deercountry | October 2021 Event Overflow

[ While Mako is staring at the surroundings, Ange's gaze does land back on him for a moment - and, in turn, on the other Mako. The younger one. She watches him fade into the city with that slight smile, her gaze lingering on the boy until he's completely gone from view.

It's then, coincidentally enough, that the actual Mako speaks up again, shifting Ange's view right back to his face instead.

.. and seeing the emotion on it. ]

Well.. in that case.. I'm glad I saw it. And glad that you have more than one person to share it with now.

[ Mako might be trying really hard - even as he's failing - to withhold emotion here, but Ange isn't bothering to in the slightest. After all, it's just the two of them here, considering none of the people visible in the city really count.

And why would she bother to hide those feelings around Mako of all people then? She inherently trusts him, and so there's a very open and big smile on her face as she looks at the other. ]

It's not wrong, you know? To miss a place like this, even as you're settling into Trench instead. It's a big part of you.. and it's not like you can just give that up.

...yeah.

[ She's right, of course. Mako was forged here, shaped into at least one version of the person he is. This certainly isn't the future he'd imagined for himself, sitting in a city in a different world, building a life with the former Earth King. If Mako's honest, though, he hadn't let himself imagine any kind of future for himself. Not really. Dreaming was too much effort when he was so focused on scrabbling together food and money and a roof.

What would his younger self think about him now?

Mako has no idea, but he can see the echoes of himself everywhere here. ]

Bolin and I lost our parents early enough that, uh...

[ Mako steps a little closer to Ange, dodging a running kid in a newsboy cap. ]

We didn't end up being able to make enough money to pay rent. I was eight, nobody would give me a job, so—the landlord kicked us out after a few months. We grew up around here. ...on the street, until Toza took us in when I was fifteen.

I... guess it's kind of hard to let this place go.

[ That makes her smile fade a little. It doesn't fully disappear off Ange's face, but it's steadily growing smaller - or perhaps just a bit sadder, especially when it comes to the look in her eyes.

It's not an experience Ange can personally relate to. If anything, it shows that it's so weird how they can be so alike, yet lived such incredibly different lives. ]

.. It must have been tough. [ She slowly says. Even if Ange doesn't know these backstreets of Republic City beyond what she's seeing right now, she can imagine. ] Just.. trying to get by. Trying to survive.

[ ... ]

Trying to look after your brother.

[ Mako hadn't said as much. But Ange knows him. She knows what Mako is like, and having seen the way Bolin usually acts, she can put one and one together. There's absolutely no way he wouldn't have presented himself as The Responsible One. ]

[ Ange is, of course, right on the money. Maybe that's why Mako figured he could tell her: she isn't going to say any of the trite crap that never actually helps. I'm sorry doesn't bring their parents back or put food in Bolin's belly, and Mako has never known what to say to it. It isn't okay. He's not thankful that they're sorry. Really, he'd rather people not know.

But it's a fact of his life, long-since made normal in his own head, and Ange doesn't say those things and so Mako just grins, small and sharp. ]

Yeah, well. He didn't exactly make it easy. You wouldn't believe the trouble Bolin could get into for such a tiny kid. It's like a compulsion, he can't help himself.

[ From what Ange has seen from Bolin so far..

.. well, she can believe it. He does seem like the kind of guy who manages to get himself into the most creative trouble possible, and being even younger and more impulsive sure wouldn't have helped that.

Thankfully it seems like something Mako can actually grin about now. Even if it's small - it's still different compared to looking sad about it. ]

Like what kind of trouble?

[ Maybe it can get him to reminisce on something nice - or at least nostalgic, she thinks.

After all, Bolin is still very much alive, which means he and Mako must always somehow have gotten out of their messes. ]

[ All their stories are cloaked in the sad facts of their lives, is the problem. Bolin tells them with a casual air like if he pretends it doesn't hurt, no one will figure out that it does. Mako has never been able to summon anything like a casual air, because Mako is not a casual person. Mako is stilted and overly-serious.

His face works for a moment as he thinks back on it, watching Ange. ]

We weren't exactly the only parentless kids around here, and nobody had much to go around. It was everybody for himself, you know? We had to hustle pretty hard to get any kind of food.

