Varian (
droptheious) wrote in
deercountry2022-01-02 05:41 pm
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Entry tags:
- ahiru: timmy,
- albert wesker: ref,
- ange ushiromiya: jelle,
- ariadne: wizera,
- darth maul: shade,
- dipper pines: jami,
- kyle broflovski: emma,
- lance: charley,
- luz noceda: pedro,
- manabu yuuki: elle,
- orpheus: qv,
- reaper: vette,
- richie tozier: effy,
- takashi "shiro" shirogane: red,
- the abomination: alba,
- the medicine seller: greenrivers,
- usagi tsukino: jax,
- varian: tf,
- zib: taku
[Open] Keep it locked up, keep it sealed tight
Who: Varian and YOU!
What: Varian's final corrupted days, his beasthood turn and the aftermath. See his corruption/monster page HERE!
When: First 2 weeks of Jan- before the event.
Where: Around the city!
Content Warnings: Applicable content warnings go here. Mentions of death, corruption, dissociation.
Hope you've stocked up - Last days of corruption
Anyone who's close to Varian will have noticed his slow corruption growth over the last two months. By the time January rolls around, things have gotten worse instead of better. By now his skin is made of a thick, black rock. This same black rock has turned his teeth into sharp fangs and his nails into claws. two amber horns sprout out from his head, and his elbows and one remaining ankle have spurs of the same stuff- as is the tail he's since gotten, flicking nervously as he paces around- firey red eyes darting around furtively.
He'd largely been keeping himself out of sight, trying to handle this alone, but his hallucinations have driven him onwards. He stares at things seemingly only he can see. If he comes across you, he'll grip your arm tightly (sorry if those claws hurt, he's not even thinking about it). He points at an empty spot of nothing, worry on his face.
"Eugene!" you are definitely not Eugene, but it's clear that's who he's seeing right now. "We- we gotta deal with these rocks before they take over everything! There's...there's got to be a cavern around here somewhere so we can cut them off, right?"
It's a long night - Monsterdom (Gaze and surrounding area)
Regardless of how much or how little help he gets in his final days of corruption, eventually, Fern decides enough is enough and the best way to handle this is to Fistfight God. Which is to say, he goes off to confront The Tower about this and gets himself killed by Never Mind in the process. Varian got there too late, and being the driving reason behind his boyfriend dying again was the final nail in the coffin for him.
The transformation is quick and sharp, and what's left is a a ten-foot rock monster spewing fire everywhere. His leg is still missing in this form, at least, which should help anyone with a quick ID-check. Varian himself rages through the city, slamming against buildings and breathing fire at anyone foolish enough to come close. It's definitely attracting the attention of nearby hunters- so perhaps finding a way to talk him back down before there's another death today would be for the best?
Nothing good is meant to stay - Aftermath
Eventually, Varian lets his friends in, lets them talk him down and the best hood fades. Parts of corruption still cling to him- his skin is still an unhealthy grey colour and his nails aren't quite back to normal yet. He's also sitting in a ball on the floor- partly out of shock and partly because he can't go anywhere without his leg - if someone could fetch him that, that would be awesome.
Or perhaps you come to him in the days that follow. He mostly stays near the Disaster House in Cassandra, as he waits for Fern to come back to life. He can be found inside the house, or sometimes sitting on the front porch, people-watching. Though he's certainly not better yet, day by day the signs of corruption lessen. Any visitors will get a tired smile, he's still a little withdrawn, but he's getting there.
"H-hey, thanks for checking in," nothing has changed how awkward he is at least! "Um...how are you doing?"
Because obviously, you're here for him to check up on you. Obviously.
[[OOC: The monster battle is intended to be open to any CR who want to take part. No ONE character will be responsible for talking him down from monsterdom, it is intended to be a team effort- hammering home that Varian is able to rely on his support network. Feel free to make separate threads, team up with other players, thread hop, etc. Do what you like, and we can wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey it so it happened around the same time- to make it easier than players trying to keep to one concurrent thread! Go nuts! As always please hit me up on
teeeff for anything! ]]
What: Varian's final corrupted days, his beasthood turn and the aftermath. See his corruption/monster page HERE!
When: First 2 weeks of Jan- before the event.
Where: Around the city!
Content Warnings: Applicable content warnings go here. Mentions of death, corruption, dissociation.
