deercountry | (closed)

Entry tags:

(closed)

Who: Lance (

azurestar) and various
What: Catchall for September.
When: During September's event and possibly the TDM.
Where: The Gate, Cellar Door, Willful Machine, River of Regrets

Content Warnings: Probably talk of ptsd, general violence, will add as needed

[This post is for closed starters with anyone who wants a thread with Lance but doesn't have a top level or open post themselves. If you'd like a thread with Lance for September's event or perhaps using some of October's TDM prompts somehow just contact me any of the following ways:

spypigeon, charley#8222 on discord or PM this journal. Thanks!]

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[Hoo boy, his ability isn't that strong nor does he have much control over it to pick up on every little thing Mako feels, but he gets the gist. Mako is suddenly feeling a lot and he's not good at feelings in a way Lance is familiar with. He looks up over at the street, Cellar Door is not as bustling as Willful Machine, especially this far northeast in the district, but it's got enough people milling about that he'd definitely feel exposed in a moment like this.

And Mako is a guy who needs to do things, that much he's figured out. A man of action unused to just sitting in his feelings. So Lance decides to give him something to do away from the exposure of the outside. He reaches out to lightly take Mako's wrist and tug a bit.] Come on, help me brush down Bob in the barn.

[He heads over to the massive horse tied up nearby and unties the thick rope attached to his harness from the post. Then he hands the rope to Mako so he can go over and open the barn doors.]

[ Mako shoots Lance a look that borders on absurdly grateful as he accepts the rope. Being around massive livestock isn't exactly normal for him, but he's spent enough time on Air Temple Island that he just sort of glances at Bob and settles the rope more firmly in his hand.

They're not exactly exposed out here, but there are people passing every now and then. He can't talk about Chloe like that, where anyone could hear the inevitable crack in his voice.

Leading Bob is a bit of a different story. Once Lance has the doors open, Mako looks at the horse again, wondering. ]

You... want to get brushed?

[ Asking the horse is the way to do this, right? He punctuates his question with a quick tug of the rope. ]

[Now that he has the doors open, Lance looks over at Mako talking to Bob and smirks in amusement, crossing his arms. But he doesn't say anything, he talks to the animals all the time, it's just funny how Mako does it like he's genuinely asking. He catches Bob's eye standing behind Mako and out of sight and then gestures with his hand up and down while nodding his head. Bob mirrors the motion, making it look like he's nodding to the question.]

I think he likes you. C'mon, just start walking and he'll follow. He's Shiro's horse, so just think of him as a gentle giant.

[The nod may have been something he helped along, but he can tell from Bob's stance and ears that he does actually like Mako. Once they start moving into the barn, the big horse follows easily. There's a cow in one stall and two more horses in two other stalls. At the far end of the barn where there's another large doorway open to some land is a massive white direwolf sitting guard outside.]

Edited 2021-11-17 23:34 (UTC)

[ It's not like having animals understand him is unusual—Pabu and Naga are way too smart for their own good, and Fritter's had this weird half-sentience since she was born—so Mako takes the nod entirely in stride, actually smiles a little as the horse nods.

Aand then Lance speaks and Mako realizes he has an audience and goes stiff all over again, coughing as his cheeks flush blue. ]

Uh—yeah. He's... definitely giant.

[ He does follow easily, though, so that's nice. Mako isn't exactly skittish around all these large animals but he is entirely too aware of his own footsteps and the sounds they make, all of their combined breath and the strong horse-y smell in here. He leads Bob a little ways in and then pokes his head around the massive horse to look at Lance. ]

There a step-stool for this or something?

[Lance just closed the doors behind them and is busy hooking up ropes to Bob's hackamore to get him ready for some grooming. Then he looks over to Mako around the massive horse then snorts with a smlight grin.]

Yeah. I'll go grab everything we need, one sec.

[While he goes to do that, Lance's tall, sleek brown horse pokes its head out of its stall nearby to snort into Mako's hair… and then start to eat it.]

