I love you and that's all I really know

[reddosmod]

FEBRUARY 2022 EVENT

IMAGE DESCRIPTORS IN ORDER OF APPEARANCE
Prompt One
[Image One: Bloody fingers hovering over chalice of blood.]
[Image Two: Semi-nude people dancing in circle with joined hands.]

Prompt Two
[Image One: Hauntingly large man coming up behind young girl while other girl screams.]
[Image Two: Old woman walking towards a panicked young woman.]

Prompt Three
[Image One: Obscure, nude bodies twisted together in a circle. Non-graphic.]
[Image Two: Nun holding holy book while red liquid pours from unseen face.]

Prompt Four
[Image One: Chocolates.]
[Image Two: Chocolate.]

[NAVIGATION]

Prompt 1 • Prompt 2 • Prompt 3 • Prompt 4 • Plotting • Newsletter

[JUMP TO COMMENTS]

BONDING PACTS

WHEN: Anytime
WHERE: Anywhere
CONTENT WARNINGS: Blood ceremony, bodily ceremony, telepathic/empathetic connections, possible forced/coerced relationships.

---

[From BEGINNERS GUIDE FOR BLOOD PACTS. Found in the Archives:]

"There are a variety of blood pacts one can make, but the most popular are Bonding Pacts. Bonding Pacts should never be made on a whim: they are a serious commitment.

PROCEED WITH CAUTION!
We can thank the Doorway for Bonding Pacts. Everyone knows the story: the Reckoning was made to go fight the impossible battle against blood pollution, corruption, and beasthood. The Doorway vowed to wait for the Reckoning to return and has never moved since. This is ultimately believed to be the first Bonding Pact ever made in Trench and it is considered to have opened up Bonding Pacts as a possibility in general.

The most common misconception about Bonding Pacts is that they must be exclusively for romantic partners. This is not true The majority of Bonding Pacts, as a matter of fact, are actually familial and platonic in nature. Most romantic pairs decide that marriage is a safer option just in case someone gets a case of cold feet. On the other hand, this also means that the Bonding Pact can be the ultimate sign of devotion in a romantic relationship. We aren't interested in telling you what is right for your relationship, but the history is worth considering before taking that step.

So what is a Bonding Pact and how do you do it? Despite being one of the strongest pacts in this world, it is also one of the simplest to perform! Here's what you'll need:

1x Vial of blood per participant wishing to enter the pact
1x Small essence* of each participant
1x Live red rose
2x Live white roses
1x Pouch of ashes
1x Silver cup/container of some sort

*It was once believed that "essence" translated to organ, but we have since learned that this can be a single strand of hair, nail clipping, eyelash, teardrop, spit...You get the gist. It has to be something that came directly from your body that isn't blood.

You need to leave the silver cup out under the moonlight for at least one full night. You must complete this ceremony the evening after and only in the evening. Bonding Pacts cannot be made during the day. When you plan to begin the ceremony, you will need to perform it in a doorway or under any type of arch. This is to allow the Doorway to bless your pact and strengthen it permanently.

You will combine all the ingredients into the cup and thoroughly stir with a fragment of bone/antler. This concoction will thicken into a pastelike consistency and it should be black in color. If it smells like fresh roses, you did it right. If it smells like rancid food, you messed it up and will have to completely redo the ceremony.

Finally, each participant will cover one hand with the paste. To seal the bond, you will need to place your hand upon the one you wish to bond with. Where you place it matters and will determine the nature of your Bonding Pact. Each will have a drastically different consequence/benefit.

ROMANTIC BONDS: Place the hand somewhere on the face. This indicates a public relationship that is to be respected by all involved. This bond will create a telepathic connection between all participants. This telepathy cannot be heard by anyone else nor can it be interfered with from distance or chaos. It is possible to bring your romantic partner back from beasthood through this connection. Extreme cases of this bond have allowed romantic partners to take over one another's minds in severe situations. It can be difficult to shelter your thoughts from your Romantic Bond partner, but it is possible. They will know when you are keeping thoughts from them. Some partners have learned to respect each other's privacy while others have gone insane from the connection.

PLATONIC BONDS: Place the hand somewhere on the chest/shoulder area. This bond will create an This bond will create a physical connection. between all participants. This physical bond will allow participants to pick up on each other's physical pain or pleasure. You will be able to know when your friend is in physical harm. This creates a "phantom pain" of sorts. This can either weaken you substantially or give you an enormous boost during a fight. Best friends have been known to harness this ability well and use each other's pain to literally get stronger during a fight with monsters. On the other hand, a strained relationship can just cause you to feel the same debilitating pain as your friend. This cannot be used to bring someone back from beasthood.

FAMILIAL BONDS: Place the hand somewhere on an appendage whether arm, leg, tail or otherwise. This bond will create an empathetic connection between all participants. This empathetic bond will allow participants to naturally know what the other is feeling and may be able to sway one another's emotions through this connection. Like the romantic bond, it cannot be ruined by distance or chaos and has been used to bring people back from beasthood. Extreme situations have allowed partners to take total emotional control. You will always know when your Familial Bond partner is in emotional distress. You can send your Familial Bond emotional support when you can feel their stress, even at a distance. While this may not always work, many have reported it can greatly alleviate corruption and can even be used to recognize corruption patterns in order to prevent it.

HOSTILE BONDS: Place this bond exclusively on the neck or on anywhere on the back. While it may seem farfetched to make a bond with your enemy, there is some merit to the madness. This will create a unique power connection between all participants. This bond will allow one another to feel the ebb and flow of one another's powers. It is said the most well-forged Hostile Bonds may even allow characters to share abilities between one another. Hostile Bonds are known to drastically increase aggression and competitive behavior between participants. This has caused hostility to stir and may even lead to hatred. However, a successful Hostile Bond that is worked on with steady communication and agreement can be enormously successful and horrifically powerful.

Once you have left your handprint on your partner's skin, the spell will take hold. The handprint will glow and everyone will briefly have a vision of the Doorway standing before them. Don't be alarmed: they are only here to solidify the connection. You will feel great warmth and then the connection will be made. The handprint will stain your skin permanetly so choose wisely. The stain may be extremely light, barely visible. For others, it may be much darker. It is unknown what causes the variation.

This pact can be performed any time of year but is strongest when performed during or near the Egg Moon. While it is not required to have an audience for this ceremony, it is believed that an audience greatly strengthens the bond. It has become customary for people to make vows in combination with the ceremony for an additional layer of power.

As a further point of caution...These bonds can be forced on an individual."

FAQ
1. These bonds cannot be broken except by extreme magical interference such as through some sort of game event, a character being dropped from the game, or something like the Blade of Agency. Death will not disturb the bond.

2. There is no "limit" to the number of participants for the ceremony. Romantic bonds can be made between multiple people. The connection will only exist between those who partook in the ceremony at the same time.

