Xerxes Break (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
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deercountry2022-04-16 10:48 pm
payingfordeliverance) wrote in deercountry2022-04-16 10:48 pm
004: We need to feel breathless with love, and not collapsed under its weight
Who: Xerxes Break + Established CR
What: The "ideal future" arch from the test drive: Blessed Are the Curious
When: Early April
Where: Break's backyard, except for the part where it isn't, because we're on the other side of the arch
Content Warnings: Everyone exists in a dreamscape that gives them altered memories. It is great so leaving it will be very sad.
Cast of Characters
"I don't want to die. I want to still be here."
Break's ideal future is not complicated at all. Not even a little bit. He has a great many people he loves, many of whom he misses desperately, and he wants them all in the same spot and he wants them thriving. Not even necessarily happy all the time, but fulfilled. Healing,, if that's what it takes. To that end, the illusion crafted by his whims is essentially a peaceful version of his new life in Trench with a whole lot of people from home added in. Anyone who interacts with him in this dream will find themselves influenced by -- and possibly entirely under the sway of -- his notion of what a wonderful future would look like for them. And, existing in this dream comes with an innate knowledge of certain people they have never met, all of whom can even be interacted with, though they reflect Break's ideas of them, too.
The Rainsworths: All three of them are here, of course. These women are Break's precious family, the ones who gave him his second chance and made him the person he is. Sheryl Rainsworth, the matriarch of the family, is a gentle noblewoman of around seventy years old, always well dressed and impeccably put together, damn near impossible to rattle. Bound to a wheelchair at home, she remains unable to walk in Trench -- possibly. We think. It is possible she could walk if she felt like it, but as a darkblood, she has a nice new chair that she floats around in at her leisure instead of waiting patiently to be pushed. She may simply prefer it, given the way she is so often heard chortling to herself and calling out mild warnings as she comes close to buzzing people in passing. Any and all chaos and shenanigans occurring around her are met with "Hohoho. My, that's interesting, isn't it?" Shelly Rainsworth, her daughter, is a lively woman in her mid-thirties -- having had extremely poor health at home that took her away from her family at a fairly young age, in Trench she is energetic and vivacious, and is storming through her new life with no trouble. It's common knowledge that she is Break's previous lover, and he's still utterly devoted to her. After all, the serene greediness of her personality is the primary thing that saved him from his own rock bottom, long ago. She has apparently taken Break's relationship with Qrow to mean that Qrow's butt is also hers to pat lovingly in passing, but outside of menacing the both of them with relentless flirting, she is content to leave them to it and go make friends ("friends") elsewhere without the boundaries of proper society and her health to dictate her shenanigans. Lastly, Sharon Rainsworth, who some know as the girl Break considers to be his daughter. She still calls him Brother Xerx when she's feeling especially affectionate and he still feels no need to correct her -- and, more importantly, having grown up something of a lonely and isolated child, any and everyone Break has a solid relationship with in Trench also belongs to her now. Ruby, Yang, Ange, White Alice, Lysithea -- congratulations, you are all her sisters. Most importantly, it is known that Sharon arrived in Trench still trapped in the body of a thirteen year old girl, despite being twenty-three. In Break's ideal future, the magic that caused this is lifted and Sharon has grown up at last, a carbon copy of her mother able to go out into Trench and mingle as she likes.
It is painfully obvious that the reason Break gets away with so much shit is that the Rainsworths think his nonsense is hilarious.
Reim Lunettes Break's best friend, a twenty-six year old nerd with the cantankerous soul of an eighty year old man. Reim arrived in the house and immediately started running it, for lack of anything better to do, because he is the sort of person who could scold a hurricane until it turned itself into a wee rainstorm to politely water his garden. (Xerxes Break is a lost cause.) Many of his interactions with Break come across as Reim relentlessly bitching at him, with Break basking in the attention and often deliberately making it worse. But they're also endlessly devoted to one another -- because this is Break's ideal future, Reim has never been in enough danger in Trench to send him on a murderous rampage, but it is known that he has done so in the past -- and Break getting into trouble always results in Reim seeing to it that whatever he needs happens immediately and with great efficiency. If anything, living together in Trench after Break's death has brought them even closer, as it's mellowed Break out enough to show his appreciation of Reim more openly. An amiable and helpful person, Reim is happy to help out whoever else comes to him with a problem too, his nerves and stammering and anxious glasses-cleaning habit hiding a sturdy and reliable personality.