For protection we fell in with a Triad, the Triple Threats. Ran numbers for them for a few years. We were supposed to hustling up bets for the pro-bending match they'd fixed, some scheme to make them money. Bolin goes into this pet-shop to try and get the owner to commit, ends up falling in love with a fire-ferret that was supposed to be dinner for a pythonaconda, and sneaks back in later to steal him and save it. Almost got himself caught, almost got eaten by the pythonaconda—

[ Mako snorts, remembering it: tiny Bolin with equally-tiny Pabu wrapped around him like a puffed-up scarf, scared and starving. He's always had a giant heart, too big for his tiny body. Mako always had to be the bad guy, make the hard choice for them both. ]

Adopting a pet was... a really bad idea. I could barely feed us and he wanted me to keep a fire-ferret alive too?

But it wasn't like I could say no, so.

That's how he got Pabu.

[ Mako pauses for a moment and looks up with a small smile. ]

Also one time he bet this bun vendor he could eat ten buns in ten seconds and the guy totally didn't believe him. Bo said if he could do it, he owed us all the skewers on his cart. Managed it in five, the vendor tried to have us arrested while Bolin grabbed the skewers, and we had to hide out on a roof for a few days, but that wasn't really Bo's fault. He won fair and square.

[ It is a story that is seeped in some obviously less than great details. Struggling to get food, working for what basically amounts to criminals. Being deceived by people.

But Ange tries to not focus on those details right now - for Mako's sake. Even if that odd other version of him was gone now, it's true that he wasn't looking so great earlier, and Ange sure doesn't want to make that worse. ]

Classic underestimation. [ She ends up saying after the second story, a very faint smile playing on her own lips.

Because Ange is thinking about what makes her feel the most warm inside about these stories - the same thing that might make Mako think back on them fondly, she thinks. And that's just.. sibling affection, isn't it. ]

I'm glad you two at least have each other. I mean, Bolin is.. [ Her voice trails off. Ange hasn't conversed with Mako's brother for long, but the main impression she did get sure was Something, alright. ] .. pretty unique.

But it's obvious how fond you are of him. I mean, you totally could have told him no about the animal, you know. [ No matter what Mako is saying right now. ] Technically speaking. But it's more just that you might have had a hard time denying your cute little brother something, huh?

[ Even though - as Mako said - it would have made their life harder, if they were already struggling to eat. ]

I'm afraid I caught you red-handed in that niceness once more.

What?

[ It's the perfect distraction, because Mako responds immediately with a nearly-joking huff, shoving a hand on his hip to stare down at Ange. ]

How is that nice? How is trying to make my brother give the defenseless fire-ferret back so it could be dinner nice? You're seeing things. I did tell him no, he's just a stubborn shit with puppy eyes and wouldn't take no for an answer.

[ AKA, yes, he had an absolutely impossible time saying no to Bolin and still does sometimes, and after a moment he deflates, looking out across the street. ]

I dare you to look him in the face and tell him to put a fire-ferret to death.

... he does have those impossibly big puppy eyes.

[ Ange will give Mako that, though there's a hint about her tone that almost makes it sound like she's joking. Because yes, that's true, but she doesn't think anything he's saying disproves her point. Because Ange knows that there are so many people out there who could have told him no. She knows Mako is good exactly because she has seen the worst of what people can be.

And Mako isn't like that.

Though perhaps it's a point she shouldn't prod at too much, she thinks. Not all at once. Changing your perception of yourself is hard, and even harder when you feel like you should be projecting something to the outside world.

.. especially this sort of backstreets outside world they're staring at right now. ]

Either way.. thanks for allowing me to help you, Mako. The other you has been gone for a bit already, you know.

[ He is eternally grateful for the change in subject, even if it's—

Unexpected. Mako twists, like she didn't just say that the other him is gone, like he could see him at all. He never could, and he won't now, but he does feel...

Better. Lighter. Less like the memories of home were slipping through his fingers like saltwater from the bay.

Mako sucks in a careful, quiet breath, looks out at the people he doesn't know in familiar clothes with familiar faces, and lets himself smile. ]

...I should be the one thanking you.

Thank me? [ Ange stares at the smile that appears on Mako's face, making her smile a bit in turn as well. ] For helping a friend?

[ Not that she doesn't get it. But it's just the point she's making here. Of course she'd do this much for Mako if it'd help him. Of course she's not just going to let him wander around by himself with some odd half-zombie younger version of himself following him when that sort of thing seems concerning to her.

She knows those things must not come entirely natural to him, given that it doesn't seem like a whole lot of people extended help to him when he needed it when he was much younger, but.. ]

Just call me whenever you need help. Whether it's specifically with this [ the homesickness, since apparently she can at least do something about that very directly, thanks to her powers ] or anything else.