3. People can be added into a Bonding Pact at any time.

4. Gender/species has no impact on the bond.

5. People can create different bonds with the same person.

6. These bonds are open-ended and can be translated to better fit your character.

IMPENDING INTIMACY

WHEN: February
WHERE: Everywhere
CONTENT WARNINGS: Intimacy-based monster, intense themes of stalking, jealousy, possession, guilt, shame, physically violent deaths, possible themes of adultery/cheating, some negative ideaology towards promiscuity.

---

[From History of Blood Crazed Zealots: Chapter 15 Caution About Curses found in the Lumenarium:]

"Do not be fooled by this seemingly passive curse. There are few things more potent than a Blood Crazed Zealot's magic, and few emotions are stronger than that of jealousy. The story goes that one Blood Crazed Zealot was in love with another and entered a sacred blood pact to unite their blood and souls. However, the other Blood Crazed Zealot's love was not as pure, and soon they strayed in body and in mind. Of course, no secrets can be kept in a blood pact, and one thing led to the other.

The jealous and betrayed Blood Crazed Zealot created a vicious curse that still plagues the world to this day. We know of no cures, no remedies, no way to beat it. We only know how to keep it at bay. But It is always around, It is always near, and It will always follow. We have not yet determined the exact way It is transmitted from one person to the next, but we believe it has to do with exchanging some form of intimacy. Whether that be with sex, words of love, or even just saying a loved one's name, the curse will follow.

It appears as a person walking directly towards you. At first, you might not even pick it out from the crowd, until it gets closer. Then you see oddities. Water spills from its body, or its arm looks broken, or many walk along completely naked. There is something off about the creature, and worse yet, no one sees It but you and anyone previously cursed by It. It moves slowly, and it would be easy to assume that it can't really hurt you. After all, if you shoot it with a gun or tear it down with powers, it breaks apart as easily as a human body...

But then It gets up. It reforms. It is impossible to kill. It doesn't react to pain. It doesn't react to words. It changes appearances when you lose sight of it, making it almost impossible to keep your guard up against it. The last time you saw it, it might have been a little girl, but now it looks like a six foot tall man. You might buy yourself some time, might be able to distance yourself by taking a swim or a fly...But It will find you. It will always find you. It can break through doors and windows. There are no wards against it.

When it finds you, it will kill you. It matters not what your powers are, what your blood is. This creature existed with the single purpose to destroy and it has perfected the art. Once it has a hold of you, you are powerless. You first lose all abilities, and then rapidly, your life follows in one crushing moment of paralyzing fear and agonizing pain. It throws its victims to the ground and breaks their bodies apart. No one wants to find the bodies of those it has consumed. It takes only seconds to kill you. Don't let it touch you. Don't let it get close enough to touch you. It will win.

When it has finished, it begins to stalk to the person that had passed it off. It's a never-ending cycle. Person A has it then gives it to Person B who gives it to Person C. Person C dies, so it goes back to Person B until person B can find someone new to give it to. Be wary of giving affection this month. You tenderly saying your beloved's name or engaging in sex or flirtation might just pass the curse along."

FAQ
1. The curse is meant to be severely undermined. The creature appears as an ordinary, unsettling-looking person with no obvious abilities. It can kill anyone regardless of their abilities or species.

2. The curse can be passed by saying a loved one's name (platonic/romantic/familial), sex, kissing, loving touches. To break the curse, one can sleep with a Trenchie or say the name of a loved one not present in Trench.

MOTHER'S MERCY

WHEN: The hex only appears during February
WHERE: Everywhere
CONTENT WARNINGS: Religious based trauma/forced guilt/shame, extreme themes of self-mutilation and possible sucidial ideations, hexes, altered mental state, forced confessions.

---

[A sermon by Mother Mercy as recorded by an unnamed Disciple, followed by an attached document titled MOTHER'S FORGIVENESS. A misspelling or unusual wording throughout the sermon is intentional. Disciples debate whether the document was intended as support of Mother Mercy's hex or as a way to help people avoid it. The sermon and Mother's Forgiveness are written in different handwriting. The documents can be found at the Pale Sanctuary:]

THE SERMON
"It was in the midst of Febuawry that the Doorway suummoned me for council,
They had fallen in love with the Reckoning and desird to create an eternal bond,
They wanted to have me present at the seremony to [provide] blessings,
Yet it was with regret I [had to] deny them their wish and instead provide cawsion,
But you see, that is the role of a Mother. We tell our spawn what they do not want to hear but muust.
It is a Mother's Mercy to pass on wisdom, to show compassion and care.

I told the Doorway that we live in a cruuel world, a cruuel world that can rawt a gewd heart,
I told the Doorway that it would be kindr to leave bonds uuntethered,
That it would be a kindness to both to let their love lingr and fade,
Than to let it be subjected to the atrocities of this world's bluud lost.
For what is a strongr emotion than jealousy? I ask of you.
What is a strongr emotion than loneliness? I ask of you.
What is a strongr emotion than longing? I ask of you.
What drives people to insanity quickr than being denied their heart's desires?
No, I told them, they should let go, for a Pthumerian owes this world selflessness,
And a Pthumerian's love can permanently stain this world in a way no one else can.
It would be a kindness to all.

But the Doorway did not want to listen. The Doorway defied [my] advice and created bonds,
The Doorway opened an eternal connection to the Reckoning, The Doorway stained this earth with the consequence of love, of relationships.
Do not be fewled by the luuxury of these words.
There is suuch a thing as selfless love, and this was not it, And so the time came for me to regrettably be proven right.

The corruuption of our cruuel world festered as people created bonds,
For the bonds made the agony of loss so much greater.
With the Doorway's curse*1, people who lost their family, their spouses, their friends also lost themselves.
Loss is painful no matter how you enduure, but the Doorway's curse ensuured it would ruun*2 deep into your soul.
It would corrupt. It would ruun*2.
This was not merciful. This was not love.

And so I counseled the Reckoning to go and keep the corruption at bay,
The Reckoning will not return to the Doorway for corruption will never end,
For beasthewd will never end.
The Reckoning keeps her sword high, and the Doorway will wait for eternity for a lover who will never return.
This is a mother's mercy. Perhaps one day, the Doorway will dissolve their curse.

Now let us bow our heads and pray. And remember, my Disciples, abstain from the curse.
Regulate your desires. This is not to cast shame, but to cast cawsion."

*1: The "curse" refers to the Bonding Pacts that are now popular in Trench. There may be some logic to Mother Mercy's rhetoric given the intensity of corruption experienced post-Bonding Pact. However, one could argue there is an equally high chance of counter-corruption due to deepening relationships through blood magic.

*2: It would appear that the word "ruin" and "run" were spelled the same at this time.

[Footnotes are in the Wayward Watcher's handwriting and clearly added at a much later date than the original sermon was recorded due to the darker quality of the ink. The following document "Mother's Forgiveness" is in the Wayward Watcher's handwriting as well.]