He's Break's handler, is what we're getting at. He can often be found in a trio with Break and Sharon, the Rainsworth bubble back together again.
Gilbert Nightray: Qrow had Ozpin. Gilbert had Break. Qrow arguably got the better deal, honestly. A young man in his mid-twenties who has only one arm these days, Gil is the third member of the Oz-Black Alice-Gil trifecta, and is most often chasing one or both of them around. Having learned to cook out of concern for Break years previous, he is also often found in the kitchen, where he and his old mentor have settled into a bitchy sort of teamwork together that works primarily because they each have their own specialties. He comes with a giant skull-headed Raven that spits blue fire, and meets most idiotic Trench shenanigans by pointing accusingly and screaming at them. The awareness of Gil in this dream is a little hazy, a reflection of one of Break's strongest regrets in Trench -- that Gil only realized who he was and grew up right at the very end, such that Break didn't have much time to get to know him. But he's here, because Oz and Alice need him, and whenever Break feels the need to go out and kill a beast for some reason Gil is inevitably at his side. Every now and again he's riled enough to overcome his own fumbling and make friendship speeches at people, and what he says he'll do, he does.
Elliot Nightray: The boy was here for a few months in the very beginning of Break's time in Trench, and the version of him that appears in the dream is a little taller, moves a little more easily, dresses a little more casually. He'd only just gotten started that first time around, and Break was seeing the barest beginnings of a war stirring within him then, as obligation drove him to the Hunters and love drove him to his piano. Here in Break's "ideal", Elliot has chosen the latter, and works as a musician for one of the local Sleeper clubs. The other residents of Haven won't ever replace the family he lost, but they've given him a new one to fuss over, and in that sense he sort of serves as Break's right-hand man. It was Elliot, after all, who was clear-eyed enough even in the midst of his own grief to realize that Oz needed a lot of looking after and the Alices were in want of people to guide them to becoming people themselves.
Oscar Vessalius The Duke of Vessalius and Oz's beloved uncle, a wild and rambunctious fountain of positivity and love. Oscar is the one who taught everyone else the philosophy of the Unbirthday -- the active choice to celebrate the every day beauty of the mundane, and to treasure being with your loved ones in a conscious way. Break has him here both because he adores Oscar and has for years, and because "what would Lord Oscar do" has been his question to himself whenever he needs to cheer up a kid in particular. Oscar has met Trench's everything with unyielding light, routinely throws parties at it, and is known for dragging anyone who looks too sad -- or corrupt -- into insane shenanigans that may or may not involve sneaking into random places in disguise. His wife and child are around too, unseen, because separating them again would just be too cruel. Let him wax poetic at you about his Lovely Wife Sarah, a commoner he met while out mingling and masquerading as not-a-duke, fell for, married despite the scandal, and has been devoted to all his life. Yes, he even has that kind of love story. He's what Break tries to be, and Break isn't nearly so successful at it.
Bonus RWBYs: Where there is Break, there is Qrow, and Qrow's ideal has the rest of his family returned to him -- Yang, the niece he's actually related to by blood, Ruby's half-sister; Raven, his own twin, reconciled; Clover, the amiable ex who has finally settled in to really creating a life for himself now that he won't simply be ripped back to whatever does or doesn't await him in Remnant's afterlife; Tai, because the girls need their dad, and of course, his Shelly, the notorious Summer Rose. Given that Break doesn't know any of these people himself, the actual details on them are vague in the dream unless Qrow himself is also around to influence it. But one thing's for sure: Summer and Shelly are besties who routinely and lovingly terrorize everyone together, and they've drawn damn near everyone who could possibly be relevant into frequent mother-daughter activities ranging from shopping trips to club nights to tea parties.
Ange's Family™ is also around, probably. There are no details on this whatsoever because the only concrete facts he has here other than "they're dead" are "there's this one aunt we really don't like" and "the brother ran off with some asshole", and quite frankly Break is not touching that. Whoever's around, Ange is happy about it. We do not need to think about it any harder than that.
Prompts
A Very Merry Unbirthday
This is probably not the moment to be thinking about this, but...once we're back, I would like to hold another tea party.
