walk in the way of my soft resurrection // OPEN

[thisislife]

Who: Lexi Howard and you?
What: Event shenanigans
When: April 8th-15th
Where: Gaze, mostly

Content Warnings: possible underage drinking, hypnosis, hopelessness, monsters, potential for instant beasthood, corruption, draining of soul, spoilers for Season 2 of Euphoria

Comments

Migration of Moonlit Butterflies (CW: corruption likely)

[thisislife]

At first, Lexi wasn't really sure what to make of the giant, green butterflies. She'd frequently come home from school or the library to find one perched on the top of her house. There was no denying that they were beautiful, but. She's watched too many bad monster movies to trust that the butterflies were completely harmless (thank you Rue's dad and his MST3K DVD sets).

For example, what would happen if/when they needed to reproduce? She didn't know much about butterfly reproduction, but she knew she didn't want eggs nestled in her backyard, that would be a pain in the ass to clean up after.

So she turned to the other person eyeing the butterfly on top of her house and said, "Is this something we're supposed to get used to? Giant Mothra butterflies just kind of there? Chilling in my backyard? I mean, they're not...that interesting. Are they?"

((OOC: feel free to snap her out of it or try to do something about it later on when she's stuck and corrupting rapidly))

[democratically]

She had been at the School of Mutter, seeking to learn more about it. It was an interesting place and Padmé knew that she would be back there again, although perhaps when these butterflies went away. They hadn't been aggressive or even violent, but there as something a little ominous about them.

She'd been on her way to the lamp post when a familiar female had caught her attention. Pausing, Padmé altered her path to come toward Lexi. Her gaze shifted up, noting the butterfly that she was referring to, although she had no idea what a Mothra was, let alone a giant one. "So long as all they are doing is just sitting there... Perhaps they are like the hound-like creatures that ate blood last month?"

[thisislife]

Too many Japanese monster movies. She kept trying to remind herself that they were exactly like weird Japanese movies and the fact that they didn't seem to be going anywhere soon also prickled along her spine. There was something wrong about them. Right?

"Hi, Padmé. Weird, aren't they? And I'd be afraid of them eating blood, they're so big they could probably drain a person and still have room for dessert." But at least the spell of them was broken, just in time before Lexi could go under. So she made shoo!ing noises at the butterfly. "My back yard isn't your home base, so back to the moon or something!"

[democratically]

She hadn't been thinking about them draining people, but she was now. Yet they looked dainty enough, even if large. Padmé would hope if they did turn aggressive, they would easily be driven away.

Padmé gave a little twitch of her lips, watching as Lexi made a motion toward the butterfly creature. It didn't seem bothered by her motions though. "I think it may require a bit more convincing..."

[thisislife]

Lexi has seen way too many horror movies and spooky ghost encounter reality shows thanks to Rue when they were young, though these seemed more like something out of a kaiju movie. She figured that at least it wasn't Godzilla, though judging from everything she wouldn't be surprised if Godzilla eventually did show up.

A little frown line formed between her brows. "Then, now what? I don't wanna do something like throw rocks at it, that seems mean."

[democratically]

"A broom?" Padmé wasn't really one to ask. So long as it wasn't bothering her, she wouldn't do anything with it. Not that it truly reminded her of the Zillo beast, and she hadn't seen people being cruel to the creatures. "Maybe wave it a little back and forth near it, and it will get the message to leave?"

(CW: underage revenge porn)

[thisislife]

"Hmm. There's a--an off-brand swiffer in my house? That could work, it's even softer than a broom's bristles. I don't want to hurt it," she says, painfully earnest. But it was truthful earnestness. Okay, maybe her play didn't necessarily cast her older sister in the most positive light, but if Cassie knew how many guys had approached her in the halls with pictures of her sister in...compromising positions and asked her for the same, well. One could hardly blame her. Right?

[democratically]

Padmé has no idea what a swiffer is, but assumes it is something like a brook. Even a rake or something that might distract it and make it take off. Padmé can't say she really paid too much attention. Usually butterflies or moths or flying bugs took off. "I think something that would just make it decide it no longer wanted to remain. Maybe even flapping a towel around it?"

[thisislife]

Lexi wishes she didn't know what a swiffer was. She spent way too much time with them back home because Cassie wouldn't know how to dust if Lexi gave her written instructions. Which she'd done. Cassie still claimed to not understand.

"A towel! Yeah, that should work, I have plenty of those. Be right back!" And she disappeared into the front door of her garish yellow and pink house.