[ And since Mako is sometimes a little bit too much like her, she can't help but add-- ]

.. I mean that, okay? Don't make excuses like 'I'll handle it by myself' or 'they're all probably too busy anyway' if you're ever having trouble with something.

[ Mako shoots Ange a look that can only be described as annoyed, yet fond. ]

Stop calling me out like that.

This, uh. This isn't, I don't know. Draining your energy, is it?

[ He wants to stay. Just long enough to memorize the cracks in the streets and the smells in the air, the way laundry flaps in the quiet breeze, the raccooncrows perched on the edges of buildings he grew up around. He needs to commit this to memory with as much accuracy as he can, because this place is gone to him otherwise. ]

[ Apparently the annoyed-fond look and remark don't seem to bother Ange in the slightest, since she only reacts with a slight, but nonchalant shrug, accompanied by the words: ] Hey, I'll stop when it's not needed anymore.

[ But until then, Mako. Until then!! Ange knows you too well because she knows herself too well, so she knows exactly how to hound him about this stuff.

.. though it seems that the tables are being turned a little here for now. Because when Mako asks that question, Ange lets out a: ]

Well..

[ And along with that sound, her gaze shifts. If Mako follows it, he might see the thin trail of blood still leaking out of her hand, from where she made a slight cut to be able to fully get this magic going.

It's fine. It's totally cool. Nothing to see here, folks! ]

I guess doing this forever isn't exactly an option. [ Nothing to see here. Not like she's risking some faint corruption herself, just to try and show Mako this. It's cool. ]

[ Mako, being a detective but mostly being worried that this is using up some critical internal resource, does in fact follow her gaze, and immediately frowns, making a motion to grab her hand. ]

Ange! Seriously? If he's gone, let it go.

It's just a little bit of blood!

[ There's definitely some emotion creeping into her voice as she says it. It's not particularly strong - she doesn't sound upset, for one. Instead it sounds more like she's genuinely protesting what he's saying here.

Like she has a good reason to do so. ]

I can handle it. Besides.. [ She stops for a moment, then breathes out through her nose. ] You look so happy when you're looking at this place.

[ So how could she just have stopped the moment the other Mako faded? Especially when it happened so soon after she summoned this image surrounding them in the first place? ]

Me being happy about home for a second isn't worth you bleeding out, Ange!

[ A little dramatic, it isn't that much blood yet, but—it's worry coupled with the sheer effort she's going to to do this for him. Mako still can't make his peace with that, still finds it weird. He's going to owe her such a favor after this—

He has to remind himself that Ange doesn't work like that, and swallows the words. ]

It's good. To see, don't get me wrong, I never thought—but this is more than I thought I'd have. You've done enough.

[ There's a lot she could say to protest here. Like the fact that it's not like she's dying or anything over here. That she can handle a little loss of blood, especially since this magic thankfully didn't require a lot of it.

.. that she just wanted to make him happy for a moment. Because Mako understands her so well, and that makes him feel like an important friend to her.

The moment Ange thinks all of that though, she realises just how pathetic it makes her sound. Her cheeks colour a little, and after an awkward moment of silence, she nods. ]

Yeah. .. Okay.

[ So smooth. Totally not awkward.

(She is being very awkward right now.) ]

At least.. take a last look at it? Then I'll make the magic vanish right after.

[ Mako's worried anger softens at the quiet words. If Ange is getting awkward, it has to mean she's getting in her head about something because they may as well be related for all that they have the exact same way of operating in the world.

Without a word, he nods, and turns to do exactly that as best he can, because he doesn't want this to go to waste and there is a selfish part of him he has to make himself ignore that wants to stay here forever, in this facsimile of his home.

Even the streets are different. Of course they are: everything is, because this is a different world. The stones are wide and flat and pale, making plenty of space for Satomobiles even in this crowded district. Mako traces the lines of the streets up to the shapes of the shops, watching people chatter together and shout at each other in familiar voices. Language he understands, and smells he knows, and animals that aren't strange. Shapes and colors, basic geometric forms, the way things button—

They're all so different, and Mako's never going to see it again, so he really does have to memorize the way people's cuffs fall and the smell of garlic and chili and cooked-down earthy-sweet ash banana, a fruit which doesn't even exist in Trench.

Mako doesn't cry. He hasn't in years, not since he was a child, but his throat is tight as he drags in another breath, and his eyes are red when he turns back to Ange. He clears his throat, feeling raw and exposed and awkward, and watches a kid dart across the street, tailed by a smaller girl, just behind Ange. ]

Okay. I— okay.