MOTHER'S FORGIVENESS
"Thus shortly after the sermon, a hex began to spread throughout Trench. The source of which seemed to be people who were actively resisting personal desire in some shape. People who tried to resist lust or love or other basic desires began to experience convulsions of pain. The internal agony would rapidly escalate the more they resisted "temptation" and eventually, people found one of the only ways to alleviate this pain was to mutilate themselves. A small cut would bring some relief, but the more harm they brought themselves, the more relief they felt.

I have theorized that this may be the first incident of Sleepers transforming themselves into the Blood Crazed Zealots. This was the first time I began to experience Sleepers who had permanently modified their physical bodies in drastic ways. Many would seem content with the modifications but their personalities were distorted by exacerbated corruption. Those who avoided harming themselves would fall into beasthood in alarming numbers. For a while, the only solution the Hunters and I believed in was to mercifully put these creatures out of their misery.

I quickly learned that many people, especially Sleepers, had burrowed down so many desires that it became an outright plague of corruption throughout the city. We needed to do more than just hunting down those who fell to it. The bodies were piling in numbers and the blood pollution was creating more beasts than we were killing. I sought out Mother Mercy and demanded a solution. I reasoned with her that while she may want to avoid the Doorway's blood magic, it was unfair to allow Sleepers to go punished so severely for a Pthumerian's choices.

Eventually, we came to an agreement. She would purify those who came to the Pale Sanctuary and asked for her forgiveness. They must confess their desires to lift the hex. Mother Mercy will, fittingly, take mercy on those who wish to redeem themselves. Be careful of your desires, Sleeper, for if you keep them locked up, they may just be your ruin. Confessions to Mother Mercy should be a last resort. To avoid the hex, consider honesty.

Good Luck,
The Wayward Watcher."

FAQ
1. The "desires" do not need to be romantic or sexual. They can be someone who desires to resolve an issue, someone who wants to have more friends, the desire to be successful/powerful/famous etc. The "desires" should be prominent. Small desires like wanting a donut for breakfast will not cause harm.

2. Crippling feelings of guilt over desire will consume and corrupt. Characters can avoid the hex by admitting their desires to someone. It does not have to be to Mother Mercy.

3. Those who confess to others or Mother Mercy will feel immediate relief of the hex. People can experience the hex multiple times if they go back to hiding their desires.

4. Confessions can be given to anyone. If you're in love with someone, you can just confess it to a friend rather than the person you are in love with. Of course, it's not like Sleepers would know that...It would be easy to think you have to be forced to confess to your loved one.

5. Characters do not need to self-mutilate for this prompt. Many can just go through their usual corruption stages/beasthood that you would have planned for your characters ahead of time. This is intended to be a bit of history for the Blood Crazed Zealots. You can be flexible on how your character goes to extremes to alleviate their pain. This may include substance abuse, irrational behavior, etc.

THE CHOCOLATIER: BONUS PROMPT

WHEN: February (Chocolates can be saved for the future via freezing.) The drive to find the Chocolatier only lasts during February.
WHERE: All throughout Trench and surrounding areas.
CONTENT WARNINGS: Themes of temptation (non-sexual and/or sexual), addiction, blood sacrifice, severely warped personality/reality including temporary amnesia, inability to use body, paranoia, vomiting organs, homicidal feelings, mild body horror.

---

"What is the weight of your pleasure?"

You hear the gravely, sexless voice greet you somewhere in the streets of Trench. You knew the creature had not been there just a minute ago, but now you are no longer alone. A creature roughly the size of an elephant sits beside you, a chalice hovering in the air between its outstretched hands.

The scent of chocolate wafts from the creature. But this isn't just the smell of chocolate. It is the experience of pleasure itself. You can feel the warm melt of chocolate over your tongue, your body wrapped up in inexplicable warmth and silky softness, something whispering across your skin. Your scalp tingles as if someone were playing with your hair or you just heard the best song in your life. It's like sinking into your own bed after getting home from a long trip away.

It's nearly impossible to resist the stupor the creature puts you in. The Chocolatier gazes at you calmly. This is an infamous beast, rare to show its face, but known among locals as one of the most dangerous...For no one can bring themselves to slay it. They dare not even write about it in fear of this creature being capable of taking pleasure away from Trench altogether. Corruption has thoroughly consumed this soul, any sense of self lost, but is this truly the kind of beast that Hunters wish to bring down? It pacifies all those that meet it, even the most violent of souls. The desire to fight, to be hostile will be greatly diminished in its presence. Surely...Surely it cannot be bad.

"I only ask for a token of your blood. For that, I will give everything...Your pleasure, your desire...It is yours. In one single bite...Or perhaps...You may think to give one of my chocolates to someone you admire...For surely...Who could resist such a gift...?" It offers its chalice. "Just a drop will do, my friend..." It seems like such a reasonable request for such a grand gift. Common sense would normally be kicking in right about now, but the Chocolatier drives common sense from the mind and replaces it with sheer want. Someone with mental protection abilities, enchantments or blessed items may be able to resist the temptation and step away. Most people however will likely give over a drop (or more) of blood. The more blood you give, the more chocolates you receive...

And oh! Even if you dislike chocolate or typically can't eat it, you know that you can eat this piece. You know that you will like this chocolate. It's perfect in every way. It was made exactly for you...Or perhaps, even, a special someone in your life. A chocolate for your friend, your lover, your sibling, or...maybe even your enemy. Once you have been given the chocolate, the Chocolatier vanishes. You don't have to eat the chocolate right away, but the longer you resist, the greater the temptation will become. God forbid you lose the chocolate. Some have gone completely insane by the loss. Maybe you should just eat it or get it to your buddy!

There are a wide variety of chocolates you may be blessed with and each one has a different effect. The Chocolatier may seek you out multiple times, but it seems impossible to intentionally summon the Chocolatier.

All effects last a few hours to a few days. Consuming paleblood or darkblood will help alleviate symptoms. All chocolates may lead to corruption and beasthood if they get out of control. Resisting the symptoms worsens effects. While these chocolates are intended to set up new connections, the effects will be doubled if the effect is layering on a pre-existing situation (ie; if you eat a dark chocolate around the person you're sleeping with, you'll find them even more irresistible. If you eat a milk chocolate around your significant other, you'll feel even more in love). You can eat multiple chocolates at once to experience multiple effects at once.

Milk Chocolate: This will inspire extreme romantic attraction to the first person you interact with after eating this chocolate regardless of if you know them. Melted and consumed with other food, it will provide additional feelings of being loved.

Dark Chocolate: This will inspire extreme sexual attraction to the first person you interact with of your preferred gender(s) after consuming. This has been used as a powerful aphrodisiac. Melted and put directly on the skin, it can cause extreme pleasure.

White Chocolate: You desperately want to befriend the first person you interact with after consuming. Melted and consumed with other food, it will provide additional feelings of security in your relationships.

Caramel: You will feel deeply indebted to the first person you interact with after consuming. You will want to do anything they ask, be anything they ask, and follow every order or command they give you.

Almond: You will be extremely compelled to communicate exclusively through song to other people. You will also be compelled to randomly sing your inner monologue and overshare via a spontaneous, musical number.