And emerges with a beach towel which is a lie. She likes far more than six people here. Back home? That was asking a lot. But she starts flapping the beach towel at the butterfly which gives her a blasé expression, then flew away apparently on its own.

"...so. Um. Would you like to come in for tea? I have at least twenty kinds."

Wonderkind (CW: drug dealers, death, dysfunctional family, cancer, Season 2 Spoilers)

[thisislife]

Sure, she'd heard that people had been able to collect stuff from their worlds. Had even heard that the portals could send monsters out from the other side. Weird, but nothing really to write home about.

She wasn't expecting anything from home because she didn't give much of a shit about personal possessions, she'd been resigned to sharing a room with Cassie and for most of Lexi's belongings to eventually become Cassie's belongings to really put much value on things in their shared bedroom.

What she hadn't been expecting was to glance into one of those portals and see:

A) Cassie, who was giving Lexi an absolutely murderous glare, red-faced with rage.

or

B) Rue, looking more like herself than she had years, probably since Rue got the news of her father's cancer, smiling shyly

cw: head injury, mention of demonic possession

[possessum]

Peter hasn't really been paying too much focus to the portal rumours floating around. It's not that it doesn't sound like a really big deal, but he's had other things to worry about: namely his girlfriend progressively growing more and more Corrupted. Luna's become strange and cold and aggressive, not to mention that she's also physically changing more every day. His days are mostly spent desperately trying to follow her around the city to make sure she doesn't get hurt. ....Though she's largely hurting other people, blasting them with magic.

Peter's stress levels are generally Really Fucking High, but this month might just be taking the cake. The demon king that's possessing him is at least trying to keep Peter from getting Corrupted in the form of trying to calm his host down and keep him mildly drugged with calming demon-fueled hallucinations, but it also means that it drains Peter's energy and often has him passing out with no warning.

....Which is what happened a few hours ago. Peter wakes up somewhere in the city, blinking in hazy-eyed confusion. The boy pushes himself up off the cobblestone and immediately groans in pain, reaching a hand up to his temple, where a nasty blood-crusted gash suggests he hit his head pretty hard when he passed out. Fuck...

Peter blearily looks around, staggering a bit before he manages to actually start walking, heading down some random street. He has no idea where he is; everything's all dark, and he can barely think straight, and that's when he sees someone moving up ahead. Blinking, Peter realises he recognises her as the girl from the jungle. Latching onto that familiarity, he's heading her way when suddenly something's opening up close to her, and Peter catches sight of a blonde girl who looks absolutely murderous.

He gasps, flinching back a bit. The girl in the portal is a lot younger than his mother, but the expression... the rage.... that's familiar. So familiar it makes his throat feet too tight, and his anxiety's spiking. Not only for himself, but for Lexi, too. Is she in danger? Peter moves closer to Lexi, eyeing the girl in the portal with a mixture of fear and confusion. What the fuck—

"Hey— What's...what's happening?"

cw: head injury, mention of demonic possession, murderous intent

[thisislife]

That would definitely take top priority, making sure that one's girlfriend was safe, even though Lexi was still iffy on the exact details of corruption. She'd heard it being used in regard to someone else acting strangely, but she'd been fortunate enough to not run into anyone that was happening to.

So far, anyway. This was only her second month.

That sounded horrifying. Possession is only a story where she's from, stuff like watching The Exorcist while sleeping over at Rue's house as a kid. That had been scary enough, but to have it be a reality? Unheard of. But it would be another reminder that Lexi was in way over her head.

Murderous was a kind way of putting it. Like if Cassie could get her hands on her Lexi, they'd have to hide the knives again because she's only heard of people getting that angry in the tv shows about grisly crimes their mother liked to watch.

But the gasp draws her attention and she recognizes him as the guy who accidentally tripped over her in the mud. Lexi tried to smile at him, but it was faltering at best, her attention pulled back in at Cassie. But she didn't look like the Cassie Lexi knew. For one thing, her hair had been flat-ironed straight, her make-up was smeared but seemed heavier than what Cassie usually preferred.

Before Lexi could answer Peter, the Cassie in the portal spat out "You little bitch. How could you? Huh? What gave you the fucking right to humiliate me in front of everyone"!?"

[possessum]

Peter has no idea what to expect here, but it becomes immediately clear that the furious young woman inside the portal knows Lexi. And suddenly there's those venomous words, and as much as Peter wants to run away from someone who's screaming and shouting so angrily (it's what terrifies him the most, even after all this time; he sees his mother there snapping at him like she wanted to bite his head off)... he's not going to leave the other girl there alone. Not with this person who looks like she wants to fucking kill her.