Hope you've stocked up - Last days of corruption
Anyone who's close to Varian will have noticed his slow corruption growth over the last two months. By the time January rolls around, things have gotten worse instead of better. By now his skin is made of a thick, black rock. This same black rock has turned his teeth into sharp fangs and his nails into claws. two amber horns sprout out from his head, and his elbows and one remaining ankle have spurs of the same stuff- as is the tail he's since gotten, flicking nervously as he paces around- firey red eyes darting around furtively.
He'd largely been keeping himself out of sight, trying to handle this alone, but his hallucinations have driven him onwards. He stares at things seemingly only he can see. If he comes across you, he'll grip your arm tightly (sorry if those claws hurt, he's not even thinking about it). He points at an empty spot of nothing, worry on his face.
"Eugene!" you are definitely not Eugene, but it's clear that's who he's seeing right now. "We- we gotta deal with these rocks before they take over everything! There's...there's got to be a cavern around here somewhere so we can cut them off, right?"
It's a long night - Monsterdom (Gaze and surrounding area)
Regardless of how much or how little help he gets in his final days of corruption, eventually, Fern decides enough is enough and the best way to handle this is to Fistfight God. Which is to say, he goes off to confront The Tower about this and gets himself killed by Never Mind in the process. Varian got there too late, and being the driving reason behind his boyfriend dying again was the final nail in the coffin for him.
The transformation is quick and sharp, and what's left is a a ten-foot rock monster spewing fire everywhere. His leg is still missing in this form, at least, which should help anyone with a quick ID-check. Varian himself rages through the city, slamming against buildings and breathing fire at anyone foolish enough to come close. It's definitely attracting the attention of nearby hunters- so perhaps finding a way to talk him back down before there's another death today would be for the best?
Nothing good is meant to stay - Aftermath
Eventually, Varian lets his friends in, lets them talk him down and the best hood fades. Parts of corruption still cling to him- his skin is still an unhealthy grey colour and his nails aren't quite back to normal yet. He's also sitting in a ball on the floor- partly out of shock and partly because he can't go anywhere without his leg - if someone could fetch him that, that would be awesome.
Or perhaps you come to him in the days that follow. He mostly stays near the Disaster House in Cassandra, as he waits for Fern to come back to life. He can be found inside the house, or sometimes sitting on the front porch, people-watching. Though he's certainly not better yet, day by day the signs of corruption lessen. Any visitors will get a tired smile, he's still a little withdrawn, but he's getting there.
"H-hey, thanks for checking in," nothing has changed how awkward he is at least! "Um...how are you doing?"
Because obviously, you're here for him to check up on you. Obviously.
[[OOC: The monster battle is intended to be open to any CR who want to take part. No ONE character will be responsible for talking him down from monsterdom, it is intended to be a team effort- hammering home that Varian is able to rely on his support network. Feel free to make separate threads, team up with other players, thread hop, etc. Do what you like, and we can wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey it so it happened around the same time- to make it easier than players trying to keep to one concurrent thread! Go nuts! As always please hit me up on
![[profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
Aftermath
But she comes, every day, catching him, this time, on the porch, watching people pass by in high spirits since Madame Generosity made her various visits.
She sets down the basket next to him and immediately fishes out a scarf from the basket, wrapping it around Varian's neck.
"You are not out here without a scarf... OR gloves. Hands, gimme." She pulled out black leather gloves from the basket as well.
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He allows her fussing with no complaint beyond a put-upon little sigh. He lifts his hands- thankfully the claws almost gone at this point to her.
"You do know as a coldblood I don't actually feel the cold, right?" his tone is tired, but teasing too. "Like I literally can't get cold anymore."
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CW: past minor self-harm
CW: past minor self-harm
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Monsterdom
Luz knew that things were getting bad for a while. She'd tried talking to Varian, had even tried getting extra incense and looking after him when she could, but there was no denying the fact that things were getting worse and worse. Nothing she was doing was helping, and Varian was barely holding it together.
Even Luz wasn't prepared for the tipping point though. Once Dirk arrived at their door, Luz had been upstairs in her room, and then the house shook with a deafening roar that got her attention. Luz got up and hurried downstairs, and found that things were in disarray and then, to her horror, the last bits of Fern, crystallized and not more than some shavings of grass.
Luz fell to the ground, and was breathing hard, clenching and unclenching her hands. Her whole body was locked in shudders, and she could feel her own corruption in the back of her throat, the fangs protruding, her head reeling back.