Raspberry: This will cause you to start vomiting a variety of organs. They aren't your organs. Some of the organs may still be functioning when they come up.

Orange: You will begin to completely confuse people for each other. Their faces and names will swap around in your mind. You might mistake your best friend for your partner. You will have difficulty remembering who is who.

Strawberry: Your emotions will be projected from you without your control through an aura. This aura can provide visual cues (such as a golden light around you when you are happy or a blue when you are sad) as well as smells and possibly even sounds.

Cherry: This will make you extremely flirty and cheerful. You will find it difficult to be in a bad mood and wind up hitting on people regardless of your personal attraction to them.

Coconut: This will cause temporary amnesia either long-term or short-term. Some people may have false memories put in their heads by this chocolate, many of which will be better than the lives they originally lived.

Coffee: This will cause extremely erratic, irrational behavior. You will become reckless and arrogant, making moves in situations you normally never would. It can boast confidence and ego. The crash from this chocolate is terrible and feels worse than a hangover.

Hazelnut: Some physical marker will appear on your body to show that you are romantically and/or sexually compatible with someone. This may be their name appearing on your skin, the first words they ever said to you, or your eye color changing to theirs. This does not force sexual/romantic attraction but rather lets you know who you might make a good match with!

Peanutbutter: You now have animal features of some sort. Dog ears, wings, new eyes. This has been known to provide temporary abilities similar to the animal you have been combined with. Some have even been known to be able to transform completely into the animal at this time!

Peacan: You will drastically lose function over certain body parts. This can cause feelings like your arm is no longer there or under your control. It may cause a complete surrender of your bodily functions in general.

Truffle: You will feel a crushing sense of paranoia that something is controlling you, watching you, and dictating the experiences around you. You will become increasingly suspicious of interactions and start theorizing about little things.

Vanilla: You will become obsessed with specific individuals and begin to actively plot their murder and likely attempt to commit it. This isn't just bloodlust: it's plotting violence. It's about wanting to get away with murder as much as committing murder.

CODING

Comments

Puppet Play

[obeir]

[ As fate would have it, the next puppet "victim" happens to be K. Trench fashion is still a work in progress for the android, and presently he's dressed in his customary formal attire as he makes his way down the sidewalk. The worn backpack he'd received his first day here is slung across his shoulders and he's carrying a couple bouquets of flowers, his head bowed, watching his feet while he walks.

Until he notices the strange puppet in his path. He slows to a stop and looks up, surprised to spot one of the robots from Dirk's photo standing nearby. Curious...

He's witnessed Dirk's flashstepping several times, enough to finally recognise it now — and can't help the internal wince as it brings to mind Dirk last using it to ditch him at the Red — even with as blindingly fast as he's moving. Controlling the puppet? And then Dirk's robot guardian begins playing music.

Huh. Well. K's game to play along. Why not? He'd planned to stop by Dirk's shop to drop something off anyway, so this coincidental meeting is welcome.

Shrugging off his pack, he sets it and his recent purchases aside — though not before pulling a single early season daffodil from one of the bouquets. He makes a show of standing straight before theatrically bowing to the puppet as he offers the flower to it, ever the gentleman. ]

Re: Puppet Play

[givehead]

(K is certainly the last person he anticipated seeing out and about. He looks good and just seeing him is enough to jumpstart Dirk's heart into overdrive. Shit, he really did have it bad. He darts around even quicker to burn off the nerves. He doesn't think to stop the game to properly greet K. This was just one of those weird facets of Dirk Strider everyone had to get used to eventually. The dude loved his puppets.

He's thoroughly delighted when K decides to play along. He moves Lil Cal in such a way to make him look like he was swooning, hand against forehead, another hand over his chest. The hands cover the puppet's face a moment later and it shakes violently back and forth, not too dissimilar to exaggerated blushing sequences in anime. Now holding its own cheek, the puppet takes the flower.

Shit, K acted more like a prince than Dirk has ever. Dirk decides to up the ante. He suddenly appears on one of the nearby steps, wearing casual street clothes. His body is only slightly twitching here and there, the only real indication that he was still whipping back and forth between the step and the puppet to move it.)

I think he likes you. (Dirk drawls, smiling at K.) Lil Cal has primo fuckin' taste.

(Idly, Dirk wonders what's with the flowers. He keeps his focus on keeping Lil Cal moving. Damn. Dirk's staring now a bit because he's never actually seen a bouquet in person before. They were more interesting to look at than he would have thought.)

[obeir]

[ The expressive theatrics of the puppet and Dirk's skill at controlling it has K smiling as he plays along, offering a hand now with the intent of sweeping Lil Cal into a dance. Well, a "dance" — something relatively simple that's meant to show off Dirk's puppeteering skills. K had first learnt to dance with his AI companion who's a holographic projection and lacks a physical body; he's accustomed to pantomiming in this manner.

A self-deprecating response comparing himself to a puppet is on the tip of his tongue, but he manages to refrain. He doesn't want to bring down the mood. ]

He's quite charming. [ His eyes are on Dirk as he says it, and his tone becomes teasing. ] You might have competition.

[ It's too bad this unexpected meeting has sort of ruined the surprise of his gift for Dirk, but hopefully he'll still be happy to receive it a bit later. ]

Did you make him?

[givehead]

(Lil Cal happily 'accepts' the hand. This results in Dirk flash-stepping much closer to K with greater frequency. That citrus scent carried with him each time as he whipped through the air. But then he stops flash stepping. He sits still and rests his hands in his lap. There are a few delicate, translucent golden strings between his fingers and Lil Cal. His fingers occasionally twitch, but otherwise, he's motionless.

Lil Cal is lifted into the air so that he could rest his hand on K's shoulder. The little guy was eager to replicate the dance that had been replaying in Dirk's mind over and over ever since it happened.

Dirk feels a bit of warmth spread in his chest when K decides to look at him when he says that. Oh, man. K was too much. Dirk smirks.)

That's some stiff competition. Look at those moves. (He moves Lil Cal's legs in an obnoxious frenzy of incoherent movements. It's enough to get a genuine laugh out of Dirk, a short sound that he instantly swallows up.

Listen, he really loves puppets and this might be the closest thing to genuine joy he gets from a hobby, okay! He only looks mildly embarrassed at having laughed like that from his own actions just now.

Thankfully for K, Dirk would never imagine anyone getting him gifts ever. He was completely oblivious to the possibility. Boy, wasn't he going to be shocked.)

Nah. When I crashed on earth, he was the only thing with me. I think my bro made him. I would never have survived without him. (There's...actual fondness in Dirk's voice. A softness that rarely showed itself.)

He's literally my best friend. He knows everything about me. I always talk to him. (...A beat later, Dirk seems to realize how that must sound. He clears his throat. Moves Lil Cal closer to K. The puppet was well-loved, obviously old, but it's evident that Dirk had made sure to keep him clean and patched up all these years.)

