October Catchall

[ezra_of_lothal]

Who: Ezra and you
What: October catch all including Second Death prompts
When: Earlyish October
Where:  The Kenobi-Skywalker-Bridger house and around Trench

Content Warnings: Assume all content warnings that go with the Second Death, may add more as needed

Comments

[jedies]

I don't know. That situation was . . . [ obi-wan hesitates again, uncharacteristically so. this is the most he's ever spoken of mortis and even now, it does not come easily. ] . . . strange. I could not say what was true and what was not.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[He ponders quietly for a moment.]

Were they...a little like Pthumerians?

I've met another being like that, back home. He called himself the Bendu. The one in the middle.

[jedies]

[ obi-wan exhales softly. ]

Quite similar in temperament and power.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[He nods slowly.]

The Bendu was very, uh, set on his purpose.

[jedies]

The others were more dynamic. Dangerously so.

[ezra_of_lothal]

I wonder what their actual connection to the temple on Lothal was.

Although, with them dead and it gone, I guess there's only so much it matters.

[jedies]

Most likely, they've made contact with Jedi in the past.

[ezra_of_lothal]

A very, very long time ago.

I doubt there'd be anything on them in the material I have from the Archives, but I guess it doesn't hurt to check.

[jedies]

Perhaps it's for the best not to look.

I don't think there is more to be said about them.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[Ezra stares for a moment.]

Because they're dead? Or something else?

[jedies]

. . . Because it's dangerous to meddle in forces beyond our comprehension.

[ezra_of_lothal]

First - I don't think keeping records, or examining what we have, is the same as meddling. That's just trying to keep track of what we know and don't know.

Second, you could make that argument about using the Force, at all.

[jedies]

[ obi-wan frowns at him. ]

You want to say the Force is beyond comprehension?

[ezra_of_lothal]

Ignorance, yet knowledge.

Our comprehension can never be complete, can it? But that doesn't mean we should embrace ignorance, either.

[jedies]

And I never claimed it was. I said it was dangerous.

So are you looking for this knowledge for knowledge's sake? Somehow I highly doubt that.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[He blinks at Obi-wan in bewilderment.]

...yes, because I'm trying to do everything I can to preserve knowledge about the Force and the Jedi.

What in the world do you think I'd be trying to do with it?

[jedies]

[ unfortunately for ezra, when it comes to mortis, obi-wan gets very stubborn. ]

The Force is mysterious by nature. To be felt, not broken down for ease. A Jedi would know that.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[Ezra stiffens and snaps-]

Did I imagine that the temple on Coruscant kept thousands of years of history and philosophy? Am I wrong to think the destruction of all that was a loss?

[jedies]

Of course it was.

But the Jedi are gone. That era is gone. No amount of scrambling for it will ever bring it back to what it once was. Preservation of our knowledge is not key to the Jedi.

It is our ideals that must continue. Our commitment to the galaxy.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[He takes a sharp breath in, clearly struggling for emotional control, but determined to hold onto his temper and have this conversation.

It is, after all, one he's wanted to have for a very long time, and Obi-wan had not been in the right mental and emotional place for it.

Maybe Ezra himself still isn't, now.]

I want - very much - to have this conversation. It's important. Maybe one we shouldn't keep just between us.

[He takes another, more controlled breath.]

I agree our ideals are the most important things. And that the Order will never again be what it was.

I don't agree that knowledge is pointless. That we shouldn't preserve what we can, at least as a matter of historical record.

[jedies]

You're putting words in my mouth again.

Even preservation has purpose. And I'm not convinced of your reasoning.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[Put words in Obi-wan's mouth again?

That accusation hurts - even more than the implication that Ezra is no Jedi, which Ezra is simply choosing to ignore. In his mind, he tries very hard not to impose on Obi-wan, in any sense, and loathes how often he feels like he falls short. That he needs too much.

He likes to think that he listens.

Ezra flinches away and his voice drops softer-]

Ben. I do want to have a conversation about the future of the Jedi,and what it means to be a Jedi here and now -

But what is going on? I don't think I've ever seen you this sort of...prickly.

[Not even when he'd called out Maul. That has been out of anger, yes but Ezra saw it as a more calculated, controlled choice.]

[jedies]

[ he frowns lightly, considering that. perhaps he's not as distanced from mortis as he'd liked to believe. and what happened there. but also the idea of preservation like the jedi are relics or for their history to be imitated . . . for what?

he thinks of them, imprisoned in amber, under water. his jaw tightens. ]

I suggest you take time to think about it.

[ezra_of_lothal]

[That reply feels like a door slamming in his face.

He says, voice low and unhappy-]

...I destroyed the part of the Lothal temple Sidious moved, too. I'm still not clear what exactly he wanted out of getting me to use that doorway, but I knew giving him what he wanted would just end up with more people being hurt. More power for him, more control, somehow.

So of course I had to do whatever I could to stop that.

[jedies]

[ obi-wan falls quiet. ]

And I appreciate that. It is a hard thing to do.