I love you and that's all I really know

[reddosmod]

FEBRUARY 2022 EVENT

IMAGE DESCRIPTORS IN ORDER OF APPEARANCE
Prompt One
[Image One: Bloody fingers hovering over chalice of blood.]
[Image Two: Semi-nude people dancing in circle with joined hands.]

Prompt Two
[Image One: Hauntingly large man coming up behind young girl while other girl screams.]
[Image Two: Old woman walking towards a panicked young woman.]

Prompt Three
[Image One: Obscure, nude bodies twisted together in a circle. Non-graphic.]
[Image Two: Nun holding holy book while red liquid pours from unseen face.]

Prompt Four
[Image One: Chocolates.]
[Image Two: Chocolate.]

[NAVIGATION]

Prompt 1 • Prompt 2 • Prompt 3 • Prompt 4 • Plotting • Newsletter

[JUMP TO COMMENTS]

BONDING PACTS

WHEN: Anytime
WHERE: Anywhere
CONTENT WARNINGS: Blood ceremony, bodily ceremony, telepathic/empathetic connections, possible forced/coerced relationships.

---

[From BEGINNERS GUIDE FOR BLOOD PACTS. Found in the Archives:]

"There are a variety of blood pacts one can make, but the most popular are Bonding Pacts. Bonding Pacts should never be made on a whim: they are a serious commitment.

PROCEED WITH CAUTION!
We can thank the Doorway for Bonding Pacts. Everyone knows the story: the Reckoning was made to go fight the impossible battle against blood pollution, corruption, and beasthood. The Doorway vowed to wait for the Reckoning to return and has never moved since. This is ultimately believed to be the first Bonding Pact ever made in Trench and it is considered to have opened up Bonding Pacts as a possibility in general.

The most common misconception about Bonding Pacts is that they must be exclusively for romantic partners. This is not true The majority of Bonding Pacts, as a matter of fact, are actually familial and platonic in nature. Most romantic pairs decide that marriage is a safer option just in case someone gets a case of cold feet. On the other hand, this also means that the Bonding Pact can be the ultimate sign of devotion in a romantic relationship. We aren't interested in telling you what is right for your relationship, but the history is worth considering before taking that step.

So what is a Bonding Pact and how do you do it? Despite being one of the strongest pacts in this world, it is also one of the simplest to perform! Here's what you'll need:

1x Vial of blood per participant wishing to enter the pact
1x Small essence* of each participant
1x Live red rose
2x Live white roses
1x Pouch of ashes
1x Silver cup/container of some sort

*It was once believed that "essence" translated to organ, but we have since learned that this can be a single strand of hair, nail clipping, eyelash, teardrop, spit...You get the gist. It has to be something that came directly from your body that isn't blood.

You need to leave the silver cup out under the moonlight for at least one full night. You must complete this ceremony the evening after and only in the evening. Bonding Pacts cannot be made during the day. When you plan to begin the ceremony, you will need to perform it in a doorway or under any type of arch. This is to allow the Doorway to bless your pact and strengthen it permanently.

You will combine all the ingredients into the cup and thoroughly stir with a fragment of bone/antler. This concoction will thicken into a pastelike consistency and it should be black in color. If it smells like fresh roses, you did it right. If it smells like rancid food, you messed it up and will have to completely redo the ceremony.

Finally, each participant will cover one hand with the paste. To seal the bond, you will need to place your hand upon the one you wish to bond with. Where you place it matters and will determine the nature of your Bonding Pact. Each will have a drastically different consequence/benefit.

ROMANTIC BONDS: Place the hand somewhere on the face. This indicates a public relationship that is to be respected by all involved. This bond will create a telepathic connection between all participants. This telepathy cannot be heard by anyone else nor can it be interfered with from distance or chaos. It is possible to bring your romantic partner back from beasthood through this connection. Extreme cases of this bond have allowed romantic partners to take over one another's minds in severe situations. It can be difficult to shelter your thoughts from your Romantic Bond partner, but it is possible. They will know when you are keeping thoughts from them. Some partners have learned to respect each other's privacy while others have gone insane from the connection.

PLATONIC BONDS: Place the hand somewhere on the chest/shoulder area. This bond will create an This bond will create a physical connection. between all participants. This physical bond will allow participants to pick up on each other's physical pain or pleasure. You will be able to know when your friend is in physical harm. This creates a "phantom pain" of sorts. This can either weaken you substantially or give you an enormous boost during a fight. Best friends have been known to harness this ability well and use each other's pain to literally get stronger during a fight with monsters. On the other hand, a strained relationship can just cause you to feel the same debilitating pain as your friend. This cannot be used to bring someone back from beasthood.

FAMILIAL BONDS: Place the hand somewhere on an appendage whether arm, leg, tail or otherwise. This bond will create an empathetic connection between all participants. This empathetic bond will allow participants to naturally know what the other is feeling and may be able to sway one another's emotions through this connection. Like the romantic bond, it cannot be ruined by distance or chaos and has been used to bring people back from beasthood. Extreme situations have allowed partners to take total emotional control. You will always know when your Familial Bond partner is in emotional distress. You can send your Familial Bond emotional support when you can feel their stress, even at a distance. While this may not always work, many have reported it can greatly alleviate corruption and can even be used to recognize corruption patterns in order to prevent it.