So said Oz Vessalius as they all roamed the streets of Sablier together, on their way to try and save the world. That moment had been pivotal for Break, who had been stunned to find himself happy to be there with them in spite of everything. It was a side effect of the way Oz had punched a crack in his armor all the way back at the theater, allowing the lot of them to worm their way properly into his heart, and as the others planned their party all around him he simply couldn't deny it anymore. He'd known, then, that he was never going to see such a party, and that Oz himself was probably well aware it was the last time they'd be together like so. But the boy's capacity to hope in such a way all the same had kept Break going long after his last fight ought to have killed him, and let him die with hope in his own heart in turn where once there had been only the obligation to grant a wish.
No surprise, then, that a tea party wherein everyone is all together on a beautiful sunny day is the primary activity that Break's ideal future revolves around. It's to be held in Haven's backyard, of course, where there's ample space and a wall to protect them from the ambling dangers inherent to Trench, and the preparations are happening in earnest. Break likes to scurry around and have his nose in everything, so he can be found in all sorts of places. Before things really get going for the day, of course he takes his morning tea on the back patio with his beloved Rainsworths, in some combination or other. In the backyard with Oscar, he can be found helping to set up the tables and decorations and occasionally getting into ridiculous spontaneous musical numbers. Or, perhaps, in the Alices' craft room working on making the decorations. He's also in and out of the kitchen all day, sometimes antagonizing Gilbert or Reim, baking something or doing the washing up or happy to whip together a lunch for anyone who wanders in hungry from all the work. And, at the end of it all when the tea party is really going, Break is off to the side to listen in on Oscar Vessalius's usual speech, which he never gets tired of hearing:
Today might not be a special day, but...there's still every reason to celebrate it! The weather is fine, the wind is clear, the flowers are in bloom! Everyone, I'm really happy to be here with you today! That's it...today's a wonderful ordinary day, isn't it?
Happy unbirthday!
Everyone gathered lifts their teacups in a toast. Elliot settles in at his piano, dragged outside for the occasion, to play some jaunty tunes. Hayato Ichimonji is around, taking pictures he'll cheerfully pass out copies of later, because of course we all know photographs are a crucial part of every tea party. The sun really is there, brighter than any of the overcast days Trench has yet given them, and everyone laughs and chatters with no concern that they may attract a beast or some other Trench problem. The food doesn't do anything weird to anybody. Nobody is dealing with corruption, or if they were, it's certainly dwindling fast. As the afternoon drags into evening, the twinkling fairy lights that greeted everyone that very first night at the boardwalk illuminate the garden. Everyone is together. All is well.
Never mind that the dream is hazy, and shifts sometimes in obvious ways. Break seems to be in all sorts of places without really having to travel between them, as though this place exists in segments rather than in a continuous stream, and if he gets too distracted his missing loved ones all go still and quiet around him. People can walk in on him making one lunch and in the blink of an eye find him making their favorite instead. And, whether they succumb to it or not, anyone who gets too close to him feels the pull of his wishes on them -- Qrow is relaxed, unworried about the danger inherent to his Semblance, and loves easily. Ange laughs often, her exhaustion lifted. Don't worry about it. Today's a wonderful ordinary day.
And I'm Haunted
Break himself looks different, distinct from his "current" self in Trench. His long ponytail is back, for the sole reason that Shelly Rainsworth loves messing with it, and Break will never deny her anything. He hasn't "aged", per se, but he feels older, the atmosphere around him more gentle and at peace. Baltus has gained a few white patches down his chest and at the tip of his tail, a reflection of the peace Break is feeling, and the handprint and recently added single owl tattoo on Break's wrist -- an emotional blood bond, and an anti-corruption glyph -- have been joined by a couple more handprints and more tattoos on both forearms such that he almost has sleeves, each image a reflection of someone precious to him. These are the only ways his "ideal future" for himself manifests, as he certainly isn't really doing anything different than his usual Trench antics. But he's at peace, and he has so many people he loves enough that he wants to carry them in his heart all the time, and etch them right into his skin.
Every now and again amidst the chaos of the preparations and the party itself, however, Break pauses to take a good, hard look at the arch that seems to be following him around, appearing in various walkways and slowly crumbling away as the day -- days? -- progress. He fell easily to the moths that brought him here, and he can ignore the arch and sink back into his dream, mostly. But the worse the arch looks, the more he feels like he needs to go through it, and the more he's able to glance around and see that this life he's found himself in is not one he has actually earned.
