Neither ever, nor never

[wannasmash]

Who: Midoriya and: Luz, Ruby, Todoroki, Lance, Riz, Snow White, Makoto Kino + YOU? Plot with me here
What: October, including event stuff. Ugly crying. Making friends with Cloverfield lol. Black Parade. Corpse shadow Loneliness thing. Learning to cook with a bear.
When: October
Where: Black Parade. Farther Shores. Cellar Door. Grocery market.

Content Warnings: My Hero Academia spoilers, grieving behavior, intoxicating craving for meat (thanks Beastars), intoxication due to this month's vileblood effects, minimizing one's own feelings.
Cloverfield's event effects, which can include: psychological-based curse, feelings of intense loneliness, mental health.
Mention of: capital punishment, child abuse, underground drug war, harvesting of human flesh and blood without consent.

Comments

Black Parade + Loneliness

[wannasmash]

First it was a vague, nameless anxiety, then a true grief, though no one had died. He accepted he could not go home, because it was impossible, and he had a new life here. But he missed everyone terribly. He mourned his previous life.

He jumped at the chance to distract himself with the upcoming festival, but not to have fun. He couldn't bring himself to. He had a choice between crying at night and ruining his sleep schedule, or throwing himself into work and ruining his sleep schedule. He contacted the Hunters and took patrol shifts at whatever times he happened to wake up.

His Hero costume already included a mask. He put on his backpack and the cloak that had been inside it when he arrived and headed towards the Parade. He kept mostly to the sidelines, not feeling up to conversation. Not really how a friendly, reassuring Hero was supposed to act. He could not see the shadow lurking behind him, flakes gathering and slowly taking on a more solid form...

Time for his lunch break. Or was it dinner? What day was it even? Without school, and sleeping weirdly, it was easy to lose track. He looked around, wondering which business owner might let him have rooftop access. It would provide a nice bird's eye view. After being mostly among crowds, he wanted to have some quiet.

sneaking through the woods (quiet, quiet)

[imaglyphwitch]

Something was becoming increasingly clear to Luz: just because October wasn't as bad as in Deerington didn't mean there weren't pitfalls.

She was seeing ghosts everywhere. Moreover, when she wasn't around Luca, she risked explosive headaches which flared at a moment's notice, was painful and then disappeared as quickly as they arrived, leaving Luz reeling. It was an exhaustive experience, but she understood that being a pale blood meant she could help those who were carrying more baggage than they'd like, or would need help when the ghosts started to affect things (and them) more directly.

On one such day, Luz was out with her cloak pulled over her head, looking up what she could get for the house, when she spotted Izuku. She walked over to give him a smile, and was startled to see he looked pretty distant, as if he were merely going through the motions.

So, in natural Luz fashion, she snuck up on the poor, unsuspecting boy and lightly touched the back of his neck.

"Hey Midoriya!"

SHIA SURPRISE

[wannasmash]

A Warmblood's vulnerability this month was so similar to how he already felt that he didn't perceive the difference. He was cast adrift in this world, far from home, and not nearly as strong as he'd like to be in order to help out. His lack of confidence in himself didn't change what he had to do, only how he felt about it before and after. It had always been like that, even when he was faced with things that scared him out of his mind. His body moved to save people before he had a chance to think.

He didn't have to think about this either. His hand shot up to gently bat her hand away as he turned. His reflexes were sharp thanks to his training--but that didn't stop him from being a jumpy nerd when he realized who it was.

"Waaaa--Luz-san!!"

He gestured stupidly with his arms like an ineffective doggy-paddle. That sure did snap him out of his reverie. He grinned apologetically, which showed in his eyes, if not the mouth covered by his mask.

"Sorry about that, but a Hero has to be ready for anything, including pickpockets. Are you enjoying the festival?"

BUT YOU CAN DO JUJITSU!

[imaglyphwitch]

"Holy crap, that was amazing, Midoriya-san!"

Luz couldn't help but be impressed even if he did so a crazy little swim with his arms that were less cool (which Luz wouldn't judge him for, being uncool herself).

