deercountry | I ROSE UP FROM THE DEAD (I DO IT ALL THE TIME)

Entry tags:

I ROSE UP FROM THE DEAD (I DO IT ALL THE TIME)

Who: Chara + Others
What: Chara comes back to life and mopes, then decides to do mad science before being pulled into two different secondary locations. (March catch-all with closed and open prompts.)
When: All across march.
Where: All across Trench.

Content Warnings: References to child death, suicidal ideation, depression, misanthropy, child soldiers.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[sudden would be a good word for it. one minute, Lexi was sitting in a class going over the various locations and what distinguished one from the other, an essential class if Lexi didn't want to constantly be asking for directions.

then the other person sitting in at the desk next to hers draws Lexi's attention. she would have sworn that they weren't there when Lexi took her seat, but maybe she's seeing things. she wouldn't be surprised by hallucinations. since she's still unconvinced that all of this wasn't an elaborate dream.

but they're not bothering her. they're even more intent on taking notes than Lexi herself was. though, she had to wonder at the wisdom of this place taking someone who seemed even younger than she was.

she'd been stealing glances at them in between notes which looked like a wall of text, but made perfect sense to her, when the other person suddenly turned to face Lexi.

she wished she didn't look as awkward and embarrassed as she felt, worrying she'd offended the other scholar by her sneaky glances]

...oh! Um. No. I've only been here a week. Is that a prerequisite to taking classes here? Should I do that?

No, I believe if he didn't want you here, you wouldn't be here. Have you read about him? He runs the academy.

[It feels like such a....... degrading position for a Pthumerian Patron to give themselves. But they're not judging. Clearly he thinks there's some value in teaching the populace, and in accepting just about anybody.

He's probably right, though Chara is as ever suspicious of his motives.]

You're Lexi, yes? [She never gave them her name.]

That's both kind of scary and reassuring at the same time. And I have a little bit. I've been here less than a week and I'm by myself, so I'm kind of. Uncertain?

[which would be the understatement of the year. she's never been entirely by herself, there was her mom and Cassie. and occasionally Rue. she's still in the jumping at shadows stage.

she's a little afraid of approaching Never Mind because that would mean that all of this was real and not some elaborate dream]

Yeah. That's me. [a little self-deprecating laugh] What's your name?

I think being scared and reassured is the proper response. The Pthumerians are... unsettling, with the amount of power they have over us.

[Chara doesn't actually hate them though. They're just little guys. Mother Mercy however......]

Chara. It's a pleasure to meet you. Are you studying here to try and find your footing?

[Lexi breathes a sigh of relief] Good. I'm not the weird one. This time, at least. [a pause] Is Never Mind...I hate to use the word "nice," but um, maybe not terrifying would be better?

[as soon as Lexi was old enough to make her own decisions, she told her father to stop taking her to church. her mother was Jewish, she wanted to know if Lexi would rather go to her synagogue. she didn't want that, either.

so at the age of eight, Lexi became an atheist. but this place is pushing it]

You, too. [and she feels herself blush] Yeah, pretty much. I figure I'll eventually wind up being here as an arcane scholar, but I want to make sure I'm properly informed first, you know?

[Chara seems amused by the question. There's a sort of naive quality to it that they can distantly appreciate.]

They're all terrifying lovecraftian horror gods. Even the nicest ones. Never Mind claims to know everything and thinks everyone should know as much as possible too. He seems more useful than the majority of them though.

That's what I know about him based on second hand experiences anyway.

[that was probably how her friends back home would describe her. naïve, at least in comparison to the rest of them]

I've, um. I've read Lovecraft. Had nightmares for a week. [a pause]
Does someone have to be really brave or really cool or really strong? 'Cause I'm pretty sure I'm not any of those.

You've never spoken to him yourself?

If it helps you feel better about Lovecraft, all of it was him projecting his own xenophobia on unknowable space gods. In reality he was just a terrified sheltered racist.

[They tend to discard the author's motives as much as possible when reading something, though. They just have a unique sort of sympathy of being something dreaded by virtue of existing.]