"This place..." He murmurs it softly to whoever is at his side, loathe to disturb anything happening. "It isn't...really real, is it...?"
I Want Ours to Be an Endless Song
In the aftermath of it all, back in Trench proper and its suddenly unending night, Break isn't actually doing too badly. The certainty granted to him by his decision to leave has strengthened him, in a way, and he doesn't regret his choice to set the dream down and return to reality. He doesn't want to be gifted such an existence. He wants to be there for the journey towards it, every step of the way, and catch all the beautiful and terrible moments alike that bring them to such a beautiful future. This is really the only option for a man who gave his life to preserve his only timeline, even with all the pain and anguish embedded in it.
Even so, he's quiet and withdrawn those first several days...nights...that first week at home. Even if turning away was the right choice, that life was a beautiful one, and Break mourns it. He spends a lot of time pausing in what he's doing to stare absently at nothing, or to gaze out of the nearest window, and he's decidedly less chatty than usual. Baltus, all shadow and black again, sticks to him like glue, encouraging him to come along on his patrols and remaining in constant contact with Break when he's settled somewhere. Break leans over to rest his forehead against his omen's often, rubbing at the borzoi's ears.
"Ah, Baltus. Just how many lives is this place going to make me grieve?"
[OOC: Please enjoy this guided wildcard in the form of a novel! Please feel free to tailor a situation to suit yourself, have your character's "ideal" influence Break in turn, go as fluffy as you like, do a thread in the dream and come back for the aftermath later, whatever. I'll NPC the other Pandora Hearts characters as necessary! Since they're Break's idea of themselves, it's not like I can get them wrong.]
What: The "ideal future" arch from the test drive: Blessed Are the Curious
When: Early April
Where: Break's backyard, except for the part where it isn't, because we're on the other side of the arch
Content Warnings: Everyone exists in a dreamscape that gives them altered memories. It is great so leaving it will be very sad.
"I don't want to die. I want to still be here."
Break's ideal future is not complicated at all. Not even a little bit. He has a great many people he loves, many of whom he misses desperately, and he wants them all in the same spot and he wants them thriving. Not even necessarily happy all the time, but fulfilled. Healing,, if that's what it takes. To that end, the illusion crafted by his whims is essentially a peaceful version of his new life in Trench with a whole lot of people from home added in. Anyone who interacts with him in this dream will find themselves influenced by -- and possibly entirely under the sway of -- his notion of what a wonderful future would look like for them. And, existing in this dream comes with an innate knowledge of certain people they have never met, all of whom can even be interacted with, though they reflect Break's ideas of them, too.
The Rainsworths: All three of them are here, of course. These women are Break's precious family, the ones who gave him his second chance and made him the person he is. Sheryl Rainsworth, the matriarch of the family, is a gentle noblewoman of around seventy years old, always well dressed and impeccably put together, damn near impossible to rattle. Bound to a wheelchair at home, she remains unable to walk in Trench -- possibly. We think. It is possible she could walk if she felt like it, but as a darkblood, she has a nice new chair that she floats around in at her leisure instead of waiting patiently to be pushed. She may simply prefer it, given the way she is so often heard chortling to herself and calling out mild warnings as she comes close to buzzing people in passing. Any and all chaos and shenanigans occurring around her are met with "Hohoho. My, that's interesting, isn't it?" Shelly Rainsworth, her daughter, is a lively woman in her mid-thirties -- having had extremely poor health at home that took her away from her family at a fairly young age, in Trench she is energetic and vivacious, and is storming through her new life with no trouble. It's common knowledge that she is Break's previous lover, and he's still utterly devoted to her. After all, the serene greediness of her personality is the primary thing that saved him from his own rock bottom, long ago. She has apparently taken Break's relationship with Qrow to mean that Qrow's butt is also hers to pat lovingly in passing, but outside of menacing the both of them with relentless flirting, she is content to leave them to it and go make friends ("friends") elsewhere without the boundaries of proper society and her health to dictate her shenanigans. Lastly, Sharon Rainsworth, who some know as the girl Break considers to be his daughter. She still calls him Brother Xerx when she's feeling especially affectionate and he still feels no need to correct her -- and, more importantly, having grown up something of a lonely and isolated child, any and everyone Break has a solid relationship with in Trench also belongs to her now. Ruby, Yang, Ange, White Alice, Lysithea -- congratulations, you are all her sisters. Most importantly, it is known that Sharon arrived in Trench still trapped in the body of a thirteen year old girl, despite being twenty-three. In Break's ideal future, the magic that caused this is lifted and Sharon has grown up at last, a carbon copy of her mother able to go out into Trench and mingle as she likes.