HOSTILE BONDS: Place this bond exclusively on the neck or on anywhere on the back. While it may seem farfetched to make a bond with your enemy, there is some merit to the madness. This will create a unique power connection between all participants. This bond will allow one another to feel the ebb and flow of one another's powers. It is said the most well-forged Hostile Bonds may even allow characters to share abilities between one another. Hostile Bonds are known to drastically increase aggression and competitive behavior between participants. This has caused hostility to stir and may even lead to hatred. However, a successful Hostile Bond that is worked on with steady communication and agreement can be enormously successful and horrifically powerful.

Once you have left your handprint on your partner's skin, the spell will take hold. The handprint will glow and everyone will briefly have a vision of the Doorway standing before them. Don't be alarmed: they are only here to solidify the connection. You will feel great warmth and then the connection will be made. The handprint will stain your skin permanetly so choose wisely. The stain may be extremely light, barely visible. For others, it may be much darker. It is unknown what causes the variation.

This pact can be performed any time of year but is strongest when performed during or near the Egg Moon. While it is not required to have an audience for this ceremony, it is believed that an audience greatly strengthens the bond. It has become customary for people to make vows in combination with the ceremony for an additional layer of power.

As a further point of caution...These bonds can be forced on an individual."

FAQ
1. These bonds cannot be broken except by extreme magical interference such as through some sort of game event, a character being dropped from the game, or something like the Blade of Agency. Death will not disturb the bond.

2. There is no "limit" to the number of participants for the ceremony. Romantic bonds can be made between multiple people. The connection will only exist between those who partook in the ceremony at the same time.

3. People can be added into a Bonding Pact at any time.

4. Gender/species has no impact on the bond.

5. People can create different bonds with the same person.

6. These bonds are open-ended and can be translated to better fit your character.

IMPENDING INTIMACY

WHEN: February
WHERE: Everywhere
CONTENT WARNINGS: Intimacy-based monster, intense themes of stalking, jealousy, possession, guilt, shame, physically violent deaths, possible themes of adultery/cheating, some negative ideaology towards promiscuity.

---

[From History of Blood Crazed Zealots: Chapter 15 Caution About Curses found in the Lumenarium:]

"Do not be fooled by this seemingly passive curse. There are few things more potent than a Blood Crazed Zealot's magic, and few emotions are stronger than that of jealousy. The story goes that one Blood Crazed Zealot was in love with another and entered a sacred blood pact to unite their blood and souls. However, the other Blood Crazed Zealot's love was not as pure, and soon they strayed in body and in mind. Of course, no secrets can be kept in a blood pact, and one thing led to the other.

The jealous and betrayed Blood Crazed Zealot created a vicious curse that still plagues the world to this day. We know of no cures, no remedies, no way to beat it. We only know how to keep it at bay. But It is always around, It is always near, and It will always follow. We have not yet determined the exact way It is transmitted from one person to the next, but we believe it has to do with exchanging some form of intimacy. Whether that be with sex, words of love, or even just saying a loved one's name, the curse will follow.

It appears as a person walking directly towards you. At first, you might not even pick it out from the crowd, until it gets closer. Then you see oddities. Water spills from its body, or its arm looks broken, or many walk along completely naked. There is something off about the creature, and worse yet, no one sees It but you and anyone previously cursed by It. It moves slowly, and it would be easy to assume that it can't really hurt you. After all, if you shoot it with a gun or tear it down with powers, it breaks apart as easily as a human body...

But then It gets up. It reforms. It is impossible to kill. It doesn't react to pain. It doesn't react to words. It changes appearances when you lose sight of it, making it almost impossible to keep your guard up against it. The last time you saw it, it might have been a little girl, but now it looks like a six foot tall man. You might buy yourself some time, might be able to distance yourself by taking a swim or a fly...But It will find you. It will always find you. It can break through doors and windows. There are no wards against it.

When it finds you, it will kill you. It matters not what your powers are, what your blood is. This creature existed with the single purpose to destroy and it has perfected the art. Once it has a hold of you, you are powerless. You first lose all abilities, and then rapidly, your life follows in one crushing moment of paralyzing fear and agonizing pain. It throws its victims to the ground and breaks their bodies apart. No one wants to find the bodies of those it has consumed. It takes only seconds to kill you. Don't let it touch you. Don't let it get close enough to touch you. It will win.

When it has finished, it begins to stalk to the person that had passed it off. It's a never-ending cycle. Person A has it then gives it to Person B who gives it to Person C. Person C dies, so it goes back to Person B until person B can find someone new to give it to. Be wary of giving affection this month. You tenderly saying your beloved's name or engaging in sex or flirtation might just pass the curse along."

FAQ
1. The curse is meant to be severely undermined. The creature appears as an ordinary, unsettling-looking person with no obvious abilities. It can kill anyone regardless of their abilities or species.

2. The curse can be passed by saying a loved one's name (platonic/romantic/familial), sex, kissing, loving touches. To break the curse, one can sleep with a Trenchie or say the name of a loved one not present in Trench.

MOTHER'S MERCY

WHEN: The hex only appears during February
WHERE: Everywhere
CONTENT WARNINGS: Religious based trauma/forced guilt/shame, extreme themes of self-mutilation and possible sucidial ideations, hexes, altered mental state, forced confessions.

