deercountry | Hear Nothing, See Nothing, Say Nothing.

[ April 4th.

Wrench wandered into a more run down tavern in one of the less comfortable parts of Trench. Didn't want flashy (never did, really). Felt at home when the place looked a little run down and you weren't entirely sure if it was safe to sit down or not. If all the taps were working, he didn't want to be there. This place scratched that itch. Dim lights. Smokey interior. Average service. Though he certainly stuck out with his appearance, he didn't come with any of the dramaticisms that he may have on another day. And so people's attention went back to whatever they were doing and away from him fairly quickly.

He sat at the far corner of the bar. No beer today, Wrench felt. Shots was where the mood was right now. He ordered two. Some garbage akin to Jack Daniels. One sat untouched but he clanked the other against it before it went down in the usual how the fuck did he drink that through his mask kind of fashion. And this was how he planned to spend the rest of the evening. Alone. Drinking, thinking. Missing Bagley giving him a hard time for his bad habits.

He's not unfriendly, though. Even if he looked like he might be. If someone wanted to join him he wouldn't push them aside but he may be a lot more subdued than when someone meets him any other day. Just don't touch the untouched glass. ]

[Nara'a frequents these kinds of bars more than he'd admit. It's a good place to listen for information, plus... well, he's more anonymous. Sure, he's still 'the guy with cat ears and a tail', but it's less frequently traveled and he's just more comfortable with hole in the wall places. Sure, he's still a little paranoid about drinks that he hasn't seen be opened in front of him, but he's getting... a little better.]

[He wanders into the bar and orders a drink - nothing too strong. He takes it and looks around and...]

[Well that's a sad sight. He wanders over towards Wrench and leans against the seat.]

... Are you all right? I'm guessing not... do you want to talk about it?

[ Birthdays usually weren't a big deal. Most people didn't even know when his was. He often lied and said it was April 1st (cause he was funny, you see) when he was asked. It would have been just another day if he was still in London. Another voice message from Marcus. And that, dear readers, was the key proponent of tonight's drinking session. The should have done's. The one who got away.

Op, someone was talking to him. Wrench lugged his head up and turned— blink blink. Huh. Didn't dwell too long on the ears and tail thing. Listen, he's watched anime. He'll admit it. ] Wha—? Oh. Uh. [ Awkward laugh goes here. ] That obvious, huh?

[He smiled and shrugged a little bit.]

Somewhat. But... I won't force you if you don't want to. It's up to you.

[Hm. Well. He should ask.]

Do you mind if I sit here anyway? You look like you could use the company. But if you'd rather be alone, I won't push you.

[ Wrench nodded toward the seat with a nod. He's not good at talking about his emotions; not good at expressing them either a lot of the time at least particular ones. So much so that he made a mask and an entire persona to attempt to alleviate some of that. Though the alcohol would help eventually but his mind went spiraling out of control on all the what ifs. It was insane the paranoid gymnastics he was capable of, dude.

The man hummed. ] Hey, uh. Thanks. For asking, I mean. Yeah, please. Feel free to join me.

[ People saw him as loud. He made it that way. He's been a surprising amount of serious lately, actually, which kinda bothered him a little. Needed to fix that sometime soon. Point was, the real Wren— the real Reggie wasn't Wrench, and he looked like Wrench right now but he didn't feel like him. And he was full of all sorts of nervous ticks from the way he talked to the way he fidgeted with the fresh shot glass. ]

I— [ Yup. Words. No worky. He'll just tip the shot glass against the still untouched one and down the hatch with it. ]

[He sat down across from Wrench, setting his drink down lightly. He didn't touch the other shotglass - it was clearly for someone who wasn't there. Whether just 'not in Trench' or 'not alive anymore' he wasn't sure, though there also wasn't that much of a difference given Trench being... Trench.]

Of course. Just because we're in a - well. In a less popular sort of bar. That doesn't mean you can just barge in on someone's thoughts.

[He waited for the other to finish his shot, sipping at his own drink before nodding.]

... You miss them.

[It wasn't a question.]

They must be important to you.