[obeir]

[ Dirk might be nigh on invisible when he's moving, but the familiar citrus scent gives away his proximity and causes an instant prickle of awareness along the back of K's neck. Which is followed by idle wonderings of whether it's a cologne, or hair products, maybe soap... Normally that's as far as it would go, but the unfortunate (for him) effects of February's influence on Coldblood makes his mind snag on the latter, soon wandering into thoughts of a shared bath and vague sense memories of hot steam, soapy water running in rivulets on slick skin, his hands reaching down with intent—

...

Apparently the competition isn't the only thing that's metaphorically stiff. There's a slight telltale flush high along his cheekbones, but despite the peculiar distraction, he doesn't miss a step of the dance. The nonsensical way Lil Cal's legs are moving gets an amused look that grows into a smile when Dirk laughs, the sound warming something in him. ]

So he's been your lifelong friend. [ It's said with understanding as he inspects the puppet a bit closer, and his already careful handling of it only becomes gentler after that revelation. It's clear the puppet holds considerable sentimental value... even if it does have an unnerving aesthetic. ]

What might it take for him to reveal some of your secrets? [ K's back to teasing as he leads the puppet around the sidewalk, momentarily dipping down to retrieve the larger of the two bouquets: predominantly featuring flowers in shades of yellow and orange, and elegantly tied with long, trailing ribbons and lace in an elaborate design, which the other bouquet notably lacks. This one is clearly meant to be a gift, while the other will find a home in a vase on K's kitchen table. He then leads Lil Cal with one hand closer to where Dirk is. ]

I'm glad I ran into you. I intended to come by your shop to give you this. [ And he smoothly comes to a stop, offering Dirk a theatrical bow of his own before presenting the bouquet to him. ]

this is ..so tender..

[givehead]

(It was a combination of all the above. Dirk was meticulous in keeping himself clean and was known among his friends to take the longest showers. It was a blessing that Dirk couldn't read minds right about now. Or maybe a curse.)

He'd never sell me out. We're bros. Ain't that right, buddy? (Lil Cal's jaw clacks open and shut in confirmation. Definitely an unsettling doll to look at. Dirk was the only person alive who thought otherwise. Dirk appreciates K's teasing though. It made him feel good. Especially after their last conversation. Since then, Dirk had been upholding his end. Knowing that being with K was even somewhat possible? Yeah, he had no problem dropping the flirty act.

Dirk watches as K picks up the flowers. It hasn't connected just yet.

Then it does.

Dirk stares with apparent impassivity at the flowers, his face carefully blank. But slowly, his cheeks begin to flush an obvious red. Lil Cal is dropped to the ground and snagged over to sit at Dirk's feet. Dirk's mind was, for the first time possibly ever, completely blank. One could practically see the metaphorical steam pouring out of his ears.

K was giving him flowers. A man was giving him flowers. Him. Flowers. A guy he liked was giving him flowers. Dirk didn't recognize the explosive feeling popping off in his chest primarily because no one has ever shown such a gesture to him before. He reaches out to take the flowers from K and simply holds them, staring down at them in mute awe. Holy shit.

K gave him flowers.

In three seconds flat, he might as well be sixteen again. He raises the flowers towards his face until he can feel the petals against his cheeks like he needs to confirm their reality. He winds up resting against the flowers, half out of embarrassment that he knew he was blushing, and half because he needed a goddamn moment. Holy fuck. K gave him flowers. It causes a more sharply defined emotion than Jake had ever managed and Dirk was reeling.

Flowers. Okay. Cool. Flowers. Yes. This was normal, right? He had seen movies. This is what romantic gestures were. Totally cool. He could deal. Only he can't deal because up until this moment, this reality had only ever existed in the abandoned parts of his heart that he had accepted as impossible years ago. Apparently, he was wrong. He just needed to start rewriting his own comprehension of how his new life worked.

Dirk realizes at last that he has been dead quiet for several minutes now. That he should probably say something normal like 'wow thanks, dude.' Or something. Instead, he's on his feet in a flash and quicker yet, he's moving forward and wrapping his arms around K's neck in a tight, abrupt hug. He presses his face against K's shoulder and just holds on tightly. He manages to keep the flowers in one hand, but he uses the other to press against K's back. His whole body winds up flush against K's in the process.

And because Sawtooth is an absolute unit of a wingman, Sawtooth thinks to switch the song to something a bit more appropriate for the scene. This only results in Dirk blushing a bit harder because, wow, bro, call him out much?)

Thank you. (Annnd nailed it. He finally got out some words.)

;; lmao best wingman

[obeir]

[ The silence would be more concerning if not for how obviously affected Dirk is by his gesture. Once he accepts the bouquet, K stands back with his hands loosely clasped in front of himself, watching with a soft expression while Dirk is processing everything.

Maybe they really aren't so different. Because he can recognise so much of his old self in the way Dirk doesn't seem to know what to do with himself, or how to react, and K knows without even having to ask that this is most likely the first time anyone has made this kind of effort for him. And he's glad it could be him.

What he couldn't predict is suddenly having an armful of Dirk. There's a soft huff of pleased laughter as K wraps his arms around him in turn, relishing the closeness. But more than that, he's just... acutely aware of Dirk, his smell, his warmth, and every point of contact between their bodies. His nerves are practically buzzing from stimulus overload. It's so hard to keep his thoughts from wandering again, but this is— it's important. He wants to stay present in the moment.

Feeling rather flustered now himself, the change of song isn't lost on him, either. He gently leans his head against Dirk's, and there's a smile in his voice. ] You're welcome. I wasn't sure if you were into flowers, but wanted it to be a surprise.

[ So he hadn't wanted to ask beforehand. It isn't a premade bouquet; he'd tried to choose flowers that he thought Dirk might like, and that he thought looked good together, aided by some advice from the florist. And this feels like a definite success, even if the gesture may be more appreciated than the gift itself. Giving no indication of wanting to pull away, he continues in a quieter tone: ] How are you feeling?

[givehead]

(Again, Dirk was oblivious to his impact on K right now. Though he had his own reaction to being this close to K yet again. He acutely remembers how nice it had been dancing with K. Their bodies fit well together. K felt comfortable the same way the ocean used to feel comfortable. Dirk didn't feel lonely standing here with K.)

I didn't know I was into them until right now. (It was definitely a surprise and he's pretty sure he doesn't need to clarify that.)

I can see why people like getting them. (They are beautiful. Maybe he was biased because the gesture felt so genuine, but no. They really are pretty and Dirk can appreciate the fascinating structure of petals, the delicate way they unfurled. The smells were rich and almost buttery; nothing at all like floral perfumes and lotions.

How was he feeling? His shoulders shake in a brief, silent chuckle.)

Giddy as fuck, honestly. I believe I am actually swooning. You're smooth as hell.

(He withdraws just enough to look at K. There's a smudge of pollen on his cheek. There's a keen yearning that starts to build up inside of Dirk, the desperate urge to kiss K at that very moment. It would be so easy. All he had to do was lean forward. He stays still, but admits:)

I want to kiss you right now. (Why deny it! Not that K asked! But so what!)