[ It takes Mako a moment to even notice, distracted as he is by the smell in here and the massiveness of the horse beside him, the hay and dirt floating in the air and settling into his hair, which is being— ]

Auh—

[ Jerking his head away, Mako turns to huff at the slimmer horse, narrowing his eyes. ]

What part of my head looks like dinner to you?

[Lance comes back to the scene with the stool and other tools in his arms and laughs, smirking at Mako.]

Nice cow-lick, Mako. Or, horse-lick? Whatever, it really suits you. [He shrugs and comes over, plopping the items down on the floor and then reaching up to pat his horse's nose.] He thinks so too.

Maybe I'll just start styling my hair like this.

[ He absolutely will not.

But all of this is easier than thinking about Chloe, even if Mako doesn't recognize most of the tools Lance brought over. He edges away from the horse, coming to hover by him instead, awkward and out-of-place in this barn. ]

There a special... horse-brush or something?

[Lance pulls out his Omni and snaps a picture of Mako and his hair, then grins and says in a teasing airy tone:]

Well if you don't, I've immortalized it.

[It's what Chloe would want, and definitely what she would also do. Then he reaches down to the tools and pulls out a large soft brush and hands it and the stool to Mako.]

Just brush with the direction his hair grows, like this- [He demonstrates with his own brush along Bob's neck. Then goes to grab totally different tools.] And while you do that, I'm gonna pick dirt out of his hooves.

[ As soon as he sees the Omni level in front of him Mako's eyes go wide, and a second later he's trying—and failing—to lean around the bulk of the horse to stop but NOPE, picture taken.

Instead he just sort of flails, rights himself, and accepts the stool and the brush with a very sulky kind of huff. ]

Remind me why we're friends?

[ ...he does set the stool down, though, so he can step up onto it with brush in hand. Lance made it look easy. He's brushed Naga before, massive thing that she is. This... can't be harder. And Bob doesn't have giant polar bear dog teeth.

Slowly, Mako reaches up, watching Bob carefully. He hovers with the brush for a moment, then lowers it and drags it along Bob's massive flank.

So far so good! ]

[Lance grins mischievously and tucks his omni safely away.]

Because you love my sparkling personality~

[And he watches Mako get started on brushing Bob for a moment before heading over to pick up the horse's front leg nearby and start picking mud out of his hoof. The horse is probably the chillest in the universe and just placidly stands there as they groom him. After a moment, Lance eases back to where they started.]

Y'know. Chloe and I used to film memes on our fluids. How much you wanna bet she'd have five meme ideas ready to go the moment she saw the picture I just took of your new horse lick? [There's a pained and sorrowful edge to his voice, but it's also nice to remember the good stuff]

She'd have at least seven.

[ Mako says it without even thinking, snorting quietly as he drags the brush carefully along Bob's back. Chloe would've probably given him a new nickname or something on top of it all, called him that forever just to annoy him.

It's easy to see, after a second, what Lance is doing. Mako brushes at a bit of dirt, glad the bulk of Bob's body hides his face for the most part. It hurts to think about her, and it shouldn't, because it isn't like Mako hasn't lost people over and over again. ]

And she'd probably send them one by one over a week or something. Just to be annoying.

[Lance chuckles lightly as he continues to pick mud and debris out of the massive hoof. He locates a pebble caught in Bob's shoe and his tongue sticks out the side of his mouth as he works at dislodging it.

When Chloe disappeared from Deerington, he was still dealing with losing Keith, and around that time is… when he started dying more frequently. That's not a coincidence, though he'd certainly say it was. A lot of other terrible things were happening as well, as that's how it goes in Deerington, and he just… shut down. Lost the will to feel or move forward or fight as hard. And he hasn't fully connected with those feelings since, which makes this subject easier for him in a way.