I don't think so. The strongest people here are also some of the weakest emotionally, you can break them with words. The bravest people here are the dumbest, and they'll jump into the jaws of death at the earliest opportunity. I don't have anything poetic to say about cool people but by and large they're pretty useless.

That was why I asked, yes.

[she wrinkles up her nose at the notion that Lovecraft was a racist]

Seriously? Ugh! They sure didn't cover that in my sci-fi/fantasy class. Are all of the good writers some variety of asshole or another? Don't worry about spoilers.

[the latter comment was an attempt at humor. but she suspects that "yes, they were assholes" is likely the correct assessment. and she still wants to go for an English Lit major.

and she looks completely surprised]...really? Well, that's good to know. I'm not as scary as [Maddy or Rue] some people but I like to think I can hold my own.

And that makes sense. I've seen all of the MCU movies and kept thinking that if those dumbasses would actually talk to each other, their problems would be solved in about five minutes. At least those had actors and screenwriters to blame.

Though that's good, because cool is pretty fucking useless in the grand scheme of things. [thank you, Rue]

Oh. Well, I'm still about as new as it gets? [her voice gets a bit higher with the end to every question] So maybe there's a take-a-number spot somewhere?

[They assume it's a rhetorical question, so they don't give an answer because yes, in their mind just about every person in the world is a some variety of asshole.]

Holding your own is the important part, not coming off a certain way. There's many ways to survive. A lot more than people assume there is.

I think he's pretty open to visitors if you can get a hold of him. He's hardly my patron, but I do wish to speak to him.

[she's been disappointed by the personal takes of writers before. but she knows that refusing to let anyone read that work in its original form was a disservice to both the author and their public]

Really? Like what kinds of ways to survive? I've never been on my own before, there was always my mom or my sister there with me.

Hmm. Then I might have to set up a meeting. I would like to know more, about this place and about him. And he's not my patron, either, Dorothea is. She's the--the jackalope, right?

[Chara looks at her, an unreadable expression on their face.]

You're quite fortunate, then. [It's an observation. Any bitterness they might feel in the depths of their heart is between them and the allknowing Pthumerian.] Wits, primarily. Keep smart, stay out of trouble when possible, but don't shy away from it when there's no other choice. Make powerful allies. That sort of thing. A healthy dose of DETERMINATION helps as well.

You're in luck. Dorothea is a patron for survival by any means. But specifically the Patron Pthumerian of Manipulation. Mine is Remina.

[Lexi just hopes that she doesn't look as lost as she feels]

Yeah? I've...always been the level-headed one in my family. [which was true. Cassie was acting just plain weird, her mom always had a glass of wine within reach, and her dad. was her dad. the less she thought about him, the better] Though, I guess now's the time to admit that I've never really. Been in trouble before. Not even a fistfight in grade school. But, the rest...the rest I can do. [she hopes]

Manipulation? Like of people or circumstances or both? [and she could feel herself blush] I don't really know Remina.

Well, let's hope you're a fast learner. [Asriel wasn't, and it got him killed. But he learned, after death. That's something. It's probably a bit jarring for a child of about eleven or twelve to clearly radiate the energy of having to fight for their own survival for more-or-less their entire life, but that instinct to survive and grow stronger and wiser is more or less their entire purpose for existing.]

Both, I'd imagine, though they're one and the same largely. You can manipulate your circumstances by manipulating the people who believe in your circumstances. It's like a magic trick.

Remina is the Patron Pthumerian of History, and deals deeply with the concept of time and eternity.

I usually am. I'm in all of the AP and college prep classes back home, even though I'm a junior. I'd like to graduate early if I can. [it is a little jarring. they were intense and not in any way Lexi had experienced before. especially not from someone so young]

That sounds kinda hard? I've never really...manipulated anyone or anything before. I know there's, you know, the kinds of manipulation you can do with guys you like, but I've never really liked anyone enough to try it. [she imagines that Fez would either see right through it or not even notice and Rue would be even worse]

Oh. That's pretty cool, actually. Are those subjects you're interested in?

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

I ROSE UP FROM THE DEAD (I DO IT ALL THE TIME)

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

(CW: alcoholism)

no subject

no subject