But I'm determining that if I kissed you right now, I probably wouldn't stop anytime soon. (He smiles slightly, mostly a shy look, or as shy as Dirk Strider could ever look anyway.)

How are you feeling?

[obeir]

[ It would be the easiest thing in the world to close the small distance between them and claim Dirk's mouth, and K would be lying if he said he doesn't want to do exactly that, but — they're taking things slow, as friends. Like they'd agreed on. And he knows it's for the best, especially when part of him is still hurt by how things ended at the Red and he worries about how easily Dirk could ghost him again if he messes up. He has to be more careful.

It's just too bad the feel of Dirk against him has his body disregarding the memo on taking things slow. And then there's suddenly more than a metaphorical stiffness to contend with. If Dirk has ever wondered how anatomically correct androids of K's type are, a... partial answer... sure is pressing into his thigh right now. And it's as much a surprise to K as it probably is to Dirk.

Maybe they can just. Ignore it.

His smile never wavers and he still looks pleased by Dirk's reaction to his gift, but embarrassment begins to colour his expression as well as he carefully backs off, discreetly adjusting himself in the process. Not too far, though. Enough so he isn't dry humping Dirk in public. He's still able to reach up and gently swipe at the smudge of pollen on Dirk's cheek with his thumb, and his hand lingers there for a moment. ]

Feeling similarly. [ As Dirk may have noticed. No, no point denying it. K's also feeling maybe more than a little mortified by the uncharacteristic betrayal of his body, but he's trying to keep it together. ] I'm glad you like them that much. [ He casts a curious look toward Lil Cal and Sawtooth. ] Was I interrupting your performance...?

i am so sorry k

[givehead]

(They were treading a fine line. Dirk still had his own insecurities with their situation. Dirk wanted to be just as careful. He was trying hard to stamp down his flirty bullshit. He wanted to prove himself to K. It's what K deserved. And, if they ever did get together, it would be what their relationship deserved.

Tragically for K, Dirk is a hyperaware person of his surroundings at all times like any good warrior would be. He feels that press of something, but he doesn't think it's...that. Which means he has absolutely no problem smirking at K, pressing up his glasses.)

Wow, K, I didn't think you missed me that much. (In Dirk's defense? He honestly figures it's K's Omni or something. So that meant teasing was on the table over a dick joke. Whoops!

He rocks on his heels as K wipes pollen off his face, and he wonders how messy he could get to see where else those hands might wander. Dirk doesn't even have the excuse of being a coldblood. He's just outrageously into this guy. There was something to be said about intentionally holding himself back too.

Knowing K wanted to kiss him back is almost as good as if they actually kissed.)

I wouldn't judge you if you laid one on me. (He held his flowers, turning them around to admire them further.)

Nah. I was just having a good time. (He looks over to the pair and makes a small gesture.) Ya'll can go home. I'll see you there later.

(Sawtooth gives a nod, picks up the puppet, and blasts off - literally. He flies off over the city and back towards Dirk's home. Now that they were alone, Dirk turns back around to K.)

So, you gonna walk me to my shop then? Since you were heading there already.

lol he deserves it

[obeir]

[ The feeling of mortification only grows and a flush of embarrassment is spreading down his neck by this point. So much for ignoring it. ]

I apologise for that. [ His utterly earnest tone might clue Dirk in on the fact it wasn't his Omni getting better acquainted with Dirk's thigh. K reaches up to rub the back of his neck, watching Sawtooth take the puppet and leave with a little pang of regret; he definitely hadn't meant for them to leave. Because: ] You could've introduced us.

[ He's still incredibly curious about the robot guardians.

But now some humour returns to his voice as he glances at Dirk with raised eyebrows. ] Or is it too soon to meet the parents?

[ Never mind that Dirk said he sees the robots as more like brothers. It's a good joke, okay. Sort of. K pulls his backpack on and collects the other bouquet before offering an arm to Dirk so they can walk together. ] Wanting to get back to work?

dirk's v into it

[givehead]

(Dirk opens his mouth to tell K that it was fine but then he picks up on that tone. And the blushing. And holy shit. No. No way.)

I didn't even do anything. (Except there's a smirk spreading across his face. He can't help but to feel insanely flattered. Was that just from the hug? Dirk can't even bother to hide the smug look on his face. He reaches out a hand and unnecessarily adjusts some of K's clothes before sliding his hand down the front of his chest.)

Mmm. Sawtooth isn't much of a conversationalist. He's programmed to aggressively rap. Plus Squarewave would be jealous if I introduced ya'll without him here. You should come over to my place sometime so you can meet everyone.

(And to just be with Dirk somewhere private, but Dirk's sure that benefit goes without saying.)

They already know I'm stupid crazy about you. (He sighs dramatically, gladly taking K's arm. How fucking cute was this guy? He moves his hand so that he could rest it on K's bicep and walk close.)

Less of a desire to work, and more of a desire to see you standing next to a bunch of sex toys. (He's just being a smartass here, but it would be a nice sight.)

Seriously. Thank you for the flowers. I was wondering what those were for.

[obeir]

[ Despite feeling cold to others, K can keenly feel heat in the wake of Dirk's touch, blooming across his skin much in the same same way his blush is. If he thought his nerves were buzzing before, it's nothing compared to what that deliberate touch elicits. He can't help leaning into it as though he's touch-starved; the strange desperation he feels is arguably even more embarrassing than the rest. Have the powers that be in Trench decided it's android mating season, or what?

At least the extra bouquet is convenient. He carries it low in front of himself for reasons that don't require explanation. ]

I'd enjoy that. [ Both to meet the robots and for the implied privacy that he's scrupulously not jumping to any conclusions about. And just getting to see more of Dirk's living space in general and getting a feel for his tastes. Ideas for future gifts, of course; there's no way there won't be more after the reaction this one received. At the mention of sex toys, he gives Dirk a speculative look. ]

Ult Dirk wanted my opinion on some of the wearable items at your shop. He wanted to send pictures. Modeling them, presumably.

[ Had it been born of this Dirk's desire to do the same, he wonders. ]

[givehead]

I'd offer to cook you dinner, but honestly, you don't want to eat anything I make.

(He had survived off the bare minimum for most of his life and had absolutely no skill or interest when it came to cooking.)

So I'll extend the offer to let you use my kitchen if you want.

(It could be a date, he thinks but doesn't say so out loud. He was just as wary as K was, even if for different reasons. It was a delicate situation - maybe more so because the connection was so strong. Having a basic crush on someone was as easy as accepting that it wasn't going to happen and moving on. But feeling like you found someone special? Not as easy to let go of.

He watches K out of the corner of his eye as they walk. He wants to groan when Ult Dirk is mentioned because goddamnit.)

Figures he'd do some shit like that. (Granted, Dirk loved the idea of sending K some raunchy pictures, but preferably on his terms.)