Calm. CALM! No! This is not the time!
And it wasn't. She knew that. Breaths. Breaths, In. Out.
She'd have to deal with Fern's demise later. It was VARIAN she had to worry about. He was corrupted, no way he wasn't now. So they'd need all the help they could get so Varian didn't wind up the same.
"Guys? GUYS! Who's in the house?!"
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But nobody's explained Beasthood to her yet. She didn't know what was going to happen to him, or how easy it'd be to tip him over the edge like this. So at the sound of Luz's frantic yelling, Rapunzel doesn't connect the dots - she only knows something's wrong, and she rushes downstairs to help.]
I'm here-! Luz, what's going on??
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Aftermath
At which point, she decided, he wasn't going to be getting rid of her any time soon.
She made herself quite at home in his house, cleaning up after the fight, bringing him blankets and books and water, more or less hovering like a mother hen. It was actually sort of funny to her. She'd always been kind and supportive, but she'd never really felt maternal before. Maybe that's what this was. Or maybe it was just guilt that she hadn't been able to help.
Either way, that was the state of things. At least until Fern came back. And she was sure he would. In the meanwhile, there she was, fussing over Varian again, this time fluffing his pillows. "There. That should be good and comfy."
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But not half as much as how she's treating him now. Ariadne doing so much around the house- when he knows the rest of his housemates are definitely feeling the pain from the loss of Fern and what happened to him- speaks volumes about her. Maternal urges or guilt, she's instrumental in helping him down the road to recovery. He doesn't even treat her fussing with his usual level of teenage disdain. He knows he needs it.
"Thanks, Ariadne," he'll lean back on the pillows soon as she's finished fluffing them. "Hah, kinda feeling pretty spoiled right now. You've ruined me forever."
He's mostly teasing, he's still tired, not quite right there, but he's trying for some level of normalcy.
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monster mash
He would rather die than bring his young friend any harm.
It isn't difficult to find a large fire rock monster raging through the streets; Bigby is rushing through and following the trail of destruction in his own beastly form, his omen following and keeping up.
And there he is. Varian, consumed by beasthood, easy to spot and easy to know.
Varian! he calls out with his omen. Wait!]
Re: monster mash
dance with me, she wants to say but the words lodge in her throat. ]
Mr. Bigby . . .
Re: monster mash
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not late, no marble, did bring drinks
Re: not late, no marble, did bring drinks
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finally slams in here
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( aftermath )
she really was useless. but what did you expect? she's just a duck. even last month when people were hunting her, she couldn't do anything to protect herself or others.
just a duck. not really a girl. she continues to make sure the house is okay, tidying up and checking up on fern listlessly. ]
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So he's quietly moving his way around his caretakers- trying to get a moment to catch his breath when he stumbles into Ahiru. He offers her a small smile regardless, he's noticed she's...not quite right, and if one thing he's gained from this experience, it's that sort of thing can't be ignored.]
...Hey, Ahiru. You uh- you doing okay, there?
1/???
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3/3 END
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monsterdom
That sure doesn't look like a creature he has seen before from this distance, and at first, he's almost excited. It's something new to look at, and naturally, as someone who considers himself an investigator of monsters, it's worth looking into and studying.
That is, until it gets closer to where he's observing from this rooftop, and he realizes that he recognizes those amber rocks on the creature's back--they were the same ones he remembered seeing attached to Varian in the last few weeks. Which means... wait. It's not what he thinks this is, is it?]
... Varian? Is that you?
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There's a flicker of something in his face- recognition perhaps- enough that he doesn't immediately go onto the attack. He turns his attention to a hunter who's trying to fire arrows at him- them bouncing harmlessly off his thick hide. He snarls, shooting off some fire in their direction. This is fine, this is totally fine. ]
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["Winds of Beasthood" - Monsterdom]
It's not hard to spot a ten-foot rock creature lumbering through the narrow alleyways and he vaults onto another rooftop for a better vantage point. Landing, he keeps his posture slack and unconfrontational, though he keeps one hand under his feathered cloak, weighting a Paleblood grenade in one gloved palm, in case of necessity.
"Varian! What happened, lad, I'd hoped you'd be wiser than this!" he calls, in his usual voice.
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It's a long night
Ignoring every sane instinct, Kyle rushes towards the center of destruction in Gaze. Luz had said she and others would be at Willful Machine. If he can even begin to steer Varian that way, maybe they'll be able to fix him.