---

[A sermon by Mother Mercy as recorded by an unnamed Disciple, followed by an attached document titled MOTHER'S FORGIVENESS. A misspelling or unusual wording throughout the sermon is intentional. Disciples debate whether the document was intended as support of Mother Mercy's hex or as a way to help people avoid it. The sermon and Mother's Forgiveness are written in different handwriting. The documents can be found at the Pale Sanctuary:]

THE SERMON
"It was in the midst of Febuawry that the Doorway suummoned me for council,
They had fallen in love with the Reckoning and desird to create an eternal bond,
They wanted to have me present at the seremony to [provide] blessings,
Yet it was with regret I [had to] deny them their wish and instead provide cawsion,
But you see, that is the role of a Mother. We tell our spawn what they do not want to hear but muust.
It is a Mother's Mercy to pass on wisdom, to show compassion and care.

I told the Doorway that we live in a cruuel world, a cruuel world that can rawt a gewd heart,
I told the Doorway that it would be kindr to leave bonds uuntethered,
That it would be a kindness to both to let their love lingr and fade,
Than to let it be subjected to the atrocities of this world's bluud lost.
For what is a strongr emotion than jealousy? I ask of you.
What is a strongr emotion than loneliness? I ask of you.
What is a strongr emotion than longing? I ask of you.
What drives people to insanity quickr than being denied their heart's desires?
No, I told them, they should let go, for a Pthumerian owes this world selflessness,
And a Pthumerian's love can permanently stain this world in a way no one else can.
It would be a kindness to all.

But the Doorway did not want to listen. The Doorway defied [my] advice and created bonds,
The Doorway opened an eternal connection to the Reckoning, The Doorway stained this earth with the consequence of love, of relationships.
Do not be fewled by the luuxury of these words.
There is suuch a thing as selfless love, and this was not it, And so the time came for me to regrettably be proven right.

The corruuption of our cruuel world festered as people created bonds,
For the bonds made the agony of loss so much greater.
With the Doorway's curse*1, people who lost their family, their spouses, their friends also lost themselves.
Loss is painful no matter how you enduure, but the Doorway's curse ensuured it would ruun*2 deep into your soul.
It would corrupt. It would ruun*2.
This was not merciful. This was not love.

And so I counseled the Reckoning to go and keep the corruption at bay,
The Reckoning will not return to the Doorway for corruption will never end,
For beasthewd will never end.
The Reckoning keeps her sword high, and the Doorway will wait for eternity for a lover who will never return.
This is a mother's mercy. Perhaps one day, the Doorway will dissolve their curse.

Now let us bow our heads and pray. And remember, my Disciples, abstain from the curse.
Regulate your desires. This is not to cast shame, but to cast cawsion."

*1: The "curse" refers to the Bonding Pacts that are now popular in Trench. There may be some logic to Mother Mercy's rhetoric given the intensity of corruption experienced post-Bonding Pact. However, one could argue there is an equally high chance of counter-corruption due to deepening relationships through blood magic.

*2: It would appear that the word "ruin" and "run" were spelled the same at this time.

[Footnotes are in the Wayward Watcher's handwriting and clearly added at a much later date than the original sermon was recorded due to the darker quality of the ink. The following document "Mother's Forgiveness" is in the Wayward Watcher's handwriting as well.]

MOTHER'S FORGIVENESS
"Thus shortly after the sermon, a hex began to spread throughout Trench. The source of which seemed to be people who were actively resisting personal desire in some shape. People who tried to resist lust or love or other basic desires began to experience convulsions of pain. The internal agony would rapidly escalate the more they resisted "temptation" and eventually, people found one of the only ways to alleviate this pain was to mutilate themselves. A small cut would bring some relief, but the more harm they brought themselves, the more relief they felt.

I have theorized that this may be the first incident of Sleepers transforming themselves into the Blood Crazed Zealots. This was the first time I began to experience Sleepers who had permanently modified their physical bodies in drastic ways. Many would seem content with the modifications but their personalities were distorted by exacerbated corruption. Those who avoided harming themselves would fall into beasthood in alarming numbers. For a while, the only solution the Hunters and I believed in was to mercifully put these creatures out of their misery.

I quickly learned that many people, especially Sleepers, had burrowed down so many desires that it became an outright plague of corruption throughout the city. We needed to do more than just hunting down those who fell to it. The bodies were piling in numbers and the blood pollution was creating more beasts than we were killing. I sought out Mother Mercy and demanded a solution. I reasoned with her that while she may want to avoid the Doorway's blood magic, it was unfair to allow Sleepers to go punished so severely for a Pthumerian's choices.

Eventually, we came to an agreement. She would purify those who came to the Pale Sanctuary and asked for her forgiveness. They must confess their desires to lift the hex. Mother Mercy will, fittingly, take mercy on those who wish to redeem themselves. Be careful of your desires, Sleeper, for if you keep them locked up, they may just be your ruin. Confessions to Mother Mercy should be a last resort. To avoid the hex, consider honesty.

Good Luck,
The Wayward Watcher."

FAQ
1. The "desires" do not need to be romantic or sexual. They can be someone who desires to resolve an issue, someone who wants to have more friends, the desire to be successful/powerful/famous etc. The "desires" should be prominent. Small desires like wanting a donut for breakfast will not cause harm.

2. Crippling feelings of guilt over desire will consume and corrupt. Characters can avoid the hex by admitting their desires to someone. It does not have to be to Mother Mercy.

3. Those who confess to others or Mother Mercy will feel immediate relief of the hex. People can experience the hex multiple times if they go back to hiding their desires.

4. Confessions can be given to anyone. If you're in love with someone, you can just confess it to a friend rather than the person you are in love with. Of course, it's not like Sleepers would know that...It would be easy to think you have to be forced to confess to your loved one.