"Oh sure, it's a blast! I'm having a lot of fun, eating and partying and making sure I do some dancing to keep any ghosts from preying on some innocent Sleeper. You're lucky you're not a Pale blood, I see ghosts all over the place!"

Strangely, she was far from freaked out by this.

"What about you?"

Cloverfield

[wannasmash]

He'd always told people they could reach out to him if they ever felt overwhelmed, but he was bad at taking his own advice. He could only sleep when he cried himself into exhaustion. His grief for his past life was always worse at night.

The howling wind was strange, not natural. It sounded immeasurably sad. Though he was reluctant to wander around at night, he had to find the source of the sound. It could be a trap; or, someone could be in need of help. He left in his Hero costume, mask in place. Because it was October, he passed more than one group of late-night partygoers.

He found him near where he himself had washed up on the Farther Shores. A kaiju was normally something to avoid in this world. However, Midoriya erred on the side of understanding people rather than fearing them, and he was an observant person. He saw Cloverfield, hunched over and crying, for what he was: someone feeling lost and alone.

So it was inevitable that he ended up lowering his mask and striking up a conversation. Cloverfield extended a forearm so he could sit on it like a small bird and hear him better. Big tears fell from Midoriya's eyes before his throat even had time to start choking up.

"So you miss everyone too?"

[onekindsoul]

It seemed like Ruby wasn't the only one who had been drawn out the longing cries of Cloverfield. October had proven to be a lot more solemn than absolutely terrifying than she had expected. But- Where as last year she had been driven mad by the sudden loss of so many family members, all she was left with was a breaking heart for the ones that weren't able to join her here.

She wasn't the type to intimidated by a hulking creature and honestly her heart knew exactly how Cloverfield must feel. She sort of shyly approaches the two trying not to just intrude on the moment.

"...It's okay to feel a little lonely. I think we all do from time to time."

[wannasmash]

He flinched, but he could hardly be embarrassed since he'd been caught crying fair and square. He couldn't muster the energy to hide it. There was hardly any room in his heart for anything other than the ache eating away at it.

That voice sounded familiar. He wiped his entire tear-ridden face on his forearm and blinked down at her over his shoulder.

"Rose-san?" he asked in a shaky voice. He sniffed wetly. "What are you doing here?"

It was asked without malice. He was just genuinely puzzled why anyone besides him would be wandering around the beach at night.

[onekindsoul]

She wasn't about to start judging for the tears. She tended to push down the pain and press forward herself but she was learning more and more that wasn't the healthiest way to go about things. She looks between both Izuku and Cloverfield.

"I thought I'd come down for a run. The beach is kind of nice for that and if people wash up on shore they at least have a friendly face, you know?" Her eyes shifted to focus a bit more on Cloverfield.

"Plus- It's hard to notice that this guy is hurting, you know?"

[azurestar]

Lance comes to the Farther Shores regularly to see if any of his loved ones have washed up. And to take in the Ocean. In Deerington there was no Ocean, except on rare occasions when the nightmare would shift. And he grew up in Cuba right on the beach, so the sound of washing waves usually brings him a melancholy sort of comfort.

The Pthumerian Ocean oddly draws him more than he can remember an ocean doing so, and perhaps that's because the Ocean itself is a Pthumerian who happens to be his patron. The loneliness of this month is getting intense, though. Not even being by crashing waves is helping, in fact it feels like it's drowning him.

He's about to leave, when he spots the massive Cloverfield down the shore and a vaguely familiar person near him. He knew Deku when he was in Deerington only briefly, so he's not really recalling his name just yet as curiosity and the heavy weight of loneliness and isolation push him to investigate.

"…I know I do." Lance admits from his spot nearby the ground, his voice subdued and heavy. He's not sure what else to say after that, realizing now as he sees the tears that he might have stepped into something private and intimate.

[wannasmash]

The beach reminded him of the one he had cleaned up back home with All Might. That had been part of his training before he could even receive One For All. His origin back home, and his origin here... He had hoped that the first would comfort him about the second, but all this beach did was remind him of everything he had lost.

He sniffed and tried not to make too many gross unintelligible noises while he wiped his face on his sleeve. He was an ugly crier.