[ It's all he can manage around the swell of emotion, an odd bittersweet mix of longing and happiness that he even got to see this. ]

[ At first Ange still feels like she's drowning in her own awkward feelings. In her own thoughts, that are racing through her mind way too quickly, each one followed up by three different ones.

But all that noise inside of her head quiets down when she looks over at Mako. It's a moment before he speaks up, but even then the emotion is already so visible in the other's eyes. His tone only adds to it, making it all even more obvious.

Something about him seems on the verge of crying, even though he doesn't cry. And Ange gets it, recognizes it - that feeling that digs so deeply into you, but that you still can't allow yourself to cry over, especially when someone else is present.

Ange sucks in a breath.

Something about it is kind of terrifying, because it's something she's never done around Mako before. And he's someone who seems to understand her so well that she doesn't just want to break something between them by doing something stupid. But at the same time - if it were her standing there, in Mako's shoes, Ange knows there's one thing she would have wanted, even though she never would have admitted to it. Even though she never would ask for it - even though she perhaps wouldn't have realised it herself in that exact moment.

Ange turns, and then wraps her arms around the guy. It's not a tight hold, nothing too energetic like the many extroverts in their lives, but the embrace still definitely can be felt - though it might be a tad awkward with their height difference. Ange's a short Japanese girl, after all. ]

I'm sorry. [ She says softly, almost more a whisper. And it's hard to say what the 'sorry' applies to here, but maybe it just encompasses all of it in its simplicity. Sorry that this can't last, that Mako even has to feel this way.

Sorry that some things are just so difficult without ever having a good solution.

The illusion fades away around them as Ange still hugs Mako. It grows hazy, and then breaks up into tons of Ange's magical butterflies, which themselves then vanish into the air, leaving them standing right back in that same corner of the festival they were standing at before. ]

[ Mako doesn't get hugged very often by people who aren't his family, as a rule. Bolin's touchy, loves to sling his arm around Mako's shoulders, and Wu practically hangs off him these days. He's gotten used to that, likes the easy closeness of it.

But he doesn't get hugged like this, slow and careful and full of feeling.

It's... it's really nice.

For a bare moment, while the city is still bright around them, Mako goes a little stiff at the unexpected touch, forgets how to use his arms and where his hands should go while his head goes what, what's happening, what is she—

And then she speaks, and he softens all at once, gratitude washing over him in a warm wave even as the city begins to fade. Mako lifts his arms, dropping them quietly over Ange's shoulders, pulling her into a proper hug while her magic flutters up around them like a hundred tiny spirits. They're surrounded by people again, by music that doesn't sound like home and smells that don't smell like it, and Mako should probably let go but no one has ever done anything like that for him and he can't forget that, so he hugs Ange a little tighter and murmurs a quiet thank you into the chilly air. ]

[ There's a brief moment where Ange is terrified that she did the wrong thing. That she crossed some sort of line that she shouldn't have crossed, in her misguided attempt at comforting the other. She's never been good at this sort of thing, after all. Never as much of a natural as the people around her in this place who do it so easily.

But when Mako embraces her as well. Ange can even feel the hold tightening a little, and relief washes over her when she realises she did make the right choice. Even if she was unsure of it.

And the hug itself.. it is kind of nice.

Even though Ange would claim to not be a very touchy person come hell or high water, it's not like she doesn't actually enjoy this sort of thing with the people she cares for. It's the proximity of hearts and feelings that makes the proximity during physical contact better. More meaningful.

It's why she lingers in the hug for a few more moments, not caring whoever can see them in the crowd of people passing them by, before she slowly releases her hold, stepping back to look up at him. ]

.. Do you think you're going to be okay now?

[ Maybe not entirely okay. Bad feelings don't fade so easily.

But perhaps - just a tad better. That much would already make all of this absolutely worth it. ]

[ A loaded question. Mako lets her retreat, stays a little closer than he normally would, awash with the warm glow of gratitude and... actual, real friendship, the kind that used to be so hard to find. Ange is something else, though, and... ]

...yeah. I do.

[ Soft words, full of feeling, echoed by the quiet smile on Mako's face. He lets them linger in the not-quite silence, then looks up at the shout of some vendor across the street and reaches out, casually touching Ange's shoulder. ]

C'mon. I'll get you a cider.

[ Thank you, he doesn't say again, but it's in every word all the same. ]

October 2021 Event Overflow

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