Did he send you any? (...And more importantly...) If yes, did you have a good experience?

[obeir]

[ He thinks it's sweet that Dirk would think to offer even if his cooking skills may be lacking. It provides K a smooth opening to turn it into more of a proper dinner date, which of course he's going to take. ]

I could cook for you. I've had enough practise I'd like to say I'm good at it. [ Perhaps ironically, considering his own limited needs when it comes to these things; far fewer than a human. He'd taken an interest in improving his cooking skills mainly for the sake of feeding others. It should serve him well now, he hopes. ] But you can be the judge. What are some meals you like?

[ With ingredients that might also be available in Trench, preferably. But he wouldn't mind finding out more about Dirk's preferences in general, either. ]

I'll admit I may have been curious... [ Might as well be honest. ] But he didn't know that. He didn't send any. And was relatively polite about it. Said something about not being into the non-con scene. [ Look, that counts as polite to K, especially compared to the treatment he receives in his home universe. He's smiling as he glances at Dirk. "A good experience." That's certainly a choice of words. ] Are you disappointed he didn't send them?

[givehead]

(He mulls over the question, just a slight frown on his face, but not out of upset so much as concentration. His relationship with food had been on a strict survival basis. Even when things had settled down, he wound up eating whatever was most convienant. He did the same here as well, so after a moment, he gives K an awkward shrug.)

Gonna be real with you, bro, I have no fuckin' clue. I ate to survive back in my world. Fish on sticks kinda deal. There's a lot about modern society that I'm not up to speed on and legit cuisine is one of them. (A beat.) I do love orange soda though. That shit was easy to find.

(Dirk that's not a meal, honey.)

Why don't you cook me a meal you like? (It would be nice to get to know K that way too. See what his tastes were. If things went well and they kept eating proper meals together, Dirk might be able to piece together a favorite meal.

Thank fuck. Dirk sighs quietly, relieved that Ult Dirk hadn't been that type of asshole anyway.)

Okay, good. (He snorts.) Yeah, I don't think any iteration of me is. (There was control and then there was acting monstrously.)

Aw, hell no. I would probably just get irrationally jealous of myself which is every kind of stupid. (When they arrive at the shop, Dirk steps ahead to hold the door for K.)

Plus, it would be more fun to model stuff in person, right?

[obeir]

[ ... Orange soda.

Would Trench even have something like that? Well, his old Deerington pub did appear here with him, including its full inventory, so he might be able to mix an approximation. He'll have to investigate later. The rest, though — that'll be easy enough, making a meal that he likes. ]

Sure, I can do that. I'll be your personal introduction to actual cuisine. [ A beat. ] Wouldn't the soda have been hundreds of years old by then?

[ Even though it's Dirk's own shop, K had been prepared to be the one doing the door holding. Having it held for him is met with mild surprise and a quietly pleased: ] Thank you.

[ And then he steps inside, taking everything in with a look of open curiosity. The future he's from is rather sexually liberated and adverts predominantly feature sexual imagery, so he's inured to these sorts of things through that exposure. Which just means he isn't immediately scandalised by what he can see of the shop's stock, so far. What does surprise him, though, is Dirk's — suggestion? ]

Are you stealing your other iteration's idea? [ He sounds amused. ]

[givehead]

I look forward to it. (He really did. Food always looked so good in anime and other films. If he took the reigns, he would have no clue where to begin. The question makes him huff a bit, amused.) Yeah, probably. That or the trolls brought it with them during their invasion. Those fuckers loved soda. All I know was that it was pretty easy to find.

(And he wouldn't know the difference between fresh and stale for the life of him.

He picks up on that tone and makes a few mental notes to pull out the gentlemanly stops for K. God knows he wanted to anyway.

Once inside, he slips his hands into his pockets and lingers close by, watching K check out his shop. He's glad to see that K isn't uncomfortable in the setting. Dirk wanders over to the main sales counter. Sitting behind it was Dirk's fill-in for whenever he wasn't around. It was an exact robot replica of Dirk - only somewhat younger-looking, somewhat smaller. Brobot only really acknowledges their presence with a greeting bob of his head. Brobot was never made for sentience but rather basic responses to stimuli in its immediate environment.

The question gets Dirk to smirk at K, shrugging.)

Shit. I've got great ideas. Can't deny that. I'm sure he won't mind. (If Ult Dirk wasn't here to reap the rewards then Dirk might as well.)

Besides, it'd be a fuckin' crime if I didn't try to follow up on that little moment between us just now. (He gives K a pointed look because no, buddy, he hasn't forgotten about the fact that he had somehow managed to illicit a physical response from K. How could he ever?)

[obeir]

[ Upon noticing the robot replica of Dirk, K's first instinct is to make a beeline for him and investigate — until his flush of embarrassment is renewed by the teasing. Yeah, he knows he won't be living that down anytime soon. He makes a detour to wander down an aisle instead under the pretense of browsing, hoping to regain some of his composure first. ]

That doesn't usually happen... [ Well. ] Not like that, I mean. From a hug.

[ Because it doesn't usually happen outside of very specific, controlled conditions where it's meant to happen. He has never functioned like a human in that regard; accidental erections just aren't a thing. Except, apparently, for when they are...? And it isn't that he's experiencing nebulous arousal that could be triggered by anyone or anything, it seemed like a response specific to Dirk, as far as he can tell.

At least Dirk doesn't appear uncomfortable... quite the opposite. But K remains perturbed by the whole ordeal. As he wanders back closer to the sales counter, he nods toward the robot version of Dirk. ]

Is that one of the robots you've made? [ Probably a safer topic. ]

[givehead]

(There is the fact that it happens at all. There's a question rolling around on the tip of his tongue but he's not sure if it's appropriate to even ask. He lets K wander. He doesn't follow him. Instead, he arranges the flowers on his counter. He was going to have to get a vase.

He slides up onto the counter, sitting on it by the time K wanders back towards them. He pulls a leg up so he could rest his elbow against his knee.)

So. You're a fully equipped android then. (A light observation instead of a question.) Felt like you're really packing.

(The ghost of a question. He leans onto his hand and glances at Brobot. He gives a silent nod. The machine walks smoothly out from behind the counter and goes to stand before K.)

Yes. Brobot. He's meant to help train people how to fight, but he's on novice mode. (...Which, actually...) Wait.

(Nope, too late. Brobot reaches out and just...slides a hand up K's abdomen in a decidedly flirtatious way.)

Brobot - go offline. (The red light of Brobot's shades dims and the robot shuts down.)

Sorry. I made him when I was a horny teenager. (As if he wouldn't make him the same exact way now.)

[obeir]

[ K's emotions are still strangely heightened, but at least he feels more in control of the physical side of things now. Enough that Dirk's comments are met with a sort of embarrassed amusement rather than complete mortification. ]

You noticed.