He didn't know this person. Midoriya glanced back up at Cloverfield questioningly. Despite the Pthumerian being many times their size and probably more than capable of defending himself, Midoriya felt protective of him. He felt protective of pretty much anyone who was in distress. Cloverfield, thankfully, wasn't scared of this stranger.

"Sorry, I didn't know anyone was there. It's pretty dangerous to be out at night," said Midoriya, who was out at night.

[azurestar]

Lance shifts a bit awkwardly, rubbing at his neck a bit as he looks down and to the side. Yeah, definitely stepped into something private, and he's not really sure why. His feet sort of just carried him over on his own, perhaps instinct and aching need to not be alone. He was prone to loneliness and homesickness before he went to Deerington, so it's been tough on him.

"Don't worry about it, man. I was just in the neighborhood, y'know. I get less headaches when the moon's out," he looks Deku and Cloverfield over with a studious and sympathetic eye, "What about you and… big guy here?"

Loneliness (closed to Todoroki)

[wannasmash]

Without school to take his mind off things, his homesickness was worse than ever. It followed him like a heavy, choking cloud. He cried every night and slept erratically. He knew there was no going back, but that didn't stop him from missing everyone back home. His mom and All Might... His friends and teachers... When he started high school, he never imagined that he could have friends. He wasn't super social--usually, others planned and roped him into things--but he'd grown very attached to Class 1-A.

Having a big heart meant there was room for a lot of people in it. It also meant he had a lot to lose all at once.

He could visit the one person from home he had. These days, helping someone else was one of the few things he could put a game face on for. Todoroki had arrived and spent a month alone. Midoriya could only imagine what it must have been like. Comparing his own experience to that, Midoriya felt he should spend less time being heartsick and more time checking on his friend. He pulled out the Omni and texted him.

One of the vendors gave me some food for patrolling in the area. I thought we could share. Where are you?

[swellter]

Todoroki, on the other hand, knows how to be alone. Despite being the youngest of three, he spent his childhood in isolation. Even the dangers of Trench seem all too familiar. Alone and afraid of a monster much larger and stronger than him are how he spent his formative years making him uniquely suited for the pitfalls of this place.

He's not afraid of Trench or the monsters that lurk behind every shadow. The isolation doesn't bother him either, he knows how to keep himself busy. In his first month here, he's come across a few people that stick out in his mind and while he wouldn't consider them friends, he's not lonely just alone.

When he receives Midoriya's message, Todoroki is on foot in the Entertainment District. Having finished his patrol of the place, he's on his way to the lamp location. The message is unexpected but not unwelcome. Making his way out of the middle of the moving crowd, he stops at a storefront, a meter away from the door to answer.

They probably appreciate all your hard work. You must have done a good job.

I'm in the Entertainment District. I was heading to the lamp location now that my shift is over.

[wannasmash]

I didn't do much really. Just shoplifters and people picking pockets. That was the shopping district, so I'm nearby. I'll meet you.

Teleporting was getting a little less disorienting now, but he still wasn't prepared for the wall of noise that hit his ears. He almost dropped the bag with the takeout containers. A show was playing in the theater at full force. Most people were inside. A few glittering patrons smoking outside stared at the short, unfashionable newcomer blocking the lamp entry. At least, he thought they were staring. It was hard to tell, when they were wearing full masks in the shape of owls in the spirit of the season. He straightened his hero mask and quickly moved out of the way into an unobtrusive corner of the large portico.

If they had been Palebloods or Night Walkers, they would have raised a fuss. A gray, ragged, corpse-like double with dead, shadow-rimmed eyes prowled silently in Midoriya's wake.

[swellter]

Maybe they see it differently than you.

Shoplifters and pickpockets are your standard criminal, but to them, it's a bad day. Thanks to your efforts they were able to have a peaceful one.

At least, that's how I see it.

He tacks on to the end as he continues toward the lamp location. It's not until he's amid the moving crowd that he reads the rest of the message and raises his head, searching the crowd for a familiar face. He doesn't see him.

You want to meet at the lamp location?