"Hey. Maybe you should just— just lay off a bit, huh?"

He looks kind of terrified as he says it to Cassie, but he's still going to try to defend the poor girl who's getting blessed out, and even lifts an arm slightly in front of Lexi, like he's trying to shield her a little. He's worried the blonde is going to reach right through and strangle her or something.

Head turning back to face Lexi, Peter's eyes are wide. "You... you know her?"

[thisislife]

Lexi's eyes are as huge as dinner plates as she looks at Cassie and tries to stammer out a response. "It was--I was--to show contrast? But. How do know?" That was the huge question. She wasn't technically even finished writing the play and had only offered to let Rue see it ahead of time because of how central Rue was to the themes.

When Peter speaks, Cassie snarled "How about you mind your own fucking business?" Lexi shot Peter a humiliated, apologetic look. She was just about shaking from the fear and humiliation she was feeling.

And she appreciates Peter trying to help more than she can say. Cassie had been the favorite of everyone she knew, including their parents, but this Cassie...she knew something weird was going on and it seemed like Cassie assumed Lexi knew.

Lexi cleared her throat and felt herself blush. "She's, uh. My older sister."

[possessum]

Peter flinches as that rage turns towards him, directed in full force for that brief moment. There's a wince like he's been hit, and his heart's pattering away like a frightened animal, anxiety tipping dangerously close to panic. He can't take being snarled at like that, it's too familiar, and he still remembers pleading desperately with his mom to stop, please stop, please please please—

When people are that angry, they don't even look human anymore. Their eyes are too wide, their teeth exposed too much. His mom seemed like some animal. The girl in the portal looks like that, like something more wild than a person, and he's too afraid to even respond back to her.

He's nudging closer to Lexi by instinct, but not behind her. No, he's still staying slightly in front of the other teen. Cassie would have to move him aside to get to Lexi.

"Your sister...?" Oh, fuck. He's still ogling the blonde girl, and swallows hard. While he's never seen a portal like this before, he's no stranger to the concept of this place forcing you to interact with people from your past. Usually, it means something has to be resolved before they'll go away.

"Why's she so mad?"

[thisislife]

Cassie wasn't just mad, she looked like she'd been in a fight, blonde hair messy and eye make-up smeared. But what the hell would make Cassie get into a physical fight? The very idea was mind-boggling. Though, she had something more to take care of and that was making sure Peter didn't bear the brunt of her sister's rage. "C'mon, Cass, leave him alone. He didn't do anything, so don't take it out on him. Okay?"

That made Cassie's attention switch back to Lexi. "Oh, now you're being protective of people?" Cassie laughed bitterly. "You should have thought of that earlier. You should have thought maybe my big sister didn't deserve to be embarrassed in front of the whole world! You act like you've had it so rough, but let's face it! If it wasn't for my friends, you wouldn't have any friends at all!"

Lexi tries to usher Peter behind her as she felt the color drain from her face. She had something of an idea of what Cassie might be referring to and it wasn't good. She didn't want Peter to have to take the brunt of an enraged Cassie, one who Lexi had no idea what she was capable of. She'd never seen Cassie like this.

"I...have an idea. And it's not good." She closed her eyes for a long moment. "Something I'd been writing. A play. I hadn't wanted to hurt her, all I wanted to do was tell the truth." And sometimes, the truth hurt.

[possessum]

Peter's mouth shuts again for a long moment as he watches the exchange between the two sisters. He never would've guessed they were related, just from first glance. It's... a lot like him and his sister, actually. He and Charlie couldn't have looked more different, with his dark hair and eyes, and her blonde hair and blue eyes. The way she looked so much more like Mom than he ever had.

When he was little, and wished he had different parents, sometimes he'd pretend like he was adopted.

He lets himself be scooted a bit behind Lexi, but he's not about to abandon her. And there's a wince at Cassie's words about not having friends: words meant to sting her sister. It should be hard to believe family can talk that way to each other, but... Peter knows better than that. Family's the people who can hurt you the most of all.

He looks back at Lexi, eyes wide. His voice instinctively lowers into a whisper, trying as hard as he can to keep his words between him and Lexi. Some attempt to not further enrage the blonde girl. "You wrote a play? About her?" And it had embarrassed her, it seems. Yeah, he's definitely in the middle of some major family drama, here. Peter swallows hard, nervous.

"What you wrote couldn't have been.... that bad, could it?" He ventures. Cassie looks ten seconds away from a nervous breakdown. ....Actually, maybe she's already had one?? Did Lexi's play really do all this?