[ Maybe it was just intended as flirtation. It can be hard to tell with Dirk. But K's well acquainted with exactly what he's packing, and how unusual it seems for an android designed strictly for combat and law enforcement to be thus endowed beyond any human average. He isn't a pleasure model. It served no purpose. Except: ] I have my suspicions my handler had me designed with the intent of using me for more than law enforcement.

[ Suspicions that were more or less confirmed when she came to his apartment and propositioned him. It certainly wasn't the first time he'd noticed her — interest. It was just the most blatant instance of it. All she'd have had to do is issue him orders and he would've been forced to obey, no matter what those orders were...

Fortunately(?) he's distracted from those distressing thoughts by Brobot unexpectedly sliding a hand up his body. It's startling enough that at first he isn't sure what to do, but thankfully Dirk acts before K has to. Okay. Not a safer topic. Seems like they may end up talking about sex with robots either way.

His eyes move between the now offline Brobot and Dirk, eyebrows slowly raising. He can appreciate the layers of ironies here. If that's even the word for it. ]

And what does novice mode entail? [ After some initial hesitation, he reaches up to touch Brobot's face. Just his fingertips at first, in a light, cursory sort of examination, but then he presses his hand more fully against the robot's face, curious to feel what he's made of. ]

[givehead]

Hard not to. No pun intended.

(There was no judgment though. He can figure out why it might be unusual for an android to have such a technically "useless" part added onto their body. It's a fine line between something to joke about, and something very real that K had to live with, and Dirk's aware enough of that to respect it.)

But you have been able to enjoy it for your own purposes and interests, right?

(After their little conversation about how K used to dom the hell out of his boyfriend...Yeah. Still. It would be good to know that K was fully in charge of that part of his body rather than it being programmed to react a specific way. He didn't want to make baseless assumptions.)

Novice means that the combat is...for a novice. It's gentler. (Emphasis on the gentle. He adjusts his glasses, and admits rather awkwardly:) I built him for Jake. I had this whole idea in my head about trying to get to Jake a thousand years ago in the past or whatever. Til then I sent him bits and pieces of this guy in the meantime.

(There was some layers of something all right. Dirk watches K touch the robot's face, and it felt like K might as well be touching a part of his soul. It feels like intrusion of a private, intimate moment, and he winds up looking down at his shoes. The metal was smooth and nearly flawless except for the few dips in the metal where pieces had been carefully soldered together. Dirk had done well in replicating his own face (granted, a bit younger).)

I like to think I didn't intend for novice mode to be somewhat erotic, but honestly, I'm sure I did it while convincing myself it wasn't for any reason in particular. I dunno.

(He wondered faintly if that made him every bit as weird and deplorable as the people who made K. Then again, Brobot wasn't exactly a sentient being either. An intelligent robot, by far, but self-aware and reflective? No.)

[obeir]

Yes. I can't deny that this capability has been surprisingly beneficial for me. [ Being able to engage in a sexual relationship with someone he loves had never actually been about the sex, for him — or not just sex — it had been another way of expressing his feelings. Whether it was the sort of languid and tender lovemaking that could last for hours, or rough fucking on every surface of their home, it had always been a deeply emotional act for K. It's partly why he struggles with understanding how, for most people, sex can be an act completely devoid of emotion or affection but still satisfying for them.

He gives a thoughtful hum while continuing to examine Brobot. Just as he'd been with Lil Cal, he's particularly careful in his treatment of Dirk's belongings. ] That topic I said to put a pin in before. This all relates to that.

[ About casual sex and why he's never felt it would be fulfilling for him. He glances back to Dirk, wondering if maybe now is the right time to start getting into it. As Dirk goes on to explain the history behind this robot that was made in his image, K can't help smiling. ]

That sounds pretty romantic. You made an entire robotic version of yourself for him. [ ...Possibly to seduce him in Dirk's place? But he's going to keep that thought to himself.

The lack of sentience is the saving grace here, really. Because he would have a decidedly different reaction to Dirk creating something fully sentient, with a mind and a will of its own, and then treating it like a tool to be used. As K and his kind are. ]

You wanted him to be able to protect himself? [ He guesses. ] Was this before you realised you had feelings for him? If you don't mind me asking.

[givehead]

(Despite his overzealous attitude towards sex, Dirk really hadn't been living up the life of a slut since arriving in Trench. Nor before. He had only had sex about six times in his life altogether between two guys. He figured removing emotions from the equation would make his life easier. In some ways, he's pretty sure that was true. This tango with K was more fragile than whatever it was he had had with Savage. It would have been easier if he merely lusted after K. K would have said he wasn't interested in casual sex and Dirk would have moved on with his life.

Instead, he got a crush. Like an idiot. He can't even imagine what sex would be like with someone he was in love with who loved him back just as much. Mostly because Dirk couldn't imagine anyone being in love with him like that. Even with K, Dirk had silently started to convince himself that he was never going to meet TB's level in K's heart.)

Oh? (It's a gentle press. One that told K he was willing to listen if K was ready, but also one that suggested he wouldn't hound K for it either.

It...is something to be told that Brobot was a romantic gesture. Dirk frowns slightly, but not at K. Just at memories.)

You're the only person who thinks so. (He mumbles this.) Other people thought it was a weird narcissistic power move that was super aggressive.

(So. He's glad to know K didn't think that.

Dirk did plenty of shitty things throughout his various timelines, but he can at least honestly say he wouldn't do that to an AI. Granted, he hadn't treated Lil Hal all the great, but that situation was a lot different.)

He liked fighting and wanted a sparring buddy. (So Dirk built him on.) I don't mind. (But it is a bit awkward. Talking about being a pathetic teen always was. Dirk leans back against his counter, resting his elbows there.)

I had a crush on him for years. He was the only guy I ever knew and I guess I hyperfocused on that. I always was sending him shit every goddamn day all day long. I just wanted his attention. Then I started making that sucker when I got more confident in my ability to warp shit through space and time.

(And it worked. He shrugs.)

I've chilled out since then. (He thinks to say, frowning at K, curling a hand absently into a fist.) I won't like. Be up your ass all the time. (Even though he really wanted to. He was trying very hard to remember his past mistakes.)

[obeir]

[ And maybe it isn't a good time to subject Dirk to even more rambling about his views on sex... Because damn. That's rough. His smile promptly fades upon hearing how other people had reacted to the robot gift. That seems like an unusually cruel opinion, but he realises he might also be missing a lot of context. ]

I'm sorry they made you feel bad about it.

[ What Dirk describes and then the assurance about not being that way with him has K reflecting on his own recent actions, and growing worried he's already pushing Dirk's boundaries and coming on way too strong. ]

I reached out to you first after... the Red. I was coming here to give you the flowers. [ Then there's how he'd managed to humiliate himself when Dirk hugged him, something he's beginning to feel a creeping sense of shame for. Feeling inordinately self-conscious, he awkwardly looks away, studying Brobot instead. ]

If anything, I'm the one who needs to chill out, I guess. [ It's self-deprecating more than anything. ] ...Did Jake at least appreciate the gesture? Or he also thought it was too aggressive?