He asks, needing the verification. Otherwise, he has no idea where else he wants to meet, though after patrolling the area most of the day, he can probably find his way to wherever he chose.

How Do I Food? (closed to Riz)

[wannasmash]

After weeks of fighting homesickness, loss, and his own Loneliness apparition, Midoriya was tired. He had to accept it was finally time to take care of himself in a more sustainable way than just taking as many Hunter patrol shifts as he could, sleeping at whatever times he collapsed into bed, and eating whatever food he could get at short notice.

The fastest change he could make was food. As part of his 10-month pre-high school workout plan, he knew what eating healthy and hearty looked like. But his mom had done the shopping and cooking for him. Then, when UA switched to a dorm system, the school did. His only job had been to do well in school and at his work-study.

He learned how to make curry at summer camp, and... that was about it. Midoriya didn't even have the luck to be naturally good at everything like Bakugou, who knew his way around a chef's knife.

The high school student in very plain Trench clothes and his own bright red shoes frowned dubiously at some gourd-like things on display. What the heck were these, and how was he supposed to cook them? His welcome backpack was slung over his shoulder with his cloak, but he had made no progress filling it with groceries. His shopping basket was likewise empty.

The canned goods weren't much better. Everyone did their own canning on a small scale, not factory-made, so there was no standardized way of labeling things. Some included helpful recipes--for things he didn't know the names of. Others would barely pass ingredient list regulations back home.

"Trench is difficult in more ways than one..." he muttered.

[sideeffect]

Riz has slowly been acclimating to finding his way about the markets of Trench, as well as familiarizing himself with the sorts of food varieties available. He has to avert his gaze at any meat selections - he could smell the cuts of meat well before he could spy them in the marketplace. It was distressing, and distracting, and being tipsy while he tried to concentrate wasn't much help.

He's slowly learning that, too: that vilebloods should eat spoiled to best function. It's for that reason he's more comfortable buying larger quantities of food - as much as his meager collection of pretty rocks could afford, much less a selection that would be available in a place like the Trench.

He sees the boy first on his way about the shop, and then back again (he's still there, considering!), and then his ears swivel toward his voice when he mutters. Eventually, Riz stops a few feet away while holding a vegetable of his own; he's not intending to sneak up on the guy (this time). But he does pipe up, voice on the lower side,

"You lost?"

Spoken in some jest - because, right, it's been hard not to notice how long this boy has been mulling over the display.

[wannasmash]

How could he not notice someone so tall passing by again? But it was rude to stare. Riz's height was the standout characteristic to Midoriya, who was very short in comparison. But a bear wasn't out of the ordinary to him. There was someone in his own Class A who had a bird head, and someone in Class B who was covered in hair and could transform into a beast.

He jumped at someone addressing him while he was muttering like a dweeb. It was something he was used to being caught at, so he just accepted it. He even felt he ought to explain himself.

"In a way, yes," he groaned lightly, scratching his hair self-consciously. "I've never really lived on my own before or done much grocery shopping. And all the produce is different from what I see at home. But I can't live off canned food and takeout forever."

[sideeffect]

Riz can't help the short laugh that escapes at that. "Yeah, a lot of bears my age aren't very good at meal prep, either... Don't think they had much of an opportunity for it. It's just a hobby for me."

He lifts his shoulders in a shrug -- he can't really blame anyone for not knowing, and certainly wouldn't look down on someone for it (besides literally, due to his height). His mouth spreads in a wider, easygoing smile, ever mindful of keeping his fangs hidden.

He hopes he's not overstepping in trying to make suggestions, so he begins in a conciliatory manner,

"Well, what sorta stuff did you like to eat at home?"

Black Parade (closed to Snow White)

[wannasmash]

Midoriya had signed up to be a Hunter and taken a lot of patrols to keep himself too busy to be homesick. If he was honest, telling Snow White he might attend the festival for anything but work was his way of saying he... probably wouldn't. Midoriya was never great about taking care of his own needs. He was tired, physically and mentally, grieving the loss of his home and everyone in it since he arrived here. But he had agreed to try meeting up with Snow White since she seemed so earnest about it. A festival was best enjoyed with someone, and she was new in town like him.