5. Characters do not need to self-mutilate for this prompt. Many can just go through their usual corruption stages/beasthood that you would have planned for your characters ahead of time. This is intended to be a bit of history for the Blood Crazed Zealots. You can be flexible on how your character goes to extremes to alleviate their pain. This may include substance abuse, irrational behavior, etc.

THE CHOCOLATIER: BONUS PROMPT

WHEN: February (Chocolates can be saved for the future via freezing.) The drive to find the Chocolatier only lasts during February.
WHERE: All throughout Trench and surrounding areas.
CONTENT WARNINGS: Themes of temptation (non-sexual and/or sexual), addiction, blood sacrifice, severely warped personality/reality including temporary amnesia, inability to use body, paranoia, vomiting organs, homicidal feelings, mild body horror.

---

"What is the weight of your pleasure?"

You hear the gravely, sexless voice greet you somewhere in the streets of Trench. You knew the creature had not been there just a minute ago, but now you are no longer alone. A creature roughly the size of an elephant sits beside you, a chalice hovering in the air between its outstretched hands.

The scent of chocolate wafts from the creature. But this isn't just the smell of chocolate. It is the experience of pleasure itself. You can feel the warm melt of chocolate over your tongue, your body wrapped up in inexplicable warmth and silky softness, something whispering across your skin. Your scalp tingles as if someone were playing with your hair or you just heard the best song in your life. It's like sinking into your own bed after getting home from a long trip away.

It's nearly impossible to resist the stupor the creature puts you in. The Chocolatier gazes at you calmly. This is an infamous beast, rare to show its face, but known among locals as one of the most dangerous...For no one can bring themselves to slay it. They dare not even write about it in fear of this creature being capable of taking pleasure away from Trench altogether. Corruption has thoroughly consumed this soul, any sense of self lost, but is this truly the kind of beast that Hunters wish to bring down? It pacifies all those that meet it, even the most violent of souls. The desire to fight, to be hostile will be greatly diminished in its presence. Surely...Surely it cannot be bad.

"I only ask for a token of your blood. For that, I will give everything...Your pleasure, your desire...It is yours. In one single bite...Or perhaps...You may think to give one of my chocolates to someone you admire...For surely...Who could resist such a gift...?" It offers its chalice. "Just a drop will do, my friend..." It seems like such a reasonable request for such a grand gift. Common sense would normally be kicking in right about now, but the Chocolatier drives common sense from the mind and replaces it with sheer want. Someone with mental protection abilities, enchantments or blessed items may be able to resist the temptation and step away. Most people however will likely give over a drop (or more) of blood. The more blood you give, the more chocolates you receive...

And oh! Even if you dislike chocolate or typically can't eat it, you know that you can eat this piece. You know that you will like this chocolate. It's perfect in every way. It was made exactly for you...Or perhaps, even, a special someone in your life. A chocolate for your friend, your lover, your sibling, or...maybe even your enemy. Once you have been given the chocolate, the Chocolatier vanishes. You don't have to eat the chocolate right away, but the longer you resist, the greater the temptation will become. God forbid you lose the chocolate. Some have gone completely insane by the loss. Maybe you should just eat it or get it to your buddy!

There are a wide variety of chocolates you may be blessed with and each one has a different effect. The Chocolatier may seek you out multiple times, but it seems impossible to intentionally summon the Chocolatier.

All effects last a few hours to a few days. Consuming paleblood or darkblood will help alleviate symptoms. All chocolates may lead to corruption and beasthood if they get out of control. Resisting the symptoms worsens effects. While these chocolates are intended to set up new connections, the effects will be doubled if the effect is layering on a pre-existing situation (ie; if you eat a dark chocolate around the person you're sleeping with, you'll find them even more irresistible. If you eat a milk chocolate around your significant other, you'll feel even more in love). You can eat multiple chocolates at once to experience multiple effects at once.

Milk Chocolate: This will inspire extreme romantic attraction to the first person you interact with after eating this chocolate regardless of if you know them. Melted and consumed with other food, it will provide additional feelings of being loved.

Dark Chocolate: This will inspire extreme sexual attraction to the first person you interact with of your preferred gender(s) after consuming. This has been used as a powerful aphrodisiac. Melted and put directly on the skin, it can cause extreme pleasure.

White Chocolate: You desperately want to befriend the first person you interact with after consuming. Melted and consumed with other food, it will provide additional feelings of security in your relationships.

Caramel: You will feel deeply indebted to the first person you interact with after consuming. You will want to do anything they ask, be anything they ask, and follow every order or command they give you.

Almond: You will be extremely compelled to communicate exclusively through song to other people. You will also be compelled to randomly sing your inner monologue and overshare via a spontaneous, musical number.

Raspberry: This will cause you to start vomiting a variety of organs. They aren't your organs. Some of the organs may still be functioning when they come up.

Orange: You will begin to completely confuse people for each other. Their faces and names will swap around in your mind. You might mistake your best friend for your partner. You will have difficulty remembering who is who.

Strawberry: Your emotions will be projected from you without your control through an aura. This aura can provide visual cues (such as a golden light around you when you are happy or a blue when you are sad) as well as smells and possibly even sounds.

Cherry: This will make you extremely flirty and cheerful. You will find it difficult to be in a bad mood and wind up hitting on people regardless of your personal attraction to them.

Coconut: This will cause temporary amnesia either long-term or short-term. Some people may have false memories put in their heads by this chocolate, many of which will be better than the lives they originally lived.