He rounds a corner and suddenly it's just there: a huge, craggy monster. Buildings burn merrily around it.
Last chance to run.
Kyle takes a deep breath and then waves his arms. "HEY! HEY YOU! Varian! Yeah, over here!"
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He turns, his growl low, focusing on his friend. His claws rake down the side of the building as he drops on all fours...or all threes, in his case. Something like recognition sparks in his eyes as he leans in to stare at Kyle, waiting, his tail flicking back and forth like an angry cat.
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Last Days | Video | UN: alcaid [1/2]
[Instead, it opens with a shaky cam slowly focusing on a cork board.]
Video | UN: alcaid [2/2]
[Once it's in focus, Dipper slides into frame. He looks ...harried and a little manic.]
Dude. Varian, hey, so, something crazy just happened and you're the best person I know for knocking theories around with so if you're around I could use your help.
[He turns to look at the board for a moment, before he looks at the camera.]
Apparently, I just kind of blacked out, and my sister said she watched me shuffle around like some kind of zombie, speaking in garbled nonsense, while my eyes were glowing and I just. Tacked a bunch of stuff to this board and strung it all up like it needs to be solved.
Not gonna lie, dude, I'm losing it a little. I'm not sure where to start and the first thing that jumped out at me was all the plant stuff I guess I just ripped out of one of my textbooks. Those were from Deerington how am I going to replace those-
Anyway! Let me know if you've got any ideas.
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1/2
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monsterdome
Or...
When all is said and done, the Medicine Seller lives up to his job description. From his bag, he produces containers of burn cream, poultices and gels, various disinfectants, bandages, and a kit for stitches. He came prepared, after all. And he doesn't even charge for it.
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Aftermath
That gave way to Fern being gone though, and so everything, as much as she tried, felt sort of hollow and dark and empty now, and it was so frustrating Luz had to go back to her room and try to calm herself, remembering Varian's fate and doing her best to cope. She had been sad in Deerington when Fern was hurt and Varian killed, but it felt twice as bad now. She missed seeing the boy sparring by himself or just smiling happily with Varian. It felt WRONG without him.
After two days, Luz walks into Varian's room, a peace offering in the form of his leg, shined up, and trying to see him with a nonplussed look on her face.
"Varian," she began. "Your leg."
Of course, seeing him in his recovering state is enough to break her resolve. Luz puts down the leg and hugs Varian, angry and scared and just so, so glad he was back and recovering.
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He moves to sit up a little better as Luz enters, a small smile tugging his lips as she enters with her peace offering.
"Hey, you fix it u-"
And that's about all he manages until she latches onto him. He stills for a second, before wrapping his arms around her in turn, hugging her back tightly. He rubs her back gently, his emotions nearly getting the better of him for a moment, his voice wavering.
"It's-it's okay."
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last days of corruption
Sure, it might not be too far in January just yet.. But still, it's only in this moment that Ange realises just how bad Varian has gotten in the slight time she hasn't seen him. The stuff on his skin was already there, but it seems to have spread, not to mention those horns, the way his claws poke into her skin..
This isn't good.
It's that thought - and Ange's incredible pain tolerance - that keep her from focusing on the way those claws dig into her. Instead she just stares over at Varian, barely managing to contain the shock behind her pokerface at the last moment.
Especially when she hears what he's saying. God. He's thinking about what happened back home, isn't he.
".. Varian," Ange says. Her tone is level, making sure it sounds calm. She's not sure she can stabilize him the way she tried while hanging out with him and Fern before, but she can at least try.
Or at the very least - she can see if he now recognizes who he's actually speaking to, now she's spoken up.
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But for now, as much as his face seems to recognise her- it's not her as herself. His mind is somewhere else, dealing with a different problem, seeing a different person. It's the only way he can rationalise all his hallucinations now. He's at home and he's seeing other things, the red rocks are making it happen. Cass has done...something.
But when 'Eugene' speaks in a voice that isn't his, he blinks. Confusion crosses his expression and he lets go of Ange's arm, taking a step back from her. The confused fog stays on his face a moment more, before recognition- real recognition- seeps in.
"Ange? What are you-" he looks around, panic seeping in. "This- this isn't Corona."
