, Ange seems tense somehow. He understands why he's anxious--- he's a boy in an all girl's school, after all,-- but Ange? Plus, she immediately knew that this was a memory and not a random school.]

Is this your school? You did mention you boarded, right..?

[entreats]

.. yeah.

[ Ange knows that she isn't going to be able to escape answering that question honestly when he's asking her about it this directly. So she does give him the honest answer, even though something about Ange still is looking much more awkward than she usually does. ]

This is St. Lucia's. I was between these walls every single day for years. [ And years, and years.. Honestly, it felt like an eternity.

It's almost as if she never left in the first place, considering the sheer effect this place has on her now she's caught a glimpse of it again.

But as Ange is saying that second part, the thing she was desperately wishing wouldn't happen is actually happening.

A version of Ange that looks quite a few years younger than her current self shows up, starting to walk down the hallway. She's wearing the same school uniform as all the other girls too - thankfully making it easy to differentiate between the Ange standing there next to Atsushi and the one that's just part of this memory. ]

[undermoonlight]

[So this is a boarding school that she attended. And as if on cue, a phantom of Ange enters the scene. She's wearing the same uniform as the other girls, but Atsushi can tell she's not the same as them; Ange seems almost distant compared to the bright smiles and confidence of her classmates. He immediately feels sympathy for her, maybe some empathy too. After all, Atsushi was once the child who was othered by his peers.

He tries to keep his focus on the 'real' Ange, but it's hard to look away from the girl in the uniform. He can't help but worry about her.]

... Do you want to leave, Ange-chan? You don't seem like you want to be here.

[entreats]

I don't think there's anywhere we can go. [ She replies.

But her voice is already softer. It's just like Atsushi is noticing himself - every single little thing about Ange right now is practically screaming that she doesn't want to be here. But Ange knows.. there's no escaping these memories once they start.

All you can do is witness them until the end. No matter how much she wishes they could just walk away from this, that Atsushi doesn't have to see her shame.

And maybe it's already too late. Because there's a group of girls approaching the Ange from the memory, surrounding her. They're all smiling just a little bit too wide.

"Ushiromiya-san, what is this?"

"Why are you looking so gloomy in the morning?"

"You're totally ruining the mood!" ]

[undermoonlight]

[Atsushi can recognize the tone of a bully. He's been on the receiving end too many times himself and the sound makes his body tense. Hearing those voices turned to Ange is also lighting a flame under his anger, but Atsushi tries to keep his temper at a low simmer. She needs to be his focus, not those girls.]

I can look away if you want, Ange-chan.

[Or at least, he can try. If it were his memories, he'd want her to avert her gaze as well.]

[entreats]

...

[ Ange doesn't immediately reply. Perhaps it's since she seems to be struggling with some complicated emotion over here, if her current facial expression is any indication. She's frowning, but rather than purely being angry, it looks more like she's just.. really upset.

And the upset makes her emotions cloud her reasoning even more, making it harder to give Atsushi an answer. She kind of wants him to look away, but would that be fair to ask of him here? When she is the one who - accidentally - dragged him into her memory in the first place? ]

I mean.. you've already seen it now.

[ Not that this is the full extent of the bullying. And indeed, the girls still seem to be harassing the Ange in the memory, seeming to drive her further and further into a corner of the hallway.

None of the other girls passing even seem to pay it any mind, like this is just normal, rather than anything concerning. ]

It's just more of this. .. A lot of this.

[undermoonlight]

[What he would do to interfere with this memory... Atsushi is becoming less and less concerned with being a boy in an all-girl's school. He clenches his fists at his side, reminding himself over and over that he can't do anything to stop the girls from backing that Ange into a literal corner.

Why isn't anyone doing anything? A naïve part of him still wonders that. But he knows the answer. If you single out one kid and all join forces to bully them, then you can ensure that you won't be the one kid who gets bullied. No one is going to help Ange, because no one wants to be the next girl cornered.]

It doesn't have to be part of your present.

[Though Atsushi says this, he's still watching the other Ange. If it were him and his memories, he wouldn't want for anyone to see the bullied child that he once was. He would be ashamed of how powerless he was. So it's not very fair for him to watch Ange's memory, when Atsushi wouldn't want her watching his.

Extra points to his hypocrisy stat when he asks:]

... Why did you have to put up with this?

[entreats]

[ It's tempting to flee that question. Literally, even - but where would she go? Ange is pretty sure that there's some sort of border to this memory. A radius around the Ange of the memory that she can't leave.

She could do it figuratively. She could avoid the question. She could refuse to answer. Knowing Atsushi, he'd probably respect her wishes. But on the other hand.. the reason why she was bullied is a lot easier to share with people than the bullying itself. At least it doesn't make her look so stupidly vulnerable.

As vulnerable as the Ange in the memory, backed into a corner. The girls still rattling on against her, starting to giggle.

"Ushiromiya-san, why are you even still here?"

"Yeah, yeah! If I were you, I totally would just have died already, Ushiromiya-san!"

Ange tries really hard to not look at that, instead staring at a point in space somewhere near Atsushi's shoulder. (Because looking him in the face is hard, too.) ]

I mean, why does anyone? Those girls were just looking for someone to pick on. And someone without parents is a pretty easy target, right?

[ She shrugs a little, but absolutely nothing about the motion is nonchalant. ]

Not to mention that my aunt forced me to go to this secluded school, just because she wanted to get rid of me as much as she can.