(Open) Lilac last in the doorway bloom'd

[xiaoxiuya]

O the black murk that hides the star! O cruel hands that hold me powerless

Who: Shen Yuan and his CR group, plus anyone who wants a thread <3
What: Discussions of the March Forecast, Monthly Event-related events, or even entirely new ideas are all welcome! Feel free to PM me if you have anything you'd like to discuss beforehand!
When: Any time in the months of March or April, possibly beyond.
Where: Anywhere in Trench; Shen Yuan can most frequently be found near the Archives or his own home in Gaze, meditating under the guardian tree in Sanctuary, or wherever Outreach is providing assistance to the people of Trench.

Content Warnings: Currently N/A on 3/19, will update if this changes.

Comments

Sanctuary -- Closed to Peter Graham

[xiaoxiuya]

Once again Shen Yuan finds himself standing under the guardian tree in Sanctuary's central courtyard, a thoroughly unremarkable sight -- but for the fact that this time, he's waiting to meet someone. He's dressed for the occasion, as well: a new green robe with embroidered sleeves and hem belted in place with a wide sash, covering his practical, Western-style trousers and boots, while his waist-length hair has been half-put up in a traditional topknot and secured in place with a silver pin. Part of him feels ridiculous, playing the peak lord now, but who knows better than he how the trappings of authority can pass for genuine authority, if backed up with enough confidence? And he so badly wants to be someone Peter can trust, someone who can genuinely help the poor kid improve his situation.

He rubs his hands together meditatively, checking the nailbeds for any traces of left-behind cinnabar and rubbing it away. He's not even sure if they'll be using the room he'd been given permission to borrow and ward off by Allen Walker -- it depends on Peter's comfort levels -- but he wanted it ready just in case. If nothing else, drawing the wards and talismans was good practice for when he'll need them for real...

[possessum]

To say he's nervous would be an understatement — Peter's literally having to take a moment to talk himself through stepping up towards the Sanctuary.

The place itself.... unnerves him, even frightens him. With all of its protections and its particular reputation, combined with his severely possessed status, he.... pretty consistently hosts a fear that at any given moment he might have some kind of adverse reaction, and his imagination conjures up a varietypack of horrible effects.... He's only been here once before, for Sansa's birthday several months back, and it did make him feel ill here and there, the entity within him so sensitive to any wards around the banquet hall. Not in any real danger from them, just... affected. Peter can only imagine how it might be further in, and he can't help feeling like he's something that shouldn't be here. (Monster, is the word that whispers at the shell of his ear. You're a monster, something bad.)

...But he's here, and he's continuing on, and he's not running away. Peter remains aware that he needs help. He's been getting it, really, in so many various forms — but there are parts of it that no one has really yet been able to touch upon. Meeting with someone who can maybe look inside of him in the way Shen Yuan seems capable of doing, maybe perceive his and Paimon's situation on that spiritual level... as terrifying as the thought is, Peter also knows it's an opportunity he can't pass up.

And the man has been nothing but kind and helpful to him already. While Peter's fears about what could happen (could go wrong) feel like a tight ball of writhing snakes in his gut, he is trying to trust the process.

He spots the man quickly enough in the courtyard; Shen Yuan certainly stands out with the way he's dressed and his overall presence, and Peter approaches shyly, but with a little smile (nauseous around the corners, but that's Just Peter.)

"Hey—! I made it." His awkward smile nudges upwards a bit as he shifts the shoulder bag tucked against one arm. "It's good to finally meet you in person."

[xiaoxiuya]

And there he is, so obviously nervous and afraid that Shen Yuan's heart aches on Peter Graham's behalf. And just as it did when he was faced with another frightened young man, suddenly he finds it easier to calm down and rise to the occasion, because it's not for himself, now is it? It's for someone who needs his help, and what kind of person would he be if he let them down?