It is painfully obvious that the reason Break gets away with so much shit is that the Rainsworths think his nonsense is hilarious.
Reim Lunettes Break's best friend, a twenty-six year old nerd with the cantankerous soul of an eighty year old man. Reim arrived in the house and immediately started running it, for lack of anything better to do, because he is the sort of person who could scold a hurricane until it turned itself into a wee rainstorm to politely water his garden. (Xerxes Break is a lost cause.) Many of his interactions with Break come across as Reim relentlessly bitching at him, with Break basking in the attention and often deliberately making it worse. But they're also endlessly devoted to one another -- because this is Break's ideal future, Reim has never been in enough danger in Trench to send him on a murderous rampage, but it is known that he has done so in the past -- and Break getting into trouble always results in Reim seeing to it that whatever he needs happens immediately and with great efficiency. If anything, living together in Trench after Break's death has brought them even closer, as it's mellowed Break out enough to show his appreciation of Reim more openly. An amiable and helpful person, Reim is happy to help out whoever else comes to him with a problem too, his nerves and stammering and anxious glasses-cleaning habit hiding a sturdy and reliable personality.
He's Break's handler, is what we're getting at. He can often be found in a trio with Break and Sharon, the Rainsworth bubble back together again.
Gilbert Nightray: Qrow had Ozpin. Gilbert had Break. Qrow arguably got the better deal, honestly. A young man in his mid-twenties who has only one arm these days, Gil is the third member of the Oz-Black Alice-Gil trifecta, and is most often chasing one or both of them around. Having learned to cook out of concern for Break years previous, he is also often found in the kitchen, where he and his old mentor have settled into a bitchy sort of teamwork together that works primarily because they each have their own specialties. He comes with a giant skull-headed Raven that spits blue fire, and meets most idiotic Trench shenanigans by pointing accusingly and screaming at them. The awareness of Gil in this dream is a little hazy, a reflection of one of Break's strongest regrets in Trench -- that Gil only realized who he was and grew up right at the very end, such that Break didn't have much time to get to know him. But he's here, because Oz and Alice need him, and whenever Break feels the need to go out and kill a beast for some reason Gil is inevitably at his side. Every now and again he's riled enough to overcome his own fumbling and make friendship speeches at people, and what he says he'll do, he does.
Elliot Nightray: The boy was here for a few months in the very beginning of Break's time in Trench, and the version of him that appears in the dream is a little taller, moves a little more easily, dresses a little more casually. He'd only just gotten started that first time around, and Break was seeing the barest beginnings of a war stirring within him then, as obligation drove him to the Hunters and love drove him to his piano. Here in Break's "ideal", Elliot has chosen the latter, and works as a musician for one of the local Sleeper clubs. The other residents of Haven won't ever replace the family he lost, but they've given him a new one to fuss over, and in that sense he sort of serves as Break's right-hand man. It was Elliot, after all, who was clear-eyed enough even in the midst of his own grief to realize that Oz needed a lot of looking after and the Alices were in want of people to guide them to becoming people themselves.
Oscar Vessalius The Duke of Vessalius and Oz's beloved uncle, a wild and rambunctious fountain of positivity and love. Oscar is the one who taught everyone else the philosophy of the Unbirthday -- the active choice to celebrate the every day beauty of the mundane, and to treasure being with your loved ones in a conscious way. Break has him here both because he adores Oscar and has for years, and because "what would Lord Oscar do" has been his question to himself whenever he needs to cheer up a kid in particular. Oscar has met Trench's everything with unyielding light, routinely throws parties at it, and is known for dragging anyone who looks too sad -- or corrupt -- into insane shenanigans that may or may not involve sneaking into random places in disguise. His wife and child are around too, unseen, because separating them again would just be too cruel. Let him wax poetic at you about his Lovely Wife Sarah, a commoner he met while out mingling and masquerading as not-a-duke, fell for, married despite the scandal, and has been devoted to all his life. Yes, he even has that kind of love story. He's what Break tries to be, and Break isn't nearly so successful at it.