From Within and Without

[thisislife]

Lexi was walking along her usual path to the School of Mutter when she caught a glimpse of herself out of the corner of her eye. She assumed that she had she'd merely caught a glimpse of herself in a nearby mirror and that was what explained the being walking alongside her, keeping pace with her every movement, turning its head to "look" at her when Lexi turned her head to look at it.

Okay. She'd grown up with Stranger Danger, but she couldn't recall a single grade school class telling her what to do with a blank-faced clone of her. Probably kick it in the crotch, then run.

So that's what Lexi did, she spun in place to face the other her and the other her did the same. Lexi drew her leg back as far as she could and kicked the creature in the crotch as hard as she could---

---only for pain to explode in her own body, dropping on the spot and moaning in pain. And the other her collapsed in the exact same pose, looking at her with its blank, expressionless face.

She did her best to try to scoot backwards, saying "No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no," then yelling for help at the top of her lungs.

Whatever it was kept scooting towards her.

[retsuden]

Sasuke has been mostly running around Trench to try and fight the monsters that have been coming in through the portals. It's kept him on alert enough even from the usual beasts that it's impossible for him to miss the scream for help. Where he had once been the sort to consider it not his problem, Sasuke now found these sorts of things impossible to ignore.

He's seen the Tether's before by now, but they're still always a challenge for him. He's only really good at fighting his enemies, not comforting others. He has to resist the urge to stab the thing, knowing it would only kill Lexi. Instead, he makes sure to jump over the Tether that's crawling towards her and crouch down in front of her, putting a hand on her shoulder to stop her from continuing to move.

"Don't be afraid." With his monotone, it's almost more of an order than a comfort, but he tried okay.

[thisislife]

Smart of him. Way smarter than her situation, which was mostly going from the school to the library and back again. She was studying alchemy, which she loved. It was the greatest cross between chemistry and magic she could think of and in this world? It was possible. It was real. Unlike in Ye Olden Dayes where King James I would commission a new version of the Bible on one side of the castle and have alchemists try to turn his pee into gold on the other.

Whatever. She was occupying herself with minutiae, as usual.

This was the first time she'd heard of or seen a tether. So she would like to be forgiven for apparently choosing the worst way possible to try and take it down. It was through sheer force of will that she wasn't crying from the pain.

So when Sasuke showed up, Lexi thanked every god in whatever cosmos may exist for his presence. She was technically an atheist, but him showing up and helping her had to count for thanking some kind of higher power?

And she stopped scooting at his hand on her shoulder. And when he speaks, Lexi listens. "I won't be." She didn't want to embarrass herself more in front of her sensei.

[retsuden]

"Good."

Sasuke's giving her a once over to see whether or not she unintentionally inflicted any visible injuries to herself in fighting off the Tether, and while she's not showing any outward bleeding, it's not too difficult for him to realize she's in pain from something. He frowns a little, wishing he was better at medical ninjutsu, but... Well. He specialized in destroying things, not fixing them.

His hand doesn't leave his shoulder as he looks back to the Tether and then returns his gaze to Lexi. "From what I've gathered, that thing is apart of ourselves. A dark part, clearly, but it means attacking it is useless. Which I think you learned." He gives her shoulder a gentle squeeze before moving his hand to her own. It's something of a more gentle touch, which he's learned (aka been told after not doing it for years) can usually help to put people more at ease.

"I know you've only been here a short time. Has corruption been explained to you?"

(CW: alcoholism)

[thisislife]

Not...really? Only the pain to her unmentionables which she is so not going to bring up in front of him. At some point in the near(?) future, she'd be feeling not like she took a chainsaw to herself and she's really looking forward to it. She's still embarrassed that Sasuke had to find her like this and will likely carry that embarrassment to her grave. But if she made a list of every cringe thing she'd ever done, there wouldn't be time to get away from the whatever it was.

"A--a dark part. Oh, um. Does being really, really, really jealous of my older sister count?" Lexi figured it would, she knew that both of her parents had always favored the effortlessly beautiful and popular Cassie for as long as Lexi could remember.

Even after her dad...kind of went nowhere good fast, he still favored Cassie over her. Lexi could (and had) gotten straight As during her entire time at school and the best she could hope for was an "oh, that's nice," quickly forgotten in the haze of alcohol. But Sasuke's hand reassures her. Things were going to be okay. Right?

"...not exactly? I know that it's--it's a thing, but no one explained the science behind it."