"It is," he agrees, and offers Peter his hand (just his hand for now, his spiritual power kept deftly tucked away under his skin where it belongs). "I'm glad you could make it." And he smiles gently. "Why don't we sit under the tree and talk for a bit? There's no need to rush into anything, I think."

He'd wondered if he'd be able to tell, if meeting Peter in person would betray some strangeness that the omni had concealed, but so far he seems to be a perfectly normal albeit painfully anxious young man. So clearly the first step is so to do something about those nerves, if he can.

[possessum]

Seeing the other in person is definitely a little intimidating — Shen Yuan looks so noble and cool, but it's also weirdly easy to feel comfortable around the guy, with how.... gentle he is, about everything? How he somehow seems to know exactly what to say, and how. Peter's heart is still giving anxious flip-flops, but he's glad to have made contact with somebody who knows about this kind of thing. Makes it all feel less... lonely.

He doesn't even hesitate as long as he normally might, to take the offered hand. Peter gets gunshy about physical touch — for, a number of reasons — but he's reaching to shake the other man's hand, softly.

"Sure, that sounds great, yeah." There's a nod, and an inward exhale of relief to take things slow. As curious as Peter is to see what Shen Yuan might discover, he's also... not exactly leaping to head into one of the Sanctuary rooms.

So he'll move to sit under the tree, long legs folded crossed. Peter's a tall presence but he carries himself as though he wants to be smaller, all six feet of his frame withdrawn.

"Thank you, again. For agreeing to do this. I... brought a notebook so I could take notes, too. Share stuff with Luna." He gives a lopsided little smile, reaching for his bag where he has a few supplies tucked in.

[xiaoxiuya]

In another life that face was one Shen Yuan poured his heart and soul into perfecting, under threat of death. A peak lord must look perfectly calm and collected at all times, and he must never find himself in a situation where he doesn't already know exactly what to do -- a person who is just pretending to be a peak lord, even more so. So it would both embarrass and please him to know he can still pull it off.

It pleases him still more to see Peter taking an active hand. "Good idea," he says agreeably, kneeling next to Peter with the skirts of his robes pooling elegantly around his knees. "Miss Lovegood is the one of the best scholars I know of; I look forward to hearing her insights."

He pauses for a moment there, to consider their options, before suggesting, "Why don't I begin by telling you a little about myself and how my powers work? Then, if you feel comfortable, you can tell me more about yourself and your situation, and we can come up with a plan for how to proceed together."

[possessum]

Tugging a notebook and pen onto his lap, Peter looks back over at his companion, smile warming at the Luna praise. He does think she would be extremely interested to learn whatever she can about Shen Yuan and his world, what he can do. One way or another, all of this is good information, enlightening and potentially really helpful, and he certainly understands the value of an opportunity like this. He almost considered asking Luna if she wanted to come along today, but figured it might be best if it was just him for now — well, him and Paimon, of course. The ever-present, discomforting thought in the back of Peter's mind: whatever he says to Shen Yuan, Paimon is most likely listening in.

But he tries not to think too much about that just now, or about those lingering fears regarding what could go wrong. In the here and now, it's listening time, and a good chance to gather up some courage before he heads deeper in. So the young man readies his pen attentively. It's rare that Peter Graham takes notes, but he'll do this diligently....

"Oh— sure, that'd be great. Whatever you're cool sharing, I'm here for it." Peter gives a little nod, not wanting to press for any personal details, an open book for the other man to reveal what he likes, how he likes.

[xiaoxiuya]

Shen Yuan smiles at him encouragingly. Whiskers on kittens who, an enthusiastic student is a teacher's favorite thing. "Alright," he says, and on a whim pulls his painted silk fan out of his belt and opens it, beginning to languidly fan himself as he begins.