He dislodges the pebble finally and lets out a breath, putting Bob's foot down and then moving to the next.] Memes were her love language, man. She gave me this Pepe painting for Christmas… or was it my birthday? Anyway, I've got it up in the loft, along with all the other meme gifts she put together over the years. So if she was sending you memes that often, you might as well tattoo your forehead with 'Chloe Approved'.

That's a pretty hard tattoo to get.

[ Mako stops brushing, trying not to think about that stupid kitchen or their talk in the library or any of the hundreds of memes she sent him. It's stupid to get choked up over jokes, so he isn't going to do it. ]

You and Chloe were... really close. Right?

[Lance shrugs about the tattoo. It could be henna for a prank, that might be funny. But his thoughts on that are interrupted when Mako asks him that. It feels like there's a shift of some kind, and he picks out the last of the mud on the hoof in his hands and stands to look over at Mako with a quizzical brow raised.]

Yeah, you could say that. Why?

[ You could say that. Mako drags the brush over the bulk of Bob's flank, staring down at the fur. ]

Do you think she'd hate this? Getting all sentimental about her?

[Well, that has him delving a bit deeper into some thoughts and feelings he'd locked away for a long time. Not enough to get him falling apart, but enough to give him pause.]

She'd act like she hates it. But… [He shakes his head as his voice dips momentarily when he thinks about what she went "home" to. Grief grips his chest and his voice goes quieter.] She'd secretly love it…

...yeah.

[ Mako's voice is barely above a breath. ]

I miss her.

[Suddenly, there's a lump in his throat and that vice on his ribs is cracking them and crushing his heart. He doesn't reply right away and after a pause he has to shakily turn away and wipe at his face.]

Sorry, uh- got some barn dust. Lots- lots of dust here…

[Yes, that's completely believable when he sounds like he's about to crack apart into a million pieces. He swallows and just tensely stands there trying to keep his shit together.]

[ Mako can barely press on that particular bruise himself and he certainly isn't going to do the same thing to Lance, not when they're both moments from cracking. He looks away, drags the brush along Bob's fur in the exact same spot he's been brushing this whole time, and lets the moment settle with the dust in the barn. ]

She'd kick our asses for this whole conversation.

[Too late, that bruise has been pressed and it's like opening the floodgates. He nods distractedly and his shoulders hunch as his hands come across his middle to grip at his elbows. A glow starts to form under his clothes, and he lets out a shuddered breath.]

I promised her… I'd save her. That I'd bring her home with me and Shiro and…

[And Allura and Keith. He swallows and tries to hold the rest of the pain back, hops off that track, but it might be fruitless. This is months and months of suppressed grief.]

A-anyway… that's why I didn't leave the dream. The lighthouses were right there, and… what if she came back somehow, y'know?

You wanted to be there in case she did.

[ Mako fills in tonelessly. It's not hard to guess, the way Lance is hunching down, the pain in his voice, what he knows about Lance as a person.

He'd made a different choice, and he still isn't sure how to feel about it. ]

[Lance nods. Yes, more or less that's what he wanted.]

Well, a promise is a promise.

[It felt wrong to leave without her. And admittedly, it wasn't the only reason for his hesitation.]

But also... I'm not who I used to be. [Not the person his family remembers. He lets out a shuddered breath, tries to shake it all off. Not very successfully, he's still a glow worm.] It doesn't matter, not like we can go back and change anything, right?

I think it matters.

[ Mako's voice is quiet but full of feeling. He doesn't feel like himself either, not entirely. He wonders, sometimes, what Beifong would think about him if she washed up here. Would she recognize him? ]

I'm not who I used to be, either. This place... really changes you.

[He's quiet for a long moment and then he lets out a shuddered breath and nods. His hands come up to slap a bit at his face and get control over his damn stupid emotions and the glow they pull out from his powers. Then he turns back around to face Mako, though he doesn't meet his eyes and looks to Bob, assessing what else he can busy his own hands with.]

…Is that why you came here? Instead of going back home, I mean.

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