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Aftermath
"I'm fine, it's you I'm worried about. I'm sorry I couldn't help when you went all...you know. Luz sent me to go make sure Fe--"
Maybe he shouldn't bring up Fern's death, even if it was just to say he was making sure Fern had enough fertilizer in his pot.
"Luz sent me to go take care of something."
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The near mention of Fern does cause a flicker of pain across his face, as his gaze drops to the empty spot in the bed they share. He misses him, he knows he'll be back, it just takes time, but good lord, he misses him.
"Hey, don't worry about it. I'm happier to know you were here and safe," because Luca getting hurt is something he wants to avoid more than anything. "I know Fern would have wanted that too. And...I'm glad he wasn't alone."
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Monsterdom
[He's studying it, trying to place why the rocky bits, the way they're formed, look so familiar... when his Omen's attention focuses hard on the missing leg.]
[Pieces snap into place.]
... Shit.
[Well. Mark this down for only the fourth time ever that Shiro has said anything resembling a swear. But what else is he supposed to say? What is there to say? Short of a message home. A quick, brief - Varian in trouble, helping before going forward. Before charging forward, really.]
[There's no way he can let the hardcore hunters have a crack at one of his own. Not with their methods.]
- Varian!
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He growls, low and rumbling, but there is some sort of recognition there- he isn't attacking immediately. The local hunters are definitely starting to congregate though, shouting and gathering their weapons to deal with the threat in their midst.]
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last days
He hadn't thought—Christ, but this hurts to see. Also, the grip hurts too. He hisses in pain.
"Shit," he says. "Ow, fuck, Varian." He pulls his arm away from Varian's claws, looks around, and gnaws on his lower lip. "You sure you don't need your eyes checked? I don't see any rocks around, and you know my eyesight's total shit."
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"Oh- you're not- you're Richie," he knows that, he knows that- he frowns, looking around them at the rocks jutting out everywhere. "N-no, they're here. Look-!"
He points at a completely empty spot. Absolutely nothing is there.
"They- they're what's causing all the hallucinations! It happened back home, too!"
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It's a long night
Setting about the difficult and inadvisable task of re-stringing his guitar while sprinting towards the plumes of black smoke and distant glow of fire above the rooftops, he finishes just in time to come face to face with the source of it all. His own prophecy echoes in his head. The beast that is becoming bears the spark of his despair.
He swallows, hard, and steps forward, into the roiling heat radiating off of the creature - of Varian - and begins to play.
"Down in the valley
Valley so low
Hang your head low, dear
Hear the wind blow"
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Unfortunately, the hunters aiming to use his calmed state to their advantage starting to circle closer to him seem to have other ideas. They throw some spears at him, which harmlessly bounce off his solid rock form, but it distracts him from the music. He roars, spitting out fire in an angry arc at them, unfortunately, they've chosen to run towards Orpheus himself, so that's the way the flame moves.
cw: burns
cw: burns
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monsterdom
Crisis mode is activated, and the first thing Manabu thinks about when he sees smoke billowing a few streets away is how to get civilians to safety. He shouts people out of their houses along his way toward the source, directing them to districts that are more upwind of whatever's causing th--
Holy crap.
As far as monsters go, this one sticks out. No pulsing pustules, no blood or ooze...just fire and amber and stone. He can only stand and gawk for but a moment before snapping back to action, taking out his pistol and firing a few purposefully off-target shots within the beast's eyeline, hoping to catch its attention before another house can get bashed.
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Weirdly, he doesn't attack. Doesn't charge- almost as if he knows him, which he does. Whatever is left in there of Varian is keeping him from destroying the people he cares about. So he shifts closer to Manabu- making an equally purposefully off-target swipe with a huge clawed paw- sweeping the air above Manabu's head. Quit it.
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Aftermath
Obviously winding up at Varian's door is a total accident. Pure coincidence. There's some perfectly logical explanation for it other than that he wanted to check up on Varian too. Probably.
So, he knocks on Varian's door.
"Hey, uh." Stan coughs into his hand, as though that will make this less awkward. "...You home in there?"
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Varian himself doesn't look great when he opens the door. Better than he was- so much better than he was - only slight hints of his corruption hang on like the aftermath of the flu. His skin still has an ashen tone to it, and his fingernails are still a little too sharp and long to be human. He looks pretty damn tired, worried. Until Fern comes back to them, this is about as good as he'll get.
"Oh...hi," his brow creases confused by this of all visitors, he glances behind him, at the plant pot. "Fern's- he's not...come back yet."
