( open ) do not stand on my grave and weep

[jedies]

Who: Obi-Wan + You
What: Obi-Wan updating to Post Revenge of the Sith
When: May 7th
Where: Around Trench + Obi-Wan's House

Content Warnings: Possible intense discussions of grief and trauma. Mentions of genocide and mutilation.

( i. awakening — closed to immediate cr + vyng )

[ he awoke in darkness.

that is what terrified him momentarily. the darkness closed in on him, on everyone and he had to warn, he had to stop it, he had to do something. the yawning abyss stretched out and obi-wan thrust his hand forward to touch . . . something soft? like the folds of a cocoon. he grasps and pulls, the force answering his cry like the tempestuous rush of the tide —

— and it breaks, light cascading into his strange prison. he pulls himself out with a gasp, dragging himself along the floor. blearily, he blinks, taking in his surroundings before he rasps out in a voice ill-used for days. ]

W — Where?

( ii. drinks on the house )

[ after (hastily) settling affairs, obi-wan drifts around the town like a ghost. his robe is pulled over his head, leaving his gaze in shadow. not that he meets anyone’s eyes for long. listlessly, he wanders until he finds himself at a bar. before, he would have called up constantine and they would have settled themselves in a corner, drinking without judgment but mindful of each other. constantine is gone. abby is gone. all the friends he used to do such things with — quinlan, shaak ti, mace, kit . . . they’re all gone. his family. his brothers and sisters, all in the force.

gone. the absence of their bonds ache like forgotten stars. he signals for a drink with a sigh. if anyone approaches him in his melancholia, he will reply as such. ]

I’m afraid I’m not much for company at the moment. You’d be better suited elsewhere.

( iii. the sword in hand )

[ in the morning, he tries to return to routine. normalcy. he shouldn’t forgo everything simply because he is changed.

oh, but everything has changed.

he performs the exercise without the use of his saber. not everything is reliant on the edge of the blade and he had other skills to hone. every day, every minute. obi-wan may dislike a number of things, but he refuses to be anything less than perfect in all his deficiencies. and there were just so many, cluttering his head and his heart.

obi-wan wrenches himself out of his thought with a jerk of his head and in a hurried motion, draws his saber and — lava and fire burns all around them, but all he can feel is cold, cold is the touch of the dark, cold is the way that withers all and not even the hatred in anakin’s eyes changed that and obi-wan is so cold, why was this happening, how did they come to this —

— he flings his saber in a burst of pain. it soars through the air before falling to the ground, landing on soft grass. it makes no sound. obi-wan can’t hear anything but the ringing in his ears. his knees sink to the ground and he bows his head while his fingers grasp at his ears.

he can’t hear anything anymore. it’s all cold. ]

Comments

[lightthedarkness]

[She's not so sure about his being here.

She moves to sit beside him, being nothing more than a presence. She won't ask probing questions, she won't ask anything, honestly. She will just sit beside him and wait patiently, his lightsaber is resting in her lap.]

[jedies]

[ he breathes it out. it's not poison lingering, but pain. his joints ache in memory. ]

I don't think I can hold it again.

[lightthedarkness]

[She looks down at the lightsaber and sets it to the side.]

Then, don't. [She looks back up at him.] You don't have to. I can hold onto it if you need?

[jedies]

I could.

[ he lets out a laugh that sounds nothing like one. more the whisper of a ghost in the desert. ]

But it's one of the last there is. It is my life.

[lightthedarkness]

[She watches him, carefully and then down at the lightsaber.]

I will do what you ask with it. I can give it back to you, take and hold onto it for a bit, or throw it into the ocean if you want.

But you don't have to make any decision right now. We can sit here a bit.

[jedies]

It's probably . . . for the best I don't decide anything now.

[ now when his life is in disarray. ]

[lightthedarkness]

[She nodded, keeping the saber in her lap. She reached out and put a hand atop his.]

Maybe we should move you to someplace more comfortable, do you want me to walk you home?

[jedies]

. . . That would be nice, thank you.

[lightthedarkness]

[She nods, moving to stand up, putting his lightsaber into her purse before she holds out both hands to Obi-Wan.]

Come on, Obi-Wan, let's get you home.

[jedies]

[ he places his hands in hers. ]

I am in your power.

[lightthedarkness]

Then I will do everything within it to see you well taken care of. [She wrapped her arms around his to help keep him steady, much stronger than her form belied.]

Is there anyone I should call to let them know or should I stay with you? [Letting him stay all alone was out of the question right now.]

[jedies]

. . . No. There's no one.

[lightthedarkness]

Then I will stay with you, however long you need me to be. Let's get you home. [She gave him a gentle squeeze to reassure him of her presence before taking off to his home.]

[jedies]

[ home. oh, that word is an ache in his heart. his home has gone up in flames. ]