Coffee: This will cause extremely erratic, irrational behavior. You will become reckless and arrogant, making moves in situations you normally never would. It can boast confidence and ego. The crash from this chocolate is terrible and feels worse than a hangover.

Hazelnut: Some physical marker will appear on your body to show that you are romantically and/or sexually compatible with someone. This may be their name appearing on your skin, the first words they ever said to you, or your eye color changing to theirs. This does not force sexual/romantic attraction but rather lets you know who you might make a good match with!

Peanutbutter: You now have animal features of some sort. Dog ears, wings, new eyes. This has been known to provide temporary abilities similar to the animal you have been combined with. Some have even been known to be able to transform completely into the animal at this time!

Peacan: You will drastically lose function over certain body parts. This can cause feelings like your arm is no longer there or under your control. It may cause a complete surrender of your bodily functions in general.

Truffle: You will feel a crushing sense of paranoia that something is controlling you, watching you, and dictating the experiences around you. You will become increasingly suspicious of interactions and start theorizing about little things.

Vanilla: You will become obsessed with specific individuals and begin to actively plot their murder and likely attempt to commit it. This isn't just bloodlust: it's plotting violence. It's about wanting to get away with murder as much as committing murder.

CODING

Comments

Natsume Takashi | Natsume Yuujinchou | Paleblood

[natzoom]

i. the chocolatier | cw: just wacky hijinks

[Natsume isn't usually a huge sweets person, but -- well, the standard Chocolatier effects happened, and he ends up with a big handful of them. Considering that he still can't cook anything more elaborate than a sandwich, he decides that throwing them away would be a waste, so he absently nibbles at one or two as he wanders around Trench, still trying to get his bearings.]

a) peanut butter [The first one he tries is, of course, the peanut butter one. There was absolutely no way Natsume was going to get out of this without animal features of some kind. Stereotypically, the ears he gets are those of a cat -- orange tabby to be specific. There is, of course, a tail to go with them. A tail that promptly coils around a nearby lamppost, jerking Natsume to a halt.

He frowns, twisting around and glaring at the new appendage.] Stop that. [The strangeness isn't that he has a seemingly self-aware tail, but that this hasn't ever happened to him before.]

b) strawberry [Strawberry isn't too sugary of a flavor, so Natsume feels fairly lucky to have picked that one next. What's less lucky is the sudden, grey cloud that appears above his head. He leans back to look up at it, frowning, the still-present pointed ears twitching and pressing back against his head.

This makes it darken in color, which in turn prompts an even deeper scowl.] What's this?

c) cherry [This one is definitely the worst. Natsume will take a thousand little black rainclouds, a million animal transformations over this. He just beamed at a shopkeeper, tail twitching, hearts in his eyes, thanking them profusely for their outstanding service as a market professional. The poor man was clearly baffled, at least four times Natsume's age and working alongside his wife.

Now, Natsume is sitting on the curb, face buried in his hands, debating the merits of crawling into a hole until this entire thing is done.]

ii. mother's mercy | cw: self-harm (unintentional, fingernails in palms, possible escalation in thread), mentions of child neglect/abandonment

[Wanting things isn't anything new for Natsume. Basic human psychology says that when you're a lonely, unwanted child shuffled from home to home, you grow up with a fairly deep-seated envy towards anyone who had a normal childhood. You see other kids with their parents or their siblings or their friends and you ache for that exact thing, so deeply and strongly that it chokes you from the inside out. Because there you are with your things in boxes, waiting on a front porch to be picked up by another stranger, and you're counting down the days until you turn eighteen and don't have to do this anymore, but a part of you still hopes that this time will be different. This time they won't be scared away, they won't say you're too strange, too frightening, too much. This time you'll stay.

And it had, for a little while. Back in the real world, Natsume had just started letting go of that anticipation, had finally unpacked his boxes and exhaled into his new life and it was good. It was so good. And then he woke up on a beach and every relaxed muscle tensed right back up again, because he'd done this a hundred times before. At least this time he got to be alone, he didn't have anyone watching over his shoulder, trying to parent him, trying to make him be a normal teenager. He'd finally gotten what he always wanted, to live alone, far away from everyone.

Except. Except it's not like he'd dreamed of. Because Natsume could remember home, he could remember the Fujiwara's and his friends at school and the youkai who knew him by name and Sensei, and they were all gone again. And it was so much worse this time, because he'd finally gotten what he'd ached for all those years, only to have it wrenched away from him again. He'd forgotten how to not care about it.

Seeing the homes and families people in Trench have built is what really prompts the hex, in the end. It tempts Natsume, whispers to him that maybe if he tried, if he reached out first, if he went against every lesson he'd ever learned, he might get that too. He might find people here who he could care about. Natsume refuses every temptation, of course, turns it aside, even as it eats him up with jealousy, even as he stops and watches someone out in the markets or at the Library or other places around town.

Natsume watches, and that ugly, angry, desperate guilt flares up inside him, prompting him to curl his hands into tight, tight fists, nails biting into his palms. He doesn't notice he's doing it, doesn't register the blood welling up between his fingers and drip-drip-dripping onto the cobblestones. He just recognizes that something made that envious guilt ease, for a moment.]

um cherry obviously because im the devil

[givehead]

(Poor Natsume. Dirk wasn't even looking for him. He's just taking a stroll, minding his own damn business when he catches sight of the boy. Obviously he makes a beeline straight for him and twirls about on his heel to lean up against the lamp just next to Natsume. He digs out a cigarette, slips it between his lips, and lights up. Clearly, he intended to stick around.)

