open | homesickness

[undermoonlight]

Who: undermoonlight + Open
What: Atsushi explores and misses Yokohama
When: Sept 1st - 6th
Where: Boardwalk, Odd End, & Earworm

Content Warnings: N/A for this log.



A | The Boardwalk

[Out of reach, purposefully ignored, is a thought: "This is pointless. They're not coming here."

But Atsushi comes back to the Boardwalk anyway. He's figured out by now that new squids won't be appearing on the shores and no new faces will be arriving, but he still wants them to. He's spent a few hours walking up and down the beach in search of familiar items, but nothing from Yokohama has washed up on shore.

When he goes back to the boardwalk, hoping to clear his head, he only finds himself more distracted. Male presenting characters with brown hair might hear a startled Atsushi walk up behind them and call out hopefully, only to be quite disappointed when they turn around. Otherwise, characters may notice him calling out to a native;]

Dazai-san? Is that you-- oh. [He goes from reaching out his hand to lowering it. Disappointed. Sometimes he'll do this to a non-sleeper and watch them walk away afterward. In these cases, Atsushi gives them a few seconds to get away. Then he clenches his fist and lowers his head; Guilty, ashamed, and frustrated all at once.]

Stop it. They aren't coming.

B | Cassandra District - Odd End

[Missing Yokohama makes Atsushi want to be a proper apprentice. He's been poking into shops for a while now in search of a blank notebook to write notes in, and Odd End feels hopeful. The things here don't cater to the uncomfortable blood magic that seems to be everywhere else.

Some of the odds and ends even seem charming at first glance. He doesn't recognize the occult value for the candles or plants, but he does think they look interesting. Usagi might like that candle and Makoto likes plants, doesn't she? But as soon as he crosses paths with someone else, Atsushi withdraws his hands and awkwardly tries to move away.]

Sorry! Am I in your way? I don't really need that, so if you want it then go for it?

C | Cellar Door Distract - Passing Earworm

[After some wandering, Atsushi ends up in the Cellar Door district. It feels nicer than the rest of the Trench (which isn't saying much,) and the atmosphere change does help him relax. Enough so that he's able to notice the Earworm and look at the sign curiously.]

They had places like these in Yokohama... Clubs? [He stands awkwardly there for a moment longer. Atsushi never had time for this sort of thing in Yokohama. His only experiences with them are judgmental ones, where he thinks they're indecent and vulgar. But compared to the hellhole that is the Trench, the Earworm looks like a nice place to visit. It looks like a normal place for someone his age to go.

After getting a look from the bouncer, Atsushi steps away in a hurry. Shaking his head and scolding himself aloud;]

It's too noisy. I won't get any work done in a place like that. [But he does look over his shoulder as he tries to walk away. And nearly collides into someone as a result;] Ack- Sorry!!

Comments

c.

[deathrespect]

( Samatoki feels his heart jump when he hears Yokohama from the kid who nearly collides into him. He's stopped fully, taking a step back and holding a hand up. )

You're fine. Did you say Yokohama? Or am I hallucinating.

[undermoonlight]

[Hearing the name of his home, Atsushi’s eyes widen. Many people have recognized the city, but few take interest in it.

He nods.]

Yes, Yokohama, Japan. Have you heard of it..?

[deathrespect]

Heard of it? I used to run that shit, b.

( He narrows his eyes a little, pupils slit and ringed with red, horns tall. )

I kicked it there with my division for a while until I got ... pulled away elsewhere. You from there?

[undermoonlight]

Run it..?

[Atsushi’s first thought is that sounds like something that the Port Mafia might say. Or a similarly powerful gang.]

Yeah, I live- lived there. Though I haven’t been back in a year. My name is Atsushi Nakajima.

[deathrespect]

Yeah, I was wakagashira for a yakuza family but my real pride was the rap division I was part of.

( Not far off, honestly. )

I'm Samatoki Aohitsugi. Does the name Mad Trigger Crew mean anything to you?

A. The Boardwalk

[thunderingcourage]

There were still people showing up, some that were coming from Deerington and others were coming from their homes which Makoto had been surprised by. She wasn't sure why new people would continue to be pulled in after everything. But that was something for another time, she'd come back to the boardwalk to pick up the hair tie she'd talked to one woman about, and to pick up a few other small things for the house.

