deercountry | ( open ) if you have something to say

Entry tags:

( open ) if you have something to say

Who: Anakin Skywalker/Darth Vader (

facultative) and you!
What: November catchall
When: Throughout November
Where: Various

Content Warnings: violence
i. no fighting
[By this point Anakin is looking like a textbook example of what advanced corruption looks like. Fanged teeth, fever and glassy, bloodshot eyes and an unwillingness to seek treatment has most of the locals giving him a wide berth. He's already drawn his lightsaber against quite a few people who had tried to assist him.

Perhaps your character is minding their own business or perhaps they’re keeping a wary eye on a clearly volatile young man. Regardless Anakin will notice them for whatever reason.]

What are you looking at?

ii. potential for violence
[The next person that tries to convince him to seek help hangs suspended in the air as they try to grapple with the invisible force holding them by the throat.]

Do I look like I need help?

[Slowly Anakin increases the pressure and their eyes bulge before they catch another character’s eyes, one hand leaving their neck to frantically gesture for help.

Otherwise use i. or make up your own prompt! This is mostly so I know who doesn't mind things escalating.]

iii. obi-wan
[Anakin had been hard to locate last month with his bloodtype allowing him to seemingly vanish into thin air, but the new month had removed that advantage and it was only a matter of time before he ran into his old master.]

You look tired.

[He looks worse, but he feels better than he has in a long time. Releasing the weight of his previous indecision having a greater impact than the effects of corruption. He draws his lightsaber, revealing the red blade as he points it against Obi-Wan.]

Last chance to walk away.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[Anakin comes to slowly almost as if he's already aware of what awaits him. He's stiff and sore and he moves to throw a hand over his head except there's nothing there.

And then it all comes back to him.

There was no coming back from this. The knowledge that their worlds would wait for them had once been of comfort and was now a noose around his neck. There was no changing this. Not when he wasn't content enough to let it loom in his future, but to try and bring it about here and now.

He was no Jedi. Never had been.

He curls up into a ball in a futile attempt to block everything out. All the while one word echoes ceaselessly in his head.

Vader.]

[ he can sense the change when anakin rouses. for a moment, obi-wan considers reaching out . . . and then reconsiders. instead he crosses his arms under his cloak before speaking up. ]

Anakin.

[He considers not responding. But Anakin is terrified that he'll take a lack of response to mean that he wants to be left alone and that is the last thing he wants right now.]

Why didn't you do it?

[Hasn't Obi-Wan realised what he will become?]

[ the question lances at his heart. did anakin really think he could have.

and yet. wouldn't obi-wan have done it? if all hope was lost? he had his oath. he knew his duty. and duty is the death of love. ]

I . . . I couldn't.

[Anakin sits up and confirms that Maul's attempt had worked. His eyes are blue again, but they are also filled with despair.]

Is it because it's easier to leave?

[To leave him to his fate is a cruelty he thought was beyond Obi-Wan.]

What? No, Anakin. Nothing about this was easy.

[ his own temper flares briefly with how stressed he has been. so close they had been to losing each other. the pain is still lodged in his chest like a stone. his fingers tighten unconsciously under his robe. ]

I don't — I don't understand. Why, Anakin . . . What made you go this far? I keep looking back and I can't make sense of it.

[He ducks his head and covers his face with his one hand.]

I know what I will do, what I'll become. I thought I could change it, but I can't.

Maybe the kid you raised never really existed. There's no Anakin, everything leads to him.

[ obi-wan frowns, his expression tightly wound. ]

There is always a choice, Anakin. Is this really the choice you wish to make? Is this the future you want?

What does it matter if it's already happened?!

[He scrubs at his face in an ineffectual attempt to stop tears from welling up.]

I-- I want to choose you. [And Padmé and Luke. Not a lifetime of suffering.] But I don't.

[ the tightness fades a little after hearing that. he couldn't help his doubts, not after anakin so vehemently said he despised him and the jedi. all that anger . . . that hate. ]

Of course you can still choose, Anakin. That's why we're here. To find a way.

I'm here for you.

[It's a kindness he doesn't deserve. He's cried so much these past months and every time he thinks he's out of tears he finds there's greater depths to his suffering.

He lets out an anguished cry and sobs. Obi-Wan is just out of reach otherwise he'd insist on getting his tears and snot all over him. Instead he hugs himself the best he can while he tries and fails to say something. There's only fragments of words as he fails and tries to reword his thoughts over and over.

But through it all, there's still the understanding that he meant it when he said that a galaxy without Padmé, wasn't one worth saving.]

[ his heart tears at the corners at the sound. he has never borne anakin's misery well and it wounds him to know his student was pushed so far into despair. he reaches out to place a hand on anakin's shoulder, a warm and comforting presence. ]

[That's all he needs before he's awkwardly clinging to Obi-Wan, demanding care and love from the one person who has never turned him down.

Now his words are clearer to understand, but only because he's trying to repeatedly say 'I'm sorry' over and over.]

Oh, Anakin.

[ they would need to have an honest discussion about all that happened here. there's too much said and unsaid to be discarded. but anakin was here. whole. all hope was not lost for them. obi-wan would do his best to protect it, fragile as it is.

he still had his boy. ]

[It eases something in him to know that Obi-Wan has seen all the darkness inside of him and hasn't forsaken him for it. He doesn't know how he'd deal for when his visions came to pass. One day he'll go too far, but right now he can safely put it to one side.

Slowly, but surely he starts to settle. He's exhausted both physically and emotionally and while he wants nothing more than to go back to sleep he has to at least get this out properly.]

...I should have told you about Luke.

[ obi-wan gives a faint nod though he still seems distinctly troubled. ]

I think there is a lot you need to tell me. And we're due an honest conversation about it all, Anakin.

[Anakin chooses not to reply and distracts himself with scrubbing at his face instead. He doesn't want to talk about any of it and he's gotten away with it so far as things kept cropping up and providing a welcome distraction.]

[ yeah, that's not going to cut it anymore. ]

It may not be now . . . but we will be having it.

Later.

[Maybe Maul will kill someone again and they have a more pressing problem to deal with. And in the meantime he has an arm to fix.]

Later.

But first . . . your lightsaber.

I-- I swapped the crystal in it.

[He didn't bleed his. It's still whole and blue, but in Luke's hands.]

I didn't-- it was already like that.

[Something he would do one day.]

[ he'll have to talk to luke then. and soon. ]

I see. I'll be taking it for now.

[He nods. Anakin thinks it's best he doesn't have a weapon right now, never mind that he isn't any less dangerous without one. It's also perfectly reasonable that he'll kick him out of the Order too. He's done too many things that go against what the Jedi stand for regardless of whatever fondness Obi-Wan has for him.]

Okay.

[He doesn't expect to ever get it back.]

[ obi-wan takes it without fanfare. it feels cold. all of this feels cold. there were wounds on them both. with a sigh, obi-wan reaches out, cradling anakin's face and pressing their foreheads together. ]

It will get better. But you must try, Anakin. You must.

[He closes his eyes, unable to face Obi-Wan so close even as he finds himself greedily reaching for whatever is offered.]

What if it's not enough?

[Do or do not, in Yoda's words.]

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