We keep runnin' into each other, kitten. Are you lost again?

immaculate content, god fcking bless

[natzoom]

[Ah, he's in hell. This is hell. Awesome.

The stupid chocolate effects react before Natsume's logical mind can, prompting him to look up, cat ears twitching in interest, tail curling and swaying behind him, and chirp:] Why? Afraid I'll follow you home?

[This would be more effectively flirtatious if Natsume didn't immediately follow it up by yanking his shirt collar up over his furiously blushing face and half-screaming in frustration.]

peanut butter

[traversal]

[ the animal features are at least cute? and one that momentarily distracts lumine, promptly pausing in her tracks to keep herself from slamming into him when he suddenly stops walking in front of her, the outcry surprising her afterward.

her eyes flicker from the tail curled around the lamppost to his exasperated expression to his twitching. she has to slip her hands into her pocket, fingers curling into the fabric so as not to rudely grab said ears and touch them. ]

Do you ... need help?

[ where's your fat cat, natsume? sensei can totally help you cope ... ]

[natzoom]

[Honestly, Natsume has been missing Sensei much more than he ever could've anticipated -- there may or may not be a pillow wadded up into a lump that he sleeps next to, missing the warm shape of the fat cat next to him in bed -- but this is the rare moment where he's glad the youkai isn't present. Sensei would find Natsume's entire predicament hilarious. He'd never live it down.

It's almost as bad having strangers see it. The twitchy, pointy cat ears droop a bit in embarrassment, and Natsume quickly shakes his head.] A-Ah no, thank you, I'm all right. I'm...sure it'll stop in a moment.

[traversal]

[ ... with that tail tightly coiled around the lamppost, she doesn't have a lot of confidence that it'll stop soon. lack of control over his appendage, perhaps? and while lumine offered to help him out, she's not entirely sure how to go about with it either. it doesn't seem like coaxing it to let go would work, either.

her omen, now curious about the debacle happening before her companion, appears in a wisp of darkness and blood and prowls across her shoulder to watch the entire scene. ]

Is this something that happens to you often?

[natzoom]

[Oh, there's another of those...magic animal things. Natsume hasn't spent any time focusing on summoning his own, so he remains doubtful that they're actually real, but...the evidence is starting to outweigh these doubts.

He frowns a little, towards the tail.] The tail itself or it not obeying me? No, on both counts.

[traversal]

[ oh ... so it's one of those incidents, then. she's also had the unfortunate episode of suddenly growing cat ears a few days ago, so he's not alone in that. still, her tail had been more or less well-behaved compared to his, her own omen agreeing as it nudges the side of her face. which is, she knows, unhelpful to his current predicament. ]

Did you happen to eat something strange?

[ like she did, with the chocolate ... ]

[natzoom]

[Natsume frowns for a moment, as his tail unloops from the lamp post and coils around his wrist instead. He impatiently shakes it off.]

Nothing strange, just some -- [Oh. Ohhhhh.] The chocolates. From that big -- thing.

ia

[tealeafs]

[ Honestly, when Chizuru is walking down the street and suddenly spots someone with animal ears and a tail, she doesn't even assume that it's because of some sort of hijinks going on in this place. She has already seen so many odd things by now that it feels perfectly normal to her that there could be people in this place who are half-cat, half-person.

Which makes the oddest thing about the sight of Natsume standing there not his animal features, as much as the odd part is just the way he seems to be talking to..

.. no one..?

Chizuru cautiously glances around, just to confirm there's no one he could be speaking to in this moment.

A moment later, however, she seems to realise that means there is one person left he could be talking to right now. ]

W-Wait, I need to stop what?

[ Because clearly he's talking to her, right? At least that makes more sense than him talking to his tail. ]

[natzoom]

[For a moment, Natsume is alarmed by the interruption, blinking at the stranger blankly, trying to figure out what on earth she's talking about. His tail uncoils, perking up and twitching to and fro in curiosity.

Then it hits him.] A-Ah, sorry, I'm -- I was -- talking to, uh. To my tail.

[tealeafs]

.. you were talking.. to your tail..?

[ At least it makes Chizuru look a little less worried - but that worry is quickly traded in for confusion, if her facial expression is anything to go by. She is staring at Natsume as if she's not entirely sure what he means.

Maybe she misheard him? Or maybe his 'tail' means something else where he comes from?

Either way, after a moment of mental fretting, Chizuru just says: ]

Sorry, but I'm.. not quite sure I understand.

[natzoom]

[Well, at least the hot flush of embarrassment rising in his cheeks distracts from the strangeness of having new appendages. After hesitating for a moment, Natsume decides to be honest -- after all, she probably already thinks he's insane.]

I, um...I thought it might be a spirit playing a trick. [Turning into a tail might be an odd choice, but spirits are odd creatures.]

[tealeafs]

Oh.

[ At first it's just a slight noise, without any real emotion behind it. Like Chizuru's brain is still very much busy registering what Natsume is telling her here..

.. but then the registering hits overdrive. Chizuru's eyes widen, her jaw dropping so her mouth hangs open as she repeats, with more surprise now: ]

Oh..!

[ At least she doesn't seem to find his statement odd, as much as she seems to find it surprising. After all, Chizuru did learn demons exist and that she is one only recently, so who knows, spirits might as well be real too. ]

Are you worried that you might be possessed by a spirit..? Um, one that.. made you grow a tail..? [ There's a hint of sympathy, even in the middle of her surprise. ]

[natzoom]

[Natsume blinks a couple times, because that's...exactly what he's concerned about, yes. He's actually surprised she came to that idea so swiftly. But he finally nods.]