[retsuden]

If that's the darkest thing about her, Sasuke almost envies her. But he supposes that it's unfair to think of it in such a way, when most people even in his world rarely had things much darker inside themselves. He was glad it was the thing that came to mind for her rather than some deep fear of being a monster inside all along.

"I know my jealousy of my elder brother is certainly apart of my own darkness," he says with only a small hint of amusement to it. "But I think this might be something beyond just our dark feelings and more like the shadow of our beings. An evil twin, if that's easier to picture."

He makes sure to not let go of her hand, even though he's sure the Tether hasn't particularly stopped its advances. If anything, he can act as a barrier, as he's fairly certain it can't move through a solid object. Though God knows he's been wrong before.

"I'm not an expert, but corruption comes from the way this world impacts us. It's something that slowly overtakes us because of the horrors we see here, feeding off of our anger, insecurities, and fears. It's a physical ailment, not just a mental one. That thing... plays some role in rapid corruption. I've seen it happen, but I've also seen it stopped."

He gives her hand a small squeeze. Touch had helped Naruto and he hoped that it would help here, too. Maybe this time without him fucking it up by being unintentionally cruel in his comforting techniques sometimes.

"Why are you jealous of your sister?"

(CW: alcoholism)

[thisislife]

She wasn't sure she should be envied. She'd been jealous of Cassie her entire life for being blonde and beautiful, loved by everyone who met her, who could have any guy she wanted, just by glancing at him. Lexi was the tall, gangly, awkward one in comparison and she couldn't hope to compete. Even though she'd wanted to.

The more and more outgoing and beautiful Cassie got, the more friends she'd made, the further Lexi had retreated into a shell of her own mind. There, she could try to tell herself that popularity didn't matter and beauty didn't last forever, but those were future things and did nothing to help the present.

And Lexi looked at Sasuke with wide eyes. "You have an older brother?" She couldn't imagine that. Sasuke was so cool and seemed so put together, in comparison to her. But, the mention of an evil twin earned a small chuckle. "Great. Like something out of my mom's soap operas. But if anyone gets amnesia, they're trying too hard. But...all my life, it's always been Cassie."

Lexi was trying to not look at the tether. Sort of like how in a horror movie, the victim didn't try to look at Freddy or Jason or Michael Myers, as if that would save them. But she'd feel guilty beyond words if he sacrificed himself for her.

Though, that explanation made sense. At least in a Trench sense. It seemed like every time something weird happened, she was faced with her insecurities and neuroses and she had plenty of both. "...oh. So it's not necessarily my fault? Just my brain doing bad things because of bad stimuli? 'Cause that's kind of a subconscious thing, one I don't have control of yet. And I--I really, really don't wanna be corrupted." Though, she suspected that she really didn't have a say in it, that it would sneak up on her eventually."

She squeezed his hand back. Touching and hugging hadn't been big things in the Howard family, not since dad had left and mom climbed into the bottom of a wine bottle.

Lexi had to clear her throat before she could try to speak. "Ever see one of those girls that's just so damn beautiful, she makes all of the other girls look like nothing? The kind of girl who gets all of the attention, all of the focus, all of the praise? That's--that's my sister, Cassie. And there are these little things she does sometimes, I can't tell if she's being mean on purpose or if it comes out as mean to me. She...I can't compete with her."

[retsuden]

He smiles a little sadly at her question, his gaze averting downward for a moment. "Had," he corrects quietly, before looking back up at her. "He died a few years ago." It's still painful to think about, but at least he's getting a bit better at saying it in this place. If Trench has done one thing, it's get him to own up to the pain in his past a little more freely so that the city can't use it against him as readily.

Sasuke nods at what she takes from his explanation of corruption, because she's right. It isn't her fault. "I can't promise you it will never happen, this place likely will always find a way to try, but... You can get more control of it the more confident you become in yourself. The more you stop comparing yourself to others. Like Cassie."

God bless that name for not having a bunch of letters in it he can't pronounce so he doesn't mess it up.

"Itachi was like that too. My father always focused on him and made me feel like I would never be as strong as he was. For a long time, I thought he hated me, and I dedicated far too much of my time and energy to trying to be better than him. But you don't have to compete with them. You're your own person with your own talents and your own strengths. The people who really matter will give you the focus and encouragement you deserve. Forget about everyone who doesn't."

He's hoping that some of the support he's given here will weaken the Tether, because otherwise he'll feel like an idiot for opening up so much later. He feels like he sounds like he's trying to be Naruto and failing spectacularly, but no one can say he didn't try.