It felt strange to be wearing civvies after spending so much time on patrol in his hero costume. It felt even stranger to pair the hard mask he usually wore with it with a hooded jacket, faded and secondhand, looking like he was out to rob a bank. But he took the locals' warning seriously and disguised himself whenever he went out. Even so, he wore his usual red sneakers, the only shoes he owned. He took out his Omni and messaged her.

I'm here. I'm by a stand selling candied apples. Can you see me?

He lowered his hood so she might recognize him by his mop of dark green curly hair.

[onebadapple]

Snow, for her part, had ALSO dressed differently for the parade at the recommendation of many. Though she wasn't entirely sure how different she looked even with the matching mask, especially since she was still completely surrounded by her animal friends, her omen, a giant stag a dead giveaway for anyone who knew her well. She looked at her omni, adjusting her mask and winced a bit inwardly at the mention of his being near the apples.

Maybe if she just didn't LOOK at them, she wouldn't feel faint?

Snow White saw the familiar green hair and lightly tapped Midoriya on the shoulder.

"I found you!" she giggled.

[wannasmash]

A friend of his back home really loved apples, and had tried the candied ones for the first time at his school's autumn festival. Every time he saw the bright red confections at the Black Parade, they reminded Midoriya of the first time he had ever seen the sad little kid smile. He had unknowingly used them as a marker, as the stall was easy to spot.

He saw a person in red in his periphery drawing nearer, but it wasn't until she reached toward him that he turned and recognized her.

"Ah! You made it!" She looked very cute, and he felt underdressed, but... too late now. "Are these--what on earth...?"

A gaggle of animals. In the city. Well, that was new.

"Wow so cool!" he blurted out. For the first time in days, his eyes lit up. "I have a classmate who talks to animals. Is it like that?"

Beach Sparring

[wannasmash]

Sparring was, for him, something normal that wasn't ghosts or blood corruption or beasts; something that could distract him from the bad combination of grief and homesickness that had worn him down. He made sure to take better care of himself towards the end of the month. Today he was well-rested.

Midoriya was maybe a little too excited about having a sparring session with a new opponent. He arrived early, fully equipped in his hero costume--the Iron Soles and mechanical gloves on his feet and hands that could direct his super strength more effectively for more power. It was a bit much, but he had the option of taking off his support items if necessary. At school, they did training with and without their gear.

Upshore, he set his backpack down next to some rocks and sat, pulling his notebook out.

"No point studying anything specific until we meet, but some review can't hurt..." he muttered to himself.

[thunderingcourage]

Back home regular practice had been a part of her normal schedule, both karate and judo. Which only helped with the regular fights that she got in standing up to bullies and jerks, as well as the monsters and enemies that she encountered since reawakening as Sailor Jupiter.

Midoriya had mentioned that he was training to become a hero, and she admired him a little for that. She wondered though how serious he was about it and if it was something that he should do. After all, she'd been injured pretty bad numerous times fighting, and had even died fighting her enemies on more than one occasion. Luckily either way a little bit of sparring wouldn't hurt and if nothing else would give him some way to defend himself.

Makoto showed up just wearing a pair of dark slacks and a t-shirt with a jacket. She was a few minutes late, but not enough for it to really be noticeable. Usagi hadn't been home and Atsushi was sleeping so she had to leave a note telling them where she'd be.

"Hey, hope I didn't keep you waiting. What you looking at?"

whoops got sick but better late than never

[wannasmash]

"Not at all!"

He got the distinct feeling he'd overdressed, but... too late now. He smiled awkwardly, a stark contrast to the cool, confident person he was looking at. He felt slightly embarrassed to be caught being a nerd reading his nerd stuff. On the page was what looked like someone in full armor decorated with mufflers doing a roundhouse kick. (He first learned how to kick from his classmate, Iida.) His drawing was... crude, but passable.

"My notes. I write down anything that might be useful." He closed it and stood up.

"Nice to meet you in person. I usually go by my hero name Deku online, but you can call me Midoriya too." He'd taken to calling deerNet the internet; it was the closest thing he had here to it.