Ah, yes, that. Although I don't feel possessed. [He's gotten better about telling.] So it feels more like...a trick being played.

i. the chocolatier — peanut butter aka Hereditary's Paimon meets his first Anime Cat Boy

[possessum]

( Peter's not out and about much these days. There's nothing quite like someone's lover being publicly threatened on the network to make someone incredibly wary to leave her by herself, and he's been sticking to Luna like glue. ....Even more than he already does.

In the rare times they are apart, Peter's wide-eyed and nervous (so pretty much the same as always), and today he's on his way back home from a little shopping trip to the hub of town, a couple of bags tucked into his arms. It's cold out and he's all bundled up, head dipped down. He hears the person before he ever sees him — a Stop that pausing him in his tracks. The older boy immediately looks up, startled and guilty for no reason, to see....

...a cat boy.

Now. Peter's heard of these, of course he has; he's from 2018. It's quite another thing to witness one in person, however. He looks a little afraid, but also a little concerned, because the boy's tail is wrapped around a lamppost.... )

Oh. Are you uh... stuck?

y'know like nyah

[natzoom]

[Usually Natsume is much more watchful than this. He has to be, it's come with years and years of experience -- if he isn't paying attention to his surroundings, something ominous or malevolent has no difficulty getting closer. Then it can attack, which at best severely inconveniences him and at worst, lands him in the hospital. When he was younger, it was harder to determine which of the entities he saw were spirits and which were people -- they all looked the same to him back then.

But as he's grown, that sense of when someone is off has developed as well. It takes him only a moment or so to determine whether he's talking to a person or something else, even if they're carefully hidden. Natsume supposes a great deal of that has to do with the strength of the spirit -- lower-level ones tend to not alert him as much as powerful ones.

That's probably why as soon as he looks up at the unfamiliar young man, he immediately breaks out into shivers, like he's just plunged in freezing cold water. The sense is stronger than he's ever felt it, sending goosebumps up his spine, clouding his head, making his breath tight in his throat. It's something akin to what he'd felt seeing Sensei's true form for the first time -- massive, powerful, overwhelming. Godlike.

Even the pesky appendage coiled around the lamppost reacts, puffing up like a cat in a thunderstorm, crooking up at an alert angle. The cat ears do too, pressing back flat against Natsume's head as he stares at the stranger. There's an unmistakable urge to bolt, to get as far away as he can, as fast as he can.

But then, beneath it, is a faint sense of recognition. Natsume's been told that he has uncommonly strong spiritual power, that it seeps out of him uncontrollably, like a neon sign to spirits and demons. Maybe it's that part of him that feels so much power and is drawn to it.

Eventually, he remembers how to speak, faint and far-away:] No. I'm all right.

cw: bullying an anime

[possessum]

( It really isn't often that Peter's looked at like that. But despite that fact, it catches against him so quick and fast with the feeling of familiarity. Maybe it's because he's always afraid to be looked at like that. Like he's something — bad.

His mother tried to hide it, but it was there. Peter saw it sometimes: glimpses of those feelings towards him. Some underlying thing. It came out more and more after Charlie died, like something in his mother was let loose then, freed. Her hatred of him.

This boy isn't necessarily looking at him with hate, but it's in the same category as the other things: disgust, aversion, fear. That's how he's looking at him, Peter realises, that's really how it is. Fear. He's been on the other end of it too many times: that feeling like you want to run but you're frozen to the ground. He just stares back in silence, eyes a little too wide, like he's the one who's scared instead.

He's being seen, and Peter doesn't quite understand that, but something else does. Something that was sleeping, and is suddenly awake. It happens very quickly, and the older boy's suddenly letting go of the bags in his arms. They fall to the ground, contents spilling out: apples rolling, bread and cheese and other things.

Paimon's felt spiritual power before, but this — this is a league all in its own. It almost seems impossible, like it's flooding him, too much for him. It raises his hackles to begin with, alerts him in a strange way; suddenly, Peter's slender body isn't standing tall and unmoving anymore. It's down on the ground, crouched like something more insect than animal, arms and legs bent at sharp angles. Every single piece of its energy is fixed on the being, the demon king's enormous presence so bright and loud it's like a light swelling and bursting, painful.

He starts circling the boy, and getting closer as he does, moving in. Head twitching, eyes and mouth held open wide, stretching. But he can't hold back for long at all, can't control himself. Suddenly— he springs, and his intention will be to knock the boy down, scrabble atop him. From there... he doesn't know. Does Paimon want to kill him or keep him, this thing in boy's skin with such strong spiritual power? He just needs to be closer to it. Impossibly closer. )

[natzoom]

[Perhaps absurdly, Natsume is almost...relieved when the strange boy's entire persona and aura changes. Having that creeping, uncomfortable sense of otherness while looking at what seems to just be another teenager is always uncomfortable. He's met enough supernatural creatures by now to know that they very often take on the appearance of something entirely mundane, but it's much easier when the veil is lifted.

He blinks a couple times, recoiling slightly from the sudden change in intensity -- from merely a bright light to the sun itself, reminiscent of a very high-level youkai. Or a god. That makes more sense, a god, a deity of some sort. Natsume has met a couple of those, and they always have a sense of grandeur about them, warranted or not, something between arrogance and dignity. It's very much like he imagines meeting a member of royalty might be -- they are very aware of their own importance, and believe you should be likewise convinced.