She knew that Atsushi had still been trying to settle in, adjusting to the time that had been lost, so Makoto tried to give him space. But when she caught a glimpse of him talking to a brown haired boy, and then clenched his first and looked down she had to ask.

Walking up she stopped a few feet away holding her hands in front of her.

"What's wrong? Is there someone you're looking for?"

[undermoonlight]

Hearing Makoto does help to snap Atsushi out of his self hatred. He lifts his head to look at her, noticing that she seems to be collecting things for the house.

Shouldn’t he be doing that?

Why isn’t he helping with the house?

He needs to stop thinking about Yokohama…

He slowly unclenches his fist, trying to appear relaxed. He needs to focus on the present, and yet…

“Mm. Sorry. I thought I recognized someone.” Atsushi sighs. This is Makoto. He should be more open with her, right?

Yet he’s quick to try to brush any concern for him away, “Did you find what you needed? Need a hand?”

[thunderingcourage]

It had been something for herself more than the house really, something to hopefully make her feel a bit more like herself. He'd probably noticed that since arriving Makoto's hair had actually been down a lot more than it usually was.

"I was just looking for this. And found a few other cute things too."

She held out the hair tie with the rose that she had found when she first arrived, at a stand that Usagi had pointed out to her. Makoto hadn't had anything to trade for it, and so far it had been a little difficult for her to get much. After all vilebloods weren't the most welcome from what she had heard. That she was a rotted soul.

"If you could help me hold it for just a second while I put it in place."

Lifting her hair a little she looked at Atsushi, she was happy to see him but he seemed distracted, like there was something missing.

"Who was it you thought you saw?"

[undermoonlight]

Seeing the rose on the hair tie immediately makes him think of her. Roses suit her image so well and he thinks of her every time that he sees them.

Atsushi nods, smiling faintly, and reaches to take the hair tie. He even takes a step closer, offering to help with her hair like he would for Usagi.

“Mm. I haven’t seen your hair up in a while, huh..? It looks cute down.” Oh wait. Said too much. He can feel his cheeks redden.

“Uh- Dazai-san… he’s the one who saved me. But I should have known he wouldn’t get caught up in something like this.” Dazai was so smart. If he came, they would get out of Deerington in no time—

Except they’ve already gotten out, and look how far that got them.

A

[entreats]

[ .. what a sad display, Ange thinks.

But it's sad in a way that makes her feel sympathetic. It's obvious what's going on here, after all. Atsushi did end up here somehow, but apparently no one else from his home - or perhaps just not the people he wanted to see most here.

So after watching him try to call out a few times like that to various natives, Ange ends up just approaching Atsushi. She can't really just watch this go on for longer. ]

Do you really miss them that much..?

[ Sure, there are a lot of other things Ange could say. Like properly greeting Atsushi, for once. But in the face of this situation, she can't help but be more direct about the main matter first. ]

[undermoonlight]

[Atsushi flinches at the sound of her voice. She's a familiar face, sure, but she's someone from Deerington. His regrets and anxieties bubble beneath the surface as he lifts his gaze to meet her. To Atsushi, it feels like he only saw Ange a few days ago. He understands now that to others, it's been months since he was left.]

Does it seem that way?

[He doesn't know if he misses Dazai and the rest of the Agency. Atsushi only spent a few months in Yokohama, compared to over a year in Deerington. He should feel more at home with Ange and the others, and yet...]

It would be nice to see them again, yeah. [sighing, because he knows he probably won't.] But it's good to see you, Ange. How are you doing? I heard that it's been a while.

[entreats]

[ At least she's kind enough to not answer his initial question. It's so obvious that even just saying 'yes' would be kind of sad.

So instead Ange focuses on the rest of what he says, her head dipping into a nod. ]

Yeah, it's been.. a long time. [ She can't even remember what the last time was that she spoke to Atsushi. It must have been so long before they ended up here instead. And yet he was brought here too - just like the rest of them. ] And.. I guess that means you didn't choose to go here, the way the rest of us did.

[undermoonlight]

Choose to be here? What do you mean? Did you-- Did others get to choose to go back... [Back home is what he wanted to say, but the words fizzle out on his tongue.