"I am a type of magic-user called a cultivator, and our speciality is the collection and manipulation of a type of spiritual energy called qi, which is produced by all living things." His smile widens. "As the basics of our techniques are shared by martial arts traditions all over Asia and across many worlds, you may already be somewhat familiar with them from anime or martial arts movies." Or Star Wars, for that matter! But that's not a can of worms they need to open right now. Shen Yuan continues,

"Cultivators take the principles of qi refinement a step further by learning how to absorb spiritual energy from other sources, such as those found in nature." He taps the trunk of the guardian tree gratefully. "This tree for instance, thanks to the blessing of the goddess who planted it, is an excellent source of spiritual energy that promotes calm and healing even in those who have no spiritual awareness to speak of. I come here to meditate under its branches every weekend, and by absorbing a small amount of its spiritual power I am able to cleanse myself of corruption and promote my own magical development, without doing any harm to the tree. Although," and here he grimaces; it may be uncomfortable to hear this part, but Peter deserves to know.

"There do exist techniques that can drain all of the spiritual energy from a living being, including a person. But that is simply another form of murder, and those techniques are proscribed in every just society that I know of." He closes his fan, sharply tapping the piece of wood that guards its outer edge against his opposite palm. "I would never engage in such things, not even to save my own life. I mention this only so you needn't feel concerned for your safety around me, should you hear of such things from another person."

[possessum]

Peter's listening with open curiosity — and oh yes, Paimon most certainly is too, and every once in awhile the boy's pupils will suddenly widen and blow out like ink spilling and spreading through water as the demon's focus and energy rears up within its host's body. Perhaps it could be overlooked, not altogether alarming, but something else is watching Shen Yuan, tuning itself into every word.

(Every once in awhile, Peter's tongue brushes the roof of his mouth, slowly, without his awareness that it's happening.)

But when he needs to speak again, his tongue becomes his own, and he's working it into soft words. His pupils settle, returning his eyes to their natural warm browns.

"Were you born able to do it? Collecting and manipulating qi...? Or was it something you had to learn how to do? Can anyone in your world do it?"

The questions come naturally, little bursts of curiosity voiced. It's all extremely interesting, and energy, the different forms of it, is something he's certainly become more and more curious by over time, considering the entity that occupies him and its own connection to such concepts.

[xiaoxiuya]

The changes in Peter's eyes goes unremarked upon, but not unnoticed. Sudden changes to the iris or sclera is a sign of possession in many cultivator stories as well, and Shen Yuan isn't sure how to interpret the fact of Paimon's silent listening. It's a simple and unfortunate fact, however, that he can't say anything to Peter right now without also saying it to Paimon, and so he can only hope that the lack of overt interference is a positive sign that won't come back to bite him later.

"It was something I learned how to do as an adult." He fans himself slowly, considering his next words. "In the world where I was born, cultivation -- all forms of magic, actually -- only existed in works of fiction. I was a big fan of fantasy books of all kinds -- like Miss Lovegood's story, which I enjoyed very much -- but my favorites were all cultivation novels." He smiles sadly. "When I was around your age, a book I'd been following passionately ended suddenly and, I thought, very badly. Around the same time I fell terribly ill, and eventually fell into a deep sleep -- I may even have died, it's impossible to be sure. But when I woke up, it was in a world full of people and places that shared names and precise descriptions with those in the book, and a voice in my head told me it was my responsibility to learn cultivation and 'fix' the plot. I lived in that world for about...four years?" Yes, that sounds about right. "And then woke up in the sea outside Trench. I no longer hear that voice, for which I will always be grateful to the powers that rule this world, and I continue to practice cultivation for both survival and my peace of mind."

"As for whether anyone can learn how to do it, the answer is yes, but with some caveats. Different people have different levels of aptitude for cultivation, just as different people have different levels of natural ability for mathematics or sports. While nearly anyone can master the basics through hard work alone, some degree of natural talent and a bit of good luck is necessary to reach the highest levels of skill. People who began their training as children also tend to see more success than those who started later; it's generally accepted that by the time a student turns twenty-five or so, if they haven't already formed a golden core than they probably never will. But there are exceptions to every rule, of course."