But grandiosity or no, Natsume is much more experienced at dealing with demons and spirits and monsters than he is other teenagers. The not-a-boy crouches, scuttles, leaps, and he just -- well, he just curls his hand into a fist and swings away.

The actual physical force is negligible -- Natsume is a reedy boy, small for his age, barely more than five feet tall, and his muscles are nothing to speak of. But behind it, inexplicably coiled in his scrawny body is raw, untamed spirital energy, like putting the force of an atomic bomb behind a spitball. He throws a punch at the strange not!boy's face, the closest thing he can reach, and says very sternly:] Stop that.

[possessum]

( Whatever Paimon was expecting— it isn't this.

He's struck before he can even really register what's happening, and the force is almost absurdly, impossibly strong. It can't possibly be human — and perhaps he shouldn't be surprised after all, given what he's felt from the young man's energy.

But it's so much, so powerful, that it sends him backwards, knocked right off of his feet and falling over flat onto his back. The back of his head hits the ground, hard, but he barely registers this. All of the pain is focused where he was struck, and pain is a concept that the demon is often detached from, but not this time. No, it fucking hurts, and he's just lying there with his eyes wide open, stunned, almost looking comatose with his long arms on either side of him, body flat to the ground, staring straight up. He doesn't move, or breathe, or utter a sound.

Perhaps his vessel's body has died. Perhaps he'll be evicted from it, released. These are concerns, but Paimon's not even able to really worry about them. He's just.......... stunned. After a long moment of lying there in shock and pain, he does finally speak, whispering, though his body doesn't move. )

I... am broken.

( He's not broken. Peter's body is fine, and if he tried to move, he'd be able to. He just....... thinks he's been destroyed by that enormous spiritual power. )

ii

[wwrench]

Loss is such a strange thing. Sometimes you can almost entirely forget what you're missing, and then out of nowhere a sudden breeze knocks you back to the most desperate and lonely of places. Wrench hasn't been fairing well since coming here, either. If Deerington was the best of what he could have imagined for himself, this is nothing. The absence of good, and of bad. A place so undeserving of his consideration he hasn't bothered himself to find a home among it.

Which is why he's going by Wrench again. Why he's prone to wandering, and why he's constantly vacillating between bouts of isolation and efforts to connect. He's got nowhere in particular he's headed as he wanders with a bag of foraged spoils slung on his back. It's the pinching scent of blood in his nostrils he notices first, before his gaze lands on the boy standing alone with the sticky red running from his palms. Of course, he approaches.

Hey, Wrench waves a hand to get his attention, then gestures at his clasped fists.

[natzoom]

The tremors of grief and jealousy are still wracking through Natsume's body, and he almost doesn't notice the man approaching. Which is strange for him -- he's usually always so focused on his surroundings, trying to protect himself and also appear normal at all times.

But the wave catches his eye, and he quickly turns, looking up at the stranger with his breath tight and thick in his throat. His eyes are wide, strange-colored -- orange, catlike pupils, inhuman. But then he blinks, lowers his head and looks down at his hands, with the red streaking between each finger.

"Oh." It comes out soft, croaky, and Natsume slowly forces his hands to uncurl, looking at the eight neat half-moon cuts he's left on his own palms. "Oh, I'm...I'm sorry, I...thank you."

[wwrench]

The look in the boy's strange eyes is one Wrench knows all too well. He's seen it time and time again in strangers and friends alike, and it never sits comfortably with him. Even less so when there's no direct cause he can identify. It's the lack of understanding that puts him on guard, and his gaze flits around their immediate surroundings before returning to the boy he's already decided he can't just leave alone in the state he's found him.

Fortunately, whatever's possessed him to dig into himself like that doesn't seem to have any kind of unbreakable hold. He sucks air in through the spaces between his teeth when the release of the pressure makes the blood flow more rapidly. Wrench knows that pinch of pain well enough to feel a sudden burst of empathy for it. It's as if the sight and smell of the blood in the air has made it even more personally painful.

Wrench draws a scrap of clean cloth out of his pocket and hands it over before drawing out his Omni and typing a message. What happened?

[natzoom]

Natsume shakes out his hands a couple times, sending blood droplets scattering, then he winces, mumbling another apology and curling his hands back into fists -- looser this time, mostly so he doesn't get blood all over the place. He's already thinking about bandages, disinfectant, very stupid of him to cause the injuries, stupid, stupid, stupid boy--

But then the stranger is offering a scrap of cloth, and Natsume hesitates only a moment before accepting it. "Thank you." The typing gets a thoughtful headtilt, and he almost opens his mouth to say that he can't read English fluently -- except apparently he can, now. How weird.

"...ah." Still thrown off by being able to read the words, Natsume ducks his head, focusing on wiping blood off his palms. "I-I was just...lost in thought. I'm sorry." More apologies.

[wwrench]

It's as if the boy's anxiety wants to choke the air around the both of them. Wrench can't help but feel agitated by it. There's something unsettling about it, and it makes him want to do whatever he can to soothe that nervous bead of energy that he can't find the cause of. When the stranger ducks his head away, he very nearly scowls. Wrench pulls back his Omni and taps at the screen just in time to catch the tail end of the spoken words. I'm sorry. The words tap themselves out on the screen, clear but lacking in context. He frowns more deeply and shakes his head.

Be sorry to your hands, not to me. Do you have somewhere to go to clean up?