[Gods, how many people could he leave a drink for? Too many. Too many memories and too much blood.]

Edited 2023-04-11 19:00 (UTC)

[ Those glowing X's flicked to something more somber when Wrench cast his gaze back to Nara'a. u_u. And they returned to the bar top shortly after. He could feel that warm fuzzy. Part of the reason he did the vast majority of his emotional drinking alone, even back in Dedsec. Those were people he trusted but not enough to let them know more about him than he was willing to give sober.

Fingers picked at the glass. And here he was. Slipping, like he'd been slipping for the past several years. Guess a person could only maintain that kind of armor for so long. Now he was here in some dive crying over a boy. ]

Sharon said. [ It almost surprised him that his voice modulator was still on. That was how not-Wrench he felt. He tried again, idly turning the empty shot glass in his palm now. ] that friends often wash up after one from a group has arrived but. [ He shook his head a bit. ] I hope he doesn't.

[ Then, pulling up that friendly face (took a little dragging but he got there), Wrench turned his attention to the other person again. ] Can I get you a drink, dude?

Edited (aaah i fucked up html lol) 2023-04-14 02:54 (UTC)

[People showing up? ... He wasn't sure. He wasn't sure if he wanted more of his friends here or not.]

I can understand that. And... sure, if you'd like. Nothing too strong. I'm easy to drink under the table.

[He laughed lightly, his tail swishing in amusement. If this was where the other wanted the conversation to go, he wasn't going to stop him.]

Just... don't spend too much on my behalf.

[Though he was still going to watch whomever was pouring the drinks. Just in case. He couldn't quite help it.]

[ Wrench was not exactly thinking about... well, he was thinking about a lot of things, and feeling a lot of things, but he wasn't thinking about what to talk about, or where to go with things. He was just... going, and drinking. A free flow of emotions and thoughts. He shouldn't talk. Maybe he should leave. He didn't, though. He stayed. ]

Choice is yours, man. I'm not usually the make decisions for other people type, but whatever you order let 'em know its on me.

[ He gave a wave for the bartender to come over. It happens, the watching. Whatever paranoia or reason Nara'a had for it Wrench was sure it was a good one. Everyone had their thing, right? Or several. ]

Sure.

[He headed up to the bar, leaving the remnants of his previous drink behind. He considered the options and picked one out, taking the bottle and heading back to Wrench after a moment, sitting down again.]

... You know, whatever you're feeling... it's okay to feel. Sorry if that's a little invasive I just... know plenty of people who would try to stop themselves from feeling. And that's not healthy.

[ Wrench slouched back into his seat even further while Nara'a had briefly departed. He thought about more what ifs and things he should have done before whatever it was that got him landed here had happened. When the other man returned with a drink and spoke his piece on the whole hiding emotions thing, Wrench's body jerked in a reaction that was about to launch into how he was always pretty emotional and open with them.

But that wasn't true. He was open with his anger, and that's where it stopped. Everything else was a ruse. His entire person, the person that Nara'a was engaging with now was a persona that he made in order to keep himself safe and navigate the turbulent waters of society and people that he constantly felt incapable of actually connecting with; that he always felt alien to.

So Wrench looked away for a moment and sighed. ] You know why I wear this? [ A finger pointed up to his mask. Of course the other guy didn't, probably. Opening lines and all that, though. ]

[He pressed his lips together in a thin line. Avoidant, hurt by the world... there were many reasons why someone might want to do that sort of thing. But he couldn't tell for sure, so... he shook his head.]

No. Why?

[It was a strange mask anyway, with some... weird eyes that he wasn't sure what to make of.]

[ He thought about it a little longer. Looked away with a muttered 'nah, it doesn't matter' under his breath. Fingers started to search for something to fidget with. Knee started bopping restlessly. He was drunk, but he wasn't so drunk that he'd just say shit without thinking. Bot this kind of shit, at least. So why the fuck did he just offer to open up to a complete stranger?

