A New Challenger Appears! ( CLOSED )

[bardbarous]

Who: Tachome Dhaume bardbarous and Anakin Skywalker facultative
What: Tuck vs Anakin
When: Late December
Where: Cassandra District outside Anakin's house

Content Warnings: Two idiots fighting??


[ Everyone can hear Tuck before they spot the seven foot monster dressed in nothing more than a loincloth and an axe strapped to his back. He's been wandering the district for ten minutes looking for the right house. Too stubborn and embarrassed to ask, he has no clue what the hell a starfighter is, so all he can do is shout from the street until he finds the right adversary. ]

Cassandra! Cassandra! I know you're here! Come out! I don't care if you're a woman. I will fuck you up.

[ No, he won't. He will see her and drool all over himself. ]


(( ooc: This is literally what's happening right now. ))

Comments

nuh uh!!

[bardbarous]

[ A new challenger appears! Tuck turns around to face him, eyes narrowing as they dart around the front yard. ]

That's a ship?! Looks like a crab...

yuh huh!!!

[facultative]

[Anakin looks at the ship and then back at Tuck.]

You've never seen a crab before, have you?

um NO

[bardbarous]

I have seen a fucking crab before! In fact, I've fought crabs before. Crabs the size of your stupid little starfighter. Whatever that is!

[ The crab was not actually that big. Very aggressive, though! Tuck stalks over to the starfighter, mimicking a high-pitched whiny voice. ]

Ooo, I think I'm soo cool 'cause I have a hunk of metal in my yard! [ And in Tuck fashion, he begins waving his junk at it. ] I'm a little biiitch who yells at people in the night like a fucking animal!

YES

[facultative]

[...is he insulting himself? Anakin isn't the one shouting at everyone in the neighbourhood here.

At a normal level with no yelling:]

You're the one yelling. [Also showing off his junk which Anakin really did not need to see.]

nope

[bardbarous]

[ Why is logic even entering your mind here, Anakin? There is nothing logical about this seven foot man air humping at your starfighter in a loincloth. ]

Well maybe you're making me yell when you called me a nerd! Hey! Everyone!! This is his fault! He was slandering me!

[ "Both of you! Take it inside! Leave us in peace!" ]

yep!

[facultative]

Shut up, nerd.

[He finally said it. Will this crazy guy be happy now? Unlikely.]

now you've done it (also lmk if this is ok)

[bardbarous]

[ All right. Time to take off the kiddy gloves. Standing in front of the "butt" of the starfighter, Tuck squats down under the tail exhaust and tries lifting it. He's determined to turn this fucker over!

And before you dismiss this futile attempt, Anakin, you can hear the thing starting to creek under Tuck's inhuman strength. The bastard might just be able to do it! ]

it's okay because he'll still fuck with him

[facultative]

[The thing about people who can lift things with their mind is that they can also do the opposite. Metal creaks and shifts as Tuck gets his grip and then it seems to stop as Anakin uses the Force to push it down at the same time.

No one is around to tell him off for this and Artoo isn't going to rat him out.]