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Aftermath
[She's still walking with the assistance of the Big Stick Mabel found her, but it is sure better than landing face first on the ground every five seconds.]
[And so Dipper slips into the house quietly and heads straight for Varian's room, knocking once before peeking her head in.]
Varian? Hey man, are you up?
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The pot with the crystalised strands of grass which make up Fern is sitting on the windowsill, trying to get whatever scant sunlight they can. Looking at them makes Varian's heart hurt. He glances up at the unknown voice, brow furrowed.]
...Yeah? Um- come on i- [and then he sees the face, and confusion crosses his own features] ...Dipper?
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Aftermath
This was beasthood, was it? He knew Varian had a shady past full of questionable deeds, but he would have thought the kid more resilient. This was the cost of getting close, wasn't it? It was good that he wasn't living there anymore.
Still, once the corruption had calmed, he made his appearance when Varian happened to be seated outside of the house. His arrival was proceeded by a black peacock fluttering down from a rooftop to come to stand on the fence, strutting along with a swish of extravagant tail feathers. Wraith came to a stop and gave a rustle of feathers, watchful.
Reaper glided down a full minute later, using Wraith to assess the situation before physically coming. He came to rest silently on his feet by the fence gate and eased his hip to rest against it, folding his arms over his chest.]
Do you require anything?
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The peacock- extra as he is- is a sign of only one person and the sight of him brings a tired smile to Varian's face- one that only grew when the man himself made an appearance. ]
Trust me, I'm not allowed to require anything. I've pretty much got round-the-clock care. I had to sneak out to get here.
[His tone isn't bitter, it's actually pretty grateful. As anti-social as he tends to be, it's something he's needed.]
It's good to see you.
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Aftermath (/handwavey motions at battle stuff if that's ok)
And eventually when there was an opening to try it and Varian was held in place by another of his friends, he launched himself forward to try and take some of his pain with touch. It was… a lot to say the least. Overwhelming. When it got to be too much, he let go and then tried talking, tried restraining him, working with anyone close-by to contain and reach him. And finally, eventually, it was over and Lance… opted to give him space to breathe and be held by the people closest to him.
He'd check in later, he decided. And so here he's come despite some (dumb) reservations. He's riding a giant white direwolf bigger than a draft horse and has a guitar slung over his shoulder and a couple large packs tied together like saddlebags. When Varian asks him how he's doing, he raises an eyebrow.]
Dude, don't steal my line. Not cool.
totes aok!
He smiles as Lance comes into view, genuinely glad to see him. ]
Hah, okay, fair. Didn't mean to sneak up on your style. [He peers at the packages strapped to the direwolf, curious. ] What;ve you got there?
[Maybe a little more deflecting, but he does want to see what Lance has brought along. ]
...Thanks. For helping me, by the way. I don't remember everything very well, but I know you tried to help me out. I...appreciate it.
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Aftermath
It's not that she explicitly tried. She just... happened to notice him hanging around this particular house in Cassandra one day. And, following the news on the network about his recent beasthood, she thought she might... go see? If he was still... Him?
And he's looking okay! Well, not okay. Because nobody's okay in this nightmarish city, Cassandra assumes. But, he's alive. That's important.
...She feels so stupid, just, walking up like this. Sure, she's wearing a cloak that conceals the greater part of her face and the rest of her body, but there's still a slight glow beneath it.
A tempered voice calls to Varian from beyond the porch.]
You're not looking very beastly.
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Sorry, Cass, your disguise isn't that good.]
I got better. Thankfully. That was...a pretty bad time there for a while. [Lightly:] Apparently the power of friendship does wonders.
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Monsterdom
So Maul will do his part to try and save the boy he's come to see as family. Maul goes out, lightsaber at his waist, but he doesn't draw it when he finally comes face to face with the monster that used to be his young friend. Maul stares at him for a moment as he rages. Other hunters are there and Maul tells them to stand back. They regard him with dubious looks, thinking Maul is about to do something stupid which will get him killed. But he insists.
So Maul finds himself face-to-face with the giant monster. He stands there unflinching as he thinks of what best to do. He'll try to reach the boy within even if he thinks this is a very stupid and foolish idea.]
You know, when you eventually come back to yourself, you are going to have a lot more self-loathing and shame to deal with.
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Maul is absolutely right, of course- but right now Varian doesn't seem to acknowledge that fact at all. ]
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