Not like him. And yeah, he's grown. He's older. Maybe that was it. Maybe he was tired. Maybe he wanted, some part of him wanted, to let Wrench go. He did before. Again, under his breath, he just mutters a 'fuck it'. ] Well, yanno. [ Wrench finally addresses Nara'a. Expressive, the LED's and his body language. ] Might blow your mind here, but I was a weird kid. [ Okay, not ready to be detailed. That's okay. Baby steps and whatever. ] This. [ A finger pointed to the mask again. ] Helps me navigate things. Like a cane, or— [ it looks as if he's searching for the words with his hands ]

Anyway, its not that I don't let myself feel things. Fuck that toxic masculinity bullshit. Its more that uh, yeah, I dunno. Sometimes I'm not good at... connecting?

Were you now?

[He does his best to hide his smile, but... ah. That... makes sense.]

... I knew a boy who navigated the world in a mask as well. Younger than you - at least physically - but I can understand that. ... Were you afraid I would laugh? Because it's... it makes sense. And anyone who might give you trouble for that is wrong. We all have different ways of moving through the world.

Thank you for telling me, though. ... I know we just met, but you can feel free to contact me whenever you need. My name's Nara'a.

[ makima takes time for herself away from the teenage boys skittering around her home to do adult things. she quite liked drinking and happy hour, and was reminded of simple things during a time she couldn't simply indulge. well, when faced with time where she actually could do all those things and still get attached as much as she liked, turns out she could actually have the closest to fun she's had in her present lifetime.

makima navigates her world and the people in it through scent— she can't distinguish faces, and she much less goes into rusty, shabby little bars without a good reason. she remembers this scent she follows. it is male, a bit wild and playful. she follows it, and that's how she ends up here, slipping into a seat next to the other, but noticing the full glass next to him . . . and avoiding sitting where it stands tall. ]

Dark ale, please. [ to the bar tender. a big, fat mug perfect for chugging. and now that she's shrugging off her coat and fixing herself in her seat: ] What're you doing all by yourself, Wrench?

[ He wasn't his full self back then when they first met. Though if she picked up on personalities and traits through scent alone she'd notice that wild and playful was still there, buried beneath what he was currently feeling. There was more, and it might have been present then too, an anxiety he could never shake. Even if he didn't present it to the public too often. Actually, went out of his way to hide it. Literally. Behind a mask.

Wrench blinked, his head canting to the side to see Makima. Dark ale. Nice, and you know. Suiting. Mhm. There was something about her. He knew it then, too. Couldn't put his finger on it. Wrench was just a human. Nothing less and nothing more. But sometimes people get feelings, you know? The gut says something. ]

Whatcha talkin' about? [ He pushed through the sad. Had no desire to burden anyone that joined him with the woes of his stupid emotions and trainwreck of a love life. though it may well happen. he'll try his best to not. ] I'm not by myself. [ He gave a wave toward her. ] you're here.

[ hoh, that's sweet. folding her coat and hanging it behind her chair, makima pulls closer to the bar and keeps her torso turned enough that she could prop her elbow up and rest her head in her hand. ]

We should drink to that. [ even though she's still quite lonely in a sea of dogs. ] This round is on me.

Bored? [ He asked after tipping his glass up for a cheers. Had to wonder why she was here or if this was just the usual hunting grounds for someone like her who, like him, seemed a bit playful and a bit intimidating. Not quite like Jordi though he really could see her play a similar role.

What Wrench did know, though, was now that he had company he had to shake away the feelings that made him more Reggie and less Wrench for fear of her seeing just how much of a sad little man this playful weirdo actually was. Lonely was an apt description for him, too. Though longing was better and both guilt and shame was even more precise. Fun things for an evening! ]

On the contrary, [ clink! she holds her mug for a moment to finish speaking, ] Happy Hour has become one of my favorite pastimes.

[ makima was almost always bored, but trench has allowed for interesting turns and events she otherwise wouldn't have! it's been quite fun, if she were really going to be honest! if it was something new, which was rare back home, then it was good. she tips her mug and drinks it down to the bottom like water. ]

What about you? [ . . . ] It's not a special day, is it?

Hear Nothing, See Nothing, Say Nothing.

OPEN: THIS DRINK'S FOR YOU.

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