Where even is his home? Yokohama feels so far away. Sometimes he can't even remember the route from his apartment to the Agency. He doesn't remember the faces of some of the Agency staff anymore. He's afraid he's forgotten even more. But does he really want to think of the horrific town they were in before as home?

Atsushi tries to push those thoughts aside and focus on Ange. Concerned now as he realizes what her choice to stay implies.]

... You stayed? Why? Did things get better over there? [x to doubt.]

A

[onerthes]

It doesn't hurt to look.

[There was a familiar voice just behind him. Someone walked up, the familiar three eyes looking at him quietly while Vira-Lorr came closer. She hadn't heard what he'd said perfectly, but the look of disappointment... she had felt it over and over again.]

Are you looking for a friend?

[undermoonlight]

[Atsushi flinches in surprise before turning to look over his shoulder. He feels guilty for being found in this state.]

Yeah. My mentor.

[His shoulders sink,] Are you looking for anyone? I guess people don't wash up on shore every day, so no one new is coming...

[onerthes]

Several... I have many from the nightmare who worry me, so I feel the urge to visit the beach often. Hopefully you are able to find your mentor soon.

[She offered him a warm smile, walking up next to him and sighing sadly. There was a whole list of people who she wanted to see again, or at least know that they were safe.]

I think, this month, checking occasionally isn't bad. We can be sure that it really is cyclical, like it was before. Yes?

[Good excuse, no?]

[undermoonlight]

That's true... Can't know for sure yet.

[Even if they both probably know it won't happen.

Atsushi laughs lightly at the mention of his mentor. He doesn't have the heart to say that he looked for the past year he was in the nightmare. His hopes of seeing Dazai again are not very high.]

I'm sorry about everything. I was supposed to help you all get out of that nightmare, but instead... I was pretty useless, huh? Are you okay?

B.

[onekindsoul]

[Ruby was honestly just browsing when she crossed paths with Atsushi at first she didn't recognize the nervous energy that he gave off and just awkwardly sort of stepped to the side into his path as she made an attempt to move around him.]

Oh- No. Don't worry about it. It's my fault!

[And she blinks once. The mechanical shutter of her prosthetic eye clicking as it makes the motion.]

Oh! Hey there Atsushi! Fancy seeing you here.

[undermoonlight]

Ruby-chan?

[Atsushi lowers his hands, still holding a pinkish candle with engravings that he doesn't understand.]

You too. Are you looking for something in particular? I'm just [And he sets the candle back where he found it,] ... browsing.

[onekindsoul]

That's my name, don't wear it out.

[She says with a grin. She doesn't seem too bothered by the close call collision.]

Not really- At least not yet- Maybe something for Ange if I find something nice.

[She glances at the candle and then grins as she looks at Atsushi.]

You sure you're just browsing?

I bet Makoto would like that.

...You two are still a thing, right?

[undermoonlight]

[His gaze nervously returns to the candle. Is it that obvious? Maybe that means that it would make a good gift? It reminds Ruby of Makoto too, so it's not like Atsushi is mistaken in this case, right?]

I... I think so? But I was gone for a long time apparently.

[Does he still have the right to date someone that he abandoned like that?]

What about Ange-chan? Are you two, um..?

C

[loveandduty]

[Minako for the most part was mostly exploring and getting her bearings as to what was around. Did she actually go into anywhere yet, no. She was just unsure whether to bother or not.

Her mind was thinking about what her next steps would be when she felt a light bump.]

Ah, sorry! I wasn't paying much attention either. [She laughed slightly awkwardly as she put a hand behind her head.]

[undermoonlight]

[He's double startled when he recognizes her voice. Atsushi steps back to get a full look at her, eyes wide with surprise.]

Minako-chan? You're here?! [Should he really be surprised? She's so loyal to Usagi, after all.] How have you been? When did you get here?

[loveandduty]

Of course I am here, I have people here who need me.

[Mostly Usagi, her friends and of course her girlfriend. Those were the most important to her and hopes that in the future she will make more friends.]

I think I arrived here around the same time as everyone else whose here and I am okay. How are you? Have you seen Makoto yet?

[undermoonlight]

Is that all it takes to be here now?

[Minako isn't the first one to say she's here for other people.]

Mm, of course. She was the first person that I looked for. I saw Usagi-chan and Hirano-san were here as well.