Bonus RWBYs: Where there is Break, there is Qrow, and Qrow's ideal has the rest of his family returned to him -- Yang, the niece he's actually related to by blood, Ruby's half-sister; Raven, his own twin, reconciled; Clover, the amiable ex who has finally settled in to really creating a life for himself now that he won't simply be ripped back to whatever does or doesn't await him in Remnant's afterlife; Tai, because the girls need their dad, and of course, his Shelly, the notorious Summer Rose. Given that Break doesn't know any of these people himself, the actual details on them are vague in the dream unless Qrow himself is also around to influence it. But one thing's for sure: Summer and Shelly are besties who routinely and lovingly terrorize everyone together, and they've drawn damn near everyone who could possibly be relevant into frequent mother-daughter activities ranging from shopping trips to club nights to tea parties.
Ange's Family™ is also around, probably. There are no details on this whatsoever because the only concrete facts he has here other than "they're dead" are "there's this one aunt we really don't like" and "the brother ran off with some asshole", and quite frankly Break is not touching that. Whoever's around, Ange is happy about it. We do not need to think about it any harder than that.
A Very Merry Unbirthday
This is probably not the moment to be thinking about this, but...once we're back, I would like to hold another tea party.
So said Oz Vessalius as they all roamed the streets of Sablier together, on their way to try and save the world. That moment had been pivotal for Break, who had been stunned to find himself happy to be there with them in spite of everything. It was a side effect of the way Oz had punched a crack in his armor all the way back at the theater, allowing the lot of them to worm their way properly into his heart, and as the others planned their party all around him he simply couldn't deny it anymore. He'd known, then, that he was never going to see such a party, and that Oz himself was probably well aware it was the last time they'd be together like so. But the boy's capacity to hope in such a way all the same had kept Break going long after his last fight ought to have killed him, and let him die with hope in his own heart in turn where once there had been only the obligation to grant a wish.
No surprise, then, that a tea party wherein everyone is all together on a beautiful sunny day is the primary activity that Break's ideal future revolves around. It's to be held in Haven's backyard, of course, where there's ample space and a wall to protect them from the ambling dangers inherent to Trench, and the preparations are happening in earnest. Break likes to scurry around and have his nose in everything, so he can be found in all sorts of places. Before things really get going for the day, of course he takes his morning tea on the back patio with his beloved Rainsworths, in some combination or other. In the backyard with Oscar, he can be found helping to set up the tables and decorations and occasionally getting into ridiculous spontaneous musical numbers. Or, perhaps, in the Alices' craft room working on making the decorations. He's also in and out of the kitchen all day, sometimes antagonizing Gilbert or Reim, baking something or doing the washing up or happy to whip together a lunch for anyone who wanders in hungry from all the work. And, at the end of it all when the tea party is really going, Break is off to the side to listen in on Oscar Vessalius's usual speech, which he never gets tired of hearing:
Today might not be a special day, but...there's still every reason to celebrate it! The weather is fine, the wind is clear, the flowers are in bloom! Everyone, I'm really happy to be here with you today! That's it...today's a wonderful ordinary day, isn't it?
Happy unbirthday!
Everyone gathered lifts their teacups in a toast. Elliot settles in at his piano, dragged outside for the occasion, to play some jaunty tunes. Hayato Ichimonji is around, taking pictures he'll cheerfully pass out copies of later, because of course we all know photographs are a crucial part of every tea party. The sun really is there, brighter than any of the overcast days Trench has yet given them, and everyone laughs and chatters with no concern that they may attract a beast or some other Trench problem. The food doesn't do anything weird to anybody. Nobody is dealing with corruption, or if they were, it's certainly dwindling fast. As the afternoon drags into evening, the twinkling fairy lights that greeted everyone that very first night at the boardwalk illuminate the garden. Everyone is together. All is well.
Never mind that the dream is hazy, and shifts sometimes in obvious ways. Break seems to be in all sorts of places without really having to travel between them, as though this place exists in segments rather than in a continuous stream, and if he gets too distracted his missing loved ones all go still and quiet around him. People can walk in on him making one lunch and in the blink of an eye find him making their favorite instead. And, whether they succumb to it or not, anyone who gets too close to him feels the pull of his wishes on them -- Qrow is relaxed, unworried about the danger inherent to his Semblance, and loves easily. Ange laughs often, her exhaustion lifted. Don't worry about it. Today's a wonderful ordinary day.
And I'm Haunted
Break himself looks different, distinct from his "current" self in Trench. His long ponytail is back, for the sole reason that Shelly Rainsworth loves messing with it, and Break will never deny her anything. He hasn't "aged", per se, but he feels older, the atmosphere around him more gentle and at peace. Baltus has gained a few white patches down his chest and at the tip of his tail, a reflection of the peace Break is feeling, and the handprint and recently added single owl tattoo on Break's wrist -- an emotional blood bond, and an anti-corruption glyph -- have been joined by a couple more handprints and more tattoos on both forearms such that he almost has sleeves, each image a reflection of someone precious to him. These are the only ways his "ideal future" for himself manifests, as he certainly isn't really doing anything different than his usual Trench antics. But he's at peace, and he has so many people he loves enough that he wants to carry them in his heart all the time, and etch them right into his skin.
Every now and again amidst the chaos of the preparations and the party itself, however, Break pauses to take a good, hard look at the arch that seems to be following him around, appearing in various walkways and slowly crumbling away as the day -- days? -- progress. He fell easily to the moths that brought him here, and he can ignore the arch and sink back into his dream, mostly. But the worse the arch looks, the more he feels like he needs to go through it, and the more he's able to glance around and see that this life he's found himself in is not one he has actually earned.
"This place..." He murmurs it softly to whoever is at his side, loathe to disturb anything happening. "It isn't...really real, is it...?"
I Want Ours to Be an Endless Song
In the aftermath of it all, back in Trench proper and its suddenly unending night, Break isn't actually doing too badly. The certainty granted to him by his decision to leave has strengthened him, in a way, and he doesn't regret his choice to set the dream down and return to reality. He doesn't want to be gifted such an existence. He wants to be there for the journey towards it, every step of the way, and catch all the beautiful and terrible moments alike that bring them to such a beautiful future. This is really the only option for a man who gave his life to preserve his only timeline, even with all the pain and anguish embedded in it.
Even so, he's quiet and withdrawn those first several days...nights...that first week at home. Even if turning away was the right choice, that life was a beautiful one, and Break mourns it. He spends a lot of time pausing in what he's doing to stare absently at nothing, or to gaze out of the nearest window, and he's decidedly less chatty than usual. Baltus, all shadow and black again, sticks to him like glue, encouraging him to come along on his patrols and remaining in constant contact with Break when he's settled somewhere. Break leans over to rest his forehead against his omen's often, rubbing at the borzoi's ears.
"Ah, Baltus. Just how many lives is this place going to make me grieve?"
[OOC: Please enjoy this guided wildcard in the form of a novel! Please feel free to tailor a situation to suit yourself, have your character's "ideal" influence Break in turn, go as fluffy as you like, do a thread in the dream and come back for the aftermath later, whatever. I'll NPC the other Pandora Hearts characters as necessary! Since they're Break's idea of themselves, it's not like I can get them wrong.]
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She feels that sting of pain bull down and she smiles a bit more softly, she gives him a light nudge on the arm. "I don't think you have to worry about that. It's not always the easiest thing to do but it's not something I'd ever want to let go of. I's helped me through more than one situation."
She gazes around the room gently and she doesn't falter but her shoulders do a sag a little. "I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt. A part of me wishes I could just fall into it live carefree for a little while. But- I guess I have a bigger responsibility here and that takes priority over how I feel right now."
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"That you would say such a thing...it's a side effect, I should think, of being tasked with a duty far bigger than you, to fix a world-ending problem you had nothing to do with causing." He sounds utterly exhausted, and the smile he turns to her is a little bitter. "You aren't even wrong. That's how it is, if you're going to live in service to others. However, I hope that...rather than shove your own feelings aside entirely, you'll find some way to indulge them. Otherwise they're liable to come exploding out of you regardless at some inconvenient and embarrassing time, you know...?"
The way he's phrasing it is a little humorous, perhaps, but there's an undercurrent of "don't ask me how I know".